"I SAID NEE-HA!"
The Late Night With Conan O'Brien Newsletter #02/21-055
Hola everyone! Wow. This has been a week to remember. Our big, big, HUGE Conan interview was this week. I got to speak to his Conan-ness on Wednesday. And all I can say is I bow to him. He’s a most swell and swanky individual. My favorite part of the entire interview was at the beginning. When you hear the words "Hi, this is Conan O’Brien" all your sense of staying calm flies right out the window. He knew I was a bit nervous about the whole thing, and was so nice about it though.
One of the first things his Conan-ness said to me—after finding out I’m in Scotland—was "So, are you eating haggis right now?" Aaaaaaaahh! Do you know what’s in that? I’m so not that way inclined thank you veeeeery much. Had to fight the urge to hit back with "Hey, Conan, where’s your sword!?! Cuz you’re a Barbarian!" Don’t worry, I behaved I’d never insult him with *that* line. The interview will be in two parts, the first part this week, the second part next week, a pattern I think works. I hope you all enjoy it.
Have a swell and swanky week everyone and let's get it awn!
Late Night Linzi
Editor
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CONTENTS -
LATE NIGHT NEWS
THE "NEE-HA!" CONAN INTERVIEW – PART 1
LATE NIGHT POLL
THE BONE OF CONTENTION by Micah Honees
UPCOMING GUESTS – February 22 – March 5 1999
THIS TIME LAST YEAR….
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LATE NIGHT NEWS
THE 15TH ANNUAL COLLEGE BANDSEARCH WINNERS are Crackpipe Wisconsin. They’re scheduled to perform on the show on Friday, March 5th. Watch out for a sneak preview of them on www.nbc.com/conan sometime this week. The band beat hundreds of entries to become this year’s grandprize winner. Previous winners have been Blightobody (1994), Skastafarians (1995), Sleeping Giants (1997), and Domo (1998).
RATINGS… Late Night maintains it’s 2.6 average across the US... Friday night hit a high for this week at 3.2 million viewers, and a 12% share of the ratings. More than double the viewers of it’s ABC competitor Late Late Show.
NEW GERMAN CONAN FANPAGE… If you’re German and you’re a Conan fan, why not check out THE FRECKLED WONDER by Claas Paletta. Cast bios, schedules, sketches, links and more. It can be found at: http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Stage/9939/index.htm
ALSO CHECK OUT NBC.COM/CONAN for new Actual items and Year 2000’s.
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THE "NEE-HA!" CONAN O’BRIEN INTERVIEW:
17 FEBRUARY 1999
PART 1
Last week I asked you to send me in some questions that you might have had for Conan.
And so, armed with a bunch of these (not the rude ones, sorry, but there are some things I won’t do)... I spoke to Conan on the phone on Wednesday morning... was I nervous? You bet! I was as floopy as you’ll ever find me, but a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do… Here’s how it went.
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I asked Conan to start off by telling us how a typical day for him would go.
My typical day starts usually with me getting nervous and crying. Then I get over that and I come into work. And I work out, that’s how I’m so muscular, I’m sure you’ve noticed that... I work out and then I come upstairs and I start having meetings about the different guests. Sometimes they tell me "oh I talked to this guest on the phone and they have nothing to say" sometimes they tell me "this guest is brilliant, this guest is great, it’s gonna be fun". Then we talk about the comedy and we go over things and we just do that until about 2 o’clock in the afternoon. Then at 2 o’clock we go downstairs and rehearse... At rehearsal, it’s like the show; we rehearse the comedy pieces that we do, me, and Andy and Max. Only, it’s sort of a dirty version, there’s a lot of swearing, people acting stupid and throwing things, it’s very disorganized, but it can be very funny.
Andy and I start saying things and each one tries to be more disgusting than the other. You know, we do it to amuse ourselves, but if we ever put it on the air we’d all be arrested.
Linzi: Funniest things that happen at rehearsal?
CONAN: There was a time when our head writer [Jonathan Groff] had to go use the bathroom, he’d had a lotta coffee, so he ran into the bathroom during rehearsal and we sent the camera crew in after him, he didn’t know, he found out and he got angry and chased the camera crew. We do things like that. Pranks. Childish things.
Linzi: Do they make fun of you?
CONAN: Oh all the time they do things. They play sound effects, everyone mocks me. I’ll make fun of the director [Liz Plonka] but then the director will make fun of me. If I have a pimple or something the camera crew will zoom in on it. It’s just all kind of things like that, but it’s good, it helps relax us for the show.
Question: Can you list the items on your desk and tell us the significance of each? (Al B)
CONAN: There’s the mug of Eisenhower. I’ve always been obsessed with American Presidents, coz I studied American History when I was in college and that was my favorite subject. So when the show was beginning, that was a gift someone had given me years before, the Eisenhower mug, It’s really pretty beautiful, it’s a nice mug, and I really loved it. So I put it on my desk coz I thought, the show is so silly it would be good if there’s an authority figure present. Because when I first began doing the show no one knew who I was, they didn’t know who Andy was and we didn’t have much respect from people, so I thought I’ll put a figure of great authority and respect on the table, they’ll be someone there who will have respect. So and then he’s just been there since the beginning.
Then the only other item really is my mug, which my friend Greg Daniels, who used to be my writing partner, he went on to create the show "King Of The Hill" a big hit here in America. When I got the job he took a class where you can make pottery and he made me that mug. He painted all the silly nonsense words on it that I say.
Linzi: What are the words?
CONAN: Um, they make no sense. I used to make silly nonsense words. Like I’ve always been a fan of nonsense, you know, kind of like Lewis Caroll. So, I used to say things like "Sweet, sweet goo", "Gibble", instead of "hello" I would say "shello" to people. I would say "yabble", I would say "Jub-jub" – Jub-Jub was the name that I gave for Salma’s Iguana. We were all sitting round the room and everyone was trying to think of a name, and they were all thinking of normal names like "Susie" or whatever, little normal pet names "Fido" and I just said "Jub-Jub" and they all laughed and said "ok, Jub-Jub". So I came up with the thing "Jub-Jub" and then Greg put it on the mug. So the mug is basically just a little drawing of me at my desk and it says all those nonsense words all around it.
~CONAN ON FAME~
Linzi: Has fame changed you?
CONAN: I don’t think so. I mean, I have friends who tell me they don’t really think I’ve changed that much. I think the secret is that is that I never thought too much of myself in a way. I don’t think I ever had a huge ego, I always had a lot of self-doubt, and I was very self-deprecating and made fun of myself. It didn’t really change. You know there are people that have said "Well now that your show is doing well, you shouldn’t make fun of yourself anymore," but that’s my sense of humor and I still kind of feel that way. I don’t think it’s changed me that much. I’ve had the same girlfriend pretty much since the show began. So it’s not like I can really go out and date supermodels or anything, and even if I did, I would probably feel too self-conscious, I would think that I looked stupid. I would feel silly trying to live like a big celebrity. I don’t like to go to big movie premiers and wave at photographers and stuff because that all just feels silly to me. I just like doing my show and I’ve got my dog and my girlfriend.
Linzi: Will we see Hudson on the show?
CONAN: Maybe we will. Maybe we’ll put him in something. He’s really cute, he’s a really sweet dog and I think he’d like to be. He came to rehearsal the other day, he came and he sat up at my desk. He loves people, so I think if he came out and saw an audience he’d be really happy. So maybe we’ll try and write him into a sketch.
Question: Is it possible to have a ‘normal’ relationship being famous? (Damone)
CONAN: Yeah, yeah! Sure you can. It’s not always easy because. You know sometimes if you’re having, whenever anybody has a wife or a girlfriend or a boyfriend or a husband, whenever you have that situation there are times when you quarrel or there are times when you’re not getting along and you bicker, "Well you have the car keys, no took the car keys, no you had them..." and you start bickering. If you’re a television personality everybody is looking at you, so sometimes that’s a drag... The fact that people are looking at you sometimes isn’t fun. But other than that, it’s not like I’m Michael Jackson or Tom Cruise. I’m this person who has this show at 12:30 at night, so it’s a more comfortable level of fame. Do you know what I mean, it’s not like "crazy fame".
Linzi: You haven’t had to disguise yourself so as not be recognized?
CONAN: It doesn’t work in my case. If I dress up I’m still 6’ 4 with this weird hair. Even when I wear a hat and glasses people know that it’s me.
Question: Do you have any big-time celebrity friends? (Jen)
CONAN: Not really. The only real big celebrity friend that I have, who’s like a close friend of mine, is Lisa Kudrow from "Friends", but that’s because we knew each other from long before either one of us got famous. She and I just were friends for years and years.
[A funny noise goes off in the background.]
CONAN: Did you hear that sound in the background?
Linzi: Yeah, what was that?
CONAN: That’s my cuckoo clock. The staff gave me a cuckoo clock, it’s a real wooden, German cuckoo clock. But instead of a wooden bird coming out of the little hatch, they changed it and a little Conan head comes out... and it’s got a little red pompadour. Whenever I’m doing talking to people on the phone or doing an interview you can hear it going "cuckoo" in the background. It sounds like Pewee’s Playhouse.
I’m not a big believer of calling up other celebrities and saying "hey, I’m a celebrity let’s be friends". It just seems like a phoney reason to be friends.
Question: Has your girlfriend ever been jealous when you’re talking to someone like Rebecca Romijn? (Melanie)
CONAN: I don’t let her watch those shows. She doesn’t work at the show, and she doesn’t watch the show at night because that means she’s watching it with me and if I watch the show it makes me crazy because if it’s a really good show I get excited and can’t sleep. And if it was a show that I didn’t like for some reason I get upset that it wasn’t good enough, then I can’t sleep. So either way, she’s like "You can’t watch it at 12:30, you have to watch it on tape the next day if you want." But if Rebecca Romijn or someone’s on I just say "hey, let’s watch a movie instead". The less she knows about that stuff the better.
~AWAY FROM THE SHOW~
Linzi: How do you like to do to relax when you’re not at the show?
CONAN: Away from the show I’m pretty boring. I like to play the guitar and what I do is I turn on the radio and I play along with songs. I try and figure them out and play along, and I have a bunch of electric guitars. Which really annoys my dog, he hates when I play the guitar. I have a little house out in the country and I go there sometimes. I meet friends for lunch or something, or go see a movie. Nothing too exciting. I’m probably kind of boring. I like to hang around New York, walk around and go to guitar stores or go to bookstores just things like that. Nothing too crazy.
Linzi: I heard that Jimmy Vivino, who I am a HUGE fan of, gave you guitar lessons.
CONAN: You like Jimmy Vivino?
Linzi: I lurve Jimmy Vivino.
CONAN: He’s a really nice guy too. One nice thing about Jimmy is that he can show me the guitar, he can teach me things. He’ll come in my dressing room and I’ll ask him, you know, how do you play… there’s this new song out by this group and I have the CD, and I’ll go "how do you play that?" And he’ll listen to it and he’ll show me how the person plays it. So it’s really fun, it’s a good time.
Linzi: Do you ever get to go to see him live?
CONAN: Yeah! I go to see him play with his, he has a band, he plays with Johnnie Johnson sometimes, he plays with Al Kooper sometimes, and he plays with Mike Merritt – the bass player, he plays with him. And he plays with this drummer who’s going to fill in for Max. [James Wormworth] He plays with James who’s a really good drummer and a nice guy. So it’s good that James is gonna come and fill in coz the whole group already knows him and knows how to play with him.
Question: What books are you currently reading? (KF)
CONAN: I just finished reading this book Undaunted Courage, it’s about Lewis and Clark and I’m reading a biography of Keith Moon. I used to be a big "Who" fan when I was a kid and I really liked Keith Moon, and I tried to be a drummer but I wasn’t good enough.
Question: What are you listening to right now? (John)
CONAN: I’m listening to the new "Black Crowes" album coz they’re coming on the show in a couple of weeks and I like them. And you know that group "Fastball", you know that big hit "The Way", I learned how to play that, and I’m trying to figure out the solo, so I’ve been listening to that song.
Linzi: Did Jimmy teach you how to play it?
CONAN: No, someone else showed me how. I pretty much had it figured out except I couldn’t figure out one chord. The one point where it goes from "f sharp minor" to "f sharp major" and I couldn’t figure that out, one of the sound people on the show figured it out and he told me. But I didn’t ask Jimmy, because sometimes I don’t want to bother him too much. I feel like I’m being a pain in the neck.
Question: Are you going to be in a movie? (Chantale)
CONAN: No, not if I can help it. I mean, if the right thing came along. Sometimes I get offered things, or a possibility comes up but it seems like kind of a dumb thing to go do. I’m not someone who’s looking, I like what I do and I don’t want to use this show to go try and be in a bad movie. Coz I think that would be a waste. If someone came up with a part where I could do something really interesting or funny that wouldn’t disappoint my fans then I would certainly do it. I’d like to try it sometime, but it’s not a big goal of mine. I sort of like doing the show that I’m doing now.
Question: Would you ever consider hosting SNL? (Melanie)
CONAN: It’s a good question. I’ve thought about it at times and… do you think I should do it?
Linzi: I think it would be brilliant.
CONAN: You’d like it? Well, one of the things I worry about… I’m kind of a little bit of a perfectionist about those things. Saturday Night Live is risky because you go in there and if the writers are having an off week... and there’s not a lot of time, there’s only a couple of days to put it together... I would hate it to be disappointing and I’d be really crushed if, because I used to work there, I’d be really crushed if I tried to do it and it just wasn’t good.
Linzi: Have you been asked to do it?
Not formally, no, but I know if I called up Lorne [Michaels] he’s probably let me do it. We’ve kind of skirted around it a bit. I think they kind of enquired once, but I felt like I wasn’t ready yet. So maybe sometime in the future I would do it if they wanted me to. I’ve always felt like I should just work on making my own show good. It’s hard enough to try and do your own show every night, let alone to try and go and do someone else’s show.
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**READ PART TWO IN THE NEXT ISSUE OF "NEE-HA!"**
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LATE NIGHT POLL
THIS WEEK’S POLL QUESTION: Battle of the top two Satellite TV networks this week. What’s best? Clive Clemmons Inappropriate Response Channel or Bill Reilly’s Jim & Choke Channel?
Send your response before Thursday to: LateNightPoll@hotmail.com
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LAST WEEK’S POLL QUESTION: What's been your favorite recent satellite TV channel?
Definitely the jump and choke channel, although the Barbarino Ray was really good. I will always have a place in my heart for Embryonic Rockabilly Polka Dotted Fighter Pilots. I sing that everywhere. (Kate)
There are 2 great channels! The first is the "Inappropriate" channel! The second has got to be "The Bill Reilly Jump and Choke" channel! That was so funny! (Julie)
I have three words: "JUMP AND CHOKE" (JASON)
The one with the puppet's last words was the funniest! Good idea whoever thought of it! I’d like to see more of them puppets!! Rowl (ACW)
I've got two favorites: Okay, not like the jump and choke one wasn't supreme, I think I liked the puppets' last words one a wee bit more. And, I've been faithful to the Inappropriate Response channel for its existence. (Miayyin)
I do like the 'Inapropriate Responses by Clive Clemmins' channel. And also, the 'Embryonic Rockabilly Polka-Dotted Fighter Pilots' channel, just 'cause that song is the coolest thing ever written. (Nos4a2)
Guess that would have to be the cartoon channel, where we've gotten such gems as the Polka-dotted Rockabilly Embryonic Fighter Pilots my all time fave! (Karen)
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THE BONE OF CONTENTION by Micah Honees
There comes a time
When we heed a certain call…
No, these are not the only the second most famous words written by Michael Jackson (the winner being: Let's settle out of court) but they favorably address a certain topic I want to discuss this week in Conanville; that being the bands that have appeared on "Late Night". Now we all know that the chief reason they're on the show is to plug their latest release and get some exposure. If you're a cynical consumer like me, you scratch your head (or whatever) and wonder sometimes just who the hell thinks this is good music?
Well, I know music and I know what I like. Here is a list of some of the CDS I have been influenced into purchasing as a result of the performers appearing on "Late Night":
SON VOLT "Trace"-Well, this is not entirely a result of "Late Night". I was working in a record shop at the time and we used to play this CD in the store. When I saw them perform "Drown" with Conan, I was immediately hooked. Jay Farrar has the absolute loneliest and saddest voice I have ever heard, which incredibly makes the listener feel hopeful during his upbeat tunes and like thirty feet of crap is piled on them on the sad ones. One of my favorite bands, I recommend their latest called "Wide Swing Tremolo". I am no fan of country music but they are an incredible, incredible band.
BIG HEAD TODD AND THE MONSTERS "Beautiful World"-Another band I am a fan of but since they are about as popular as a hairy dude at the nudist beach to mainstream radio, I had no idea that BHT had a new CD out. Those who were struck by "Resignation Superman" and went out and bought the disc, well, I offer my apologies. While it grows on you, the CD is about half good. I suggest the koan that is "Strategem" or the new "Live Monsters" as more representative of the true BHT sound.
BRIAN SETZER "Dirty Boogie"-Really liked this after seeing the huge band on the stage. Began hating Setzer after hearing the original of "Jump jive n' Wail" in a friggin' jeans commercial.
THE MARVELOUS 3 "Hey! Album"-The most recent purchase to make this column, after I saw them perform "Freak of the week" I totally dug their energy and besides, the song is the name of a certain award near and dear to my heart. Imagine if you will if Pearl Jam did, ahem, the dirty boogie with Green Day and ended up all happy in the process. Well, that's The Marvelous 3. "Freak of the week" is easily the best song on a darn good record but "You're so yesterday" is a catchy tune too.
THE CARDIGANS-I went out and picked up whatever the hell the name of the record is with "Love Fool" on it after seeing the fetching Nina Persson and her band sing a punkier version of that song on "Late Night". Well, the record sucks and none of the other songs sound like the breezy "Love Fool" at all. If you own this CD, my condolences. I hope you were able to return it as I was. If not, well, at least it's functional as a coaster. Or you could hang it from the rearview mirror of your car. (By the way, what is that about? Looks kind of silly to me.)
FUEL "Sunburn"-Another mistake. I really liked "Shimmer" when they played it on the show (and the other 17,000 times I heard it on the radio) and their new tune "Bittersweet" is pretty good, too. Before I continue, I should parenthetically mention that my mom always said if you don't have anything nice to say that you shouldn't say a darn thing. So, ahem. Let's move on to the end of this column.
Well, as you can see, the musical guests of "Late Night" are a mixed bag that is supposed to appeal to a wide variety of tastes. For every Sheryl Crow rockin' out there's an Elton John shmaltzing up the airwaves. And they're all there to push the product and get their faces on the TV. Buyers beware.
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UPCOMING GUESTS – February 22 – March 5 1999
MONDAY The 22nd (First shown on 11-5-98):
Adam Sandler,
Jonathan Taylor Thomas,
Frank Pellegrino
TUESDAY The 23rd:
Kevin Nealon,
Ed Byrne (Yeah, baby yeah, YEAH!!)
WEDNESDAY The 24th:
Garry Marshall,
Shannon Hall
THURSDAY The 25th:
Martin Short,
Anthony LaPaglia,
Black Crowes
FRIDAY The 26th:
Jon Stewart,
Tina Majorino,
Natalie Merchant
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MONDAY The 1st (First shown on 11-20-98):
Charlize Theron,
Jerry Springer,
Everclear
TUESDAY The 2nd:
Al Franken,
Louis CK
WEDNESDAY The 3rd:
Wendie Malick,
Susan Tedeschi
Bare Jr.
THURSDAY The 4th:
Mark Wahlberg
FRIDAY The 5th:
Treat Williams,
Crackpipe Wisconsin (college band search winners)
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UPCOMING MUSO GUESTS:
The Chieftains (March 17)
Steve Earle & The Del McCoury Band (March 19)
The Neville Brothers (March 30)
Susan Tedeschi (April 07)
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THIS TIME LAST YEAR….
ON Monday 23rd Feb last year we took a trip into repeats-ville with NBC showing a classic episode—the one where our beloved Big Red goes to Cologne, Germany, or as I’ll always refer to it now by "Aftershaven". These people have a lot to answer for! In Germany Conan visits "Die Harald Schmidt Show" and discusses the similarities between their shows. And later they take some calls from Instant Viewer Feedback. Guests were Matt Lauer, Lisa Rinna, and outspoken author James Ellroy.
On Tuesday 2-24-98 Guests were Matthew Modine, Roy Jones Jr., and music from Patty Loveless. Conan took a trip outside of the studio to show the world Max’s Billboard. He’s stunned that Max is famous enough to have a HUGE billboard overlooking Times Square and goes about speaking to people in the street to find out what they think. Some are creeped out, and some are unimpressed because they’ve got one too. Later in the show Conan faces yet another Moral Dilemma and brings in the Devil and Bear to help him out.
On Wednesday, The 25th Robert Duvall, Bill Bellamy, and Samuel Folsom visited the show. Conan and Andy took a look at some Children's Drawings and part of a mini-play "Legends in Black History: George Washington Carver" was shown.
On Thursday 26th, show #900, Conan talked to President Clinton and Saddam Hussein live via satellite. Talented Cat Show Contestants were featured throughout and guests were actress Jane Seymour, SNL’s Will Ferrell, and music from Hanson.
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WEEK IN REVIEW By Quinn
Tuesday The 16th:
Dave Chappelle, Rebecca Gayheart, James Ellroy
Chat: Valentine's Day
Retiring the dress
In the Year 2000
Audience deliveries
Wednesday The 17th:
Rosie Perez, Joshua Jackson, John Pizzarrelli
Mono: Importance of the thumbs up
Chat: Dawon's Creek (reactions), Lief Ericson, "Where Are They Now?"
Actual Items
Hersey's commercial--Awkward Vampire
Elmo is missing
Thursday The 18th:
Andy Garcia, Jimmy Fallon, Afghan Whigs
Todd Rundgren sits in w/ band
Chat: Being knighted, Benny Hill
Triumph at Westminster Dog Show
Danny the NBC page is back from Attractive Camp
Friday The 19th:
Andie MacDowell, Tony V, Myles Berkowitz
Chat: Andy's "Modest Guy", change on the floor
LN Apologies
LN Salmon Grab
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FYI
"NEE-HA!" #55 was edited by Linzi Gallacher with thanks to Micah Honees, Marc, Conan and Quinn.
"NEE-HA!" is on the web at:
http://www.angelfire.com/ny/lacob/conan.html
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END QUOTE
"The problem of how to continue this 'Year 2000' bit once it becomes the year 2000 will be solved, when the show is cancelled in December 1999, and replaced by an infomercial about miracle herbs that reduce menstrual cramping starring Joyce DeWitt, who ironically doesn't even menstruate anymore." - In The Year 2000
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