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We were lucky to get tickets to "Sheryl Crow and Friends." Read the review! |
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Volume I, Issue VI
9/22/99 -- We're on vacation -- see you when we get back. Next update, October 1st -- look for 'new yorkers in chicago', an all new pick of the week, as well as the latest in the 'rant' department. Thanks for reading -- tell a friend. random accusations --- Enough with the 'nascent', for God's sake! Everything these days, in the press, is nascent -- from Hillary's senate campaign, to Boerum Hill as a restaurant destination, Natalie Portman’s acting career, soup to nuts -- you name it, it's 'nascent'. Being somewhat of a word fetishist, it's driving me up the wall. Every local newspaper and magazine seems to be obsessed with this annoying word -- defined in Webster's as "coming or having recently come into existence." How about budding? How come no one uses the word budding? Never mind. Don't. But please -- save me from tearing my hair out, and stop, for the love of God. You know who you are. ---- Michael Stipe -- get your tongue out of her mouth, and step away! Her, is Toni Collette, one of my all time favorites since her searing portrayal of the self-obsessed Muriel, as in Muriel's Wedding. It's extremely satisfying to see her acting in a hit such as Sixth Sense (great flick, ended a little too abruptly) -- Now everyone will just simply go "Oh! I know her! She was in that..what’s it called..dammit..what’s that movie called...shit!...I can’t remember...give me a minute.." But at least her face is recognizable -- a start. It doesn't make me happy to see her mug splashed across the gossip columns, playing tongue tag with the formidable Mr. REM. Just jealous. But happy for her, at least she's been dragged into the spotlight, finally, after all her hard work. Toni! ---- Since I spend 13 hours a day in Times Square between two jobs, it’s only natural that I’m once again compelled to muse upon it’s glorious excesses -- thing is, suddenly, my office is on Broadway between Ricky Martin Avenue and Britney Spears Boulevard. Help! Has the city finally gone overboard in it's zealous campaign to give every street, sidewalk, alley and highway interchange away in memory of some schlub we've never heard of? Pardon me for being ignorant, but who the hell is Ari Halberstam, and wouldn't you feel goofy if they named the entrance ramp to the Brooklyn Bridge after you? God forbid the man's dead, but if I were he, i'd certainly object if I were still breathing. I mean -- it's one thing to have your name stamped on time forever, but goodness -- you'd hope you made a little more of a mark than that -- a memorial ramp. My. Meanwhile -- we're talking about pop stars that we won't remember in five years, having midtown streets named in their memory. But apparently, we needn't fear -- it's only a promotion for the MTV Music Video Awards, which was held this last Thursday, September 9th, which i'm sure I don't remember having seen. Hopefully, the signs come down post-haste -- if they don't, i'm complaining. No one ever confused Times Square with anything other than a pop-culture ghetto, but this street naming thing is going a bit far. We could at least go with The Beatles, Led Zeppelin or Jimi Hendrix. Probably already have their own streets though -- somewhere downtown, no doubt. What do I know? ---- Department of Naked Emperors (that is, without clothes): Park Slope is a toilet. Get over it. After hearing far too many opinions about this much ballyhooed Brooklyn nabe, I did a little investigative reporting on my own. Results were mixed (gorgeous brownstones and lots of lovely trees), until I strolled down 7th Avenue, where I encountered more smugness and unjustified self-satisfaction per square inch than anywhere since I last was in SoHo (and even there, they are a little more low key, for God's sake!) with far less to back up the attitude, regrettably. How unlucky for them -- The parallel that jumped straight out at me was the Lakeview neighborhood on the North Side of Chicago, where, hey -- there's some nice shops, some coffee, a book store or two, but truth of the matter is, the place never really shaped up into much of anything. Rents are sky high (in Chicago, that means paying $900 for a 1BR -- gasp!) and residents act as though they were the second coming. Too bad for them -- it just makes them look dumber than they already are. So take your veggier-than-thou-lesbian-chic-1.5-kids-and-a-Saab and get thee to the Midwest. There's a lot of people like you there. Apologies to Pete Hamill for ever doubting him when I hear him complain about the rampant gentrification of his beloved Brooklyn. Truly sorry for your loss, I am. Email: dj@asan.com Next Update: 1 October
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