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Two Guys and A girl

Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives.
The one guy says, "I'm a YUPPIE...ya know, Young, Urban, > Professional.
>The second guys says "I'm a DINK...ya know, Double Income
> No Kids."
> They asked the woman, "What are you?" She replied: "I'm a WIFE...
> ya know, Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc."
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> This woman goes into a funeral home to make arrangements for her
> husband`s funeral. She tells the director that she wants her husband
> to be buried in a dark blue suit.
> He asks, "Wouldn`t it just be easier to bury him in the black suit
> that he`s wearing?"
> "No," she insists as she hands him a check to buy one. "It must be
> blue."
> When she comes back for the wake, she sees her husband in the coffin
> and he is wearing a beautiful blue suit. She tells the director how
> much she loves the suit and asks how much it cost.
> He says, "Actually, it didn`t cost anything. The funniest thing
> happened. As soon as you left, another corpse was brought in, this one
> wearing a blue suit. I noticed that they were about the same size, and
> asked the other widow if she would mind if her husband were buried in
> a black suit. She said that was fine with I switched the
> heads."
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
> Here's the Quotation for Wednesday, April 21, 1999
> The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less
> than you settled for.
> ~ Maureen Dowd ~
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> And now for the dry puns of the day...
> Two silkworms were in a race. They ended up in a tie.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Little Johnny was in his math class one day when the teacher
> singled him out.
> "If I gave you $200," the teacher began, "and you gave $50 to
> Mary, $50 to Sally and $50 to Susan, what would you have?"
> "An orgy," Johnny answered.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> I have one recipe for the Drink?off challenge. It looks promising. I am
> waiting for the rest of the recipes I was promised. Well, WHAT ARE YOU
> WAITING FOR??? These need to be tested, aged & perfected before I can
> release them for the July 4th party. I guess we will have to go with
> Bacardi
> 151 on the rocks. (An old favorite of mine) Let's get a move on. Time is a
> wast'n!
> Ciao,
> Sal