"Oh, here we go again... another fascinating journey through the halls of Capeside High. "Doesn't it bother you how undeniably dull it is here?" Joey asked entering the doors of the familiar but hated school campus.
"Hmm..." an indistict utterance came from Dawson's mouth as he gazed off into the distance.
"Okay, what gives? This is the part where you join in mocking the small minded and predictable nature of the people we live amongst. Dawson??"
"I'm sorry, Joe. I'm just thinking of something else."
"-- and something tells me it's not your upcoming math test which you haven't studied for." Joey discreetly rolled her eyes as she caught a glimse of the lucky winner who was so obviously the object of Dawson's attention. "And I think you got the word wrong... it's not something, it's someone. How are things going with her? Is remaining 'just friends' giving you the *itch*?"
"Joey, c'mon. You know it's not like that. It's more than that. I just feel-- ugh, never mind."
Glancing at a poster next to Dawson's locker, Joey gestured toward it,"So...?"
"So... what?" Dawson realizing the subtle innuendo Joey was hinting at as she nodded toward the advertisement for the "Spring Gala". "Joey, you can't be serious. Ask my ex-girlfriend to the spring formal?"
Joey just gave a slight shrug and around the corner came Jen Lindley... "Speak of the devil..."
Dawson's gaze immediately affixed to the blonde beauty striding toward her locker, and then the bomb dropped. As Dawson's courage filled his chest and he took that first step toward her, Cliff beat him to it and Dawson followed the image of the two as they walked together down the hall. Dawson gave one look at Joey and in that instant relayed everything that he was thinking to her and buried his head into the locker.
**************
"... and so she suggested to go back to her place after all her parents were out of town and the hot tub was free. But you know the anticipation of that should be held out longer to get the, well, most out of it, if you know what I mean--"
"Pacey! When are you going to stop relaying your sex fantasies you had when you were sleeping in your Sesame Street pajamas last night and help me with this data. As much as I love doing your work for you, today's not the best day." Joey's pen busily wrote out her conclusions for that day.
"You're just jealous, baby, but I guarantee you a ride with the Pacey Whitter Love Machine. It'll happen.... and they aren't pajamas. They're boxers." Pacey humbly sat next to her slyly taking a peek at the notes Joey had jotted down.
"Bite me, Pacey. I would think my standards are a little bit higher than the dog with too much time on his hands and an out of whack libido... I might even actually go for a human." Joey snapped at him growing increasingly irritable at his arrogance.
"Personally, I find humans highly overrated, but maybe I know this human. I'd say he's about six feet tall, beady brown eyes, blonde hair... what was his name again? Oh, and the answer is... Dawson. Ding! Ding! Ding! What do we have for the winner today?" Pacey's eyes met Joey's with an intense stare that screamed that he knew exactly what Joey was thinking.
"Pacey, I'm getting real tired of you insinuating that there's something going on between me and Dawson because there obviously isn't. His attention is targetted toward Jen. Do you have it straight, Pacey? Or do I need to draw you a diagram?"
"Oh no, Joey... because one part of that diagram would be missing. The line that connects you and Dawson, that unexplainable, hormonal, uncontrollable line. You can't stand the fact that I'm right, can you? Stop dancing around this. Nothing is going to happen unless you get off that high horse of yours and tell him."
Joey's glare told Pacey exactly what he could do with that *high horse*. "I'm outta here." And with that, Joey hauled her books out of the lab.********
As the bell sounded, the students poured out of the classrooms. Dawson feeling rejuvenated after another lecture from his film class caught sight of Jen heading out of math. Running to catch up to her, Dawson's mind raced with how exactly he was going to go about this. Carpe Diem ran through his head, as he got his words out. "Uh- hey, Jen"
"Dawson, hi! How's it going?" she smiled at him leaving Dawson breathless and completely at a loss of words.
"It was-- it is.. I'm good, yeah... good." He could've knocked his head into the cement maybe if he did he'd make a big enough hole that he could crawl into or he could just smash his head against the already dented locker from this morning. Okay, here goes nothing... "Listen, Jen. I know this is a little awkward seeing that we're... seperated, but I was just thinking. It would be fun to go to the Spring Gala together." A hopeful look grazed Dawson's face as his eyes silently pleaded a yes from her.
"Uh, look Dawson..." Jen avoided his look knowing full well what she'd see if she dared look at him. "I don't think that--"
"Just as friends, Jen. Completely... platonic. There'll be no rings or exchaging of any vows. We already know how meaningful those are anyway. What do you say, huh?" Dawson forced her into looking at him by following her eyes.
"Oh... all right. JUST as friends?" she gave in knowing in the back of her mind what might happen. "Absolutely" came Dawson's answer.
Suddenly needing a little space, Jen found her excuse remembering the appointment she'd scheduled with Mr. Williamson. She gave Dawson a hasty I'll-see-you-around and walked toward the classroom leaving him behind.
"Hey Dawson" knocked out of his trance Joey's voice clued him back into reality.
"Oh, hi Joe. Guess what!" Dawson's smile radiated his happiness, and Joey already knew what had happened.
"Oh my gosh, I cannot thank you enough, Joey. If you hadn't said anything, I probably wouldn't even gotten up the courage to ask her. It might've just been me and you. Nah, I know how much you hate those *stuffy* dances." Dawson laughed. "What's up with you?"
Joey bit back her sarcastic remarks just waiting to surface about Dawson's "date" and sighed with relief when Pacey came to Dawson's side (then thought better of it, and planted a scowl on her face).
"Hey, Pacey, you will not believe who I'm going to the Spring Gala with." excitement clearly heard in Dawson's voice. Immediately Pacey looked at Joey, but the look on her face made it clear that Cinderella wouldn't have a fairy godmother that night. As Dawson began rambling on and on, Joey quietly slipped away mumbling something about a project unbeknowest to Dawson who continued on with his incoherent, vocabulary enriched babbling. Pacey caught sight of Joey sneaking away around the corner. With a sigh, Pacey interrupted Dawson's speech and said he'd catch up with him later. Running off, his eyes searched the halls for Joey. All of a sudden, Dawson felt very alone in the middle of the halls. "What'd I say?"******** "Joey! Wait up!"
"Save it, Pacey. I'm not in the mood, and I have to get to class." Joey retorted shoving books into her locker as if there were no tomorrow.
"Well, it's a good thing I came looking for you. Because my confused friend, it's after 6th period. School would be over now."
Joey gave him a sneer, blew it off, and caught sight of the exit sign. While she longed to just run toward it, Pacey cornering her between him and the locker hindered her ability to make an escape. Being stuck between a rock and a hard place, she gave in. "Okay, Pacey. What do you want?"
"What do I want?" Pacey asked almost insulted. "Do you honestly believe I have no tact whatsoever than to just ask you for something after you've so obviously been hurt by our best friend?"
"Yes, Pacey, I do. What do you want?" Joey sighed wanting this conversation to be over.
"Well, if you put it that way then..." Pacey smiled mischievously. "What do you say we go to the Spring Gala together?"
"You think you're so charming, don't you?" she mocked. "What makes you think I'd want to go with you?"
" I AM charming and nothing makes me think you'd want to go with me. Believe me, you could do better. But...it seems Dawson's dance card is filled and well, lucky for you, here I am."
"Thanks, Pacey, but I think I'd rather stay home." She moved to get around him, but with Pacey's cat like reflexes he was quick to corner her again.
"C'mon, we can keep an eye on him... maybe do a little sabotaging. Wink, wink. Hmm? What do you say?"
"If you think I want to be standing around while Dawson sways with Jen in his arms looking all moony eyed as she's...." The look of hurt was evident on her face, but she built the moat guarding her emotions back up again and snapped out of it. "You've got another thing coming Pacey."
"Ahh... so you do harbor some feelings for our future Steven Speilberg. I knew I was right." Pacey's smug smile refused to be wiped off.
Joey just wanting to get out of there gave in. "Yea, Pacey you're right. Whoopee for you. Now can I please go?"
"Just one more thing. I'd like to shine a light of advice into your warped brain. Joey, you've got a lot of things that Jen just doesn't have. You're doing nothing by sulking over him. What's it going to get you by sitting at home every Saturday night?"
I do not sulk... thought Joey as Pacey walked down the hall. Her mind whirling from the advice Pacey, the boy that thought David Copperfield was a biography of the magician, had given her. The thought sickened her when she realized he was right. Instantly she looked up hoping to still see Pacey.
"PACEY!" Pacey turned at the sound of his name. "Pick me up at 7?"
He smiled and nodded. Then he was out the door.
*******
Saturday, already? Joey thought as she started to get ready for the dance. Since a dress didn't exist in her closet, she had to do some last minute shopping with the only money she could spare from her tips at the Icehouse. The dress was silk and as soft as a sigh. Her hair was pulled up and as she walked to the door to meet Pacey, she couldn't help but feel a little self conscious about what she was wearing. Gosh, she felt like a dork pretending to be Cinderella.
Pacey on the other hand was spellbound. This Joey was one that would take a little getting used to. "Wow, I am impressed." Pacey said offering her his arm. "Dissappointed that I showed you up, Pacey?"
"Well, I'll give you this moment in the sun. It's not every day that someone can look as good as Pacey Whitter."
Joey graciously accepted his arm as he escorted her to the car. "Please, Pacey. Do shut up. I was actually starting to admire your suit."
"Oh, by all means, admire. You've got some prime beef hanging on your arm. How lucky you are to have me for a date."
"Pacey, this is not a date. We're simply two people who just happen to be going to the same place in the same car." With that, she slammed the car door shut, and Pacey climbed in next to her.
******
The dance actually got off to a good start. She was actually having a good time with him. Far beyond what she had expected in a "date" with Pacey. She sighed, but the night was still young.... something's bound to happen. Pacey Whitter being a gentleman? I think not.
Pacey stood from the table they were seated at and took Joey's hand. "May I have this dance?" Joey smiled. Why the hell not, Joey thought.
The fast music blared from the speakers. Neither of them were much for dancing. They eyed the other couples out on the dance floor. Looked at each other and laughed as one girl was dancing a little too close to her date.
"She looks like my dog when he gets a little too happy with my leg." Pacey joked as he attempted to find rhythm.
Joey being a little bit better than Pacey took him by the shoulders and tried to keep him going with the beat. As soon as they started to dance though, the song ended and a slow one came on. The deejay announced. "Hey, this one goes out to a special Jen from Dawson."
Joey froze. "Perfect. Just perfect. He would do something like this." She gritted her teeth behind that sardonic smile.
"Maybe we should sit down..." Pacey started to lead her back to the chairs they had just vacated.
"No!" Joey exclaimed adamantly, and she forced herself into his arms.
"Joey, we both know who you're dancing with right now. It's not me you're thinking of." Pacey said as he swayed to the music. Slow dancing... this is what he could do.
"Pacey, I'm not going to let him ruin my evening. I've waited too long for him. I even surprised myself and had fun with you of all people," she confessed. "I hope that was a compliment."
"Just dance," Joey demanded. She leaned her head on his shoulder. Maybe she'd never stop loving Dawson, maybe it was just an inborn part of her, she thought. But that doesn't mean she can't have fun with someone else...
The music continued, and Pacey was beginning to enjoy this. Someone as beautiful as Joey in his arms was something to be proud of. She doesn't look like she's minding either, Pacey thought.
Just then Joey looked up. Glancing around the crowded dance floor, she caught sight of her nightmare. Dawson and Jen not only dancing, but from the looks of it they hand't come up for air in a while. Joey stopped and looked at Pacey. The look of panic on her face made him take a peek at what had shook Joey up so bad. In a second he knew exactly who it was.
"I'm sorry, Pacey," Joey said. "Can we go outside for a little? It's getting too crowded here."
"Yeah, especially with a certain girl named Jen in the room."
All Joey could do was shrug, and he led her out to the punch bowl. He placed a glass in her hand. She accepted it, but her appetite had been chucked out the window as soon as she saw that couple together. Pacey and Joey just stood there in silence. Gradually, the ballad came to an end and a few couples filtered out of the doors to get some air.
"Hey guys!" Jen said excitedly. "Joey, I didn't know you were going to the dance."
"Yeah, neither did I," Dawson mumbled eyeing both Joey and Pacey. "You guys went together?"
Pacey jumped in, "Yeah, let's keep this between just you and me Dawson, but Joey and I have been having an affair for months now."
Leave it to Pacey to fill in my sarcastic comments when I'm speechless. Joey decided to act the part though. Why not? She thought, Dawson doesn't seem to care as long as Jen was his beautiful little arm decoration. "Yeah, I just can't keep my hands off him ever since that night of torrid tongue hockey." She placed herself in his arms and played her half of a cuddly couple role.
"I still have to challenge you to a rematch, baby." Pacey joked along playfully. "You guys, stop!" Dawson interrupted. "It's making me sick."
"Stop what, Dawson?" Joey asked innocently. "What are you talking about?"
"You know that you and Pacey aren't..." "Why not?" Pacey demanded.
"Yeah, why not?" Joey chimed in.
"Because you guys hate each other. You don't... you don't click with him, Joey. " "Oh, so who DO I click with, Dawson?" Joey snapped.
"With.. with.." His mind searched for answers, but none would come out.
"I rest my case. I'll see you around, Dawson." With that, she walked back into the gym. Pacey gave the two a nod, and followed her in.**********
The dance had ended, and Pacey was walking Joey to the door. She could not believe how exhausted she was, but besides that little run in with Dawson, she actually enjoyed herself. Life was full of surprises. She looked up and saw Pacey looking almost handsome in his suit. She smiled to herself. Pacey could be a complete ass sometimes, but he was a good friend. She had to appreciate what he had done for her. For a while, she actually forgot about Dawson... but just for a while. Things always seemed to lead back to him whether she liked it or not. They finally reached her door, and then came the silence... the awkward silence.
"Well, here we are." Joey replied trying to keep things nonchalant yet still panicking. What was she supposed to do next? "Yup, this would be your house..."
"and that would mean, I have to go in," Joey sighed. "Okay, Pacey, here it goes. The whole 'walking to the door at the end of the date' speech. Although I refuse to conform into one of those small minded, superficial, I'm in love with Leonardo DiCaprio teeny boppers we've all come to know and love. All right, Pacey, thanks for taking me out tonight. I had a really... decent time, and I appreciate everything you've done. You made me forget... for a little while."
"Sorry, we couldn't get the hemlock to spice up her punch," he smiled. "Did it help? Even just a little?" Pacey asked his voice etched with concern.
Joey surrendered knowing that she owed him this much. "Yea, it did." That was all that she could give him, and all she would say about it. "Good night, Pacey." She turned and entered her house. Closing the door behind her, she leaned against it overwhelmed with all that had happened that night.
**********
As the door closed in front of him, Pacey let out a breath he wasn't aware he had held in. Sighing, he headed toward the truck and noticed that Joey's light had turned on. He stopped and looked up at it. Spending the night with Joey had made him see even more so than before just how much Dawson was so lucky to have. He started his car and started his trek home.**********
Another day on the job at the video store and Pacey had not said one word to Dawson.
"C'mon, Pace. You're not still mad at what I said at the dance, are you?" Dawson asked knowing he had made a complete idiot of himself and managed to hurt his two best friends that night.
"Yeah, Dawson, I am mad," Pacey stated, with no regard for tact or politeness. Then again, this is Pacey we're talking about. "Okay."
"You don't get it, do you, Dawson?" Pacey said exasperated. "She's in love with you. This is no theory. It's not some hypothesis that hit me from out of the blue. It's pure unadulterated fact." Dawson tried to hide his growing confusion by blowing it off. "Don't do this to her. You of all people should know that she doesn't deserve this."
"Pacey, I just... Okay, when I think of Joey the first word that pops into my mind isn't exactly 'romance.'"
Pacey threw his hands up clearly frustrated at Dawson's stance on the situation. "Then what would you say if I told you that you're too late. That she's tired of waiting on the sidelines for you, and she fell into my arms when you weren't there to hold her?"
The look of hurt was evident on Dawson's face. Frustrated beyond all belief, no words came out to calm the tension racing through his body. He turned to leave and as he reached the exit through the window he saw Joey walking to the store. As soon as she had opened the door, she was faced with Dawson.
"Joey, what are you doing here? What's up?" Dawson asked attempting to hide what had just taken place prior to her entrance into the small video store. "What can I do for you?" "Actually, um, I was here to talk to Pacey..."
The color drained from Dawson's face. "Oh well, he's over there, and I... gotta go. Uh, I'll see ya." Dawson rushed out of the store as Joey looked on perplexed by the way he was acting. She shrugged as she saw him run down the street but she headed down the aisle.
"What was that all about?" Joey inquired retaining her vacant and confused expression. "And what can I do for you, lover?" Pacey asked with amusement.
"Save it, Pacey. I was just on my way to pick up some stuff for Bessie. I just had to tell you that I can't make it to work on our lab today. I need to put in an extra shift at the Icehouse."
"Hmmm... In other words, you want me and want to go to the back room and-"
"Pacey, before you start one of your nasty little sex fantasies, just please spare me the grief and let me leave without experiencing the feeling of my stomach turning over." She was already out the door. "I'll see you around."
**********
Joey finally made it home with a bag of groceries in her hands that effectively blocked her field of vision, but this being Capeside, a town where nothing changes, she could've found her way home without much of a problem. How she would open the door was another story. She shifted her body around in order to reach in her pocket and grab her keys, but keeping her groceries steady and fishing around for keys was easier said than done.
"Here, let me help you with that."
Joey jumped in surprise at the voice coming from the carrots that laid at the top of the grocery bag. Looking farther up, she saw the apologetic face of Dawson Leery. "Dawson? What are you doing here??"
He shrugged in apprehension, "You don't have a closet for me to hide in, and it'll be a cold day in hell before I fit in one of your dresser drawers."
"Dawson..." "Okay, I came to talk and apologize." "Apologize for what?"
"For acting like such a jackass..." Dawson mumbled taking the dent in his masculine pride.
"Dawson, you've been acting like a jackass all of our life, I've gotten used to it," she joked but a glance in his direction and his serious stare silenced her immediately.
"Joey, I've been doing a lot of thinking, and as much as I refuse to believe that things aren't changing. That life hasn't moved anywhere. It's clearly evident that it has. I've always trusted our relationship to be the one constant in my life, the one that I could depend on without a second thought. My life has been such a roller coaster lately, I've needed you more than ever. Although, I haven't been doing such a good job at showing it. Okay, now that there's something new happening with Pacey, I just... I have to let you know this. To be fair to you and I both... Just please understand that this is not some vain and desperate attempt to get you back into my life." Dawson's senseless jargon seemed to miss the confusion showing on Joey's face when he mentioned Pacey. Nevertheless, he continued on. "Things happen to put things into perspective for you, and you don't realize what you've got until it's gone. I can attest to that because the moment I discovered that you and Pacey were... I was so, as immoral as it sounds, overcome with jealousy that I didn't even know what I was doing. I just want you to know that I'm happy for you. You guys are my best friends, why wouldn't I be happy? If he ever hurts you, you know I'll be just across the creek waiting with open arms..."
"Dawson," Joey asked. "What are you talking about? Pacey and I... we aren't..." She shook her head. "and as far as the rest of your speech goes," Joey paused surprised at the answer that seemed so unreal but felt so right. "I won't deny that I have feelings for you, Dawson. I'm flattered that you... feel a part of that for me, but..." She looked up at him. Saying no to this was one of the hardest things she had to do, but she needed to do this. "I can't." "What? Why?" Dawson demanded.
"Dawson, I can't hang on like that. I can't trust that just because you thought I was in love with someone else, you suddenly have feelings for me. You know me, Dawson. I don't settle, and I never will. When are you going to see without impetus from an outside force, that what we have is so... right. If you knew that Pacey and I were just friends as usual, would you be confessing anything, right now?" The silence was enough of an answer for her. "I can't, Dawson. I'm sorry." "So what now, Joey?"
She smiled. "Same old, same old. We remain friends like we always have. I crash at your place for Movie Night, we mock the predictable nature of the people's lives we see on screen, and so on, and so forth." The sound of Alexander crying and Bessie yelling that she was late for work startled her back into reality. "I gotta go. See ya, Dawson."
She made her way inside, and Dawson shoved his hands into his pocket. He turned around and started home.
*********
Alexander had quieted down, and Bessie had left by the time Joey finished putting away the groceries. She sighed, and sat down on the couch. She eyed the phone sitting next to her. Tentatively, she picked the receiver up. Joey dialed the number and waited for someone to pick up.
"Hi, you've reached the Whitter residence. Leave a message at the beep and we'll get right back to you."
Silently, she hung up the phone and laid down on the couch. "Welcome to
life..."