My Poems & Thoughts
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My Poems & Thoughts

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All Poetry And Thoughts Copyright 1999

This first poem is/was dedicated to Babydoll..

Lost running free
just wishing you'd catch me again
but suddenly I feel as though
that cant possibly be
my words have scorned
burned deep in your mind
forgiveness isnt what I ask for
all I ask is you will still hold me tight
still love me
when all I can do is cry
wishing I could fight
but I can not for I am weak
rather then hold what I want
I set it free
and stay in my misery
to scared to show I really care
because maybe by then you will no longer feel
for my claws have scratched
and cut you open wide for the world to see
and I can not mend thee
I cry inside for what I have done
but my pride is to strong
I wish you knew what you meant to me
though I am sure it is still a mystery to you
sleep is impossible
tormented by my own thoughts
someday wishing to be free
but as the days pass by
all I see is just more lost memories
wishing times I could go back
undo the wrong I have done
but once done
there's no turning back
eternity of just hurtful memories
I took your heart
and squeezed the life from it
yet you still continue to love
when there wasnt a heart left
lost in confusion
how could this be
that one could really love me
the poison in their cup
the tainted red lips they still continue to kiss
the trembling hands they hold
the darkened soul they embrace
for how could they love such a decrypted thing

I watched my life slip from my hands
I look up to the heavens above and pray
that what I feel wont last long

The pain you feel today
will still be there tomorrow
closing your eyes today will only make it grow stronger

To know me is to love me
to love me is to hate me
to hate me is to see through me
to see deep down inside where all the pain lays

you loved me today
you'll be gone tomorrow

"No Different"
I sit here teary eyed
my heart weighing heavier by each passing minute
words you once spoke so untrue
only said to benefit you
if things had turned around
and my dreams come true
for you it would be an endless nightmare
so now i see
just how things will really be
so sad to say
I thought you were different
but not today

Death seems so comforting
I placed my heart in your hands
now i watch as you squeeze the life from it
expecting me to understand and still believe you love me
never feeling whole again

"Make It Alright"
Lost for eternity searching for the words to make it alright
searching for the soul I lost tonight
I heard you cry for me
but I was unable to set you free
I keep you trapped in my heart
where there's no key to let you go free
I bring you my misery
I bring you my tears
I bring you my pain and agony
I bring you my secrets
I bring you my fears
I bring you death
yet you do not fear
you still hold me dear

I use to be whole but now my heart you stole
the girl I use to know
disappeared long ago
memories only bring tears to my eyes
I fight everyday to continue to stay alive

Bleeding the story of my life
in misery
trapped in all madness
lost somewhere between the sadness
hollow cries fill my ears
and lonely tears fall from my eyes

I stare in the mirror only hollow eyes stare back at me
faded cries leave my tears to dry
the silence overwhelming
trembling lips
crimson stained finger tips
an empty soul
a blacken heart
haunting whispers tormenting
forever lost in a dream
memories flowing through my veins
words cutting me back down to size
bleeding from all the lies

Silence so loud in my ears
memories lost in the past
no longer sure if they were real or just dreams I
thought would last
the darkness that held me tight has strangled me
nothing left it seems
I suppose I should feel free
but all I see is this four walls closing in on me

Memories fading fast
this time nothing will last
empty inside,dead but still alive
haunting whispers of secrets untold
tormented lost souls
growing cold
getting old
empty hole where my heart use to lay
misery surrounds me
sorrow taunts me
memories haunt me
sadness swallowing me whole
shattered soul
visions of what should have been
dance around in my head
cries of loneliness seem to never end
staring out the window of life
realizing i am on the wrong side
looking out
wishing that what i see could be me
but bounded by my own thoughts
held captive by the dreary night
once was beautiful and bright
now dull and dim
drained of dreams

My heart has stopped beating
my dreams have been stolen
silent tears kiss me
empty fears beat me
tormented by your whispers
haunted by thoughts
swallowed by your arms that try to hold me close
but I am only a vision in your imagination
never to be held
never to feel
never to cry
never to know how it feels to care
for I am dead
a lost soul in the oblivion
scared flesh
broken words that slip pass
I am deaf
I am alone
I am the poison that whom has scorned
buried six feet under
wallowing in my gave
dead with selfpity
and all the guilt that blames
no longer feel
no longer care
my emotions have been drained from me
all I knew seems so plain to me
I was only a fool
I should have knew..
I was the one to blame for this....

"Forget Me"
Forget me when the pain sinks in
forget me when the tears stain
forget me when the blood pours out
forget me when there's nothing left
just forget I exist......

I know the end is near
visions no longer clear
heartache and sorrow consume my very being
misery my only company

Tell me once again you love me....
how I long to hear those words just once more
how I long to feel you touch
to see your eyes smiling back at me
to feel you hold me close to you again

Bleeding the story of my life
in misery
trapped in all the madness

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The People Suck Page may offend so if you get offended
easily maybe you shouldnt go..

My Wake Up Page

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This Is Very Last Time This Web Site Will Be

My Thoughts September 27,1999
Others Poems September 20,1999
People Suck September 21,1999
My Poems September 27,1999

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