Military Insignia
The ranks of the British Army.

Mission Impossible
American cop/secret service show starring Peter Graves (the white haired bloke who looks a bit like Leslie Nielson) in which the closed circuit camera systems, heat sensitive body alarms and highly trained security guards at top secret government research establishments are powerless against the cunning ploy of someone walking up to the front gate in an overall, carrying a tool box and claiming that he has come to fix the air conditioning.

Morris Dancing
1. A strange ritual dance performed by owners of Morris Marinas, which took place by the side of busy main roads. The Marina would sit spewing steam and green water over the tarmac while the owner danced around it, hitting it with a stick and chanting the traditional words : 'I'm never buying another British car as long as I bloody live.'

2. The most embarrassing of all English folk traditions. It involves men with beards prancing around holding some hankies, and survives only to provide an item on the regional news on the first day of summer.

Mountain Bike
Basically a 16 geared, wide wheeled Raleigh Wayfarer without the saddle bag, mudguards and bell. Originally designed to cope with the mountainous, rugged and rocky terrain of the Appalachians, it is now very popular in the towns and cities of south-east England. By far the most expensive and posey bike you can buy.

Mouth Organ
A musical device for gathering saliva.

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