Here is a joke:
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?"The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied,"My wife's first husband." My Huge Collection of Blonde Jokes
And of course some quotes to cheer up your day!
I'll add a new one every month
"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else." - Alison Boulter
"Sure, it's going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway."
- Othal Brand, member of a Texas pesticide review
"Journalism consists largely in saying "Lord Jones died" to people who never knew Lord Jones was alive." - G. K. Chesterton
"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist---"
- John B. Sedgwick, general, dying words, 1864
When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle! They're on TV! - Homer Simpson
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. -- A. Whitney Brown
Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what
I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says "You." After that, I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death .
Death is a once in a lifetime experience.
The red nose might get you through fog on Santa's sleigh, but the brown nose will get you everywhere.
And this weeks quotes:
Today is the last day of some of your life.
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