All this was written recently by YOURS TRULY...I didn't bite it off of anyone. It's all mine. So there. And enjoy!!
Now see this one standing alone
She almost looks sad, but then she looks down
She sees her two angels laughing at something
That she can't comprehend
And it makes her smile, and that smile lights up her face, and then the room, and then the world
And she looks your way and you feel something
While this woman may not be seductive and heart-stoppingly gorgeous
You desire her more than the other
The one who twists your viriginity
And kisses your soul
And caresses your heart harshly
And although this girl is not the most beautiful woman in the world
You long to take her and hold her and make her yours
That girl over there
The one that can light up a room with her warming, comforting presence
She would take your virginity, and hold it to her heart and let it become part of her
She would kiss your soul lightly and make it less sinful
She would caress your heart with real love
That girl over there...
She is not a girl
She is a woman
Words
Evil, cold, often worthless
If I took these away, how would you tell me what you felt?
With words come lies, with lies come pain, and with pain comes hate
I will take your words from your lips
and place them by my pillow for safe-keeping
I will keep these words,
The words you mumble so half-heartedly to me
Mostly lies, bittersweet stories that have burst forward
from your vividly beautiful imagination,
meant to entrap me in your exhalted fantasy land
where you can do no harm,
where all is well,
where nothing you say can be held against you
Those harsh, unfeeling, foolish words you allow to tumble from your luscious lips
that wrap around me and make me see what is not real
Eyes, they express so much
Yet they can still lie to the one who looks in them
They can still see right through love and find a way to hurt
If I took these away, how would you lie then?
You would have no words
And you would have no eyes to avoid my hurt stares that I cast upon your angelic face
When I catch you in a lie
I will take your eyes,
and place them by my heart for safe-keeping
so that they may see inside me and know what you have done to me with those words that I keep next to me
on my pillow
No longer will you be able to spill forth oceans of words that are nothing but hollow lies,
empty promises,
and slowly splintering dreams
Last, I take your soul
That thing you have let become black with selfishness and skin-deep desire
The thing that barely exsists, and is as thin and slight as a whisper
I take this and I place it under my pillow
where it may have the oppurtunity to grow stronger
Where perhaps it will gain a little bit of depth
and you will then gain a little perspective
I place all these things next to me on my pillow
and then I look at you lying next to me
I have taken away your words that are meaningless
Your eyes that are full of blank stares
Your soul that is in such need of healing
You are beautiful now,
you are quiet, for you have no words,
and gentle for you have no harsh, stone cold eyes,
and peaceful for you have no disturbing soul
As you lay there on your pillow
And I lay here on mine
I like to hope that soon the sour traces of our relationship
will vanish
and I will no longer be burdened with questions
I will no longer have to ask myself why we fell apart
I will no longer have to ask myself what I could have done to change things
I will realize that we fell apart because we were never together
I will realize that I couldn't have changed what didn't want to be changed
I tell myself often that soon, your image will be nothing
Your angelic face will be nothing but a childhood dream;
a dream that was unusually tangible, and frighteningly real
I tell myself that I will soon stop thinking of you
and that you will soon be just another person wandering around the earth that we share
And I like to believe that in time,
when I have removed the last picture of you and I from the wall
and washed everything so it no longer smells like your designer imposter cologne,
that I will finally be able to breathe in.
I will finally be able to accept what happened.
I will finally be able to let us vanish
He watches her discreetly as he plays with his silk tie
His shoulders slumped,
he looks away
before she can catch his eye
He strolls in very casually as he glances all about
His head held high,
he's sure to get
all that he wants, no doubt
Some ladies watch him obsessively, as they toy with dainty lace
So charming
and so wealthy
and a very handsome face
Other ladies watch him disdainfully, as he walks by with a wink
What a snob!
A fool, a moron
The other women think
So as the silly ones get swept away by his charm and handsome sight
the proud ladies know
they'll be dancing with
the honorable men tonight
Memories
I got to the mailbox expecting a letter
But of course I never find one there
And I wonder why he took you from me
I guess destiny wasn't meant to be fair
And the choir won't sing
And the bells never ring
And the angels don't seem quite as heavenly
But now it's too late
And I can't wait
Till I have you, and not just sweet memories
My Mistake
Written for Jordan
It's getting quite annoying to continuously have your silly friends pester me
"Yes we're broken up," I say
"Why?" they say
And I just shrug and tell them to ask you, seeing as how it's your fault we are now two, and not one.
But according to you, this is MY mistake
I am also fed up with your staring across the room at me
Especially when I turn to look back, and you whip your head around,
pretending to be interested in your chemistry book
when everyone knows, my dear, that you are failing chemistry with flying colors.
Oh, but your failures MY mistake, too, I suppose
And most of all, I am annoyed by the fact that you and I seperating permanently
has caused a great damper on what was once a beautiful friendship
A friendship where you would throw ice down my shirt
and I would make faces at you during football practice so you'd fall down
A friendship where we'd talk for hours before realizing
we're going to see each other in Algebra first period anyway for heaven's sake
But wait...our non-exsistent friendship...
and our pleasingly bitter break-up
is once again...
as always...
MY mistake
What if I had told him-would my lips be burning on top of his?
What if I had told him-would I be whispering in his ear?
What if I had told him-would I be holding on to his shirt for comfort?
The sweet scent of an untasted love that leaves me wondering
What if?
That beautiful song I hear when I'm all alone that sings to me
What if?
The air around me that makes me cold at night whistles to me
What if?
What if I had told him-would I be smelling his sweet scent while I held him?
What if I had told him-would I be singing to him in his sleep?
What if I had told him-would he be keeping warm despite the chilling air?
The air, the sea, the songs of gentle rain
The perfumes, the unspoken whispers, the unwoven fabric of a love that may never be discovered
They all haunt me...
But more than anything the burning of my lips still longing to say what I feel...
And not just what if
Why do you hurt her again and again when you know your promises are nothing but lies?
Does it bring you laughter to see so many tears?
Why must you steal kisses and give none in return?
Does it excite you to watch salty rivers flow until they are finally run dry?
Why do you hate until you can hate no more-why must you torture her with your mind games?
When will you be satisfied?
Now you sit here by yourself, and she is gone now, for you have driven her away
What are you thinking now?
Do you still reach for her in your sleep and realize it is only her pillow?
Do you still look through old photos and let your too-late tears spill onto her sweet caramel cheeks?
Do you still keep the spare key under the mat in case she decides to come home?
She has left you, like you told her to so many times before
And yet you cry and scream her name
Aren't you ever satisfied?
You're just conceited-so vain
It drives us all insane
Kinda sad you have such shallow, empty dreams
You're so pathetic-such a shame
You make us so insane
What a waste of life, to be not what you seem
It feels so wonderful when I can break you down
Into tears and you're crawling on the floor
Oh come on reach for me, you're shadows close behind
I'll kick you both without a feeling of remorse
Every inch of you is petty wasted life
I'll whisper words that'll make your whole face burn
You've done the same to me, just because you could
That doesn't matter now, cuz I get my turn
You're conceited-so, so vain
And it drives us all insane
When your body breaks, the rest of you will, too
You're pathetic-such a shame
God, you're drivin me insane
How's it feel to finally hear something true?
I had this dream and there was singing
It was sweet and powerful and put the soul at ease
It floated and whispered like a summer kiss
And caressed the body like a soft spring breeze
I had a dream and stars were shining
Like a million diamonds emblazened up above
And they twinkled like a river lit by the moon
And gleamed like the promise of a new found love
But when I wake up and look outside
The clouds are grey; the sun's behind them somewhere
So I close my eyes and imagine
The perfection of a world that'll never be there
I know things are a little bit awkward
I know things are just a little bit strange
But I don't want things to get all crazy
And I don't want one thing to change
I'll play my part if you play yours
And I'll catch you if you fall
Cuz even though I'm still hurting
I don't love you any less at all
Maybe it didn't work out exactly how I'd planned
That doesn't make me less of a person, or you less of a man
I won't feel sorry for myself, and you won't feel guilty
We'll just forget this ever happened, and go back to where we used to be
I know things are just a little bit different
Now that you know, and I know too
All I can say is that these things happen
And there's not much that I can do
I'll do my thing and you do yours
But if you're hurt, by your side is where I'll be
And if I promise to support you always
Will you do the same for me?
So, no, things didn't work out just how I wanted them to
That doesn't mean you turn away from me, and I turn away from you
I won't stop caring for you, please do the same for me
And then we can just get back to where we used to be
...You got me back
All safe and sound
And you said you'd try harder to be around
But here I am
And where are you?
Doing the same things you used to do
So I scream inside
Feeling my body ache
You can't take back this kind of heartache
I need you with me
I need you near
But you can't even see me when I'm standing right here...
...Six months is gone
Nothings changed
Although the furniture has been re-arranged
The rug shampooed
New books on the shelf
But I'm still here all by myself
And as I look at
The pictures you hung
I wonder how the lies taste on your tongue
The new TV
The brand new car
The plants with leaves shaped just like stars
But where are you?
Hell if I know
Probably off putting on some big show
So I sit here
In my corner and cry
And think of another way to say goodbye...
...Your last chance
You blew that too
No time for me, well here's something for you
I'll be gone
You'll have no one to reject
And you'll feel sorry for all that neglect
In the living room
With white carpet
Think of how nicely the stain will set
You'll see me here
Who'd have thought
This is the daughter that you forgot
You'll hold my hand
But it's too late
Guess you shouldn't have gone on that dinner date
I raise the gun
I think of you
And all things we'll never do
We never did
We never will
Put my graduation pictures on the windowsill
We won't cry
At my wedding
You won't get to hear my choir sing
We won't kiss
We won't hug
Till I spill my pain on to your rug
But the phone rings
I should take this call
My last words before I end it all
It's some guy
He sounds concerned
And as he speaks, my face burns
They found you in
a bathroom stall
Lifeless up against the side of the wall
They found some pills
That's what you took
"Was there a note to me," I ask, "or did they look?"
He said no
I take a breath
Mama, you never fail me, even in death
Hang up the phone
My mama's died?
I'm all alone?
I've no place to hide
Couldn't even be with me
Never tried
Mama you didn't even see
My own suicide
It's nice to hear you care so much, even while you're showing me you don't
Even while you contradict everything you've told me, it's great to know that you'd never intentionally hurt me
Doing it accidently is just so much better
Because when it's just an accident you can sugar coat it
Give it kiss
And blame it on me
I'm thrilled that you care about me, and if I don't think so
Well, maybe I should rethink things
No, I think I should try to remember why I'm still trying
Hanging around
Letting you hurt me over and over
And biting my tongue while wiping my tear stained cheeks
Because it doesn't seem so bad
When you sugar coat it
Give it a kiss
And say you love me
I'm overjoyed that you can just brush this off
and not worry about how I might be feeling
Just so long you still have all those females that whisper those fabrications
and say they care about you
and they love you
and here I sit feeling sorry for myself
waiting to hear the things I've imagined your lips saying to me
crying on my own shoulder
while I'm let down again
but you still sugar coated it
Gave it a kiss
and handed it to me
I'm thrilled to know that you can share your feelings with everyone but me
but you still love me
and care about me
and enjoy my company
and I make you laugh
and you'd never hurt me
but I can't help but wonder...
Did you sugar coat all that too?
And then give someone else a kiss?
And forget about me?
But it's still nice to know you care