Customs official: Do you have anything to declare, sir?
Uncle Avi: What should I call you? Bullet? Tony?
Bullet Tooth Tony: You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.
Brick Top: Do you know what "nemesis" means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this instance by an 'orrible cunt... me!
Turkish: Fuck me, hold tight. What's that?
Brick Top: In the quiet words of the Virgin Mary... come again.
Turkish: [making tea] Would you like sugar?
Turkish: Did you understand one word of what he just said?
Avi: I'm gettin' heartburn. Tony, do something terrible.
Mickey: I bet ya can box a little, can't ya sir? Aye, you look like a boxer.
Bullet Tooth Tony: Boris the Blade? As in Boris the Bullet-Dodger?
Avi: Fish, chips, cup o' tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary-fucking-Poppins London!
Turkish: You show me how to control a wild fucking gypsy and I'll show you how to control an unhinged, pig-feeding gangster!
Vinny: Why are we stopped here? Whats wrong with that spot?
Vinny: I thought you said he was a getaway driver. What the fuck can he get away from?
Bullet Tooth Tony: There are two kinds of balls in this world. There are the big brave balls and then there are the little mincey faggot balls.
Brick Top: If I throw a dog a bone, I don't wanna know if it tastes good or not.
Uncle Avi: Should I call you Bullet? Tooth? vBullet Tooth Tony: You can call me Susan if it makes you happy.
Tommy: Who took the jam outta your doughnut?
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