Broken Windows
I rise from my bed and walk to the window.
I look through the window to see down below;
willow trees that are covered by fallen snow.
I shiver from the cold that slowly creeps underneath my flesh.
The coldness of loneliness, fear, depression and sorrow
reside around this frail mortal shell; a shell that you
will never see.
I have only the window to protect this shell...
I only wish it were your hands instead.
Away from the window I walk, away from
the coldness that I can see dressed in white.
Away from the window I walk, away from the fright of
my own dismay. I do so slowly walk away...
Am I such a vexation that you wish me gone?
Am I such a bestial that howls outside the window
of your soul;
and rising my banshee like voice
screaming, " Let me in! Let me in! Let me come back home!"
Am I such a vexation that I can only be a mortal's
curse upon you?
Myself...
I curse the day....
for cursing you, if so I am your
vexation.
I walk to the window once more, to hopefully see a
renascence that would excite my eyes and delight my dark pride.
Faster, and faster my legs carry me; I can feel
myself running free; taking flight into the air,
catching the wind and having sweet freedom!
My body collides with the glass and then pierces
through, penetrating the purity of protection;
a protection that I had once so admired;
that window, that I looked through.
That window that protected me from the coldness,
loneliness and depression.
The once clear, protecting glass becomes one with
my flesh; Shards of glass penetrating my skin, letting
my mortal blood spill unto the jagged pieces;
dripping on the floor as my body flies through the
mortal portal of fear and hate.
The window that once protected me from elements of nature;
That once protected me from elements of fevered human tortures.
Give way to MY will.
I wish to become one with the elements.
I need not protection.
I wish to become your fear;
your hate, your utter disgust for;
"Indescribable feelings that wrench your mind..."
Feelings that "wrench" your mind...
Your words are beginning to fade as your memory
.
I can not feel your words, for my body is too
consumed with Broken Window pieces:
The glass gorged in my thigh, was the trust I had.
The glass stuck in my belly, was the hunger that will now stop.
The glass transpierced in my heart, keeps my soul from being free.
The glass that permeates my womb, was the home my child will never know.
Not a piece of shard fell into my eyes;
for they were saved to be allowed to see you.
That was the last thing I wanted; the last thing I
remeber wanting... before my body
demolished the treachery of the snow covered willows.
I am consumed in a moment of silence.