And continuing with more of Grace's "wisdom"...
Moving on technique number 3...
The “I am an Unco” technique
This is the technique upon which I am most familiar with. I mean who else manages to fall down the quad stairs every year despite the yellow sign? (Ask any nsg ‘bout it.) Who else manages to receive birthday cards that say such things as – “I can’t imagine you learning how to drive this year, you can’t even stand up properly on a train without falling over.” - That was from Ka Ho btw. GRRRRR.
Yes. I believe I am the Queen of Unco-ness. So I shall offer my expertise on “accidently” seducing some one out of pure unco-ness. Check this. ~
1. *aCCIdently* spill popcorn onto your subject’s lap...act all flustered ...and then bend your head DOWN to eat it all off ! AHHAHAHA> ..(watch him go HARD) MAuHAUhUAH ~~
2. Spill some kind of sticky substance on your subject. For example coke. It’s always a good excuse to use if you want to lick your subject. If he doesn’t permit you to lick the coke off however, just to spite him you can spit some gum into his direction so it “accidentally” lands directly on him, then sweep your arm past the gum and make contact with it, pretend your arm is stuck to him – haha …he is yours for the rest of the day!
3. Be an unco and accidentally fall on top of him, do this to your subject as much as possible and I promise you that by the 34th time of trying you should at least have established some kind of lip contact, and by the 52nd time of trying you SHOULD at least have some kind of genital line up.
4. If all else fails. ..strip off naked and run around yelling look at me look at me. When he gets embarrassed ...and runs off into some inconspicuous dark alley way ..follow him....corner him. ..and then get *ON THAT HORSEY !!*
Well... uh.. thanQ Grace... I'm sure your advice will come in handy one day... (Quick! Someone get that girl a shot of valium!)