Stuff About Me...

:::Oh Yes...I Hear That....:::

Well that's the end of that...I can't list all my friends...you people know who you are damnit...INSTEAD, I'ma list some of the great phrases I've ever heard from people I know...stuff that's just straight off the wall and is on piss-my-pants status...see if you can find one that's yours...here we go...

--"Don't throw me down Clark!!"

--*raspy voice* "Congraaaatulationsssss....get offf my piiiipe...."

--"You sold me out you bastard!!!!"

--*gasp* "You're URINATING!!!!"

--"Some guy got his head blown off at a place called 'Hooper's'"

--"My name is Florida....FLOOORRRIDDAAA...that's the name of a state.............why is my name Florida..."

--"Did you see that????? When Dave was talking his TicTac fell out of his mouth.....it looked like he was losing his teeth...."

--"Thusss isss my job!! Ain't it Bushy????"

--"Look at me!!! I'm smmmmoking!!! Dog!! I said look at me!!!!........freezing my nips off out here..."

--"How DARE you sorry my good name with your slanderous FILTH!!!!"

--"How can you argue with dat?"

--"Dinkin...HAHAHA!!! That's funny!!! Used in a sentence: 'Today at work, Jen was just dinkin around.'" "I got a lot of dinkin last night!!"

--"I don't think you'll be wanting to go into the Land Of The Make-Believe today Mr. Rogers....you'll find that it's in RUINS!!!!"

--"Make sure you don't pull an ace or else you might cut yourself a throat."

--"Oooooooooooooooo!!!! You Lord Of The SNAKE!!!"

--"You hafta have a good voice for rapping...I don't....I'd be one of those people who started crying when they get kicked out."

--"'Nature Of Illness'???"........"...pizza face..."

--"I suppose you're going to tell me you got some!!?? Don't tell me that because I will suffocate you!!!! I will!!!! They're big enough!!!! Like body bags!!!!!"

--"Oww my finger!!! OOWW MY ASSSSS!!!!!!!!"

--"Hey, is that that guy there...Rubin Pauls...you know...PeeWee Herman??" "You mean Paul Rubins???" "Yeah..yeah..him..." "HAHAHAHA!! Trace you're dumb!!! Rubin Pauls!!! HAHAHA!!! Sounds like a disease!!!"

--"I says to myself I says, 'SELF!...boy you're good...' and self said, "I know..."

--"Hey!! That sounds like a good idea!!! But I dunno about camping there with all those _______...and no car to get away..." "Oh yes...I remember what happened last time.."

--"Hey look....you're shedding...And there TOO!!!"

--"HURRY UPPP!!!!!!!....Damn snapper heads..."

--"Do not pass go!! Do not collect 200 dollars!!" Thanks for the free parking........

--"THEY CALL ME..........GLASS MAAANNNN!!!!"

--"...a case of coca cola classic...we've got a 2-6...we need some mix...."

--"I guess it's better this way...he did smell kinda funny..." "Yes. Yes. That's true..."

--"That rabbit's like...'OPEN THE PHUKIN' DOOR!!...The bastard...phuk I'll get him..."

--"They'll ask me for your number and I'll say '1-800-SLUT!' HAHAHAHAHA!!!" "No no...'1-800-DIRTY-SLUT'" "HAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!! DIRTY SLUT!!! You said that shit yourself!! Not me!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!...dirty slut..." "Shaddup already!"

--"Trace you should have seen me nekkid...I looked like a wet dog...But you can see me now...I'm better."

--"Your hamster's staring at me going to the bathroom from across the room....MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!!!...there..she put her head down...hahaha..."

--"...they don't smell like shoes...they smell like death..."

--"HACHOOOO!" "Curse you." "HUH!?" "I said 'CURSE YOU!'. 'Cause it occurs to me that rather than saying 'Bless you' to people who spray their spit and germs in my face, I should be doing quite the opposite. SO curse you JoAnn, you inconsiderate, ear-splitting, microbe-spewing fountain!....*PUNCH*...DEEAAAA!!! GAWWWWDDDD!!! AND CURSE YOU FOR THAT TOO!!!!"

--"Yooooouuuu...both of yooouuu....oooh what I'm gonna do to you...first...I'm gonna tear your lips off...yeah... next...I'm gonna RIIIIP your arm outta the socket...THEN...I'm gonna hit YA! And you're gonna faaalll...And I'm gonna look down at you... and I'm gonna laugh...But first! FIRST!....I got to take a whiz. Don't you go nowhere...."

--"Little Jenny stuck her finger where it doesn't BELONG.....*silence*....A DOOR HINGE!!!" "What the fuu--??"

--"Yeeeahh...some kinda moose came and tore up your campsite and ripped this here chair....and we all took pictures of said moooose..."

--"Personally I don't believe it...."

--"Hey Trace...remember that 16 year old?? HAHAHAHAHA!" "Why you always gotta bring up old shit?"

--"*singing* 'cause you don't...wanna fuck with Tracy...'cause Tracy...will fuckin' kill you..." "Ok loser." "Bastard."

--"OH! I'm gagging!! OH!!! OHHH!!!!"

--"Then the light turned red and BOOM!!!!!! right into the back of the bus...and I was like... 'Ooohhhhh...I'm flying!!!!' and then a damn fence got in my way."

--"Hey...there's a nekkid dude in these pictures!" "LEMME SEEE!!!" "NEEEEUUUU!!!!"

--"Tracy, your teeth are big and green, Tracy, you smell like gasoline...Tracy, da..da..da.. Tracy....something.....Anyway as you can see I have enclosed along with this letter the negatives of...'Our Trip To Banff'...aaannnd...Drum roll please, the negative of a picture of your love GOD.....

aaron

."

--CLING! CLING! CLING!

--"You fat ass...that never happens when I get down on it..." "Hahaha..get down on it...get down on it...we just wanna party with ya...all we wanna do is make ya dance... no standin' on the wall..." "Shaddup."

--"eeehhhh...you're such a necrophilic..."

--"Your head looks like a cadaver..." "WHAT!?"

--"Riltenstillen??? Rippleskin???"

--"I can't feel my legs!!" "Man, you never had any legs to begin with!"

--"I'm sorry...I can't muthaphukin' go..."

--"Yeeeeeeeee....looooooks laaaaakkkk....."

--"KEEM ON!!!! KEEM ON!!!"

--"So this is where you spend most of your time..."

--"I'll take your been there done that...and you take my been there done that..."

--"Hey Trace...was he drunk??" "No he was just at home and--HEY WHAT THE FUCK!?"

--"Ohhh...you're not even 'gun' cops...you're just 'flashlight' cops." *pretending to hold out a flashlight* "I SEEN YOU!! I SEEN YOU!!"

--"Like he's gonna wake up and see that there's no milk and say 'FUCK! EVERYBODY DIES!!'"

--"Boy, you sure are noisy over there..." "Yeah, what the hell you doing?? Pitching a tent??"

--"Straight Squawt"

--"I survived the 'TIGHT SQUEEZE'"

--"Maybe I should hit a few buildings on this next turn..."

--"Enough of that Sin Sady..."

--"Are those fawts!!??! Are you fawting!!!???"

--"HAAAAAAAAAAAA......Is ________ DERE??"

--"________ has no electric charge." "WHAT!?...Just give me 5 minutes alone with him..."

--"I think deep down inside Aleeta wants to smell other peoples fawts...cause she's smells 'em! And people always tell her they fawted! They say, 'I fawted', but she won't leave! She'll pause a second... 'YEAH! YOU DID!'"

--"WEBBER BROUGHT A ROWDY!"

--"Upon closer inspection..."

--"That's some serious toilet humor!"

--"From the desk top of...Aleeto...."

--"I hafta go to the bathroom......" "Yeah that's nice."

--"Ohh.....OHHHHH....I got it...I got it..."

--"It was probably some homeless person..." *bump* *bump* "Awww....AWWWW..." "Get outta the way...we're in a hurry!!"

--"Do you have those back home?...Bums with sleeping bags...trying to keep warm in this cold weather..."

--"Oh GAWD!....I slept like an asshole...."

--"Fuck it...I'm alright!"

--"We represent...the Lollipop Kids..."

--"This isn't Kokanee TRACE!"

--"Man...I can't sleep...It's smells like you in here..."

--"Play some of that Teck-Toe..."

--"Well isn't that just gaywads."

--"If you're talkin' double D you can go out there and drag that thing back here yourself!"

--"Is that a rabbit or a horse??"

--"You Flatulent Freak!"

--"HEY! This is such a nice picture!! It doesn't even look like you!!" "Thanks....hey wait...did you just say..."

--"Trace....."

--"Muthaphuka phuked up the pants real good..."

--"Who's Jay-Z Moneypenny anyway??" "Goddamn you...."

--"I WANT SOME! I WANT SOME!" "Fuck it...I'm alright..." "You never scream like that when you're with me..." "Muthaphuka I know what I like!...You don't take the time..."

--"Hey! I told you to wait, you son of a bitch."

--"Why Trace? Is it something I've done?"

That's all for now...

...I ain't impressed....you wanna impress me? Take the wheel for a little while muthaphuka...

LATER!!!!

Email: trace7@mts.net