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Steven's Quotes

famous people

1-"Mother Nature intended it to be, for the snake to eat the rat." - Susan Hawk (Survivor)

2-"I disapprove of what you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - Voltaire (François Marie Arouet)

3-"Hmm, my banjo is wet." - Kermit the Frog

4-"Drama is life with the dull bits cut out." - Sir Alfred Hitchcock

5-"… oh, and Mr. Stamper, would you please kill those bastards!" - Elliot Carver (Tomorrow Never Dies)

6-"My bark is worse than my bite, and my piano playing beats 'em both." - Rowlf

7-"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try." - Homer Simpson

8-"Vergoofin der flicke stoobin mit der børk-børk yubetcha!" - The Swedish Chef

9-"Television has brought back murder into the home- where it belongs." - Sir Alfred Hitchcock

10-"Now, Beakie, we'll just flip this switch and 60,000 refreshing volts of electricity will surge through your body. Ready?" - Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

11-"Everyone is born right-handed… but only the greatest overcome it." - Anonymous

12-"…I'm old enough to know better and young enough no to care." - Garfield

13-"Mr Bond, they have a saying in Chicago: 'Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, the third time it's enemy action.'" - Auric Goldfinger (Goldfinger by Ian Fleming)

14-"World domination! Either that or a nap." - Garfield

15-"There's no point in living if you can't feel alive." - Elektra King (TWINE)

16-That's Jaws. He kills people." - James Bond

17-"This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but to be hurled with great force." - Dorothy Parker

18-"Let them eat cake." - Marie Antoinette (Yes, I know that they can't prove that they actually said it, but I couldn't resist)

19-"What's another word for Thesaurus?" - Stephen Wright

20-"A conclusions is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking." - Anonymous

21-"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle; the other is as though everything is a miracle." - Albert Einstein

22-"Ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put." - Sir Winston Churchill

23-"Education is when you read the fine print. Experience is what you get if you don't." - Pete Seeger

24-"God is subtle but He is not malicious." - Albert Einstein

25-"The first rule of holes: when you're in one, stop digging." - Molly Ivins

26-"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words ... words might hurt me deeply, causing great emotional, mental, and psychological damage leading to a lowered self-esteem and decreased work-related efficiency." - S.T. (I have no idea what S.T. stands for, so don't ask me!)

27-"A wise man washes his hands after he pees. A wiser man doesn't pee on his hands." - Unknown

28-"Its not the winning that counts, nor the taking part; it's making fun of the little fat kid who always comes in last." - Matthew Hansen

29-"Yesterday upon the stair I met a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today; I think he's from the CIA." - Unknown

30-"I am free of all prejudice; I hate everyone equally." - W.C. Fields

31-"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." - Brooke Shields

32-"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes." - Frieda Norris

33-"Though it was unintelligent and stationary, our prey remained elusive…" - A narrator of a nature documentary about mushrooms

34-"There are three types of people in this world: those who can count, and those who cannot." - Carl G. Hostnik

35-"All glory to the Hypno-Toad." - The Judge at the petshow on "Futurama"

36-"Mr. Burns, you mentioned that you wanted an opening tirade?" - Kent Brockman (The Simpsons)

37-"That horse better win, or we're taking a trip to the glue factory... and he won't get to come!" - Homer Simpson

38-"A not unblack dog was chasing a not unsmall rabbit across a not ungreen field." - George Orwell

39-"What people really need is a good listening to." - Mary Lou Casey

40-"When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him." - Heather (Someone that I don't know...)

41-"Never use while sleeping." - The instructions on Conair hair dryer

42-"Never squat with you spurs on." - Cowboy Wisdom

43-"Can anyone tell me the atomic weight of bolonium?" - Mrs. Krobapple (The Simpsons)

44-"It don't make no sense to obey de laws!" - Angry Fisherman on "Rough Cuts"

45-"That depends upon what the definition of "is" is..." - Bill Clinton

46-"You can't judge a place you've never been to! That's what people do in Russia!"- Homer Simpson

47-"Aw, hell! As Shakespeare once said, 'What the f@#k!'" - 'Kate' from Neptune's production of "Sylvia."

48-"Worshipping a dictator is such a pain in the ass." - Chinua Achebe

49-"In Russia, car drives you." - Talking Car from The Family Guy

50-"In Russia, road forks you."

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