Look, It's The FWF Hardcore Champ...

And You Though He Couldn't Accomplish Anything!

---{Tonight is the night. This is everything. The be all and end all. It all culminates tonight. All the hard work and all the sacrifices. All the betrayals and alliances are out of the window tonight. Because tonight it is just Justin and Ringo. Mano e Mano. Man to Man. Table to Table. Chair to Chair. Dildo to Dildo?! NO wait, that was Joey Goldman. Tonight, two men go in to the ring and one walks out. Tonight, at Cyberslam, Ringo will go down and Justin will walk out STILL Hardcore Champion. Everythin that ou have been waiting for happens tonight. The Hardcore Champion, The Tag Champions, The IC Champ, The Big Mouth Champ, and the four way dance for The World Title. They are all decided tonight. The most important to Justin is the Hardcore Championship. Becuase it involves him. This is Justin's last chance to express himself before the match. What will he have to say...}---

---{The camera fades in to show a suburban street. The camera pans around to show a train station. It is early in the morning, rush hour to be exact. People are standing on the platform in their suits and dresses and blouses reading papers and drinking coffee. Then Justin, Lil Person, and Joey come into view walking towards the station. Justin is wearing jeans a a plain white t-shirt. He is carrying a black duffel bag slung over his right shoulder. Yes, Lil Person and Joey are in suits. Is that a rule or something? I mean c'mon. Have we ever seen these guys in casual dress? I don't think so. Anyways, Justin walks up to the ticket booth to but tickets for the train.}---

Justin- How much for a ticket?

Train Attendant- Carter.

Justin- No, how much for a train ticket?

Train Attendant- Carter.

Justin- Damnit. I didn't ask for a history of former US presidents. I asked you...HOW MUCH FOR A TRAIN TICKET?!

Train Attendant- CARTER!

Justin- Screw you, I'll get a car.

---{Justin, obviously pissed off, turns around and searches for a car rental place. Justin finds one and he, Lil Person, and Joey walk over to it. They walk in and up to the counter.}---

Justin- I need a car for the day. I don't care how much. Just give me a convertible.

Car Attendant- T...

Justin- I said I don't care. Just take this ***Hands Attendant American Express Card..Never Leave home without it..Cheap Plug***, charge it, and give me the keys.

Car Attendant- ***Handing Justin keys*** Thank you. Car 45.

Justin- Finally, some english.

---{Justin turns around and walks to the car lot. He looks around and spots the sign for his car. He walks to it, pops the trunk with the key, and dumps the bag inside the trunk. He opens the car and gets in. Lil Person and Joey get in the back and the cameraman gets in the passenger side.}---

Justin- God damn Bostonians. Freaking people can't speak a single word of English. I mean really. Damn.

Lil Person- Calm down Justin. Where we going first?

Justin- ***Turning Ignition and Backing out of Lot*** I don't know. Where do you guys want to go?

Joey- ***In a Kiddy Voice*** I wanna go to the Musuem.

Justin- Joey, first, stop acting like a 7 year old and calm down. Second off, we are not going to the museum. There is no point.

Joey- ***Kiddy Voice Still*** But I wanna. WAWAWAWA!

Justin- Stop crying you big baby.

Joey- ***Puckering Lips to Make Justin Feel Guilty*** Pleeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzz. ****Quickly***Please, Please, Please.

Justin- NO!

Joey- ***Crossing Arms and Exposing Bottom Lip*** I HATE YOU!

Justin- FINE! We'll go to the museum.

Joey- YEA!

Justin- Just shutup for the rest of the way into the city.

Lil Person- How long to the city anyways?

Justin- I think about 25 minutes. At least thats what the hotel said.

Lil Person- Ok. Co...

Joey- Are we there yet?

Justin- No.

Lil Person- We are going to see Pedro today right?

Justin- Ye...

Joey- Are we there yet?

Justin- No, Joey we are not. Now calm down and sit back. And we are going to Fenway today to visit Pedro.

Lil Person- He's the only thing that gives this city any dignity.

Justin- Yea I kno...

Joey- ***Quickly*** Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

Justin- NO DAMNIT! Just for that Joey, we aren't going to the museum.

Joey- ***Pleading*** No, Justin. Please. I'm sorry. Really Sorry.

Justin- No. You blew it. Now leave me alone so I can drive.

Lil Person- Justin, c'mon. He's just excited. Let him have his fun in the museum. It'll be educational.

Justin- Fine. But the museum he wants to go to is the Kids' Museum with all those jungle gyms and TV studio.

Lil Person- Really?

Justin- Yea. It's stupid.

Lil Person- ***Excitedly***Stupid? That's awesome. I want to join him.

Justin- Ugh. I surrounded by idiots. You are more immature than that idiot Ringo. What a freaking idiot. He goes as far as to insult my name? How low can you go Ringo? Sounds like someone is running out of ideas. O no Ringo, I am so hurt. You made fun of me because you don't think I live up to my name. I should end my career just now because you don't like me name. Ha! Ringo, your opinion means as much to me as well...Doomsday. Hey look, you and your partner have something in common, you both don't mean shit. In life and in this buisness. Ringo, if there was anyone who should be ridiculed because of their name it is you. Ringo? Hmmm....sounds a lot like a name of a...Clown? Yea. That's it. Or how about the missing Beatle? Eaither way Ringo, my name makes more sense than yours. Someone that had the Hardcore Title and is named Justin Sane is going to put a little more fear into someone than Ringo "The Clown" Roberts. ***Justin Swerves Out of The Way to Avoid A Car That Suddenly Swerved Into The Front Of Him*** Can you believe that? You guys ok? ***Yelling Out of Window*** YOU DUMB ASS! I'M JUSTIN SANE OF FWF! IF YOU WANT TO RUN SOMEONE OVER GO FIND RINGO, HE NEED SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT! ***Calming Down*** Damn, what an idiot. You know Ringo, these people can be compared to you. Insignificant, Inconsiderate, and just plain Idiots. Hey look at that three Is. Where have I heard that from? Hmmm....it escapes me at the moment. O well, Ringo, you won't escape me tonight. Tonight Ringo, I am going to deliver The Mental Breakdown, and tonight, I walk away champ.

---{Damn, people are so inconsiderate. People from Boston just don't give a damn. We damn near could have lost the Franchise. Then all the FWF fans wouldn't be able to attend or watch Cyberslam because they would be too grief stricken over the lost of their Icon. But he lives and Cyberslam will be an extravanganza, so let's not concentrate on the past. The car pulls up to a parking lot across from the museum. Justin pulls up to the attendant.}---

Justin- Can I park my car here?

Parking Lot Attendant- Ya, Par ya ca in the Boston Yar.

Justin- What?!

Car Lot Attendant- Par ya ca in the Boston Yar.

Justin- Damnit! Another Boston accent. You listen and you listen good. If you don't speak English then I'll have to kick your ass.

Car Attendant- Ok. No problem.

Justin- Woah there. Why are you speaking like this all of a sudden? DDon't you have some type of accent?

Car Attendant- Na, Bostonions haven't had that for years.

Justin- Then why the hell would you act like you do?

Car Attendant- Some stupid rule. Mayor says we have to sepearate ourselves. Says different is good.

Justin- Don't you know that everyone makes fun of you guys for that accent?

Car Attendant- Really?

Justin- Yea. A lot.

Car Attendant- Damnit! Stupid mayor. Screw him.

Justin- Yea, that's right. Stand up for yourself. Can I park here though?

Car Attendant- Yea, no problem.

Justin- Ok. One question though before I park.

Car Attendant- Shoot.

Justin- Why did you call this Boston Yard? Isn't that some famous Bostonion type quote.

Car Attendant- Because this is...Boston Yard. Look at the sign if you don't believe me.

Justin- ***Looking at sign*** Well I'll be damned. O well. How much?

Car Attendant- Tell ya what. You give me an autograph and I'll let it slide.

Justin- You know who I am?

Car Attendant- Yeah, of course. You are Justin Sane of FWF. I wanted to come to Cyberslam, but I don't have tickets.

Justin- Really? How about instead of an autograph, I give you ringside seats and tickets to the after party?

Car Attendant- Of course man. Sure.

Justin- ***Reaches into pocket and hands him two tickets*** Take a friend.

Car Attendant- My wide would love to go! Listen, any time you are in Boston, you look me up, Mike Johnston. I'll give you bed and board.

Justin- Cool. Wait..I got a better idea. You know Pedro Martinez?

Mike- Yea. He's the man.

Justin- Wanna meet him?

Mike- Really?

Justin- Yea, we are going to see him now. Let me park and you get ready.

Mike- Wow. But wha...ahhh screw this place. I'll close it for the day.

Justin- Ok, I'm going to go park now.

Joey- What about the museum?!

Justin- We'll go tomorrow.

---{Ok, now I know you are asking yourself, why would Justin ask a perfect stranger to spend the day with him? I don't know either. I was hoping you did. Anyways, Justin parks the car as Mike sets up the chains and closes the lot for the day. He gets his coat and stands outside the lot waiting for Justin. Justin leaves his back in the car and goes to meet Mike.}---

Justin- So Mike, you ready to meet Pedro Martinez?

Mike- ***Beginning to Walk*** Hells yeah.

Justin- Ok. Let's go then.

---{Justin begins to walk down the street with Mike. Lil Person and Joey stand there for a minute...***cough***Babies***cough***...but then quickly follow.}---

Justin- So, Mike. You like FWF.

Mike- Yea, I watch it every week. I am your biggest fan. I saw your match with Joey Goldman. That was the best match I have seen. Except for that dildo thing.

Justin- Yea, that was kind of disgusting. But anyways, you're biggest fan?

Mike- Yea, easily. I have followed you everywhere.

Justin- Cool. So what do you think is going to happen tonight? With Ringo.

Ringo- I know you'll win, but I don't trust him.

Justin- Yeah, me neither. I think he has something up his sleeve. No one can be that cocky going to a match with...

Mike- The Hero, The Icon, The Franchise Justin Sane. Your F'N Rolemodel!

Justin- I'm impressed.

Mike- Thanks.

Justin- No problem.

Mike- O shit...I just remembered. I can't go see Pedro. I have to go somewhere with my wife. Damn!

Justin- It's ok. I'll see you at Cyberslam tonight, though...right?

Mike- Wouldn't miss it for the world.

---{Mike turns around and heads in the opposite direction as Justin continues, but wait, he's forgotten something. What is it?}---

Justin- SHIT!...We have to be at Cyberslam early today!

Lil Person- Why?!

Justin- I don't know. Something about new wrestlers needing to be there for a seminar of some sort and then we gotta go to the autograph session.

Lil Person- Sonuva...

Justin- O well, better head back to the car.

---{Justin turns around and sprints for the car lot. He catches Mike right before he leaves. He asks for the keys and Mike gives it to him. They shake hands and Justin runs to the car. He jumps in and backs out. He looks and then turns the corner. He waits for Joey and Lil Person to hop in. Finally, they get there. They jump in as Justin starts to drive.}---

Justin- Call Pedro, Lil Person. Tell him we can't make it. And tell him we'll see him tomorrow.

Justin- With all this rush and commotion I almost forgot about Ringo. Ringo, in a few hours we lock up with millions and millions of fans watching. It will be a spectacle that I expect...no wait...know that I will overrun. This Ringo, is my crowning achievement. This is what I have been waiting my whole life for. And you think I am going to let it slip away?! No. No way in hell. Tonight I will show everyone why...I'M JUST INCREDIBLE...I'M JUST INTENSE ...I'M JUSTIN SANE! The man with the SKILL to THRILL and the CASH to FLASH!

Justin- Aren't You Looking Forward To Tonight?!..What?!..No?! Ahhh...Screw You!

---{Justin puts the peddle to the metal as he speeds through the Boston Streets. Tonight is the night. Will Justin come out on top?! Of course!...}---


©2000 True Icons


Probably Not.
[Visit The Home of Insanity!][Mail The Franchise]