10. Develop Repetitive Stress Disorder from playing Solaire.

9. You've actually figured out a way to get Gilligan off that island.

8. People only come into your office to borrow pencils from your ceiling.

7. To exercise your creative side, you knit a computer cozy.

6. You create on ongoing e-mail dialog with your computer at home.

5. No longer content with merely photo-copying your ass, you now scan it and enhance it with Photoshop.

4. After months of taking frequent breaks, you now require only a single can of cola to belch the names of all seven Dwarves.

3. You discover that staring at your cubicle wall long enough produces images of Elvis.

2. The 18-hole par 3 mini-golf course in your office.

1. The 4th Division of Paperclips has overrun the Pushpin Infantry and General White-Out has called for a new skirmish.