Great Rhetorical Questions

For your entertainment!!!

When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow, only to be troubled and insecure?

What's another word for synonym?

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why do they report power outages on TV?

What should you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

Would a fly that loses its wings be called a walk?

If a car carrier truck crashes, is it a multi-vehicle accident?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off?

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong?

If a turtle loses his shell, is it naked or homeless?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

When you're sending someone Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

What is the speed of dark?

Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's?

If women wear a pair of pants, a pair of glasses, and a pair of earrings, why don't they wear a pair of bras?

How come you never hear about gruntled employees?

What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

How can there be self-help groups?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Where are Preparations A through G?

What happened to the first 6 "ups"?

Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't live there?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

Given an infinite number of geeks at an infinite number of Star Trek conventions, would there be at least one with a life?

If a thing of beauty is a joy forever, why does ugly seem to last so much longer?

If Mike Tyson bites off Jesus's ear in a fight, is it a foul or a sacrement?

Why aren't the Toronto Maple Leafs called the Maple Leaves?

If the shortest distance between two points is a line, why does waiting in line take so long?

If a monk, living in a monastery, takes a vow of silence, and then talks in his sleep, has he broken his vow of silence? If so, who is going to tell on him?

 My wife asked me, "If you could know how and when you were
           going to die, would you want to know?"  
                  I replied, "No." 
       She said, "Okay, then, never mind."