THE FACULTY

The Faculty

Stokely: I'm not sticking that hack-drug up my nose. It's so 80s.
Zeke: Aliens are taking over the world. Weigh it.

Delilah: Casey, when did you become Sigourny Weaver?

Coach Willis: You're not much into sports.
Casey Connor: I feel that a person should run only when he's being chased.

Casey: Everyone's been acting really weird, especially the faculty.
Stokely: Tell me about it, it's like they've all turned into fucking pod people or something.
Casey: Into what people?
Stokely: Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Small town gets taken over by aliens. ...That was a joke.

Casey: You're not buying this, are you?
Stokely: No, I'm not... but it's kinda cool.

Delilah: Are you hitting on me, Casey?
Casey: No, I was just saying you can be pretty cool sometimes, this not being one of them.

Stokely: I used to think the only alien in this high school was me.

Zeke: What are we going to do?
Stan: I could call my dad, he'd know what to do.
Casey: If he's really your dad.
Stan: You're right.

Stokely: Body snatchers is a story somebody made up, dingus. It's located in the fiction section of the library.
Casey: Yeah, so is Schinder's List.

Zeke: This where I get my equipment.
Marybeth: You borrow it from science labs?
Zeke: I like to think of it as stealing actually.

Delilah Proffitt: Then leave Stan. Why are you hanging around? Go and pulitzer.
Stan: Oh blow me Delilah, 'cause i'm sick of your shit.
Delilah Proffitt: Go and get the fuck out of here and take your little freak-dyke with you.
Stokely: Fuck you titbags.

Marybeth: What happens at the end of all those stories? How does Invasion of the Body Snatchers end?
Stokely: They get us. They win. We lose.
Marybeth: Maybe we really win, I mean Stan didn't look unhappy.
Stokely: That's because that wasn't Stan, they took away who he was.
Marybeth: Maybe they just bettered who he was. Cleared away his confusion. I know you pride yourself on being the outsider, but aren't you tired of pretending to be something you're not? I know I am.

Stokely: Is this usually the point where someone says let's get the fuck outta here?
Stan: Let's get the fuck outta here.

Stokely: So they've just been setting us up over the years with their E.T.'s and their Men In Black movies, just so noone would believe it if it ever happened.
Casey: I think so.

Ms. Burke: I'm sick of you, little boy! And if I have to see you peddling your little wonder dust again, I'm gonna shove my foot so far up your ass, you're going to be sucking my toes 'til graduation.

Casey Connor: It must really blow being you.
Stan: You have no idea.

Casey Conor: You can be such a...
Delilah Proffitt: What?
Casey Connor: Pretty cool human being when you aren't being a first class grade A bitch.

Stokely: Bi-polar bitch.

[Stokely kisses Stan]
Stokely: I just didn't want to never have done that.

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