May 30, 2003

I’ve decided I want to find something new to do for work. It will probably take me a while to get the ball rolling but the thoughts in my head to start doing something about it. I would ordinarily complain about work and how much this and that sucks but rather than do that, and make my time here miserable, I want to find something new. I don’t know… something about serving coffee and making chocolate milk for a 50 year old + man, just doesn’t thrill me. Imagine that. I can’t complain too much, I mean, I’m getting paid well, but it’s boring. I think maybe it would be different if I had a boss who was cheery and happy but as it is, he is cheery and happy and talkative with everyone, but me. Heaven forbid there be a little personal interest invested in the person paid to serve you. Awe well, I just think its time for something new because this new career in coffee services,discreetly titled executive assistant, sucks ass.

May 29, 2003

So, it looks like we are getting another tax cut . WOOHOO! Well, kinda…the link explains it a bit better than my simple mind could. YaY! Boring politics in the bitch journal!! YAY!

May 28, 2003

If you happen to get the latest flu bug, god help ya. It’s the worst. I had a combination of a flu/kidney infection/eye infection. I was all tore up. I felt like someone put a curse on me. Seriously….whatever I did…I’m sorry. It gave me time to rest and think about stuff. I was thinking about how people in my life have come and gone. Friends one minute, topics of old conversations the next. It’s trippy how people fade out or lose touch or stop caring. I think I’m in that boat. I’m kinda apathetic to it all right now or maybe that’s not the right word. I care, but at the same time I think my tank is empty for listening to peoples BS. Once the BS starts, my mind just tunes out. I think I see where I need to improve and be a better person and its annoying to see others who think they are flawless. Stronger because they show no weakness. I think weakness is a part of having character. It shows you’re human. I’m all about that. I think there is a time and place to be strong but with friends you should be able to show your weaknesses and not be criticized for it. I think people who have a hard time admitting they are wrong because they are too proud and strong probably have a hard time admitting they have a feeling of any depth too. It’s all on the surface for them. Anyways….as for the stupid stuff I thought about…I saw an ad for the new reality show Fame . You know that 80s dance show with what’s her name… Debbie Allen. They are going to have this show where she will recruit performers from across the country. I just know it’s a matter of time before we get to watch actual job interviews as reality TV. The show will have some fruity host or fresh faced model and we can all call in on the 800 number to vote on who gets the job. I can just hear the gossip at the office…”Oh my god did you see “Who wants to work?” ...Sigh...I’m really losing it.

May 20, 2003

May 19, 2003

I was thinking about something today and made the mistake of sharing it with my boyfriend who didn’t get my point whatsoever. I was saying how it’s interesting here at work how no one acknowledges birthdays. It wasn’t that I wanted a party or anything. I just think about how I spend 8 hours a day…40 hours a week of my life, with people who could give a shit about me. I don’t even mean it like it sounds. I think that I’m the type of person who is looking for meaning and purpose in life and in what I’m doing. If there isn’t any meaning or purpose to it, my mind analyzes it trying to find logic. I think I am under the evil bible principle of do unto others as you would have done unto you. I buy a card or print out a happy bday sign for a co-worker just to acknowledge the day they were born means something to me. Maybe I read more into crap. I don’t know. I think the people who say they don’t want anyone to know their bday because it’s none of their business are lying. Who wouldn’t want someone to say “hey you know that day you were born? Well I’m glad it happened.” I just think it’s interesting that the people we surround ourselves with either mean something or don’t and why we are such a “who cares” type society. I’m either on a breakthrough to understanding or on the verge of depression.

May 14, 2003

Could I have found the gayest animated birthday graphic? YAY! I’m preparing for the weekend early. Next time I write I will be 28!!! Sigh…

May 13, 2003

I was on my way to work today and saw some shoes on a utility line. I’ve seen this many times but for some reason, today I decided to see what it meant. Urban legends have it variously that shoes dangling on power lines denote where illegal drugs are sold or mark the boundaries of a gang's territory or are an informal memorials to fallen gang members, among other theories. Who knew? Not my suburban raised dumb ass, until now. Oh yeah…I found this other article on water and how much to drink . You know how they say we should drink 8 glasses of water a day? There are some other common myths listed too.

May 12, 2003

You know its real rock news when the fat bald guy with tattoos is telling you what’s cool. I hate this guy. I don’t know why either. I mean…maybe he is a nice guy but he is so damn annoying. Whenever I see him on TV, I feel angry. Hahahaha…Kinda like the way I used to feel when I would hear Offspring or REM every 5 minutes on the radio. I felt like my head would explode if I didn’t change the channel fast enough. Maybe it’s because his name is Ian…no…wait. This guy is cool IANN with two Ns…gay…..I guess this really isn’t another reason why I think MTV sucks cuz it sucks regardless of its VJs.

May 6, 2003

I swear I think the people at my work need a tracking device chip put in or a loud speaker in the men’s bathroom. Whenever one of the big bosses wants to get a hold of an employee, they are, 9 times out of 10, not at their desk. So I get to go on this man hunt for them and usually if I can’t find them anywhere, they are in the men’s bathroom. The one place I can’t go…the one place I’m kind of glad I can’t go, especially with some of the men here. There is also something lacking in phone etiquette with people who have no money or lots of money. There is no middle. I don’t know what it is. The ones with no money call like they have some kind of little dog syndrome and think they are big and the ones with money call and get all rude like I have a crystal ball to know where the hell people are and why they aren’t answering their phones. With all their money, I would think they could get a cell phone that doesn’t cut out and sound like shit all the time. Those are the best calls. When their cell phones cut out, and I ask them to repeat what they just said, They say it louder and ruder. Cell phone users…….I love you.

May 7, 2003

May 6, 2003

I got a glimpse of that show Mr. Personality while flipping through channels last night. The guys all wear these masks . When I saw what they looked like with their masks on I thought they looked like a bunch of slam mans all in a row. Ya know the boxing machine? They should really keep the masks on the whole show...cuz without them its frightening!!! I don’t know, personality is really important I mean, it overrides plenty of physical flaws, but this is reality TV…pretty people TV…Its like reading Snow White fell in love and married one of the 7 dwarfs instead of the prince. Hmmm…now that’s an interesting picture...

May 5, 2003

I had to laugh at this fortune today. I have a life long disorder that makes me tired about 90% of the time to the point where I have to take a little pill everyday for the rest of my life. I love the fortune cookie world!! :) I got this one the last time I ate Chinese...I’m still waiting on my luck to be at a high point. But anyway, the guy here that I call dickboy, now has a cordless headset for a phone so it looks like he is all mental talking to himself as he walks by. Sigh…It’s the small things that make me smile….Since this is Cinco de Mayo, and all I was curious what the day meant. I always thought it was Mexico’s Independence Day but that’s not what it is at all. Here is some history

May 2, 2003

Aww, the joys of the drive thru atm. The fun of waiting behind some jackass who is looking at the machine then looking in his lap, then back at the machine…punching something.. waiting …waiting…getting money…no wait…putting in an envelope then..waiting…waiting…getting money….looking at the machine…looking….got receipt…now sitting ….brakes on….looking at lap….tapping brakes…waiting…waiting…pulling up an inch…staring back at the machine…looking at his lap…waiting…..looking at machine again….moving forward an inch more….stopped....moving up just a bit more.... Ok, my turn…pin…money…receipt…done… Great, Jackass is making a left turn. WAITING!!!!!!

May 1, 2003