I feel like Lewis and Clark, and not because I just got back from boating on the Columbia River – but because I also just got back from my voyage of discovery to Sydney, Australia, where the Games are about to begin.

Of course, the rest of the press and millions of others have known for numbers of years now what a fantastically magical city Sydney is, but I tend to sort of sift through hype unless I’ve actually seen something like this for myself.

Believe every bit of it – I am now convinced that if this cosmo-metrop of five mil were any closer to anywhere, half of us would live there. It’s New York without random violence or the inordinate amount of stress, Los Angeles with a soul, Paris with a heart, London with better food, Milan without the snobbery, an english-speaking Asian city in a nation of immigrants whose ideals and ideas mimic the United States’ in more ways than they realize.

In short, Sydney is one of the most amazing cities I’ve ever encountered. Much like New York, it’s energy shifts from block to block, there’s a stunning amount of diversity and a stunning amount of dirt as well – it’s no Emerald City, even if it is in Oz – there’s so much about it that’s sad and depressed, entire sections of the city that are basically boring, they have their own Bensonhurst, Flushing, Staten Island, the like – it’s all there.

One of the oddest things to note about the Olympics is the placement of the Olympic Park. It gave me new hope for New York to host in the years to come, because the truth is, the geo/socio positioning of the park in Homebush Bay is much like us having our Park at Flushing Meadows. Cab or train in and out of the park – on the fringes of this abandoned Armed Forces depot are tired, scruffy neighborhoods filled with down on their luck immigrants – Lidcombe next door sees plenty of crime (in fact, while I was in town, a cute little Asian girl, about 18, was kidnapped and later killed when thrown from a car, just about 5 minutes from Opening Ceremonies), nearby Parramatta desperately positions itself to become the focus of tourism during the games, which is akin to Flushing claiming rights, pretty much a joke.

While Parramatta is interesting to say the least – stroll it’s central shopping area, it’s crowded and lively, cleaner than Flushing, but one the fringes, desperately dull and lifeless. A focal point of reconciliation efforts with Aboriginals, a Riverwalk has been created with the footpath painted entirely with symbolic native themes – walk down it on a weekend afternoon, you’ll see maybe 10 people along the way. The southern hemisphere’s largest shopping mall, the Westfield is located opposite the train station – now that’s mayhem. Five levels of it. Out in the streets you’ve got Falun Defa practicioners staging free workshops on the steps of the old Catholic church, evangelicals gearing up for a hymn sing, and colorful Aboriginal banners flying overhead. Does that kind of wacky diversity sound like Queens? Yes sir.

Nearby Cabramatta, pushed endlessly by tourism officials (for good reason -- it's an absolute rush) is a grimy, Tijuana-esque version of Vietnam, heroin distribution capital of Australia – stringy haired white youths harass passers by on all levels. I made the mistake of lighting a cigarette, and almost had to laugh, as 8 separate underaged teens begged smokes or change, even offering to pay (that’s Australia for you) within five minutes. The local council of Fairfield city has tried to brighten up the place by putting new street signs up everywhere with little logos on the right “Where West Meets East” and shopping on John Street is really a lot of fun – the Vietnamese food is widely regarded as excellent here, but still, pardon me for saying that it’s really no Olympic showpiece.

Which is fine – I’m all for the realness of this city, in fact, I totally get a charge out of it. It also gives me hope that, when the board looks at New York as a possible future location, hell – we’ll be a shoo-in.

Filth, ugly architecture, depression, crime? We can do that. What’s that you say? All around Olympic Park? Not a problem.

Let those Games begin!

Email: davidr@lifeingotham.com

Next Update: 1 Sept