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Crossing Borders
10-01, June 8, 2001
Published by Ken & Lynette Chandler - Love Across The Globe
www.angelfire.com/ok2/kenandlynette
If you can't read this e-mail properly, go to the online version here. For archives, get it here.
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Lynette's Musings
In our last issue, we talked about going camping. How did it go? It
was a major adventure. We had a little of everything, sun, rain, storms. The
lake was beautiful not mention deep. Did we catch any fish? I did! Oh... no
biggies but it was fun all the same. This week, my adorable country boy is
upgrading himself. We are learning to play golf! We spent 5 hours on the driving
range last night and we both ache all over! When will our adventures end? Never.
One of the things we agreed on when we first met was to keep our sense of wonder
and adventure open, that we'd try everything either one suggests together. We
believe it has helped us keep our romance alive and it very much is.
Meanwhile, all this time Crossing Borders has always assumed our readers to
be young and childless like we are (were?). We are aware that some of you are
not as fancy free as we were and have children to think about in the course of
deciding on migration. Children of all ages are sensitive to change and a huge
change like moving to another country can be most stressful. This week's article
by Shelly Seale, President of Relocation Property Services provides us with lots
of helpful tips and ideas how to lessen the stress on your children and even
yourself.
Also, Crossing Borders has been passive and we want to change that as much as
possible to being active. Why? because CB is for YOU. Tell us what topics you
would like us to cover. Have you been in a unique situation you think other CB-ers
should learn of? What are your experiences with the migration process? We are
open to any stories and it does not necessarily have to be an experience with
moving to the U.S. So, help us make Crossing Borders better! Click
here to submit your ideas or story. Do not worry about language or crafting
a novel. Just tell us your idea or experience and we'll do the writing. Looking
forward to hear from you.
~Lynette Chandler~
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How to Ease the Trauma of Relocating for Children
By Shelley Seale, President
of Relocation Property Services
Every year, one out of five American
families move. One of the most important issues to anyone with kids is their
reaction to the news that they're moving, and their adjustment to the
new home. Being informed is very important to children. One of the worst
mistakes we can make as adults is to assume that kids
don't care or won't
understand the details. Keeping them "in the loop," consulting them about
choices whenever possible, and including them in the family game plan will
work wonders toward their adjustment.
Other factors depend on the
child's age:
Preschool children:
Kids under the age of six may
worry about being left behind, or being separated from their parents. If you
go on an orientation or house-hunting trip beforehand without the children,
it's important to reassure kids this age that you will be back;
bring something unique back to them from the new town. It's
very important for them to express their feelings and fears about
the move. Give them a job to do -- have them be responsible for boxing up
their favorite toys, and "labeling" their boxes with crayons and
stickers.
Ages 6 to 12:
Elementary age kids are usually most
concerned with how the everyday routines of their lives are going to change.
Showing them pictures, videos and magazines of their new home will help a
lot, especially if you can find new places in advance for the things they
like to do. If your child takes dance lessons, find & share information
about the new dance studio she can go to. If he takes karate, or plays soccer
or baseball...even if her favorite thing to do is the park or the pizza
parlor, find these places in your new neighborhood and get brochures,
pictures or videos.
Teenagers:
These kids are most concerned
with fitting in. They may react angrily to the move, even insist they're not
going. This is usually due to the total lack of control they have
over everything important in their lives--friends, school &
jobs-- being disrupted. These children can be very worried about making
new friends, and what will be different in the new school. They are curious
about the clothing, hairstyles,
bicycles, cars, etc. that kids in the new
city will have. Pictures of all these things are very helpful, so if you take
an orientation trip be sure to take many detailed photos/videos of the
schools they will be attending.
Other tips for making the
transition:
1. Give young children an entertaining travel kit for the
move.
2. Give older children a diary for recording the trip & move.
3.
Give children of all ages a special address book & stationary set for
keeping up with old friends.
4. Take videos of the new home if the kids won't
get to see it before the move. Arrive well before the movers so kids
can explore and become acquainted first.
5. Give children a chore to do,
such as working on their room (younger), supervising little siblings
(middle), and painting or arranging furniture (older kids).
6. Take a
break with the family as soon as possible to explore the museums, sights and
recreation in your new city.
7. Arrange a visit to new schools and a meeting
with the teacher before the actual first day of attendance.
8. Encourage
the children to bring new friends home.
Shelley
Seale
Relocation Property Services
888-335-RELO
http://www.rpsrelocation.com
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