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G.M. stands for Get Me

Submitted by
Andy Knipe to
championyankees.com
  July 2nd, 2004
Columns:

A Little Pedro Rant

» G.M. stands for Get Me

The Curse of the Bambino

More Columns...

"We want a pitcher not a belly itcher".
It's shopping time folks and pitchers, the great ones and good one's are wanted. G.M.'s sniffing around 1st place, longing for the aroma of dirty water dogs mixed with autumn air permeating throughout their imposing edifices are breaking out the shopping lists and shopping carts.

The first name that comes up is Randy Johnson. The second? George Steinbrenner.

Everyone automatically assumes that when the Yankees need some new part, MLB factories send em' what ever they need to complete the mad construction, no questions asked. People think that if Randy Johnson's ripe for the taking, boss-man Steinbrenner and brain trusted Mr. Cashman can steal him away from Arizona easier than plucking a Grape from the fresh fruit section.

Randy's not being traded? The Evil Empire will get Freddy Garcia. If the Bombers want Kris Benson, or Al Leiter, they get both. They loathe the Yankee brass for getting A-rod. Theo Epstein and the Boston bean counters wave the red flags like Luke Skywalker waves his light-saber. They complain and scream "dirty pool" the Boss's way...when they in fact try imitating the style they so despise.

When Boston went after Jose Contreras, two years ago, they went as far as to rent every deluxe suite, superior ocean view with a garden terrace hotel room in the Dominican Republic. All, just to deny the Yanks from getting their Cuban right-hand-man. Larry, John and Theo also bought out every B&B, 2 star motel, colossal Mosquito infested tenement, and giant Banana leaf shanty - just incase George was willing to go to the ends of the Caribbean to one up Boston.

Guess what? The Yanks got him. Maybe George is waving the white flag at 28 of the 29 other owners willing to take Jose. Everyone but John Henry is eligible to talk trade with Georgie-boy. Despite great stuff Contreras is nothing more than this years Jeff Weaver...And look how the Bombers parlayed that dunsky into Kevin Brown.

The Yanks will get another arm even if Brown and Mussina are fine. Just don't be surprised when its not Randy Johnson or Freddy Garcia.

NEWS FLASH...Randy and his mullet are staying in the nice dry heat at the BOB. Freddy Mercury to the Bronx might be more alive then Freddy Garcia to the Bronx. Not because the Yanks can't get him, they can. Brian Cashman just may be pulling a bigger rabbit out of his hat. The one no one's talking about.

Some how, someway some G.M. will have his pockets picked by Steinbrenner - partly because he has Postseason Traumatic Stress Disorder (Theo included but not the one). Now add the fact that everyone wants to be a Yankee... Eventually. Ok...ok...I know…not Griffey...not Schilling...not yet

...One way or another they'll end up there because George wants them. Other owners and G.M.'s deep down admire George. They talk about him in their winter meetings like he's the spoiled rich girl from the Willy Wonka movie...

"I want it now daddy, I want it now"
".....yes Veruka, what ever my baby wants....."

I got news for you. There other owners richer than the Boss. Huge corporations too cheap and stupid to give their fans what they want...to win.

It's just like Willy Chee-chee laid it out for a Senate sub-committee in Godfather 2...

"When the boss say's to push a button on a guy, I push a button on a guy."

Willy looks more like a nerdy buffer these days, trading in the leather sport coat, Raybans and porn stache for a golf shirt, round glasses, packin' a 28 caliber cell phone.

Start dialing G.M.'s, Brian Cashman has call waiting.



Written by Andy Knipe for championyankees.com
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May not be copied without the consent of
The Unofficial Website of the New York Yankees

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