Frankly, life keeps getting better for a woman, if she's laid good groundwork, which you clearly have- successful career, good friends, a little romance.
JENNIFER: I have, I guess. Thank you.
Especially when you consider that, techincally, you're first-generation American. Your father was born in Crete and was brought to America when he was ten by his parents, who opened a diner in Eddytown, Pennslyvania. Do you still have family there?
JENNIFER: My grandmother lived there in the same house until she passed away at ninety-four. She was the godmother, the center of the family, amazingly strong. She had the most beautiful skin, the softest thing you ever felt, which I always attribute to her rubbing olive oil on it. Greek mothers really take care of their men, and my father was her only son. I probably shouldn't say this, but they say, 'Never marry a Greek man, because he'll always expect you to wait on him.' (laughs)
Was your father close to his mother?
JENNIFER: Yes. He could do no wrong in her eyes.
Your father is also an actor, mainly soap operas. You were born in Los Angeles, where, I gather, he was working.
JENNIFER: At that point, my father was struggling, doing things like being a door-to-door salesman while my mom modeled and did some acting. Finally, he decided to forget acting and go to medical school; but he was too old to get into universities here, so we oved to Greece for a year when I was five. One day, his agent called and said, 'There's an audition you have to come back for.' So he did and got a job on
Love of Life. From there he went to
Search for Tommorrow and then
Days. Anyway, we all moved to New York in 1976. My brother- who's nine years older than me- wanted to be in sunny California, so he moved to L.A. when he was eighteen.
Describe your father for me.
JENNIFER: Tall, six feet two inches; a gentle giant, really. One of the nicest men you'll ever meet. Unbelievably shy and funny. One thing I remember about my parents, when they were together, is how fun they were.
And your mother, Nancy, what's her backround?
JENNIFER: She's from upstate New York, family of five sisters. My mom's mother left the family when my mother was about age twelve, which was an odd thing at the time.
What a blow that must have been.
JENNIFER: She doesn't talk about it a lot. The family then moved to California, where my mom got a job at Universal, signing Rock Hudson's autograph (laughs). My mom is gorgeous, a pretty thing, so men hired her. She was on
The Red Skeleton Show and had a part on
The Beverly Hillbillies. But she didn't think she was a good actress and quit. What she wanted was to have a family.
What's your mother like?
JENNIFER: My mom is very warm, loving, nurturing, wise. Funny and old-fashioned. She expects respect: "I'm the mother, I'm the elder." It's good she's got her rules, but you also want to go, 'Mom, lighten up, just hang out.'
Were you close?
JENNIFER: We had a good relationship. I wasn't the easiest kid. I was a smartass (laughs). I'm sure there was a lot of strain on her, since it was just she and I.
Your parents' marriage broke up when you were nine. Were you suprised?
JENNIFER: Oh, I was shocked.
How did you find out?
JENNIFER: My mom told me. I went to a birthday party, and when I came back, she said, 'Your father's not going to be around here for a little while.' She didn't say he was gone forever. I don't know if I blocked it, but I just remember sitting there, crying, not understanding that he was gone. I don't know what I did later that night or the next day. I don't remember anything other than it being odd that all of a sudden my father wasn't there. And he was gone for a while.
How long?
JENNIFER: About a year.
You never heard from him once during that period?
JENNIFER: No.
And it was your father who left the marriage?
JENNIFER: Oh, yeah. He left her. There was another woman. That was in November of 1979. Then, in the summer of 1980, there was the other conversation that my mom and I had in the car, which was, 'Your father's with someone else; he's not coming back.'
How long after that did you finally see your dad again?
JENNIFER: About a year. He just called one day and said, 'Let's go see
The Fantasticks.' So we had a little dinner and saw the show. After that, I started seeing him on weekends, and this new way of life just unfolded.
Were you angry or trying to please him so he wouldn't leave again?
JENNIFER: Pleasing, pleasing, pleasing, everything to please.
Did you eventually ask him why he left?
JENNIFER: Sure I did.
Does he explain it well?
JENNIFER: He does. Though not at first. Like I said, he's not a good communicator. Maybe if my parents had talked more. There were signs, but also, knowing my father, he probably didn't say anything. But, as best he could, my dad explained and apologized, and it's enough. We've made up. There's still parts that are hard for me, but I'm an adult. I can't blame my parents anymore.
What has been the most painful time of your life?
JENNIFER: When my dad left. That was very painful.
Did your father eventually marry this woman?
JENNIFER: Yes. They're still married.
And you mother? Did she remarry?
JENNIFER: No. I don't know why. It's a question I always ask her.
And what does she say?
JENNIFER: 'I don't like any of them.' She's too picky, too fickle.
That's a tough situation for an only child, which you were since your brother was living in California. In a sense you had to be both daughter and husband to your mom.
JENNIFER: Yeah. The only resentment I have- and I'm letting go of this one, too- is that I felt, well... it's a big responsibility to think you're responsible for your parent's happiness. And, lots of times, I felt like a middleman taking care of two children.
What did your mother teach you about mothering?
JENNIFER: Love, love, love. Support. Love, love, love.
And your dad, about fatherhood?
JENNIFER: He wasn't around much to do that. Maybe (laughs)- don't marry a Greek man, and just stick around. That'll do it.
Was your mom ever bitter?
JENNIFER: She definitely had moments of bitterness, because she had nowhere to go. And that's hard to watch. I feel like, 'God, Mom, you were robbed of so much opportunity. If you could've had a voice in your ear saying 'Do what you want to do,'' But my mom liked the security of a traditional marriage, didn't mind being the wife with the husband bringing home the bacon.
Your brother wasn't as affected by the breakup?
JENNIFER: No. He felt badly that I was left with the situation while he had the freedom to live his adult life. But he's got his own bag of issues. You can have a crappy childhood and grow up to be a fighter and say, 'I'm not going to let that happen.'
Which is what you did.
JENNIFER: Which is what I did.
Did your father financially support you and your mom?
JENNIFER: Yeah.
But was money an issue?
JENNIFER: Definitely. When you go to dinner, you order what you need and, 'Yes, water will be fine.' We saw theater, but I wasn't allowed to watch TV or see a lot of movies. Since we didn't have a lot of cash, it was more, 'Here's some dolls and crayons to play with.'
How did you feel about money in general?
JENNIFER: I couldn't wait to finally go out and make my own. The idea of never relying on someone else always thrilled me. That way, what's going on between two people is strictly what each is bringing to the other; love, whatever. When you hear people say, 'I can't leave because of money,' I mean, dear God. I don't want any relationship to be about money. It's too corrupt.
JENNIFER: Where did you and your mother live?
We lived on Ninety-second street and Columbus Avenue, which at the time was pretty seedy. But for me it was amazing (laughs)- you could see the Empire State Building. It was in, like, a project, but it was beautiful. (Laughs) I wouldn't change anything. As much as I curse my parents at times, I also thank them for all of it.
END