No More Tears

By: Lara

The phone rang. And rang. And rang again. Lara sighed as she pushed her chair back from the computer and reached over for the phone. “Yes?”

“Good afternoon to you, too,” a voice on the other end said cheerfully. “Did I miss something? Is this Be a Bitch Day and no one informed me?”

Lara giggled. “Considered yourself informed. Hello, Nick.”

“Heya, Sweet Cheeks.” She heard him moan slightly as something rustled against the phone.

“Are you still in bed?”

“Um…yes.”

Lara glanced at the clock. “It’s twelve-thirty, Nick.”

“And?”

“Are you alone?”

“Duh…I wouldn’t call you if I wasn’t.” Lara heard Nick sigh. “I was calling to see if you wanted to have breakfast…well…lunch.”

“Where’s Mandy?”

“Costume designer for her new tour.”

“I see.” Lara looked at the clock, looked at her computer, then sighed. “Well…I’m really on a roll here…”

“Please? I’ll buy,” Nick whined.

Lara smiled. That was what she had been hoping for. “Okay. What time can you be here?”

“Gimme half an hour.”

“I’ll expect you in forty-five,” Lara said with a grin, knowing how long it took Nick to get moving when he first awakened.

“Bitch. Later.” Nick hung up. Lara giggled again as she hung up her own phone.

“I win,” Lara said as she opened the door to her apartment. “Forty-five minutes.”

“Shut up, wench.” Nick kissed her cheek affectionately. “How ya doing, Sweet Cheeks?”

“Will you stop calling me that?” Lara crawled around on her hands and knees, looking for her sandal under the sofa.

“It’s cute…and your cheeks ARE sweet,” Nick observed as he watched her crawl around. Lara gave him the middle finger, never stopping her search.

“Here it is.” She sat up and pulled on her sandals.

“Is that new?” Nick motioned to a painting above the TV.

“Yes…you like it?” Lara stood up and looked at the painting proudly.

“Um…it’s all messy,” Nick observed. Lara smacked him.

“It’s a Monet copy. It’s Impressionism. It’s supposed to look like that, and you know it.”

“Of course I know it. You’ve dragged me to enough art museums,” Nick grumbled, turning his baseball cap around backwards. Lara grabbed it and slapped it on her own head.

“You loved it and you know it. You’re the only person I know who enjoys art as much as I do.”

Nick took the hat back and rearranged it on his head. “Yeah, well, don’t tell the other guys. They think I’m just a stupid blond doofus.”

“You ARE.” Lara kissed his cheek back and they headed out to Nick’s car. “Where are we going?”

“Leo’s. I am totally Jonesing for one of their roast beef sandwiches.”

“Oh, excellent! I was thinking how good a sub would taste.” Lara snapped her seatbelt and turned to look at him. “You okay?”

“Sure, why?” Nick carefully maneuvered out of the apartment complex. “You know, this place is a pain in the ass to get out of.”

“Yes, Nick, you say that every time you’re here,” Lara sighed. “You just…I dunno…I don’t remember the last time you called me first thing after you woke up. You’re sure everything’s okay? You and Mandy…okay?”

“As much as we can be,” Nick replied simply, and Lara knew better then to push the topic. “Howie’s back…did you know?”

“No! I’ll have to call him this afternoon,” Lara said happily. Nick chuckled. Kevin’s wife Lisa had introduced Lara to Howie with the hope that they would hook up, but things just hadn’t clicked between them. They were good friends, and she was often his date to various functions, but they weren’t meant to be on a romantic level. Lara was the sister that AJ, Brian and Kevin had never had, and she was the big sister Nick had always wished for. She didn’t take his shit, and she was probably the person outside his family that he was closest to…closer than even Mandy, sometimes.

“He’ll probably call you,” Nick told her. “We have a thing to go to next Friday.”

“I swear, the only time he DOES call me is when you guys have a “thing.” Sweet D my ass,” Lara grumbled, and Nick laughed out loud.

“Well…if he DOESN’T ask you, do you want to go with me? Mandy will be out of town again, and I much prefer you to going solo.”

“Thanks a lot,” Lara said, sticking out her tongue. “Sure, I’ll go with you. But I have to approve your wardrobe first.”

“Okay, Mom,” Nick said, rolling his eyes as he pulled into a parking space.

“I don’t want you embarrassing me,” Lara said with a serious face. Nick looked at her.

“Embarrass you? I embarrass you?” Nick looked hurt. Lara grabbed his hat and grinned as she slammed it on her head once more.

“Not as much as I plan on embarrassing you inside that restaurant.” She was out of the car and halfway into the building before Nick could reply.

“How much longer do we need to stay?” Nick whined as he and Lara entered the ballroom of the ritzy hotel.

Lara checked her watch. “About four more hours.”

Nick groaned. “I need a drink. Want anything?”

“Vodka Collins,” she told him and he wandered over to the bar.

“Hey there, beautiful. Can I take you home with me?” A voice behind her said.

“Depends…are you a Backstreet Boy?” Lara turned around, laughing as Howie’s arms wrapped around her.

“Hey, girl.” Howie kissed her cheek.

“And WHY didn’t you call me? Nick said you might,” Lara said.

“I’ve been busy,” Howie hedged. “Besides, you were his date for this thing anyway. I didn’t get to you quick enough.”

“Whatever.” Lara rolled her eyes. “How are you?”

“Good…busy…I’ve been neglecting my club and I really need to get my ass down there.”

“I haven’t been there in AGES,” Lara exclaimed. “Let me know next time you’ll be there…I’ll stop by.”

“Deal.” Howie took a sip of his drink and smiled as he watched Nick slowly make his way across the floor, carefully carrying his drink and Lara’s, trying not to spill them. “How’s Nicky?”

“Good, I supposed. I get the feeling that he and Mandy aren’t getting along so well.”

It was Howie’s turn to roll HIS eyes. “Whatever. Like that’s anything new. I wish they’d just call it quits. She treats him like shit, and all this getting together and breaking up crap isn’t good for him.”

“You don’t think I’ve tried to tell him that? He doesn’t want to hear it…so I’m just the good friend who listens instead of the good friend who tells him the truth,” Lara told him. Nick reached them and Howie quickly changed the subject.

“So…any news on when the new book will be published?”

“Um…they’re talking next month, actually. Thanks, Nick.” Lara took her drink from Nick, who immediately wiped his hand on his black pants. “Oh, classy, Carter.”

“Yeah, well, they filled it too much,” Nick complained, taking a swig of his beer. “Did you finally pick a title?”

“Yes…and no, I’m not telling you anything. You should just READ one of my books for once, instead of counting on me or Howie or Kevin to give you the Cliff’s Notes version,” Lara snapped, only half-joking. It irked her to no end that Nick always wanted to know what her books were about, but he’d never sit down and read one.

“I’m sorry…I can’t get into books,” Nick apologized. “Even by someone as great as you.”

“Quit kissing up,” Lara replied, but she smiled as she said it.

“You two are like little kids,” Howie commented, chuckling.

“No we’re not!” Lara and Nick said at the same time, then laughed.

“Nicky.” Lisa sailed over, looking very pretty in a short pink dress. “Kevin’s talking to management people. Dance with me.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Nick handed his beer to Howie and followed Lisa to the floor. Howie watched them and smiled.

“He’s miserable,” Howie said without looking at Lara. She sighed.

“I know. I hate it. I hate not being able to help him. I love him so much…he’s like my baby brother or something…and I hate not being able to fix this for him.”

Howie turned to look at her. “How about you? You okay?”

Lara shrugged. “I have you guys…and my work. I was over at Lisa’s watching the baby yesterday and I had the BEST time. I really want that…want someone who loves me like Kevin loves her.” She lightly punched Howie’s shoulder. “Why couldn’t we have worked out, dammit? You’re perfect!”

“Too damn perfect for the likes of you, girlie.” Howie set down the drinks he was holding and took Lara’s drink as well. “C’mon. Dance with me.” Howie took her hand and led her to the dance floor. She laid her head on his shoulder and sighed. “You know, if you’d open up to dates as much as you open up to us, you’d have someone,” Howie pointed out.

Lara looked up to glare at him. “I open up…it’s just I don’t want my heart broken again. Hanging out with you and AJ and Nick is enough.”

“Yes, but maybe one day we’ll get girlfriends and not have that much time for you,” Howie reminded her gently.

“Fine…fine…then I’ll run off and become a nun.”

“Yeah, like THAT will happen,” Howie said, laughing at the thought. The slow song ended and a down and dirty groove picked up.

“What’s going on here?” Nick wandered over.

“Lara’s becoming a nun,” Howie informed him.

“Not if I can help it!” Nick proclaimed. “If you’re a nun, you can’t grind with me. Get over here” Nick grabbed Lara’s hand and pulled her to the center of the dance floor.

“C’mon, Nick. Lean on me.” Lara threw an exasperated look in Howie and AJ’s general direction as she tried to help Nick out of his chair. The party was winding to a close, and Nick was drunk…as he usually was at the end of a party where Mandy was not present.

“Dude…Junior…get up.” AJ snapped, pulling on one of Nick’s hands.

“Up up up!” Nick said with a silly grin, gradually working himself into a standing position.

“We’ll help you get him home,” Howie told Lara with a sigh.

“No, I’ll be fine. I just need to get him into the limo.” Lara looked up at Nick’s blue eyes and was amazed by their sadness. “Come on, Nicky.”

“Get off.” Nick pushed away AJ and Howie. He threw an arm around Lara’s shoulders. “I want my Sweet Cheeks to help me.” He began to move towards the door, walking amazingly well for someone so intoxicated.

“You gonna be okay?” AJ asked Lara, concerned. She nodded.

“My place is closer. We’ll crash there. It’s not like it’s the first time.” She made Nick stop walking so she could kiss AJ and Howie goodbye.

“Call me tomorrow?” Lisa asked and she nodded.

“Bye everyone!” Nick called over his shoulder. They made their way out to the limo, and Nick gratefully collapsed in the backseat.

“I should get babysitting fees,” Lara grumbled, pulling off her high-heeled shoes.

“You love me and you know it,” Nick said, blowing upward to get his bangs out of his face. Lara moved over and brushed them out of the way.

“You’re right. I do. More than I should, ya big oaf.” Nick’s eyes started to close as she spoke. “The only reason I’m not with anyone else is because of you…and Aje…and Howie. No one else can compare,” she continued softly. She was answered only by Nick’s snores.

Nick groaned as he opened his eyes the next morning. The sun was shining through the blue curtains, and it made his head pound even more. He looked around the room in confusion. He didn’t have blue curtains. He carefully rolled onto his side and looked towards the window. Lara was seated on the window seat, looking out at the quiet morning. He studied her for a long moment as his head started to adjust to the fact that he was awake. Her long dark hair was falling down her back, and the sun glinted off of it kind of like a dull halo. Her legs were tucked under her oversized Phillies nightshirt. She had her chin resting on her knees, and a stuffed zebra was shoved between her chest and her knees. Every once in a while she would pull the zebra up to wipe tears from her cheeks. She was sniffling quietly, a trait she had perfected. Nick had learned this from all the sappy movies she had dragged him to.

He slowly sat up, concerned. She didn’t notice. He carefully pulled himself out of bed and slowly walked to the window. She looked up at him and made no move to hide her tears. He sat down behind her, pulling her back against his chest. Neither of them spoke. He wrapped his arms around her, kissing her hair. Lara dropped the stuffed animal and snuggled back against him, allowing herself to sob against his bare skin. They remained this way for almost twenty-five minutes, until Lara finally calmed down to occasional sniffles.

“Wanna talk about it?” Nick asked finally. She shook her head, leaning her cheek against his now-wet chest. “Okay. That’s fine. When you’re ready to, you know, you can.” She nodded. He leaned his face against her hair and sighed. He understood. He felt like crying a lot of times…just to release something. But he couldn’t. Tears would never come, and it was getting harder and harder to deal with.

Lara looked up at him, her blue eyes even bluer from all the crying. She tried to smile but couldn’t. “Just lonely,” she told him. He nodded, understanding that, too. She took a deep breath and stood up. “I need a shower.”

“Can I come?” Nick said, his blue eyes hopeful. She giggled. They flirted harmlessly like this all the time.

“Nope. I don’t shower with people who are hungover.”

“I’m NOT hungover.” Nick stood up too quickly and groaned as he sat back down.

“Go lay down. When I’m out of the shower, I’ll make you some toast and coffee, then YOU can shower.”

“Yes, Mom,” Nick said obediently. He started to make his way back to the bed, then stopped. He came over, cupped her cheek in his large hand, and kissed her nose. “You’re my best friend, did you know that?”

Lara stared up at him, shocked. “I thought Mandy and Brian were your best friends.”

“Brian is a special friend, yes, but even he doesn’t know me inside and out like you do. He knows me different.” Nick shrugged. “Guy thing.” He ignored her reference to Mandy. “Anyway, I just wanted to tell you.”

“Thanks, Nick.” A slow smile crossed Lara’s face. “It means a lot to me.”

Nick smiled, then flopped onto the bed, groaning once more. Lara shook her head and headed for the shower.

“Are you sure you can make it into the house?” Lara asked as she drove into Nick’s driveway.

“Yes…but you can come in if you want.” Nick hated the thought of entering the big empty house.

“Okay…for a minute. I lost a lot of valuable writing time babysitting you this morning.” Lara got out of the car.

Nick rolled his eyes. “Like I’m that hard to take care of.”

“You’re twenty, Nick. Almost twenty-one. You don’t need to be getting shitfaced every time Mandy’s away.”

Nick stopped walking to turn and glare at her. His eyes were like ice. “That’s not why I drink. I drink because I like it. And if you have such a problem with it, you need to just stay away from me, understand?”

Lara pulled back as if he had slapped her. He had never spoken to her in this manner before. “Okay…Nick…okay. I’m sorry. I just worry about you, that’s all.”

“Well, don’t,” Nick snapped. He hated himself for snapping at her but couldn’t bring himself to apologize. He was suddenly very tired. He unlocked the door and Lara followed him in.

“Baby!” A female voice called from the living room. “Guess who’s back early!”

“Mandy?” Nick gasped, a shocked smile crossing his face. Mandy tore down the hall and threw herself into his arms. “Whoa…careful.” Nick gently pushed her away, still not quite steady on his feet. “What are you doing here?”

“The meetings went better than expected and I got out early!” Mandy looked over her shoulder at Lara and her eyes narrowed. “Hello there.”

“Hello,” Lara said, sighing. Mandy had a way of making her feel dull and boring and ugly, and it happened every time they interacted. Mandy didn’t like Nick’s friendship with Lara, but knew better than to make it an issue. “Well, Nick, I am leaving you in more than capable hands. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Lara, wait.” Nick struggled out of Mandy’s embrace and turned towards the doorway, but Lara was already in her car, starting the ignition. Nick sighed and closed the door.

“Nick? Why was she driving you home? Where were you last night?”

Two Weeks Later

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay?” AJ asked Lara as she opened the door to his Mercedes.

“Yes. Why?” She fastened her seatbelt.

“You’re going shopping with me. Shopping with me of your own free will.”

“Ha ha.” Lara rolled her eyes. “While shopping with you SHOULD be an Olympic event, I can survive it for today. If I sit in front of that computer for one more minute I will scream.”

“Okay…I was beginning to worry.” AJ slammed the car into gear.

“Besides, you DID promise me lunch,” Lara told him. He laughed.

“Right. Which first…lunch or shopping?”

“Lunch. I need sustenance to shop with you.”

“So, what are we shopping for?” Lara asked as the waiter served her salad. AJ didn’t immediately answer; he was too busy watching her pick all the onions, eggs and cheese off before carefully sprinkling bleu cheese dressing in designated areas.

“You eat like Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally,” he observed. She rolled her eyes.

“You say that every time we go out,” she reminded him.

“It’s true.” AJ shook his head. “We’re shopping for socks, jeans and shoes.”

“We only have a few hours, Aje,” she told him. “Socks alone will take you six hours.”

“You are SO funny.” AJ stole one of her croutons. “Tell me again why I hang out with you?”

“I show you why most women aren’t good enough for you by pointing out all their flaws?” Lara suggested. AJ chuckled.

“Right.” He studied her carefully as he munched on the crouton. “You’re not okay. Tell Uncle Alex what’s up.”

“I’m fine, Aje,” Lara said a bit snappishly, stabbing at her lettuce.

“You’ve called me every day for a week now. That hasn’t happened in ages. When you’re not with me and you’re not writing, you’re with Howie or Lisa…but not with Nick.” AJ’s brown eyes were serious. “You guys have a fight?”

“You make us sound like an old married couple or something.” Lara met his gaze. “Last time I saw him was the night of the benefit. Actually, it was the next day. He crashed with me, and when I brought him home, Screeching Monkey Girlfriend…I mean, Amanda, was there. She didn’t look happy to see me, as usual, so I backed off. She doesn’t like our friendship, and I really want him to be able to work on this with her, so I haven’t called. Obviously he agrees, because he hasn’t called me.”

“Lara, no woman should choose his friends for him. She doesn’t like Bri much either…is jealous of their friendship, and she’s not asking him not to see Rok.”

“Bri is part of the group,” Lara pointed out. “I’m just…”

“Just his best friend,” AJ interrupted. “You two are like peas in a pod. I swear, it’s almost impossible for me to think of one of you without the other.” A smirk crept into his eyes. “Tell me…Junior good in bed?”

Lara gasped and blushed a furious red. “Excuse me?”

“You guys are so close you’ve GOTTA be fucking.”

“Alexander James McLean, I CANNOT believe you just said that!” Lara almost shouted. “I would never do that, not with Nick, first of all, and secondly not with someone who is involved with someone else!”

“Lara, you haven’t had sex in so long you are afraid they’ve changed it. Nicky is full of hormones and Mandy’s never here. Why wouldn’t you do the horizontal mambo? You guys are so close, I just assumed you were hitting it.”

“We’re not hitting shit!” Lara snapped in a quieter tone. “However, you keep this up and I’m gonna hit you. I can’t believe you…” Lara’s blue eyes narrowed as she saw AJ’s barely suppressed laughter. “You’re joking. You are fucking joking!” Lara couldn’t help but smile. “I so hate you. I hate you to death.”

“But it got you to smile, didn’t it?” AJ grinned at the waiter happily as he served their sandwiches.

“I hate you,” Lara repeated, but she allowed him to take her hand and kiss it.

“Okay, I need these.” AJ did a runway walk in the sixth pair of black dress shoes he had tried on. “These are way cool.”

“They look like the last ones,” Lara said dully from her seat on the sidelines.

“No. These are definitely shinier. Maybe I don’t like the shine.” He turned his feet from side to side, then did a few impromptu dance steps.

“Oh, GOD, Aje, just PICK something,” Lara growled. “My price has gone up. You owe me dinner at the Candlelight for this.”

“The Candlelight? That will cost me over a hundred bucks!” AJ protested.

“See ya!” Lara hopped up and headed for the door.

“Okay…okay…the Candlelight it is,” AJ sighed. The cellphone in his jacket pocket rang. “Get that, would you?”

“Hello?” Lara answered.

“Um…who is this?” Lara heard an anxious male voice she almost recognized.

“Lara, who is this?”

“Lara…it’s Nick. I was actually looking for you.” Relief seemed to fill Nick’s voice. “I need you.”

“Nick, what…”

“I need you. Come over, please. Bring Aje if you like. Just get here now.”

“Okay. Okay, Nicky. I’m there.” She slapped the phone shut. “Nick needs us. Let’s roll.”

AJ squealed into Nick’s driveway. The gates were wide open, and no cars were in the driveway. Lara assumed that Nick and Mandy’s cars were in the huge garage. She was out of the car and running before AJ had it in park.

“Nicky!” She began to pound on the door but it slowly swung open. “Nick, what…” Lara stopped talking as she surveyed the hallway. AJ skidded to a stop behind her, smacking into her back.

“Lara, why did you…” AJ peeked over her shoulder. “Holy hell.”

Books and debris lined the floor in a scattered mess. There were pieces of pottery and glass, and papers were everywhere. A half-melted tub of ice cream lay oozing onto the floor. They carefully walked down the hall and peeked into the living room. Not one painting remained on the walls. Knickknacks and picture frames were smashed on the floor. They wandered to the rec room, where Nick kept his CDs and videos. Jewel cases were scattered across the carpet. Lara gasped and put her hand to her mouth. The mantle above the fireplace was empty. The mantle was where Nick kept many of his trophies, the ones that he couldn’t fit in his study. They heard something coming from the general direction of the kitchen.

“I’m almost afraid to walk back there,” AJ whispered, and Lara nodded. He took her hand and they slowly walked out of the rec room.

Three award statuettes were sitting in pieces on the kitchen table. Nick was behind the island that stretched from the counter, sweeping with a broom. They stopped in the doorway. “Nick,” Lara said. He didn’t look up.

“Thanks for coming. I guess I really don’t need you…I just…I’m sorry for bothering you.” Nick continued to sweep.

“No problem, Junior. We were just shopping,” AJ informed him softly.

“And any way to get out of shopping with Alex is a welcome diversion,” Lara said, trying to make Nick smile. He still wouldn’t look up. “Here, Nick, let me do this. You go clean up somewhere…” Lara gasped as she tried to grab the broom and caught sight of Nick’s face. “Holy shit, Nicky! Who did that to you?” With trembling hands she reached up to the deep gash on Nick’s smooth cheek. Streaks of dried blood led down to the side of his neck.

“I got cut,” he said simply, grabbing the broom back. “Maybe you could sew it up? You sew, right?”

“I do cross-stitch, Nick, that’s NOT first aid!” Lara said. She looked wildly at AJ.

“Nick, what the FUCK happened here?” AJ snapped angrily. “Did someone break in?”

“No…someone broke up.” Nick finally released the broom to Lara and sat down at the table. He played with one of the broken awards.

“Mandy?” Lara whispered.

“She…uh…she got a little angry today.” Nick swallowed deeply. “I told her I was gonna call you and she didn’t like it. I missed you…and I just wanted to talk. All this time I’ve been doing what she wanted, trying to make this work…” He looked up at his friends, his eyes miserable. “I just want someone to come home to, ya know? Someone to love me. I really wanted this to work for us…I wanted something real in my life for once.” He lowered his eyes. “But she hated the fact that you and I were friends…hated the fact that we were so close…closer than she and I were…so she kinda went ballistic.” Nick studied the remnants of the award in his hands. “I stepped out to the store quick…she said she was hungry for ice cream…when I came back she had already destroyed the upstairs.” He motioned to his face. “She threw a plate and it ricocheted off the wall as it broke. I tried to stop her but she was crazy. She finally left after she could find nothing else to break.” He looked up at him, his blue eyes miserable. “Everything. Pictures of my family…she tore them. Awards…she broke them. Notebooks of my poems…she tore them up.” Tears streamed down Lara’s face but Nick’s eyes remained dry. “I…I…”

“I’m gonna call the police.” AJ reached for his cellphone.

“NO, Aje.” Nick’s voice was ice. “Don’t. I don’t want them involved. She’s gone and she won’t be back. I’ll change all the security codes so she can’t get in.” He turned to Lara. “I’d like you to go upstairs and pack her stuff. Could you?”

“Of course, Nick. Anything you want,” Lara whispered.

“At least let me take you to the hospital, man,” AJ begged. Nick shook his head.

“No. I don’t want the publicity.”

“Let me call my doctor,” Lara said suddenly. “She’s actually a good friend, and she’ll come here no questions asked. You need that cut checked.”

“Okay,” Nick finally agreed.

“Go ahead upstairs,” AJ told Lara. “We’ll clean up down here.”

“Okay,” Lara said, staring at Nick doubtfully.

“There’s boxes in the storage closet in the hallway,” he told her. “Thank you.”

The words were simple but his tone was pained. Lara nodded and slowly made her way up the stairs.

Lara had lugged the fourth box downstairs when the doorbell rang. She flung it open. “Oh, Esha, thank GOD. I’m so glad you could come on such short notice!” Lara hugged her friend hard.

“Not a problem. What exactly is going on?” Lara’s friend set down her physician’s bag.

“Long story short? Um, my friend Nick has a pretty deep gash on his face, doesn’t want the police to know how it happened, and doesn’t want to go to a hospital.”

“I see. Girlfriend?” Lara nodded in amazement. “Happens all the time.”

“Actually, it wasn’t intentional in this case. He caught the ricochet of a broken plate.”

“Okay.”

“Oh, one more thing.” Lara held onto Esha as she started to walk away. “His face is pretty much a big part of his career. This needs to heal as quickly and neatly as possible.”

“Neat I can take care of. Quick depends on how well your friend takes care of the wound. Where is he?”

“Down here.” Lara led the way, amazed as usual by Esha’s professional manner. They started to turn the corner into the kitchen but Esha yanked Lara back.

“That’s Nick Carter! Nick Carter and AJ McLean!”

“Um…yeah.” Lara blushed slightly. “I told you his face is a big part of his work.”

“No fucking duh!” Esha yelled in a whisper. “Since when do you know the Backstreet Boys?”

“Since a while…Esha, can you scream at me later? Nick needs your help,” Lara said finally.

“You’re right.” Esha composed herself and took a deep breath.

“Nick.” Nick and AJ looked up from their work. “This is my friend, Esha. She’s gonna stitch up your face.”

“Can you make any improvements? I mean, can you fix his face?” AJ asked with a grin. Nick discreetly shot him the finger.

“I cannot improve upon perfection,” Esha said with a small smile and Nick blushed slightly. “Can someone get me a cloth?”

Lara wrung out a clean dishcloth and handed it to her friend. “God, I hate needles. I’ll go clean up in the living room.” AJ dashed out of the kitchen and Lara giggled.

“He has how many tattoos, and he doesn’t like needles.”

“Okay, Nick, you need to follow my instructions to the letter,” Esha told him. As she stitched his cut, she told him exactly how to take care of the injury and keep it clean. “There you go. All done.” Esha snipped the suture and washed her hands. “Want a lollipop?”

“Yes, please,” Nick said, and Esha handed him a green lollipop.

“You were very good,” she said with a grin. “You need to call me,” she ordered Lara, who nodded. “I’ll send my bill,” she said to Nick, smiling again. “See you guys later.”

“Hey, where’d you get that?” AJ asked Nick as Esha went out the front door.

“The doctor gave it to me,” Nick said, sticking out his tongue. AJ pouted.

“I’m gonna go back upstairs and finish,” Lara said. “I’m about halfway done.”

“Okay,” Nick said, serious once more. “We can worry about these things later. Let’s pick up in the rec room.”

The friends worked into the night, and by eleven they had the large house in some kind of clean state. Bags of garbage sat by the back door and bags of Mandy’s things sat by the front door. AJ and Nick flopped onto the sofa in the living room as Lara brought down the last box from upstairs. The phone rang. “I’m up…want me to get that?” Lara asked.

“Nah…hand it here.” Nick flung a hand out. Lara handed him the phone. “Hello?” AJ and Lara watched as Nick’s face turned to stone. Lara plopped down onto the floor near AJ’s legs. “Yes. No, I don’t. Not particularly.” Nick listened for a long time. “No…this time was it. Never again. I’m gonna pile everything in the truck and drop it off. Where are you?” Nick sighed with exasperation. “Tell me the address, Amanda.” He waved his hand at Lara, who ran out to the kitchen for a piece of paper and a pen. She hurried back and he started to scribble. “The apartment number? Amanda, quit playing these games. You fucking DESTROYED my house, you nasty bitch!” Nick screamed. Lara stared at him as AJ grabbed the phone.

“Mandy, you psychotic wench, where the fuck are you?” He snapped. AJ grabbed the paper from Nick and wrote down the rest of the address. “We’ll drop your shit off tomorrow. And if we ever see you anywhere near Nick or his house, I will completely kill you. Understand?” AJ hung up and threw the phone across the room.

“I could have finished that,” Nick said in a dull voice.

“You were getting so worked up I was afraid you’d bust your stitches,” AJ said softly.

“Thanks, man,” Nick replied. He looked around the room, sighing.

“Do you want us to stay with you?” AJ asked. Nick looked at him and shook his head.

“I can’t stay here. I’ll get a room somewhere.”

“No. Stay with me,” Lara said suddenly. “I want you to. I want to make sure you take care of that cut.”

Nick rolled his eyes. “Since when are you a nurse?”

“I am everything to you, Carter. Nursemaid, babysitter, innkeeper. Get some stuff together and we’ll go to my place.”

Nick actually smiled at her authoritative tone. “Yes, Mom.” He slowly trudged up the steps.

“You sure you don’t want him to stay with me?” AJ asked. Lara shook her head.

“If one of the guys would drop by or call, he would feel uncomfortable. I don’t mind having him there for a little bit.”

AJ gave her a hug. “You are a good friend, baby. Why the HELL do you waste time with us when you could get a boyfriend?”

“Why do I want a boyfriend? You and Howie and Nick spend money on me all the time. Howie is kind and tender. You are fun and crazy. Nick is sweet and childlike. Everything I want I have in all of you,” Lara told him with a smile.

“You need someone, though. You need someone to give all this love to. We won’t be single forever, God willing,” AJ said. Lara didn’t reply.

“Okay.” Nick came downstairs lugging a duffel bag. “Let’s plow.”

They went out to the driveway and Nick threw his bag into his car. “You need anything, you call me, okay?” AJ said as he hugged Lara. She nodded. He turned to Nick. “Take care, Junior. I’m home if ya need me.”

“Thanks a lot, Aje.” Nick hugged him fiercely.

“You hungry? I never did get my dinner at the Candlelight,” Lara said as they unpacked Nick’s large bag.

“AJ was gonna take you to the Candlelight?” Nick asked, standing still with a sock in his hand. Lara nodded.

“Yep. Shopping with him was so crazy that I told him my prize had gone up from lunch to dinner as well.”

“Oh, okay.” Nick continued unpacking. “And no, I’m not really hungry.” He yawned big. “I think I’ll take a shower then hit the hay.”

“Bath,” Lara corrected. “Esha said no showers tonight…just a bath.”

Nick groaned. “Okay.”

Lara went to the door. “I’ll be in my room getting ready for bed if you need me.”

“Lara…wait.” Nick went over and stood in front of her. He bit his bottom lip nervously. “Thank you. Thank you so much.”

“Nick, I only did what any friend would have done.”

“No.” Nick shook his head. “You dropped everything to come over there. You started cleaning up, no questions asked. When I said I wanted no police involvement, you went along with it against your better judgement, I know that. Thank you so much.” He pulled her into a hug and kissed her head. “I owe you big.”

“And I will collect big,” Lara said with a grin. “Go take a bath.”

Lara knocked on the guestroom door a half-hour later. “Can I come in?”

“Of course.” Lara opened the door and went in. Nick was shoving his suitcase under the bed. He wore a pair of gym shorts, and his hair was wet and slicked back. “Don’t worry…I basically washed my hair under the faucet.”

“Good boy.” Lara smiled up at him. “Want me to tuck you in?”

“Yes, please,” Nick said with a goofy smile. He jumped into bed and Lara pulled the covers up to his chin.

Lara pushed some hair from his face. “You are way past adorable, you know that?” He nodded and she giggled. He took her hand and kissed the palm.

“Thank you again,” he whispered.

“If you need ANYTHING, you just yell, okay? I’m just next door,” Lara told him. She started to stand up but he held onto her hand.

“Stay here for a while. Please? I feel like a damn baby…but tonight really freaked me out and I don’t wanna be alone.”

“Of course,” Lara said. She reached over and turned out the light, then snuggled down under the covers with him. Nick spooned up behind her, wrapping his long arms around her. He kissed the back of her head and sighed.

“You’re my angel. My guardian angel,” he told her drowsily. He buried his face in her hair and almost immediately fell asleep. Lara lay awake for a while, thinking through the events of the night and wondering what the next day would bring for her friend.

When Lara awakened at nine the next morning, she was grateful to see that Nick was still deep asleep. She carefully unwrapped herself from his arms and snuck out of the room. She grabbed a robe from her room then went downstairs to start coffee. After she had the filter and the coffee in the coffeemaker, she called AJ.

“This is damned important, correct?”

“Good morning, Alex,” Lara giggled. AJ was NOT the morning person.

“Lara?” She heard him sit up. “What is it? Is it Nick?”

“He’s fine. Upstairs sleeping like a baby. Made me sleep with him, but it was okay. He didn’t snore TOO loud.”

“Slept together? You guys ARE hitting it. I knew it,” AJ said with a yawn.

“I swear, the whole idea of me having sex is on your mind twenty-four seven, Alex.”

“No…just sex in general,” he told her. “However, if you would like me to combine the two, maybe you and I could hit it…”

“No, thanks. I couldn’t handle The Alex.”

AJ laughed so hard he began to choke. “No…not many women could,” he finally managed to whisper. “So why did you call then?”

“I want to know what to do next. I need your opinion. I don’t think Nick wants to be alone right now. You know he hates being alone to begin with…that’s why he kept the Monkey Girlfriend around for so long. Should I ask him to stay here?”

AJ thought for a moment. “My opinion? Go back to his place. Offer to stay with him. Wait a few days and say your apartment is getting fumigated or something. He’ll immediately ask you to stay there and then you can keep an eye on him. I’ll crash there for the next day or two…give you time off.”

“Okay. I’ll tell him you called this morning and have him call you later.”

“After lunch, please,” AJ begged, yawning big.

“Okay, Sleeping Beauty. Love you.”

“Back at ya, cutie. Later.”

“Hey,” Nick said sleepily as he wandered into the kitchen around eleven. Lara was on her third cup of coffee, doing the cryptoquote in the newspaper.

“Hey there, baby.” Lara smiled up at him. “How did you sleep?”

“Good…some bad dreams but nothing too bad.” Nick sat down, rubbing his eyes. Lara thought he had never looked more adorable. “I felt so lonely…then realized you were gone.”

Lara blushed. “You just were happy to have the whole bed to yourself.”

“Something like that,” Nick said with his lopsided grin.

“Coffee?” Lara stood.

“Please.” Nick flipped the paper to the sports page as she poured him a huge mug of coffee.

“Oh…Aje called. He has decided to live with you for the next few days,” Lara told him. Nick looked confused.

“Me?”

“Yeah…didn’t say why. My guess is that he wants to take care of you. His turn to babysit.” Lara finished her coffee. “I’m gonna go shower.”

“Lara, wait.” Nick grabbed her wrist as she went by. “Am I that much trouble?”

“You ARE a pain sometimes…” Lara began, then realized he was serious. “Oh, sweetie, no. Not at all. You are worth every second of it when you ARE trouble.”

Nick pulled her towards him until he could lay his head on her stomach. He wrapped his arms around her and gave her a hug. “I love you, Sweet Cheeks.”

“Love you, too,” Lara said. She ruffled his hair then went for the steps.

When Lara and Nick returned to his house around one, AJ was patiently waiting on his front steps. Lara laughed so hard she could hardly get out of the car. Three suitcases and a duffel were surrounding AJ like a makeshift fort.

“How long did you say you were staying?” Nick’s eyes were huge.

“Three days,” AJ said, hopping up and swiping dirt from his backside. “Oh…I have something for you.” AJ put his hand in his pocket and held it out to Nick.

Nick picked up the shining silver key. “Where…”

“She…uh…she stopped by. With some guy in a HUGEASS pickup truck. Took all her stuff, bitched and swore at me, then dropped the key. Actually, she threw it in the shrubbery and I crawled in and got it out.” AJ’s eyes narrowed. “She’s lucky the guy with her was like twenty-five times bigger than me, or I would have smacked her across her ugly monkey face.”

“Monkey?” Nick asked, and Lara choked a laugh into a cough.

“Never mind. Can we go in now? I’m bored out here,” AJ whined.

“Sure.” Nick unlocked the door and tapped in the security code. “Remind me to change this,” he said. “I don’t want…holy FUCK!” Nick ran into the house, followed closely by Lara and AJ. The big screen TV and huge stereo system were in pieces on the floor, and every CD and video was gone.

“Oh, God, Nick…I let her fucking walk right by me! I’m so sorry!” AJ gasped.

“You didn’t know what was in the boxes, Alex,” Lara pointed out. “I packed them.”

“It can be replaced,” Nick said with a sigh. “I mean, I wanted to get a new system anyway.” He ran a hand through his hair and walked out to the back balcony. “Fuck.”

“This is just awful,” Lara said, tears filling her blue eyes. AJ gave her a hug.

“Don’t cry, sweetie. We’ll take care of him. I’ve been doing it for years, and you’ve been doing it for quite a long time yourself.”

“Hey, all, what’s…” Brian froze in the doorway. Kevin was close behind him.

“What are you guys doing here?” AJ almost shouted.

“We stopped by to see if Nick wanted to play ball.” Kevin stared at the floor. “What happened here?”

“Who’s here?” Nick said, wandering back in. “Oh…Kev…Bri…hello.”

“Nick…what happened to your face?” Brian gasped.

“Oh…this…see, Bri, I was born this way…” Nick began with a grin, but he stopped at the anger in his best friend’s eyes.

“It’s my fault,” Lara said quickly. Four pair of eyes looked at her in shock. “We…Nick and I…we had a fight…and I kinda trashed the place, and when I threw a little statue thingy it bounced off the wall, broke, and cut his face. That was yesterday and he hadn’t cleaned up yet…and AJ brought me over to apologize.”

“And I’m crashing here for a few days because they’re painting the living room, and I HATE the smell of new paint,” AJ finished.

Brian looked from one to the other as if watching a tennis match. “You trashed his house?” He snapped at Lara. “I never thought you would do this to him.”

“It’s cool, Bri…honest…” Nick came over and threw an arm around Lara’s shoulder. She was shaking from the pure hatred in Brian’s voice. “We’ve worked it all out…and trust me…I had a lot to do with the situation here as well.”

“Where’s Mandy?” Kevin asked. Lara felt Nick stiffen.

“Gone. We broke up. For good. Why are you guys here, anyway?”

“We wanted to see if you wanted to play ball. But I guess you’re busy here…” Brian trailed off.

“No…he would LOVE to,” AJ said quickly, shoving Nick towards the steps. “Go change. Lara and I will clean up the mess. You should get out of here.”

“Um…okay…” Nick said. “Lara, can you help me carry Aje’s stuff up?”

“Sure,” Lara said quickly. Kevin stared at them but said nothing. Lara grabbed a suitcase and lugged it up the steps after Nick. He grabbed it once they reached the top. He then took her hand and dragged her to the room farthest from the stairs. “Nick, what…”

“Thank you. Oh GOD…I’m so sorry you had to do that.” Nick covered her face with kisses. Lara pushed him back.

“Whoa…Nick…it’s okay…”

“No…you didn’t have to say that but you did and you did it for me and I love you for it. As soon as I’m ready, I’ll tell them the truth…I promise.”

“Nick, I swear. It’s fine,” Lara told him.

“No, it’s not,” he whispered. He cupped her face in his hands. “I love you so much, Sweet Cheeks. You are so good to me. Thank you…thank you.” He kissed her on the mouth before Lara knew what he was doing. She was too shocked to pull back, then she finally made a move to step away.

“I love you, too, Nick,” Lara said weakly. “I would do anything for you…you know that…”

“Yes…I sure do now.” Nick stood in front of her uncertainly, and she could tell he regretted his actions.

“Go get changed. Brian is waiting to kick your ass.”

A bright smile flashed across his face and Nick kissed her cheek as he passed by. “No way. Kick KEV’s ass, maybe, but not mine.”

Lara was alone in the room. She put a finger on her lips, and wondered why her hands were trembling.

When Nick returned to his house three hours later, AJ and Lara were in the living room. There was no evidence anywhere that someone had destroyed his TV and stereo. The room was spotless. AJ was sitting on the sofa, his head resting on the back. Lara was curled up under a blanket with her head on his lap. When Nick opened the front door, AJ’s head popped up.

“Hey,” he said, yawning and trying to stretch without waking Lara.

“Hey yourself,” Nick whispered, smiling as he looked down at Lara. She was curled up like a kitten. AJ carefully stood up, shoving a pillow under her head. The two men tiptoed out to the kitchen.

“Didya win?” AJ asked, pouring himself a glass of water. Nick took the water and promptly dumped it on his sweaty head. AJ growled at him and grabbed another glass.

“Of course.” Nick wandered to the storage room and grabbed a towel. He sat on a chair, draping the towel over his head. “It was fun. It’s not often we can get Kevin out there anymore.”

“How are Lisa and Leigh?”

“Good…Brian didn’t say much but I’m assuming Leigh’s fine. Lisa is at her mom’s with the baby, which is why Kev was free today.”

“Do you want to talk?” AJ asked finally. Nick looked up at him from under the towel.

“Not right now. Soon.”

“Cool.” AJ nodded to show he understood. “Feel like doing anything tonight? Movie? Club?”

“I’m not into clubbing tonight. Could we rent a movie?” Nick asked, then frowned. “Shit…I don’t have a VCR OR a TV down here.”

“That’s what we can do. Let’s shop,” AJ said with a smile. Nick couldn’t help but smile back.

“Any excuse to shop, I swear.”

“We could drag Lara along and listen to her whine. That’s always amusing. That’s what was happening yesterday when you called my cell, actually,” AJ told him.

“You guys have been spending a lot of time together, haven’t you?” Nick asked suddenly. AJ looked at him strangely.

“Either me or Howie. It was kinda nice, actually, since you seem to monopolize her time,” AJ teased gently. “Just kidding.”

“You were gonna take her to the Candlelight?” Nick commented. AJ nodded.

“I thought lunch was bribery enough to get her to go shopping with me, but she upped her asking price after we hit the shoe store.”

“I see.” Nick picked at a fringe on the hem of the towel.

“You okay, Nick?”

“Yeah…” His blue eyes met AJ’s dark ones. “Is there something going on between you two?”

“Between what two? Me and Lara?” AJ’s voice rose to an almost-squeak. “Are you crazy? She’s too smart to go out with the likes of me,” AJ said with a grin. “Anything between us would be like gasoline on a fire, man. Not that I haven’t thought about a little recreational sex between friends, mind you.” AJ thought for a moment. “She does need someone, though…that’s for sure. She all but admitted to me that she hasn’t looked for a boyfriend because she has you, Howie and me. She’s cute, she’s smart, she’s sweet, she’s fun…she needs a man…someone to take care of her the way she takes care of everyone else.” Nick nodded and said nothing. “What makes you say that? And before you ask anything else, I know nothing’s there between her and Howie, either. That woulda happened a long time ago if there was.”

“I dunno,” Nick shrugged. “You guys are just so close lately…like two halves of the same person.”

“That’s because she didn’t have YOU to hang out with lately, buddy,” AJ told him. “You guys have this goofy friendship that I envy.”

“Really?” Nick was amazed that AJ could envy him ANYTHING.

“Sure. You guys can annoy the shit out of each other, then the next minute you are laughing so hard you can’t even stand up. You can tell each other the honest truth and not hurt each other’s feelings, because you know it’s done in love, ya know? You can act like freaking eight year olds, then the next minute you are ultra-supportive of one another.”

Nick shook his head. “No. She supports me. I’m no kind of support to her.”

“Wrong. Who took her gifts and surprises when she had the flu last month? Who held her hair as she threw up the ONE time we’ve ever seen her drunk? You’re supportive in more ways than one,” AJ replied.

Nick shook his head again. “Not where it matters. She always says she’s my babysitter…I think she’s right, and I need to work on it.”

AJ waved his hand. “Don’t worry about it. You know how maternal she is. She babysits us all, even Brian and Kev when Leigh and Lees aren’t around.” AJ looked at Nick for a long moment. “You two are practically dating. You are dating without the physical aspect.”

Nick was shocked. “What? No way.”

“Oh, come on, Nick. You have all the closeness, except you’re not getting your grooves on. Ever thought about it?”

“No. No way.” Nick shook his head vigorously. “She’s not interested in me like that. I couldn’t…I’m not either.”

“You’ve NEVER thought about it. You guys share a bed all the time. She’s never snuggled up against you in her sleep and given you a woody?” AJ raised an eyebrow. Nick’s blush was all the answer he needed. “Thought so. Nick, she is worth a hundred Mandys. Just ask her. Go out, just the two of you, on a “more than friends” outing.”

“No, AJ. There is nothing between us like that, and I’ll thank you to shut your mouth about it.” Nick glared at his friend. “I’m not right for her, and I know she knows it. Let’s work on finding her a new man.”

“Whatever. Don’t think I’m letting this drop, because you know it’s impossible,” AJ retorted.

“What’s impossible?” Lara wandered into the kitchen, rubbing her eyes.

“Nick knows it’s impossible for me not to drag him to more than six places tonight to find him a new TV, VCR and CD system,” AJ told her.

“Oh, no!” Lara whined. “Shopping with you AGAIN?”

Two Days Later

“Time for plan B,” AJ muttered to himself as he watched the clock. It was five minutes before eleven in the morning. “Three…two…”

The phone rang and Nick grabbed it from behind the sports page. “Yo.” He looked at AJ and rolled his eyes. “Hey, Sweet Cheeks. Nah…we’re up. AJ’s snoring can be heard all over the house.”

“Oh, bite me,” AJ snapped, getting up for more coffee. Nick snapped his teeth together a few times.

“So…what’s up?” Nick continued. “No way! That’s awful! Of course…there’s more than enough room for you and Aje here.”

AJ shook his head. “I’m outtie today. The fumes should be gone now.”

“Oh…wait…AJ is outta here today. I want you to stay here. None of that hotel shit. Get your ass over here whenever you want. Okay. Luv ya.”

“What’s up?” AJ asked innocently.

“Lara found all kinds of bugs in one of her closets, so she’s freaking. Wants the whole damn apartment fumigated. So I told her to stay here.”

“Cool,” AJ replied. “I’m gonna go get my stuff together. I’ll probably plow after lunch.”

“Where’s Nick?” Lara asked immediately when AJ answered Nick’s front door around noon.

“On the phone with his mom,” AJ replied. Lara rolled her eyes. AJ stepped outside and closed the door.

“How has he been?” She asked anxiously. She hadn’t been in touch with them much because of extra work that needed to be done on her latest book.

“So-so,” AJ said with a sigh. He walked with Lara to her car. “The mornings are the worst. He like totally mopes around and can’t sit still. He’s good through late morning, afternoon, early evening, then at night he’s miserable again. I’m worried about him, Lara.” AJ’s brown eyes were serious as he picked up her duffel bag. “He’s just so…I dunno…like, vague, or something. I mentioned going out and buying a Playstation Two and he was NOT interested at all.”

“Whoa,” Lara said, and she wasn’t kidding. Nick not being interested in video games was a serious matter.

“Maybe you can help. I’ve tried everything I know how to do. I mean, breakups kill us all, but this goes deeper.” AJ leaned against her car. “I just feel so damn guilty. I mean, I knew that Mandy treated him like shit, breezed in and out of his house, spent his money, insulted him…and I let it go. I am so thankful that she’s gone, but it’s like he’s still acting like she’s around.”

“I don’t know what I can do but I’ll try,” Lara whispered.

“I mentioned that you two would be good together, by the way.”

“You WHAT?” Lara shrieked, blushing.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Lara, face it. You two are as close as any couple I know, except you aren’t doing each other. I mentioned it and he said he didn’t think himself worthy of you, and that he wasn’t good enough for you. Said it would never work…you two were friends.”

“He’s right,” Lara snapped. “Please quit playing matchmaker, Aje.”

“Hey!” Nick said happily as he opened the front door. “It’s Bug Girl.”

“Who started THAT?” Lara asked, trying to keep an angry look on her face.

“He did,” AJ and Nick said at the same time.

“So, how are things?” Lara asked as she washed dishes. AJ had stayed for a light lunch, and she was cleaning up. Nick was seated at the table, finishing up a dish of ice cream.

“Good. Quiet, now,” Nick said with a grin. “AJ is something else. You’d think after touring I would know what it’s like to live with him, but one on one is totally different.”

“I can’t even imagine,” Lara said, smiling back.

“Why don’t you have a boyfriend?” Nick asked suddenly. Lara dropped a glass into the water.

“Where did that come from?”

“Me and Aje were talking. He said that the only reason you don’t have one is that you’re using me, him and Howie as a substitute.”

“That is NOT what I said,” Lara snapped. “I said that you guys are just as good as a boyfriend, without the worry of my heart getting broken.”

Nick brought his dish to the sink. “I thought maybe you were interested in AJ.”

“Aje?” Lara laughed out loud. “He’s my brother…just like you and Howie.”

“Oh…right,” Nick said slowly.

“You three are such a pain in my ass that I don’t need another man in my life,” she continued, giggling.

“I’m sorry,” Nick said, suddenly serious. “I don’t mean to be such a pain.”

“Nick, no.” Lara reached a sudsy hand up to caress his cheek. “You are a welcome pain. I wish all the pains in my life were as handsome and sweet and silly as you are.” She rinsed off her hands and let the water out of the sink. “C’mon. Come help me unpack.”

“Jeez…you and AJ pack like you’re moving in!” Nick exclaimed as he looked at her three bags.

“Shut up,” Lara said. Nick flopped onto the bed to watch her pack. She tossed her cosmetic bag onto the bed next to him. The zipper was open and things tumbled out. Nick began to stuff them back in.

“What are these?” Nick waved a bottle of pills in the air.

“Oh, those.” Lara rolled her eyes. “I’ve had them like over a year and have taken maybe two. They’re sleeping pills, for the nights when my work is driving me mad and I can’t write and I can’t sleep. I try to avoid them. They’re strong as shit.”

“I see. I don’t like the thought of you and drugs,” Nick told her sternly.

Lara laughed. “Like you guys are so innocent.”

“Not the point. You can easily become addicted, and I worry about you.”

Lara’s face softened. “Thank you, Nicky.” She bent down and kissed his cheek. “I worry about you.”

“Don’t worry about me,” he said cheerfully. “Everything will work out before you know it, and you will have nothing more to worry about.”

“God…WHY do you let me watch these things?” Lara sniffed. Nick sat up, grabbed the tissues and handed them to her. “Thank you.” She blew her nose loudly. He looked up at her and laughed. They were on his sofa watching “Steel Magnolias”, one of her favorite movies. She was sitting at the end of the sofa, and he had gradually ended up with his head on her lap. It was their usual movie-watching position.

“You always say that, and you love this movie.”

“Sometimes crying is good. It just releases all the tension I build up inside myself.” Lara looked down at him through her tears, giggling as one of her tears plopped down onto his cheek. “Sorry.”

“No problem.” Nick pointed the remote at the TV and turned it off. “You cry really easily, don’t you?”

Lara rolled her eyes. “You know the answer to that. I cry all the time…happy…angry…sad…it makes me so furious with myself sometimes.”

“I wish I could do that.” Nick took her hand and played with one of her rings. “I can’t. Everything builds up and it seems sometimes the only way I can release it is on the basketball court or at the batting cages.”

“That’s a good way, though. Better you do that then hit someone.”

“You mean like Mandy?” Lara nodded. “She did piss me off sometimes. But it was usually because I was already pissed off at something else. I would never hit a woman…no matter how much of a bitch she was.” Nick looked up into Lara’s eyes. “She hit me, though.”

“What?” Lara whispered. They had all wondered but never had the courage to ask him.

He nodded. “Yeah. Punched me in the stomach a few times…once in the eye…nothing serious.”

“Nothing serious?” Lara repeated, her blue eyes angry.

“Calm down. You’re NOT going to go kick her ass, no matter how good of a babysitter you are,” he said with a small smile, and she smiled back.

“She better never be alone where I can find her…that’s all I have to say.”

“It was more embarrassing then painful. You’ve seen her. She’s little…and I let her hit me.”

“That’s because you would never expect someone you love to hurt you like that, Nick,” Lara replied softly. “No one does. She caught you off guard.”

“Or something like that.” He shrugged. “Maybe I deserved it.”

“No.” Lara shoved him until he sat up. “Do NOT say that, Nickolas Carter. NO one deserves to be abused…except maybe Mandy.”

Nick couldn’t help but smile. “Talk about a double standard.”

“I just…I love you, Nicky. I hate to see you sad, or hurt, or full of stress or anything like that.” Lara reached up to touch his cheek. Nick took her palm and kissed it before she realized what was happening. She snatched her hand back. Her hand felt as if his lips had burned it. He looked hurt. “I’m sorry…I…”

“It’s okay, Sweet Cheeks.” Nick stood. “I’m going to bed. Sweet dreams…and I love you, too.” He bent down and kissed her cheek, then gave her the sweetest smile she had ever seen. “Good night.”

“Good night, Nick,” she whispered, watching the hunched shape of his shoulders as he slowly trudged up the steps.

Lara tossed and turned well into the night. It was almost two when she sat up and realized it was hopeless. She wouldn’t sleep until she figured out what was bothering her. It was Nick. He had innocently kissed her twice, and it had thrown her for some kind of loop. The discussion with AJ hadn’t helped. He was making her think about Nick. About she and Nick. She and Nick? Together? Lara shook her head. It would never work. Would it? She wasn’t interested in him that way.

Lara stared into the darkness. Nick was handsome…definitely handsome. And he had a certain way of smiling at her sometimes that honestly turned her legs to oatmeal. And those eyes…so beautiful…and full red lips…not to mention the gorgeous long body that gave great bear hugs. He was fun, and caring, and sweet…and she couldn’t forget sexy. Holy hell. Maybe AJ was right. Maybe she and Nick DID have something, but they couldn’t admit it to each other.

They needed to talk, she decided. She got up and went out into the hall. She took a deep breath as she reached Nick’s door. She knocked hard. “Nicky? I need to talk to you.” No answer. She pounded. Sometimes he was hard to wake up. “Nick? Come on. Don’t be mad at me,” she begged. She pounded with both hands. “Nick?” There was a frantic tone to her voice now. She tried the knob and found the door to be unlocked. She opened the door and turned on the light switch. “Nick, come on, I…” Lara’s eyes fell to the bottle by the bed. She ran over and picked it up. It was her sleeping pill bottle…except it was empty. “NICKY!” She screamed, shaking the still form on the bed. “Oh God…oh…Nicky…” Her hands shook as she dialed the emergency number. “Yes…I have someone here who overdosed on sleeping pills…” she gave the address and hung up. She quickly dialed again. “Alex? Yes…I know what time it is…it’s Nick…”

Lara insisted on riding in the ambulance with Nick. She held his hand the entire ride and brushed his hair from his face with her other hand. She wept unashamedly, tears spotting the nightshirt she still wore. She had hardly remembered to put on her sandals.

The emergency room nurse kept her behind as they wheeled Nick through some swinging doors and down a long hallway. “I need to be with him. I need to be with him!” Lara screamed, fighting against the woman with all her strength.

“Miss…Miss…calm down!” The nurse snapped, struggling against Lara’s flailing arms. “We need you to contact his family.”

“His family has already been contacted,” a deep voice behind her said. AJ and Kevin stood behind them. “His mother is on her way.”

“C’mon, Lara,” AJ whispered, slowly pulling Lara into his arms. “Let’s sit over here.”

Lara sank onto a sofa between AJ and Kevin. Though she thought she had no more tears left, AJ’s shoulder was soon soaked. “It’s all my fault,” she whispered repeatedly.

“What’s going on?” Brian and Howie burst through the doors. “What’s happening?” Brian all but yelled. “What the FUCK did you do to him?”

“Brian, you need to shut the hell up before I punch you right in the face,” AJ snapped, shoving Lara onto Kevin. “She didn’t do anything.”

“First you trash his house…and now this…what did you do this time? Stab him?” Brian said, ignoring AJ.

AJ’s fist flew out and caught Brian in his finely chiseled jaw. “I warned you, Rok,” AJ growled.

“Stop it…please!” Lara cried out, jumping between them. “You’re friends. Stop it!”

“She’s got you whipped, man,” Brian said to AJ. Everyone in the emergency room was staring at them.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” AJ said, staring at him.

“You guys…I know you two have been hitting it,” Brian said before he thought. Everyone’s mouths dropped open.

“We haven’t been hitting shit, dammit!” Lara got in his face. “I don’t want Alex…I want Nicky!” The words flew out before she could stop them.

“You what?” AJ whispered.

“I want…Nicky…and now…” Lara began to sob again and AJ cradled her in his arms.

“Shhh…baby…calm down.” He glared at Brian. “Lara didn’t trash Nick’s house, Brian. Mandy did.”

“Mandy?” Kevin repeated.

AJ nodded. “She was pissed at all the time he spent with Lara, so he and Lara stopped talking for a while. He finally stood up to the bitch and she freaked. She threw something and when it crashed off the wall, it cut Nick.”

“Then why did you say it was you?” Howie asked Lara. Brian and Kevin had told him the whole story.

“He was ashamed. He wouldn’t even go to the hospital. My friend Esha came over and stitched up the cut,” Lara told them. She looked up at Brian miserably. “I would never intentionally hurt him, Bri. Please believe me.”

“I do. I do.” Brian knelt in front of her and hugged her. “I’m sorry for what I said.”

“It’s okay,” Lara said softly. “I may have killed him anyway.”

“What do you mean?” Kevin asked.

“Before we went to bed, we talked. He mentioned how she had abused him, and just how he felt he wasn’t worthy of anyone. He kissed my hand for some reason and I kinda freaked. He had kissed me before and I freaked then. This was my best friend, you know? Kissing him was odd.” Lara sniffled for a moment. “He went to bed, but before he did, he said I would have no more reasons to worry about him…that it would all be resolved. I should have known.” Lara buried her face in AJ’s shoulder once more. “I realized how much I really DO care about him, and went to talk to him about it. That’s when I found him. He had taken my sleeping pills.”

“Lara, this isn’t your fault!” AJ insisted. The other men nodded. “If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s the psychobitch from hell.”

“Where is he? Where’s my boy?” Jane Carter came flying through the doors.

“You need to talk to the doctors,” Brian told her, giving her a hug. She hurried down the hallway that the nurse pointed out to her.

Lara sighed and leaned against AJ. “I just…I…”

“Stop thinking,” AJ told her. “Relax.”

“I’m gonna call Lees,” Kevin said, standing up. He kissed Lara’s forehead before heading to a quiet corner to use his cellphone.

Two hours later a doctor finally came out to where they had been waiting. Nick’s pulse was weak, his blood pressure low, but he was still alive. He had lapsed into some sort of coma, however, and this was what had worried the doctor.

“Can we see him?” Brian wanted to know.

“His mother is in there now…I don’t think he needs a parade of visitors,” the doctor told him gently.

“Let her go in.” Brian lightly pushed Lara forward. “Please.”

“Are you his girlfriend?”

“Yes,” AJ answered for her.

“Come with me.” The doctor started down the hall and Lara followed him.

Jane looked up as they came in. “Hello, Lara,” she said with a sigh. “This was so fortunate that this happened now. Aaron and I are due in Europe tomorrow, but our flight doesn’t leave until this morning.”

Lara bit back a rude remark. “Go get some coffee. I’ll sit with him.” Jane nodded and left the room. “Hey, baby.” Lara sat in Jane’s vacated chair and took Nick’s hand. He was hooked up to all kinds of machines, and the loudest one beeped a slow heartbeat. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t see.” Tears flowed once more. “I didn’t see a lot of things. I didn’t see how despondent you had gotten. I also didn’t see how much I loved you. How much I DO love you.” Lara brushed away his unruly bangs. “I love you so damn much, Nicky. Not just as a friend. As more. I am so sorry that I didn’t realize it sooner, and that I reacted so oddly when you kissed me.” Lara sniffed loudly. “And they weren’t even serious kisses. For all I know you could just think of me as your older sister.” She looked at him for a long moment, then stood. She bent down and kissed his full red lips. “I love you, Nicky, and I am not leaving this hospital until you wake up.” As Jane entered the room Lara went out to the waiting room, to AJ’s open arms.

An hour later Lisa came flying into the waiting room. “What are you doing here?” Kevin gasped. “Where’s the baby?”

“At my mom’s,” Lisa snapped, annoyed that he would even ask that question.

“We don’t really need you here, Lees,” Kevin said in a kinder tone. “Nick’s still in a coma.”

“I’m not here for Nick.” She made a beeline for Lara. “I brought you a pair of sweats and a tshirt that you left at our place a while back.” She hugged her friend, who began to cry again.

“Oh, Lees,” Lara whispered. “I love him so much.”

“Of course you do,” Lisa said, gently wiping away Lara’s tears. Lara gaped at her. “It’s been so obvious, baby. Obvious to everyone but you and Nick. You guys were MADE for each other.”

“But I may have killed him, Lisa!”

Lisa took Lara’s hand and led her to the ladies’ room so she could change clothes. “Put those on,” she ordered. Lara began to dress, moving in a zombie-like manner. “You and Nick are like two peas in a pod. At first it was friendship, yes, but now you guys are like two parts of the same person…I’ve suspected it but I didn’t want to say anything. And I’m sure you didn’t kill him. His own weakness made him take those pills…and we can just be thankful that he didn’t succeed at his permanent solution to a temporary problem. You need to be strong for him now, okay?”

“He probably hates me…probably never wants to see me again…” Lara pouted. Lisa glared at her.

“Quit feeling sorry for yourself. Nick doesn’t need that right now.”

Lara sighed and said nothing. They returned to the group in the waiting room.

“This is crazy,” Howie said finally as the sun started to rise later that morning. “We don’t all need to be here. I love Nick and all, but waiting here just makes me worry more.” He stood. “Anyone up for a walk?”

“I’ll go with you,” Brian said, standing as well. “Kev? Lisa?”

“How about you?” Lisa turned to Lara, who shook her head.

“I’m not going anywhere.” She stood up and slowly trudged out of the waiting room.

“You guys go on. I’ll call your cells if anything happens,” AJ told them, then headed in the direction Lara had gone.

When he finally found her, it was in the hospital’s chapel. Her head was laying on her arms on the back of the pew in front of her, and her back heaved with sobs. AJ slipped into the pew next to her. “You’re promising Him everything down to your firstborn child, aren’t you?”

“Wh-what?” Lara asked, raising her head. Her swollen eyes were bloodshot.

“You’re promising everything you can think of…you’ll never swear, never have sex, never drink, you’ll give all of your things to the poor, if only He’ll make Nick wake up.”

“Yes,” Lara whispered in wonderment. AJ nodded.

“I did the same thing when Bri had his surgery. You can see how well I’ve kept up my end of the bargain,” he said with a smirk. Lara didn’t smile back. “Lara, if you keep blaming yourself, you will only feel worse. Nick did this on his own. You didn’t make him take those pills.”

“But I…”

“You realized something too late. Nick loves you, yes, but he should have said something sooner.”

“We don’t know if he loves me,” Lara snapped. “I’m just his big sister. I…”

“No…you’re MY big sister, and Howie’s big sister, but you are much more to Nick.” He put his hand on her shoulder. “Trust me.”

“No. I’m never trusting you again!” Her voice rang loudly through the empty room. “It’s all because of you that I even started THINKING about the idea of me and Nicky together…and…and…it’s all your fucking fault!”

“Lara!” AJ feigned shock. “This is a holy place.”

“Then YOU need to get out!”

AJ’s response was to grab her by the shoulders and crush his mouth to hers. Lara struggled to get away but he was surprisingly strong. When he finally released her, her hand flew out across his face. He smiled. “THAT made sense. You were getting hysterical.”

“But…you…how dare you…” Lara reached up and touched her lips.

“Oh, you enjoyed it and you know it.” AJ shrugged and smiled. “I’ve always wanted to kiss you, by the way.”

“Alexander McLean…” Lara was speechless and she couldn’t help but smile. Only Alex would break up an incredibly tense moment by doing something like this.

“That’s better.” AJ put his arms around her shoulders and pulled her tight against him. “Relax, baby. Everything will be fine…I promise.”

They wandered out to the waiting room an hour later, just as everyone returned from their walk. “Any news?” Brian asked anxiously. AJ shook his head.

“No…I…” His eyes lit up. “Esha?”

“Oh, thank God!” Lara ran into the open arms of her friend.

“I was doing rounds when I heard the gossip about a Backstreet Boy being in intensive care. I couldn’t believe it when I saw who it was.” Esha hugged Lara. “Did Mandy make him do this?”

“No,” Lara replied softly. “For once it wasn’t her fault, directly.”

“I’m gonna go see what I can find out from the doctors on call down here. I’ll be right back.” Esha darted down the hallway. She soon returned with a beaming smile on her face. “Good news. While I was peeking into the room he opened his eyes. He’s talking to his mom now.”

“YES!” AJ threw his arms around Lara and kissed her straight on the mouth. This time she didn’t fight it. She was too happy. He then kissed Esha, who froze in shock. “Thank you. Thank you!”

“He’s not out of the woods yet, though it looks like everything is improving,” Esha said when she regained her brain. “The doctor in charge said that he’ll come get you if Nick wants to see anyone.”

“Thanks, Esha,” Lara said, hugging her again. Her friend said goodbye and continued on her rounds.

“Thank God,” Brian said, closing his eyes in a brief silent prayer.

“Amen to that,” AJ added. He hugged Lara again. “See? I told you it would be okay.” Lara nodded but said nothing.

A few moments later a doctor approached them. “Mr. Carter says he’d like to see you. Only two of you at a time, though.”

“We’ll go first.” Brian grabbed Howie and dragged him down the hall.

“We’ll go in next,” AJ said to Kevin and Lisa, motioning to he and Lara.

“No.”

“What do you mean, no?” AJ looked at Lara.

“I don’t want to go. You guys go.” Lara sat down and stared at her fingernails.

“Lara…”

“NO. I don’t want to talk to him.”

“You guys go next,” AJ said to Kevin and Lisa, who nodded. He sat down next to Lara. “What are you doing?”

“He probably hates me, Alex. And what do I say to him? I don’t have a clue. You go in without me.” Her blue eyes were pleading. “I can’t see him right now.”

“Okay…okay, babygirl.” AJ laid her head on his shoulder.

Later that afternoon, after everyone had finally gone home, Lara tiptoed down the hall towards Nick’s room. She had allowed AJ to drop her at her house, but as soon as he was gone, she jumped in her car and returned to the hospital. She peeked in the window of Nick’s door. He was peacefully sleeping, the sunlight from the window glistening off of his short hair. Lara slowly let herself in and sat down next to him.

“You look much better,” she whispered. “More color to your face. Oh, God, Nick…I’m so glad you’re okay.” She sat for a long time, just looking at him. Things raced through her mind, things she wanted to say but couldn’t. Certain phrases repeated themselves in her mind, and when she finally paid attention, she smiled.

“Baby you deserve much better…what’s the use in holding on…don’t you see it’s now or never…’cause I just can’t be friends…baby knowing in the end…” Lara picked up Nick’s slack hand and gently kissed it. “That I will love you more than that…I won’t say those words then take them back…don’t give loneliness a chance…baby listen to me when I say…” Her voice faded off as his blue eyes fluttered open.

“Don’t stop,” he whispered. “Sing the next part.”

Lara blushed deeply but did her best to do what he asked. “There’s not a day that passes by, I don’t wonder why we haven’t tried…it’s not too late to change your mind…and take my hand don’t say goodbye…”

“Have you? Changed your mind?” Nick asked. Lara’s tears dropped onto his hand for a moment before she spoke.

“About us?” Nick nodded. “Yes…I think I’ve fallen in love with you, Nicky. When I saw you there and you didn’t respond when I shook you, I felt as if someone had chopped up my heart. I could hardly breathe…I could not even begin to think of my life without you.” She lowered her gaze. “And if you don’t feel the same I understand.”

He slowly lifted his hand and tilted her chin up. “I love you…I just realized this week how much. I knew Mandy wasn’t right for me…that you were…but you acted like you just wanted to be my friend and…”

“I didn’t know! I didn’t know until that night…” Lara trailed off.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for scaring you…for hurting you. I was so stupid…such a coward…” Nick slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position.

“No…baby…you were hurting. You said yourself that you don’t express it well when you are full of tension and stress.” Lara smiled a little. “Just don’t use this way to express it EVER again, understand me?”

Nick slowly smiled and nodded. “Now what?”

“I don’t know,” Lara whispered. “I’m scared of hurting you again…I feel responsible.”

“You’re not responsible. I am.”

“No, you’re not,” Lara argued. They grinned at each other.

“Some things never change,” Nick said.

“Let’s blame Mandy. I enjoy blaming her for things,” Lara said, and Nick actually laughed.

“They want me in here for a week…suicide observation shit,” Nick told her seriously. “When it’s time for me to come home…will you pick me up?”

“Of course,” Lara said softly.

“And then we’ll talk…for a long time…”

“Okay…” she agreed.

“Did you kiss me…while I was out of it?” Nick asked suddenly. Lara blushed and slowly nodded. “I kinda fell in and out…but I remember that…kinda…” Lara blushed again. “Can you kiss me again? I want to remember it.” Lara sat on the edge of the bed and he put his arms around her. She lightly caressed his face before lowering her lips to his.

“I am so gonna kick her ass if she did something as stupid as Nick did,” AJ muttered as he marched down the hospital corridor. “One whiny suicidal maniac is enough in this group. I’M the one who is supposed to do crazy shit…not them. I…” AJ stopped muttering as he peeked into Nick’s room and saw Lara and Nick wrapped in a passionate embrace. He slowly backed away, and waited until he was down a different corridor before freaking out. “YES!” He screamed, then gave his trademark cackle. He grabbed the closest nurse, gave her a passionate kiss, then took off down the hall.

Lara paced anxiously in the patient pick-up lane in front of the hospital. Her car sat idling behind her. Nick had told her to wait outside for him; he didn’t want her to have to spend any more time in the hospital than necessary. And she had been there a lot. Every day. Kevin, Brian, AJ and Howie had dropped by, and even Leigh and Lisa had stopped by once or twice, but Lara was there from the beginning of visiting hours until the end. Nothing had happened to further their relationship; they just enjoyed being close friends again.

“Hey,” a voice said behind her. She whirled around.

“Hey,” she replied shyly, blushing under Nick’s intense blue gaze.

“You look beautiful.” Her blush deepened at Nick’s compliment. She wore a dark blue short sleeved blouse and white shorts.

“Hardly beautiful. I just threw on what was clean and not wrinkled. You know that’s a feat in itself,” she joked.

“No…you’re beautiful. You’re beautiful every day and I never thought to tell you.” Lara’s face was a flame of red by the end of his sentence. Nick smiled. “And you’re even MORE beautiful when you are blushing like hell.”

Lara rolled her eyes and opened the passenger door. “Your chariot awaits, sir.”

“Can we go get lunch? I’m starving for real food,” Nick said. She nodded as she put the car in drive. “Let’s make a picnic and go to the beach. Please?” He almost begged. Lara looked into his beautiful blue eyes and decided she could deny him nothing when he looked at her like that.

“Thank you…this is wonderful,” Nick said with a sigh, munching on a chicken leg as he watched the waves crash.

“I need to come out here more. I’ve been so busy writing that I haven’t taken time out for me,” Lara observed, reaching over to wipe his face with a napkin. “Messy.”

He stuck his tongue out at her. “I hope I can change that. I’d like us to spend a lot more time together, if that’s okay with you.”

“Of course it is,” Lara said, smiling. “I love spending time with you.”

They finished eating and Nick stood. “Let’s take a walk.” He reached his hand down and Lara took it. He swung their hands between them as they walked at the water’s edge. “I really just wanted to sleep,” Nick said finally. “I couldn’t sleep and I thought the pills would help. Then I realized how easy it would be to just sleep forever…but I fucked that up, too.”

“Oh, Nicky.” Lara stopped walking and took his face in her hands. “I’m so damn glad you fucked it up. I wanted so badly to tell you that I realized I wanted more from our relationship…that I realized how much I truly loved you…and I almost lost you forever.”

“I’m so sorry, baby.” Nick looked down into her troubled eyes. “I just wanted to make things easier for everyone…especially you. You worried so much about me…and all you ever do is take care of me. Now you’ll be more worried than ever.”

“No…not unless you give me reason to worry.” Lara’s thumbs stroked his cheeks. “You must promise me something, Nick. You must promise me to TALK to me. If it’s three in the morning, and you are feeling so miserable you just want to die…you call me, okay?”

“Okay,” Nick said, nodding.

“Say the words. Promise me. Promise me you won’t try to just run away from it, okay? Even if you can’t cry, you need to get it out.”

“I promise. I promise not to hide what I feel anymore.” Nick took her hands in his and kissed her palms. “I feel like kissing you. I want to kiss you and taste your lips and learn your mouth.” Lara let out a whimper and he smiled an evil smirk. “And then…I want to learn them all over again.”

“I’d forgotten what a pervert you can be,” Lara said, shivering as his fingers caressed her neck.

“Pervert? You haven’t seen pervert yet,” Nick said, his tongue flickering out to tease her lips. Lara whimpered again as Nick pulled her body tight against his.

“Nicky…there are people on this beach!” Lara gasped even as she giggled.

“Let them watch and learn,” Nick murmured against her lips.

When they got back to Nick’s house, AJ and Howie were pacing in front of the gate. “It’s about damn time!” AJ snapped. “I have been worried sick.”

“Hey, man, how’s it going?” Howie gave Nick a big hug, then hugged Lara.

“The part of the annoying babysitter will now be played by Alex,” Lara said, rolling her eyes. “Aje, you can’t be worrying about him every little second. He’s a big boy now,” she whispered as she hugged him. “I’m taking care of things. He needs to feel like he’s not being watched. That’s what scared him into all this shit in the first place. He felt he was failing everyone.”

“Sorry,” AJ muttered. “Hiya, Junior. Welcome home. Now let us in cuz I am STARVING.”

“We already ate, Bone,” Nick told him as he unlocked the gate and they walked up to the door. “We had a picnic at the beach.”

“Oooh…romantic…” AJ teased. “Get sand in any unmentionable places?”

“God, AJ…you have a one track mind,” Nick said, blushing slightly.

“Nah…just when it comes to this cutie.” He gave Lara a smacking kiss on her cheek. Nick’s eyes narrowed.

“Hands off, ya freak. This girl is MINE now.” He pulled Lara close and put an arm around her shoulders.

“And it’s about damn time, too,” Howie said. “What’s in your fridge, Nick?”

“Is AJ gonna be on my case all the time now?” Nick asked as Howie and AJ drove away a few hours later.

“Probably. For a while, anyway.” Lara smiled at the face Nick was making. “He loves you, Nick. He worries about you. Just like me.”

“I HOPE he doesn’t love me just like you do, or Alexander and I will be having a little talk,” Nick said, rolling his eyes. “Let’s sit out back.”

They sat down on a deck chair, Lara leaning back against Nick as they reclined. They watched the water in the pool slap against the sides. Lara sighed happily. She hadn’t felt so relaxed or comfortable in a long time. “When did you realize that you…um…that you felt…” Lara stammered. She didn’t know quite how to ask what she wanted to know.

“When my feelings for you changed?” Lara nodded. “Actually, it was the other day when you said that AJ was taking you to the Candlelight for dinner. It sounded like a date and I got SO jealous. Then I was angry for myself for getting jealous, and then I realized how much I really loved you…more than just as a friend. And when I kissed your hand, you pulled back so quick that I thought you could never love me that way, too.”

“I’m sorry, Nicky,” Lara whispered. “It just hit something deep inside me, and I was so confused.” She closed her eyes at the memory. “I had finally realized it, and I wanted to talk to you about it…and that’s when I found you. I was so scared.” She took a deep breath. “But now that doesn’t matter. Now we’re together, and we can find out exactly what’s going on between us.”

“I know what I want to happen,” Nick told her, and she rolled over so she was laying on his chest, looking up at him. “I really want this to work between us, Lara. I mean, we’re so close already…what more is there to being an item? Besides the obvious,” he said quickly, and she laughed. “I would love for you to move in here.”

“Nick…I can’t do that yet,” Lara said, and his eyes grew sad. “Only because I don’t want this to move too fast. I want this to really last. I know you hate to be alone…that you only want to be loved. I do love you, and you are never alone because I am always just a call away. But I don’t want to ruin anything by moving in here so quickly.”

Nick nodded slowly. “I kept Mandy around for just that reason…I hated the empty house. Even though she wasn’t around much…she still came home, ya know? God…I was so dumb.” He looked at Lara for a long moment. “I’d like you to stay here tonight. Could you?”

“Of course, baby,” Lara said softly.

“Good.” Nick pulled her up so she was snuggled against his chest.

The rest of the day was spent getting to know each other in this new way. Kevin and Lisa stopped by with the baby, and Kevin spent most of that time teasing Nick because Lara wouldn’t put the baby down. “You’d better watch it, Nick. In a few months, she’ll be begging for one.”

“I will not,” Lara said, annoyed. “She’s just so beautiful…and sweet.”

“That’s because you’re not sleeping and hearing her cry at four in the morning,” Lisa told her. “But I wouldn’t trade her in for a million hours of sleep.”

The two women took the baby into the kitchen to feed her. Kevin and Nick stayed out in the living room. “How are things going?” Kevin asked his friend. Nick’s face beamed with a huge smile.

“Wonderful. I can’t believe we didn’t try this sooner. It’s like she knows everything I’m thinking before I do.”

“She always did,” Kevin teased. He grew serious. “Don’t rush this, Nick. You and Lara have such a special friendship.”

“I know, Kev. That’s why I never tried anything before this. She’s so great, though, and I think it could really work.”

“…and the words that were coming out of Kevin’s mouth burned my ears, I swear to God,” Lisa was saying as the women returned. Lara froze as Kevin and Nick stopped talking and looked at her.

“What? What is it?”

“Nothing,” the men said together, then laughed.

“Whatever.” Lara ran across the room and threw herself onto Nick, who caught her and groaned.

“You eat too much.”

“You’re one to talk, Heifer,” Lara replied, beginning to tickle his sides. “Yep…I can definitely pinch an inch here.”

“Stop…oh, God…stop it…” Nick said, weakening more by the second. He was dangerously ticklish. “Please…Lara…”

“Some things never change,” Lisa said, giggling as she packed up the baby’s things. “We’ll see you guys later.”

Lara immediately stopped tickling and got up. “I’ll call you.” She walked Kevin and Lisa to the door.

“Bye,” Nick called, still too weak from the tickling abuse he had just endured.

“Later, Nick,” Kevin said with a grin. He kissed Lara’s cheek. “Keep him in line.”

“You know I will,” she promised. She closed the door behind them and turned to Nick, advancing on him slowly.

“No…no…not again…”

“Tell me one good reason why I shouldn’t tickle you to death!” She said, wiggling her fingers.

“Because I’m in love with you,” he suggested, and she froze. He had said he loved her a million times, but this was the first time he had said he was IN love with her.

“What?” Lara whispered.

Nick stood and walked over to her. He captured her wrists in one hand and pinned them behind her back. His other hand reached up to cup her face. “I am in love with you. Totally, utterly, hopelessly in love with you.” His lips met hers tenderly, then with more force. Lara moaned against him and he released her hands. Her fingers moved up to streak through his soft hair, and he sighed against her mouth. When they finally pulled back from the kiss, Nick leaned his forehead against hers. “Whoa.”

“Whoa,” she repeated, then smiled up at him.

“I kinda didn’t pack any pjs,” Lara said as they went up to bed around eleven. She was incredibly nervous and she wasn’t sure why.

“That’s fine,” Nick said quickly and Lara glared at him. “I MEANT that I have stuff for you to wear, you know that. God, I’m not ALWAYS a perv.”

“Just ninety percent of the time,” she said with a grin.

“No. That’s Aje.” Nick dug through a messy drawer and pulled out an extra-large tshirt. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” Lara darted into the bathroom and locked the door behind her.

Nick shook his head in wonderment and changed into a pair of shorts. He normally slept nude, except for when she slept over, and he didn’t feel that he should change anything. He was just happy she was staying over. She soon came out of the bathroom, her hair pulled up into a messy ponytail from when she had washed her face. “You look so cute,” he said, and she giggled with embarrassment. She jumped onto the bed as he went in to get ready for bed.

Lara dove beneath the covers, pulling them up to her chin. She didn’t even know why she was feeling so shy. This was Nick. Her very best friend. That part hadn’t changed. She closed her eyes and forced herself to relax. She was tired. She had not slept well the night before, worrying about picking Nick up at the hospital and how things would be. Her eyes soon remained closed and she dozed off.

“Lara, I…” Nick began as he opened the door, but he stopped when he saw her sleeping in his bed. She looked very tiny in the king-sized bed and he smiled as he looked at her. He leaned against the doorway to the bathroom and just stared at her. He couldn’t believe she didn’t hate him for all the stupid things he had done in the past few weeks. Not talking to her while he was still with Mandy was the biggest mistake he could have made…he had been miserable without his best friend. He knew now, though, that the reason it was so hard was because he had been in love with her even then, not Mandy. He started to walk towards the bed and her eyes fluttered open.

“Hi,” she said softly, her voice shaking. He stopped and stared at her.

“Are you okay?”

“Um…fine…” Lara said, trying to control the tremor in her voice.

“You know what you need?” Nick asked. Lara shook her head and barely had time to hide her face as a pillow came wailing in her direction.

“You are SO dead!” She shouted, getting up on her knees and firing pillows at him. The pillow fight lasted almost twenty minutes, and ended only when Nick had accumulated all five pillows and was laying on them so she couldn’t reach them.

“I win…I win…” he jumped up and did a ghetto booty dance of triumph around the room. Lara laughed so hard she almost fell off the bed.

“Oh God…stop…it hurts…I’m laughing too hard…” she gasped for breath.

“Good. Now maybe you can stop being a chickenshit.”

“I’m not a chickenshit!” She snapped and he raised an eyebrow. “Nothing to be afraid of…just nervous for some weird reason,” she admitted.

Nick rearranged the pillows on the bed and lay down. He threw back the covers so she could climb in next to him. “Come here.” She snuggled up next to him, sighing as her body just seemed to fit right in next to his. “We’ve laid this way a million times, right?” She nodded. “This whole thing is new, yes, but what isn’t new is the way I feel about you. You are like another half of me and it just feels right to have you here. Do you feel the same way?” Lara nodded slowly. “Good. So just shut the hell up and go to sleep. Things will work out.”

“Have you been talking to Therapist Lisa?” Lara wondered.

“No…figured this one out all by myself,” he told her and she smiled. He tilted her face up to his. “Love you, Sweet Cheeks.”

“Love you, too, Nicky.”

Lara woke up at two in the morning because of an incredible sense of loneliness. Nick had rolled away from her and was curled up in a ball on the opposite side of the bed. He was mumbling in his sleep and his body was clenched tight. She laid a hand on his shoulder and he smacked it away. “Go away…” he muttered. “Don’t want you.”

“Nicky, wake up,” Lara said gently, shaking him by the shoulder. He smacked away her hand once more.

“Go away, you bitch!” He snapped. “Let me do this…it will make everything better if I just go…forever…”

Lara gasped and hopped out of bed. She ran around to the other side so she could face him. “Nick. Nicky…baby…please wake up,” she begged. She placed her hands on his face and he shoved her away with a hand on her chest. She hit the nightstand and the lamp toppled to the floor, shattering into three large pieces. Nick woke up and sat up all in one motion.

“What…what happened?” He looked down and saw Lara and the lamp on the floor and his eyes widened. “Oh God…are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Lara said, standing and rubbing her sore bottom. “I'll be fine, Nick. Are you okay?”

“Did I hit you?”

“No…not really…you just kinda pushed me…it’s okay,” Lara insisted, climbing back into bed and putting her arms around him.

“No…it’s not okay…I’m sorry!” He buried his face in her hair. “I was having this dream…Mandy was there…she kept laughing at me and telling me I was a loser and a failure…and I realized the only way to make everyone happy was to just go…” Lara was shocked by the sobs that racked Nick’s long body. She felt his tears in her hair and moved so his head was cradled on her chest.

“Shhh…baby…just let it go…let it out…she’s gone…and you make us all so happy…especially me…” Lara whispered. Nick cried in her arms for over an hour until she was surprised he even had any tears left.

“I’m…sorry…I…”

“Don’t ever apologize to me for crying, you understand?” Lara brought his face up to hers and kissed the last tears away. “Never.”

“I love you…so much…” Nick whispered.

“I love you, too,” she replied. Their lips met softly, then they pulled back. They kissed again and again until they seemed to depend on each other to breathe. Nick’s hands slid up under the tshirt she wore, and she gasped as his hand found her bare breast.

“Oh…God…Lara…” Nick moaned as he shoved the fabric out of the way so his mouth could taste her skin. “Mmm…” he moaned, rolling her nipple around on his tongue.

“Nicky…I…oh…” she gasped for breath as he sucked first one nipple then the other. She yanked at the shirt until it was over her head and on the floor, and they both sighed as their bare skin met.

Nick’s mouth nibbled down her neck to taste the dip between her throat and shoulder. “I want you so bad, baby,” he moaned. “I want to make love to you. But if it’s too soon, I…”

“Oh, Nick…I want you, too,” she whispered. Nick pulled the covers up over their heads, creating a little cocoon that they would not come out of for hours. When they finally surfaced, he held her in his arms and they both had the first good night’s sleep they had had in days.

Lara awakened first, smiling as she smoothed the hair from his face. He looked peaceful and rested, and more beautiful then she had ever seen him. She remembered the tears that had fallen from his gorgeous blue eyes, and was thankful that he was finally able to let go of whatever demons that had possessed him. She burrowed herself back into his arms and fell back asleep.

The End

Tell Lara what you thought of this story!