THE AMERICAN PRESIDENT

The American President

Andrew Shepherd: I want to buy her some flowers. That's what men do when they break a date.
Robin McCall: That's not what men do. I know no men who do that.

[Ushering Sydney out of the White House after spending her first night there.]
Andrew: I'm sorry about this. We'll do it better next time.
Sydney: Well, I'm no expert but I think we did it pretty good this time.

Lewis: Can I just state very clearly I can't be part of anything illegal.
A.J.: Good for you, Lewis.
Lewis: You can say what you want. It's always the guy in my job that ends up doing 18 months in Danbury minimum security prison.

Lewis: Who're we calling, sir?
Andrew: I'm calling the organization of the United Brotherhood of It's None of Your Damn Business, Lewis. I'll be with you in a second.

Beth: You kissed him? Where?
Syd: On the mouth.
Beth: No, where in the White House?
Syd: The Dish Room.
Beth: The Dish Room?
Syd: The China Room.
Beth: And then what happened?
Syd: He had to go and attack Libya.
Beth: It's always something.

[Dancing at a state dinner.]
Sydney: I don't know how you do it.
Andy: It's Arthur Murray. Six lessons.
Sydney: That's not what I mean. Two hundred pairs of eyes are focused on you with two questions on their minds: who's this girl, and why is the President dancing with her?
Andy: Well, first of all, the two hundred pairs of eyes aren't focused on me. They're focused on you. And the answers are Sydney Ellen Wade, and because she said yes.

President Andrew Shepherd: You want free speech? Let's see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil who is standing center stage advocating at the top of his lungs that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours.

President Andrew Shepherd: You're attracted to me, but the idea of physical intimacy is uncomfortable because you only know me as the President. But it's not always going to be that way, and the reason I know that is there was a moment last night when you were with ME, not the President. And I know what a big step that was for you. So, Sydney, I'm in no rush. Here's my plan. We're going to slow down, and when you're comfortable, that's when it's going to happen.
[Sydney emerges from the bathroom wearing nothing but one of his shirts.]
President Andrew Shepherd: Perhaps I didn't properly explain the fundamentals of the slowdown plan.
Sydney Ellen Wade: [feeling the bed] No, you explained it great.
President Andrew Shepherd: Are you nervous?
Sydney Ellen Wade: No.
President Andrew Shepherd: Good. My nervousness exists on... several levels. Number one, and this is in no particular order, I haven't done this in a pretty long time. Number two, uh, any expectations that you might have, given the fact that I'm... you know...
Sydney Ellen Wade: [approaching seductively] The most powerful man in the world?
President Andrew Shepherd: Exactly, thank you. I think it's important you remember that's a political distinction; it comes with the office. I mean, if, uh, Eisenhower were here instead of me, he'd be dead by now.

Sydney: Mr. President, you've got bigger problems than losing me. You just lost my vote.

[Discussing a reprisal for an attack on US troops.]
A. J. MacInerney: Sir, it's immediate, it's decisive, it's low-risk, and it's a proportional response.
President Andrew Shepherd: Someday someone's going to have to explain to me the virtue of a proportional response.

President Andrew Shepherd: What I did tonight was not about political gain.
Leon Kodak: Yes sir. But it can be, sir. What you did tonight was very presidential.
President Andrew Shepherd: Leon, somewhere in Libya right now, a janitor's working the night shift at Libyan Intelligence headquarters. He's going about doing his job... because he has no idea, in about an hour he's going to die in a massive explosion. He's just going about his job, because he has no idea that about an hour ago I gave an order to have him killed. You've just seen me do the least presidential thing I do.

Lewis Rothschild: You have a deeper love of this country than any man I've ever known. And I want to know what it says to you that in the past seven weeks, 59% of Americans have begun to question your patriotism.
Andrew Shepherd: Look, if the people want to listen to---
Lewis Rothschild: They don't have a choice! Bob Rumson is the only one doing the talking! People want leadership, Mr. President, and in the absence of genuine leadership, they'll listen to anyone who steps up to the microphone. They want leadership. They're so thirsty for it they'll crawl through the desert toward a mirage, and when they discover there's no water, they'll drink the sand.
Andrew Shepherd: Lewis, we've had presidents who were beloved, who couldn't find a coherent sentence with two hands and a flashlight. People don't drink the sand because they're thirsty. They drink the sand because they don't know the difference.

Sydney: How do you have patience for people who claim they love America, but clearly can't stand Americans?

Lewis: Mood swings? Nineteen post-graduate degrees in mathematics, and your best explanation for going from a 63 to a 46 percent approval rating in five weeks is mood swings?
Leon: Well, I could explain it better, but I'd need charts, and graphs, and an easel.

[President Shepherd watches his opponent's campaign ad.]
Andrew Shepherd: Wait, wait, here comes my favorite part.
Bob Rumson: My name is Bob Rumson, and I'm running for President!
Andrew Shepherd: Sure glad he cleared that up, 'cause those people were about to buy some Amway products!

President Andrew Shepherd: America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship. You've got to want it bad, because it's going to put up a fight.

President Andrew Shepherd: The symbol of your country cannot just be a flag. The symbol also has to be one of its citizens exercising his right to burn that flag in protest. Now show me that, defend that, celebrate that in your classrooms. Then you can stand up and sing about the land of the free.

President Andrew Shepherd: Is the view pretty good from the cheap seats?
A.J.: What?
President Andrew Shepherd: Because it occurs to me that it twenty five years, why have I never seen YOUR name on a ballot? Why A.J.? Why are you always one step behind ME?
A.J.: Because if I wasn't, you'd be the most popular history teacher at the University of Wisconsin!
President Andrew Shepherd: Fuck you!

Lucy: If you were a dork you should say you're sorry. Girls like that.

[Sydney is unaware the President is listening.]
Sydney: Your boss is the chief executive of fantasy land!
President Shepherd: Well, let's take him out back and beat the shit out of him!

President Shepherd: We had a nice couple of minutes together. She threatened me, I patronized her. Didn't have anything to eat, but I thought there was a connection.

A.J.: You've said it yourself a million times. If there had been a TV in every living room sixty years ago, this country does not elect a man in a wheelchair.

President Shepherd: This is NOT the business of the American people!
A.J.: With all due respect, sir, the American people have a funny way of deciding on their own what is and what is not their business.

Syd: The President must think I'm a third-rate jerk!
Beth: No, if he thinks you're a jerk, I'm sure he thinks you're a first-rate jerk!

Syd: I don't know what happened. One minute I was calling him a mockery of an environmental leader, the next minute I had a date.

Robin: I think the important thing is not to make it look like we're panicking.
President Shepherd: See, and I think the important thing is actually not to BE panicking.

A.J.: Excuse me, Mr. President, I just got off the phone with the federal mediator in St. Louis. Management just walked away from the table; the baggage handlers, pilots and flight attendants are all getting set to walk out in forty-eight hours. President Shepherd: You know, I studied under a Nobel Prize-winning economist, and you know what he taught me?
A.J.: Never have an airline strike at Christmas?

President Shepherd: Listen, I feel terrible, but I'm going to have to cancel our date tonight.
Syd: Another woman?
President Shepherd: No, I got to go to St. Louis to avert a massive airline strike.
Syd: Boy, if I had a nickel for every time I've heard that one!

President Andrew Shepherd: The White House is the single greatest home court advantage in the modern world.

President Shepherd: She didn't say anything about me?
A.J.: No, but I could always pass her a note before study hall.

Robin McCall: It's Christmas.
Lewis Rothschild: It's Christmas?
Leon Kodak: Yeah. You didn't get the memo?

President Andrew Shepherd: I've loved two women in my life. I lost one to cancer and I lost the other because I was too busy keeping my job to do my job. Well, that ends right now.

Leo Solomon: Politics is perception.

A.J. MacInerney: If anyone needs me, I'll be in the Roosevelt Room, giving Lewis oxygen.

A. J. MacInerney: Oh, you only fight the fights you can win? You fight the fights that need fighting!

Lewis Rothschild: I question my loyalty all the time.

Lucy Shepherd: Do you see it as part of your job to torture me?
President Andrew Shepherd: No, just one of the perks.

A. J. MacInerney: Oh, and Leon, don't be the nice, sweet guy from Brooklyn on this one. Do what the NRA does.
Leon Kodak: What, scare the shit out of them?
A. J. MacInerney: Exactly.
Leon Kodak: I can do that.

Sydney Ellen Wade: I regrouped. You have to give me that. I stood in the middle of the Oval Office and made it clear that he who doesn't take the GDC seriously does so at his peril.
Beth Wade: And then you walked out the wrong door.
Sydney Ellen Wade: Are you going to keep throwing that back in my face for the rest of my life?
Beth Wade: That's my current plan, yes.

Lewis Rothschild: I tell any girl I'm going out with to assume that all plans are soft until she receives confirmation from me thirty minutes beforehand.
Robin McCall: And they find this romantic?
Lewis Rothschild: Well, I say it with a great deal of charm.

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