Top of PageMost of my hard work finally paid off yesterday morning in Philadelphia. Our SIFE team became Regional Champions for the 6th straight year. We are now headed for Kansas City on May 12th. I am very excited, but I am not ready for the stress of another competition. It seems that something always goes wrong and this time it was all computer problems. Luckily enough they were not as serious as they could have been and they were quickly fixed. I still somehow managed to lose two pages of our PowerPoint presentation, but luckily they did not make or break the presentation. I am just glad that the first round is over and we can concentrate on efforts on winning in Kansas City.
Classes are almost over for the term, and actually I only have two classes left before finals. I have been behind in doing work for class due to all of the computer work for SIFE, but I am slowly catching up and learning the material for my finals. I have been lucky in the fact that most professors did not give work that needed to be handed in. I would have really gone crazy then. Slowly I am de-stressing and sleeping more than 2 hours a night. Next year there will be someone helping me with everything because it is way too much for one person to handle. Although it is nice to be the only one to take credit for everything that was done and how nice it looks. The compliments have really helped me feel as though I really helped out the team.
Spring break is in less than two weeks and I cannot wait to be lying on the beach. It will be nice to spend a week with friends and not have anything to stress about. It will be the first vacation that I have taken with just friends and I am excited just to chat and catch up with all of them. I just hope that it is sunny and hot the entire week.
Some people have really bothered me lately. It is so amazing how arrogant people can be and not even think twice about it. Also it is amazing how quickly people forget all of the nice things that you have done for them in the past. What good does criticizing other people really do? Does it make you feel somehow superior to them or better than them? I just do not get it at all. I like to think that there are not many people in the world that I truly hate, but those people I do hate really make me mad. Just think about the things that you say to people or about people because is it really worth it in the end? As a good friends states, will it really matter in a month or a year? So even though I cannot say these things to the people that really deserve to hear it, I hope that it opens up people's eyes.
Why is the world filled with such hate? What did I ever do to certain people to make them have such a grudge? I have started to stop worrying because to me those people do not deserve my time. I was nice enough to give them the time of day at one point in time, but they truly turned their backs on me. People are very ungrateful in this world! It angers me greatly, but I can only do my best to make sure that I am grateful to those around me. I am only one person, but it is important to get my opinion heard somehow.
So basically what I am trying to say is, thank you to those who have stood by me no matter what has happened in my life. To those of you who turned your backs, you were never worth my time anyway. Next time really think about what is important and how you would want others to treat you!
Back to my work so I can catch up. Venting really helped tonight, and if anyone is questioning if this is about you, maybe you should take a longer look at how you treat others. If you have questions, ask or e-mail me. Until then, take care.
Top of PageI find myself back in front of this computer just staring and wondering what I want to do right now. The term is almost over (one more class tomorrow) and I really do not have much work. Thinking about finals just stresses me out, so I choose to think about many other things instead. I will start studying on Saturday, and since that is two days away, I do not have to worry about it now.
The Academic Honor and Recognition Banquet is tomorrow night. I officially become the Finance Board Vice-President during the banquet, and I do not know why I dread that so much. I was really excited about it at first, but now I realize just how much I have become involved with for next year. I thought I never had time this year; well next year is only going to be worse. It is my senior year and I would like to enjoy it rather than have it fly by while I am too busy to notice. Thinking about the friends I will lose this year just makes me want to be with all of my friends all that much more. I take it for granted that they live a few floors down or across campus, and in the next few years, who knows how far apart we will be. How sad is that to really think about!!! I hate change, and I am not ready to deal with some of these new changes.
So another sad thought for the day that I have tried to forget, but how can you forget when the date is so imprinted into your mind?? Granted I have moved on with my life, it is still difficult to look back and think what might have been. Two years from this date was supposed to be my wedding day and now I find myself alone without that special person to love. Not that I mind being alone it is just the fact that I miss the little things and the happy memories. Those times have made me who I am today and changed my outlook on life. So even though today will not be celebrated as our five-year anniversary together, I still look back and think of the times we did spend together. I hope that you are in a happier time in your life and that you are loved. I am sorry that things could never work out between us and we could never be friends, but I wish nothing but the best for you. I hope that you only remember the good times and special moments. Always remember the certain special things... "Chances are I'll see you somewhere in my dreams tonight. You'll be smiling like the night we met. Chances are I'll hold you and I'll offer all I have. You're the only one I can't forget. Baby, you're the best I've ever met." May it always make you smile and remember the night we met.
It is nice to take a moment to remember some of the good memories in life. It was a fun period in my life, but I am beyond that point now. I do not regret that it ever happened or how things have turned out. Everything happens for a reason, and I am happy for the time I had you with me.
To completely change the topic, I bought a new cell phone today. I needed something new that would be useful on the trip to Hilton Head. I love new toys! : ) Other than that, I went tanning today and burned myself pretty good. I also found out my floor assignment for next year, and the good news is that I no longer have to live in heaven. I will be on the 3rd floor of Tower B next year. Some of my sister's friends are living on that floor so it should be a fun time!
I suppose my room could use a good cleaning and there is some homework to do. I may be back later if I get to thinking too much. Until then, take care.
Top of PageJust another night on duty in Towers. It is amazing what people actually do when they are drunk. It is almost 3:00 AM and I am exhausted, but I thought I would write briefly to clear my mind.
Tonight was the Academic Honor and Recognition Banquet, and it went really well. People keep commenting to me that my name was called for every other thing they were announcing. It did seem as though I was standing an awful lot, but it shows how much I have accomplished in the last year. I feel as though I have made some sort of impact on this school in my own little way. Now I am officially a part of the executive committee that runs the school. How scary of a thought is that?!?!
While I was helping to set up for Casino Night tonight, I had the opportunity to have a long talk with David. It made me feel so much better just to explain my frustrations with everything around me. He talked me through some points of confusion and made me feel a lot better about some of my decisions in life. I know that some of the decisions I will be making in the next few days are going to possibly upset some people, but I am sick of the way certain things are going. I will not be a friend when it is suitable for certain people because that is not a friendship. What is the point of working at trying to be friends if only one person actually cares! Since I am that one person and when I stop caring, the friendship will disappear within a week if not a couple days. Obviously it is not a strong enough friendship anyway.
So I am going to bed with a smile on my face after listening to David's voice mail again. I need sleep in order to make it through this busy weekend along with a week of finals next week. So until the next entry, miss me as usual! : )
Top of PageI have been back here at school for two days now, and I have been running around constantly. I have not had a chance to sit down and think about my next move. Break was so relaxing that I wish I was still on the beach and away from all of the stress of school.
Glad to say that I went to Hilton Head Island, South Carolina for Spring Break 2002. I shared it with some great friends and my sister. We had some drama on the way down. We were about an hour and a half south of Elmira when Meredith's car overheated. We took it in to a repair shop to see what they could do, but they told us that it was closing time and they would get to it first thing in the morning. So we stayed in a hotel and went to bed early. The next morning we returned to find out that the car could not be fixed until Monday. So we put our heads together to figure out what to do. We figured out that it would be easier to have my sister drive down to where we were and continue on from there. So, my sister had an unexpected vacation on the beach. It was a ton of fun and I miss laying on the beach!!!
Off to softball practice, but I will write more tomorrow when I have more time. Oh... who has practice outside from 10:00 - 11:30 PM when it is freezing!!! My coach of course : (
Top of PageI finally have a few moments to sit down and write a few more things on my mind. This is supposed to be a fun term and so far this week I have been running around all day. I have not been able to get much done as far as things that I would like to do. It seems that I must do what everyone else needs before I can ever think about myself. I guess that is just life.
So Julie and I are kind of living together again. She is student teaching and needs to have a quiet place to sleep. I offered her my other bed, so she has been staying here all week. It is fun to have a roommate again. Plus it is forcing me to go to bed early along with her and sleep is definately a good thing! The other reason she is staying here is to watch over me and make sure that nothing happens. I have been having problems with my sugar and the doctors all think that I have hypoglycemia. On Wednesday May 1 I will be going though several different tests to see what is really going on. For now all I can do is eat 6 small meals a day and stay away from sugar. Unfortunately I am not allowed to drive since I have been blacking out a lot, so I feel even more helpless. I just want things to go back to normal so I can drive and eat M&Ms again.
We had our first two softball games last night, but we lost both of them. We were winning the first game, but they came back and tied it in the last inning. We ended up losing in overtime. I did not play until the second game and before that I had a sugar attack. That was not fun at all, but I still did well in the game. I had at least two RBIs. We were supposed to have two more games tonight, but it was raining all morning. I am actually glad that we have a break. Only two more games tomorrow and the season is over!!
Off to SIFE rehearsal yet again this week. We need to make this perfect before we leave, so I guess I do not mind all of the rehearsals. Oh check out the SIFE website off of the Elmira website soon, I have been doing quite a bit of updating. Well, I am late, so I better run.
Top of PageI have not been feeling like myself lately because I have a cold or something that I just cannot shake. It probably has something to do with my nerves as well. I am honestly scared to death for these tests tomorrow. Needles and I do not get along very well, and tomorrow I have tests that I have never heard of before. Robin has agreed to go with me and keep me company. I just hope they find out what is truly wrong so I do not have to go through any more tests!
It has been great to have Julie staying here with me. Not only do I have someone to talk to at night, I also have someone who makes me go to bed at a reasonable hour. Even though I have been tired because of this stupid virus, it has been nice to sleep at least 9 hours a night.
I just got my pictures developed from Spring Break and they are so much fun to look at. It reminds me how fun and relaxing that trip really was. I hope that next year we all do another trip, but this time I want it to be to someplace new and exciting.
Nothing too much is going on in life other than waiting impatiently for these blood tests to be over. Class is a lot of fun and we have already made a telescope and a mount. Tonight we are doing our first night observation with the telescopes, and I hope that it is a lot of fun. We have been rehearsing at least twice a week for SIFE competition. I have made some minor changes to the presentation, but nothing major. We have a very good chance of placing higher than we did last year! I cannot wait to get to Kansas City and be among all of the excitement of competition again.
Not too much to report on the relationship issue. I have been talking to an old friend again, and we hope to get together sometime in the near future. Not jumping to any conclusions yet. We will just have to see how things turn out, if they work out. More on that later I suppose.
Well, I am just going to go relax. Tomorrow is Wednesday, so that means no class!! So until the next time... take care.
