Heero vs. Microsoft
part 03

by: Abra


rating: pg-13

warning: weird, gross ooc, silly,


Friday night...

Heero slunk thourgh the halls of the Micosoft place, no longer clad in the uniform of the corporate drone, but instead in his customary Spandex and tanktop (geeze, where the hell did THAT sentence come from?! Way to eloquent for this fic...).

It was quiet. Very quiet. That kind of dead quiet that you only get at the North Pole in winter at midnight. Okay, maybe not THAT quiet, but still, it was quiet enough that Heero had to be careful even BREATHING, if he wanted to get into the center of the...complex (yeah, okay that works here) unnoticed.

*creep creep [pause] sneak creep sneak sneak*

Heero came to a security checkpoint. He somehow managed to creep up behind the guard, and like, kill him, or knock him out or something.

Anyway, the guard was incapacitated, and Heero input his *coughstolencough* passcode. He continued onward into the deep, dark, dangerous unknown that was the MS place.

*sneak sneak creep [pause] creep creep [pause] sneak*

The hallway ended abruptly, opening out into a kinda...biggish space...sorta...Y'know, the kind with a walkway around the top, and the rest open? Anywhoo, Heero was at one end of the walkway, and the only other door was on the bottom floor, guarded by two...umm...well...GUARDS. And there wasn't any staircase or elevator or anything (don't ask me why-authorised employees get nifty little hover-shoes to get through places like that).

No problem. Heero just jumped down (one or two stories isn't THAT far). He shot the guards with a gun produced from his nifty Spandex Space, and continued deeper into the lair of Bill Gates.

*sneak creep creep sneak [pause] creep sneak creep sneak*

Heero came to another security chackpoint place, this one guarded by these round-robot-laser-turret-thingys stuck in the walls and floor (like the ones in Chrono Trigger). Heero just stood there calmly, as all the lasers missed him (due to the fact that he was carrying a bottle of Relena Extract-Guarunteed to repulse all weapons fire or your money back! And this being the first [and only] time this stuff works, Heero obviously got his money back).

He input another of his nifty hacked security codes, and continued on his merry way. He tippy tippy toed through a teeny weeny back hall, and past some more guards. He crept, and snuck, and tippy toed through a veritable LABYRINTH of halls and security checkpoints, until finally, he came to The Door.

The Door to The Office of Bill Gates (dun dun DUN).

Heero slammed The Door open and...umm...went inside? (Errrrn! Warning! Warning! The Author is suffering from lack of creative words!). Bill gates looked up from his...uhh...computer monitor.

"Can I help you with something?" he asked. Heero aimed his gun at Bill Gates' forehead.

"Omae o korosu," he intoned. Bill gates laughed.

"'I'm going to kill you'? How quaint." Heero gave Bill the Glare of Death (hereafter abbreviated to G.o.D.). Heero glared, and the corporate tycoon/immortal demon didn't even flinch. "I must admit, for a human child, you do posses a modicum of skill." That was it. The final straw. Nobody insulted Heero Yuy and got away with it (umm...Heero...reality check, nobody insulted you). Heero shot Bill Gates many, many times in the head and chest at pointblank range. Aaand...! Ding-dong Bill Gates is dead, Heero shot him in the head. Ding-dong, the Demon Gates is deeeeead! Not.

Actually, when Heero shot him, absolutely nothing happened (think like the Mayor of Sunnydale in the 3rd season of Buffy). Then, the Demon Gates laughed (y'know, one of those deep, evil, villianous laughs), and began growing...........

To be CONTINUED!! ::thunder crashes, lightning flashes, ominous BGM plays, and the author can be seen in front of the TV, taking notes::


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