1. A lady to sardar "shopkeeper" papeji "LIPTON DI CHAHA" haigi?
   Sardarji: O menu te na hai tenu ho to "LIPAT JA"
2. If any beautiful girl call u BHAI. Then dont take tension bcoz full form of BHAI is "Best Husband Among Indians". So just go and propose!
3. Raat khamosh hai, Chand madhosh hai, kho raha hosh hai, na tera dosh hai na uska dosh. Jaag re pyare, jara underwear to dekh, yeh swapndosh hai!
4. Chameli to Vajapayee: Ae saab kya irada hai, chalna hai kya?
   Vajpayee: Dekho chameli chalne ki baat mat karo, ghutno me dard hota hai...
5. A newly wedded sardar asks his mom: How shud i do it? Mom: put ur hardest thing where she pass urine. sardar puts his head in TOILET!
6. A new wife has 3 qualities - Economist in kitchen, artist in home, devil in bed.
   After a few years she is artist in kitchen, devil in home and economist in bed.
7. Sardar: Kaash khuda ne mainu brush banaya hunda ta main tere mu vich firna si. Sardarni: Thoda vada banaya hunda te tu flush vich firna si..
8. Nashe se koi devdas hogaya, to koi paise se kangal hogaya.. to koi pyaar me pagal hogaya kya aap mere ko msg bhejte bhejte barbad hogaye?
9. Jab jab ghire badal, teri yaad aai, jhoon k barsa sawan, teri yad ai,
   bheega main phir teri yad ai,kyo na aye yaad, tune chatri ab tak nahi lotai.
10. Rich man to very poor man.. How come you have got such a BIG PENIS?
    Poor man: Coz when i was a little boy i had NO other TOY to PLAY with.
11. Allah ke naam pe,maula ke naam pe, tere biwi bachhon ke naam ne, papi pet ka sawal hai. koi mere is msg padne waale ko paise dedo, yeh mujhe msg nahi karta.
12. Mayawati came 2 laloo's house with a Goat. Laloo askd: iss bhens ko mere ghar kyo layi?
    Maya: dikhta nahi, bakri hai? Laloo: Hum bakri se hi pooch raha hu!
13. Galat nazar se dekhoge to har jagah kharabi lagegi.. aur sahi nazar se dekhoge to har sundar ladki tumhe bhabhi lagegi. - Tumhara SMS Bhai
14. India ko azad hue 57 saal hone wale hai, phir bhi no progress. Kyonki aaj bhi india ki bholi gawar sab chhod kar mere SMS padh rahi hai..!!
15. A new wife has 3 qualities: economist in kitchen, artist in home, devil in bed.
    After a few years she is artist in kitchen, devil in home and economist in bed.
16. Q: What is the name of the bank opened by a marathi maanus in memory of his great grandmother?
    Ans: Aai Chi Aai Chi Aai (ICICI)
17. Sardar was writing a letter. Friend: kise khat likhte ho? Sardar:Apne aapko
    Friend:kya likha? Sardar: muje kya malum? Muje abhi mila thodi hai!!
18. 1 Sardar: oye yaar, maine MANMOHAN SINGH ko subah main kabhi nahi dekha. 2 Sardar: abe gadhe, woh din me thodi dikhega woh to PM hai, AM thodi hai.
19. What is an unreasonable demand?
    Ans: 2 Negroes standing in front of a white wall n asking for a colour photograph.
20. Boy & Girl in a party. Boy: How many sister brother u r? Girl: 6
    Boy: parents ko aur kaam nai tha kya? Girl: wht abt u? Boy:1 Girl: baap may dum nai tha kya?
21. NEW GUJJU FILMS:
    1. Halo maro jalo. 2.veer loda walo 3. bobla ma dhaya samata nathi 4. land gayo pardes 5. uchi piki na nicha bhav 6. land sahiba na boble.
22. Sangita: Azhar, admi ki midal stump me aur cricket ki midal stump m farq kya he? Azhar: kuch farq nahi he ek ko hare gaas me dalte he to dusre ko kale gaas me!
23. This SMS is strictly intended 4 smart & cute readers. since u recieved it, there must be a Technical Error 4 which the sender deeply apologises. So pls delete it.
24. Kachi keri paki jay ane paki keri khari jay.. chodva vada chodi jay ane ghelchoida rahi jay.
25. Boy1: kyu re LADKI patana kaisa chal raha hai? Boy2: kya batau, sali GIRLFRIEND movie ne to ladkiyo ka taste hi change kar dala hai.
26. Sardar nadi kinare chal raha hota hai, aur dusre kinare par khade sardar se puchta hai, main uss par kaise aau? 2Sardar idhar udhar dekhke: TU USS PAAR TO HAI!
27. Bolaa dukaan-daar, ke kyaa chahiye tumhain. Jo bhii kaho ge merii dukaan per wo paoge maine kahaa ke kutte ke khaane kaa cake hai bolaa yahiin pe khaaoge yaa leke jaaoge!!!!:?
28. Couple in art gallery c painting of a woman coverd with leaves.WIfe moves but hubby keeps lukin. She asks"wat r u waitin 4? Hubby: Autumn
29. Ek totle ko intervew mein 4 word institute,aptitute,magnitute, and subsitute bolne ko kaha. Totla bola: inkichut, aapkichut, maakichut, sabkichut!!
30. Uchi medi ucha mol, jangyo utari piki khol, bobla tara dol m dol, sitha tara zol m zol, gaande che nani bakhol, lodo porvu pol m pol..
    Forward this to all!
31. Friendship is like susu in the pants. Everyone else can see it but only you can feel the warmth, thanks for being the SUSU in my pants!
32. PREMI: Tum mujse sadi kab karogi? PREMIKA: jab mere parivar wale man jaye tab! PREMI: Tere parivar me kon kon he.
    PREMIKA: Mera pati or 3 bachhe!
33. A sardar and a girl were having sex suddenly sardar asks: Do u have AIDS? Girl: NO. Sardar: Thank God, i dont want to get that again!
34. Dekhne me CHIKNI ho, badan SILKY ho, Breast MILKY ho, pehni BIKINI ho, Neche uske MAKHMALI ho Lamba apna DANDA ho, usme jake hi THANDA ho!
35. A priest saw a girl removing blouse.He prayed,God plz close my eyes.When he opened his eyes girl was naked.
    Then he prayed, GOD NOW PLZ U CLOSE UR EYES.
36. Ek Ladka train me ladki se takraya.. Ladki boli tum aadmi ho ya JAANVAR? Ladka: Nahi ji.. JAAN to aap hai hum to VAR hai..
37. Customer: Iss kaanch (Mirror) ki guarantee kya hai. Shopkeeper: 100 feet ki uchai se fenko to 99 feet tak kuch nahi hoga!
38. What is the HEAVIEST and the LIGHTEST thing in this world?
    HEAVIEST: sperm, even Hercules had to drop it.
    LIGHTEST: Penis even imagination can lift it!
39. Sardar returns book to library, bangs it on table and says:
    Too many characters, no story at all!
    Librarian: So u r the one who took the telephone directory!
40. Father: my 5 year old son is very naughty.
    He made all our female servants pregnant!
    Doctor: how? Father: He took a pin & pinched holes on all my condoms!
41. 11girls asked 4 11 bananas from banana seller. Seller: Main darjan hi bechta hoon. Ek ladki ne kaha: lele yaar, ek kha lenge!
42. Your network tariff has changed! Call charges r now calculatded according 2 brain size. The smaller the cheaper! Congrats U can make free calls!
43. Woman says 2 chemist:DO u keep XXL size condoms? Chemist: Yes madam,Wud u like to buy it? Woman: no, but i will wait here for the buyer!
44. Man 2 salesgirl: my wife needs a bra bt i dnt know size. Girl: touch my breast n try 2 calculate! Man: oh i 4got she needs a panty too!
45. A penis is a gentleman, when it sees a lady, it stands. It also an artist. Aftr evry per4mance, it bows. It is also gossipper, it goes from mouth 2 mouth!
46. A girl asked my bike for a ride, I gave her, after one hour she returned my bike and started vomiting. PULSAR DEFINITELY MALE!!!
47. Boy: Yeh tumhari dono tango ke beech kya hai? Girl: Bus aise hi LAKIR hai. Aur tumhari tango ke beech yeh kya latak raha hai? Boy: Yeh bus uhi LAKIR ka FAKIR hai.
48. Boy: kash main teri chaddi hota to teri CHUT se chipka rehta.. Girl: Soch le chutiye, main kisi aur se CHUDA rahi hoti aur tu kisi kone mein pada rehta!
49. What is short but gets longer when U hold it? It passes between women's breasts, and enters into A hole? What is it? A car seat belt. U Vulgar mind!
50. HU sugandh majani ne tame vas cho, hu varas anokhu ne tame adhik mas cho, hu dudh madhur ne tame khati chaash cho, hu het haiya nu ne bhaisab tame moto tras cho!

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