"But the ship was now in
the midst of the sea, tossed with waves; for the wind was contrary.
And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the
sea...Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not
afraid...And when they (Jesus and Peter) were come into the ship, the wind
ceased." Matthew 14:24,25,27,32
Our losses and the grief associated
with them are as storms about us. Storms keep us inside, hinder us
from going out and accomplishing our normal activities. Storms sometimes
cause great damage. Our homes may be damaged, personal property may
be damaged, beauty may be turned to ugliness and destruction, soil may
sink or be moved far from it's original location. Usually, at least
in our area, the destructive winds are cold. Storms also cause fear.
Grief is similar to storms.
Grief hinders our normal routine and activities. All the parts of
our daily life that touched our child's life are not disrupted. When
no children are left or when it was one who had been in need of lots of
care, our daily routine is greatly affected. Many mothers question
their worth after such a loss. Just as storms can damage homes, so
does grief assault a home - each individual grieves differently so misunderstandings
arise. It's easy to think others aren't hurting as badly as you are
because their expressions of grief are so different from your own.
Remember the same crisis affects people differently. Grief causes
us to feel as though the ground beneath our feet is unstable, just as storms
cause landslides, sinkholes, or erosion of roadbeds and foundations.
Grief assaults us similarly. If we're not firmly grounded in the
Lord during our ordinary days, when the storms of grief assault us, we
may find out path washed out and need to lay a new, firmer foundation to
support ourselves and others as we work through our grief to healing.
Grief affects how we view life.
There may be beauty all around us but we can only see the areas affected
by grief's stormy gale.
But back to the passage in Matthew,
in the midst of the contrary winds, late in the night, Jesus came.
I'm quite certain the disciples felt forsaken, fear had no doubt engulfed
them, wondering if they'd see land again. Then in the depths of darkness
- Jesus came.
How many of us have felt abandoned
by our Heavenly Father in our grief for a season. We can very much
identify with the disciples out in the boat on the stormy sea in the darkness.
Grief causes us to heave fears we never experienced previously. We
may feel abandoned by God and others. Our boat seems too feeble to
endure the storm of grief we're in. The darkness seems impenetrable.
Then...Jesus comes. We may not feel much change - the storm is still
assaulting us, our boat is still churning, the darkness is still very thick,
the winds are very cold, but we sense He is aware of our situation.
He gives us some encouragement by sending along a friend or some comfort
concerning the one(s) who died. In the midst of the storm we're encouraged.
Eventually there comes the time when
Jesus gets into our little ship with us - and the storm ceases then.
For each of us, this time is different and circumstances are never the
same for two of us. But as we let Him, Jesus will come and be with
us in our grief.
It may feel good to wallow in our
self-pity, after all, look at what we've been through and no one else seems
to be feeling sorry for us. When we dwell on our pain constantly,
we don't leave room for His healing help in our lives. We have to
make room for the Lord in our grief for Him to come quiet our turbulent
waters.
"Behold, I stand at the door, and
knock; if any man hear My voice, and open the door, I will come in to him,
and will sup with him, and he with Me." Revelation 3:20 Sometimes
we are so overwhelmed in our storm of pain and suffering that we
can't hear the Lord knocking at our door, longing to come in to comfort
and encourage us, lighten our load, and bring light to our darkened path.
Let us seek, in the midst of our
storm of grief, to remember this passage in Matthew. Let us look
for the Lord in the midst of the darkness, when the night seems so long
it is overwhelming. He may not cause the storm to immediately cease
(as in this passage, His presence was there, yet it wasn't until He came
into the boat that the storm ceases) but just being aware of His concern
and love and presence will help make the waves of grief more tolerable.
Let us never forget that He has engraved us upon the palms of His hands,
our walls (all the things that would hem us in and circumstances which
seem so insurmountable) are things the Lord is aware of as spoken of in
Isaiah 49:16.
