A League of Their Own

A League of their Own

(Ernie sees Dottie and Kit vigorously milking cows.)
Ernie Capadino: "Ow! Doesn't that hurt them?"
Dottie Hinson: "Doesn't seem to."
Ernie Capadino: "Well, it would bruise the hell out of me."
Dottie Hinson: "Who are you?"
Ernie Capadino: "I'm Ernie Capadino. I'm a baseball scout. I saw you playing today. Not bad, not bad. You ever heard of Walter Harvey, makes Harvey bars -- you know, the candy?"
Dottie Hinson: "Yeah. We feed them to the cows when they're constipated."
Ernie Capadino: "That's the guy. He's starting a girls' baseball league, so he can make a buck while the boys are overseas. Wanna play?"
Dottie Hinson: "Huh?" Ernie Capadino: "Nice retort. Tryouts are in Chicago. It's a real league, professional."
Kit Keller: "Professional -- baseball?"
Ernie Capadino: "Mmm-hmm. They'll pay you 75 dollars a week."
Kit Keller:" We only make 30 at the dairy!"
Ernie Capadino: "Well then, this would be more, wouldn't it?"

Kid: "What's your rush, dollbody? What do you say we slip in the back seat, and make a man out of me?"
Dottie Hinson: "What do you say I smack you around for a while?"
Kid: "Can't we do both?"

Announcer: "Well, bite my butt and call me an apple!"

Jimmy Dugan: "Are you crying? Are you crying? There's no crying in baseball."

(Meeting after almost 50 years)
Older Dottie: "You haven't changed one bit."
Older Ellen Sue: "Dottie, I married a plastic surgeon!"

(Last line)
Umpire: "Yesterday that might've been a ball, tomorrow it might be a ball, but today it was a strike!"

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