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By grace you are saved never by faith, by grace. And you read it how often?(voices in response) You were in fact, as Gayle pointed out, kept in restraint



Secion 1 Part 1

By Grace you are saved never by faith ..by grace
You’ve heard it how often? (a bunch of times) You were in fact, as Gayle pointed out, kept in
restraint. You were kept under tutors until this day. There is also, in no way to excuse my
...error...There is also an amazing working of God in all this it's, not to excuse at all...not to
excuse me at all.....That’s one will have to get into...there is this in Job “ Behold you have
instructed many and now it has come to you.” “Nevertheless if the Son makes you free,
you will be free indeed...(thank you Jesus) A child as long as he is a child is no better than
a slave...he is under tutors until the day the father appoints...you better be glad you
were..and there is this too...you better be glad you were...the alternative is
worse..appauling as this is... If I hadn’t grabbed you ...what then?( saved from my own
backsliding...I can see in my own life where I was headed, I might be dead...I can honestly say I might be physically dead)
Yet as I said all along..but my spirit didn’t mean it ..it’s not me doing it ..it’s God doing it...and it was!

You’ve all been  reading Romans a lot lately(yes)...you’ve all been reading Romans a lot(yes)..and could not notice this? well , it is clear that God has decided that it is time for you to transfer your allegiance, if that’s the word, from my spirit to His Spirit(yes..thank you Jesus).   there are deeply ingrained ideas and feelings..running wild in our fellowship,many of them directly or indirectly can be traced back to my error. Everything has to be re-examined. And this is a good time to do it...What has happened is this..this is another set of..some sort of ah   ah...some sort of tying my error to your problem....and ..ah..how do you think I’m doing Gayle?.....

Gayle:  I’m not really sure”..
.Stewart: in speaking anyways....
Gayle: no answer.....
Stewart: I have been unable to speak almost right Gayle?
Gayle: yeah
It is again only His grace that I am even  physically able to speak right now.. that is coherent...I have been a help in many ways..but have torn down in others...we have come to depend on faith instead of Jesus.....by faith....the stress is subtle yes...  “it’s up to you and your faith”...is that the idea that you have?(yes)...Somehow I cheerily bounded off
with that idea...and the brothers couldn’t keep up with me...faith in His love but it’s up to you...somehow...these are absurdities...Why did God allow this?  You think it must be because of wrong in me...”(yeah,muttering) this illness is not unto death..it is for the glory of God”... yer saying that kind of thing?  Unless...then there’s me ...how can this be?
Furthermore....Furthermore.. let us let us erase this whole meeting now...this has never happened....even so I would not rightly..now again..forget the wrong... but I was not rightly strengthening the brothers... you don’t think so? see you say “oh you’ve been so much help.” go ahead say it...(yeah yes)....it  yet remains it’s not true...I haven’t been...what then?...Jesus told the parable...there was a rich man...with a trunk put all kinds of money in...and the woman put one penny in...now what’s the point?(guessing) I could cheerily keep going this way I could..I could cheerily keep going..but in affect I was just saying to the brothers..what it comes down to whether I thought I was doing what it comes down to is saying”well..it’s up to you..you gotta be faithful”and so forth.  So where is strengthening the brothers the real way?It isn't. Strengthening the brothers in faith that you are his chosen..first and foremost...and I am not ..to my shame.  building up on the one hand and tearing down with the other..bull in a china shop..I hear my friend back there.....it really has been...and I want you to know something else...are you listening?(yes) you must understand this..how...hard to believe again...this is nothing...there is a real way in which I have been as or more a victim than you ...now think of that...you didn’t waste 25 years...and had he not rescued me as he rescued you a short while ago... I wonder what would have become of you...it was that bad. Getting that bad...this has been a stumbling block for all of us including me...poison talk... “ God gives you what you need to get started and then it’s up to you” ...my my ...look...how easily everyone is returning now..how easily!(yes). Why is it so easy? They are returning so easy. Because He’s doing it(yes..yeah).And all this error...he is overlooking as it were and bringing us back... but enough is enough. Putting to death “I can do this part over here myself.” I can see that working in me. That's what the brothers...and I would forever teach about Samson...and I am the most...and I’m not a hypocriteI’m not a hypocrite...you understand this? (yeah) you don’t get that?(yes) How many of you don’t? He doesn’t. How many don’t understand that? Gayle how bout you defend me..
Gayle : because um in teaching about Samsom the way that Stewart
Stewart: while I just....I did it in ignorance
Gayle: Yeah the way he was doing it himself...
Stewart: a hypocrite knows he was
Brothers and sisters: right yes yeah
Gayle: Nobody was telling him “Look, yer doing it this way..and there was nobody telling him....
 Sister 1:  Nobody tried telling Stewart before? I just find it hard to believe
Stewart: Let’s hear it.
Sister 1:(I don’t want to be judgmental)..
Stew: yeah Let’s hear it
Sister 1: I find it hard to believe ..So many brothers talked about it...I was always under the impression that they wrote you letters and tried to tell you, I mean that’s what I always heard..........and I don’t even know the whole truth, but David Wilkerson told brothers and sisters that he tried to talk to you and that you wouldn’t listen to him, I don’t want to be judgmental,I know I have a lot of faults too..I just think you had to have some clue..you pushed everybody away and made it so hard for everyone to talk to you
Part 2 of the Grace Meeting
Stewart: And you’re glad I did to, aren’t you?
Sister 1: yeah but I..
Stewart: Listen..,Let’s start over..you said “A lot of brothers and sisters think about this..No they don’t. They never never never thought that this was bad. No they never thought they thought there was something wrong of course! Of Course! there’s someth.. they didn’t think anything of this. And neither did I. Now you say didn’t anyone try to talk to me. Well friends like him. “How you have helped me,” and David Wilkerson...well  I don’t remember..this was 25 years ago?(yeah) And if my old wine is this bad what must the new wine have been? I don’t know what I was doing with him...I don't remember anyway .I don’t know what I was trying to say..it maybe as bad as him..I don’t know. there is this also. Me and other Christians. You know that scripture “ Woe to him who is alone when he falls.”(yes) Well I know that scripture, you don’t. I know that now. You don’t know what that means. Why am I alone? Why is it that there is no fellowship between me and other Christians? First of all, I gave up long ago. That was my sincere claim. But why , what was the trouble in the first place? Perhaps it was..while insisting...perhaps they were trying to land me with grace..now I doubt it...now I doubt it. But! it may have been, that may have been the case.  Perhaps someone did somewhere, had to have been way back. Perhaps someone did try. Perhaps someone noticed. I have no way of dealing with it. No memory no...I repeat what I said , I think if you showed this, they would murmur nice things instead of throw up. What do you think?(yes yeah) Well try it! Try whoever can..you want to..  
Brother 1: I did show somebody and they thought it was wonderful..
Stewart: I am afraid that’s what would happen...I am afraid that’s what would happen But you know , but you know it isn’t right to do really. Because then it is to their shame.Yer just sticking pins in em. And even if you then try to argue and correct them as I might have done 20, 25 years ago tried to do...for an argument , to learn, some such thing....Let’s hear some more what you find hard to believe..cuz I do too.
Sister 2: I find it hard to believe...how I often...and we all so often say “By the Grace of God....and hearing you speak to us...I now see how those words were empty
Stewart: that’s right
Sister 2: I wasn’t conscience of what I was really saying, just what I was taught

Stewart: And who is the emptiest of all....me....I was devoid, I was unconscience of grace. I really wonder if some of you were more aware of grace than I. I really think so because   it’s zero with me.

Sister 3 : I remember too

Stewart: There might as well  not  been the word in the bible. You never heard me say 2 words. Did you ever discuss grace, anyone of you?(yes) Wait a minute, wait a minute, she’s first anyway, wait a minute, listen , did any of you ,just raise your hand, did any of you discuss grace a year ago and more with anybody? Well then yer way ahead of me!... way ahead right there. Because , to you , the word existed and that’s way ahead of me.

SECTION 1 concluded

gracemtg2 The
   Grace
       Meeting
SECTION 2

 
 
       the (    ) are the voices of the brothers and sisters collectively

SECTION 2 of the Grace Meeting 1989

Sister 3:I remember about 10 years ago..um the sisters and brothers in New York found
some Brother Monbleau ..Wayne Monbleau..and his whole teaching was based on
grace..the grace of God..and they would all talk about the grace of God and everybody
there, everybody in New York would like mock them and put them down and ..I really don’t
know.... that's what I remember

Bobby Whiple: I just heard him on the radio

Stewart: ehuh?

Bobby: I just heard him on the radio on the  way here , I don't know , some of the things he says...

Stewart: And?

Bobby:: He does speak of the grace of God

Stewart: you know something else even more appalling? All these subjects, many of the
subjects dealing with God’s grace are in fact fairly accurately dealt with here, everything
around grace, but grace doesn’t exist..that’s that’s more amazing God’s love is in here all
over and Relying on Him....you see God was eh ..heh..I guess ah..I guess they are all
running out now..it’s getting too boring...(nooooo) apparently(no) Listen..God was
revealing to me over some time when I said ya know back  Jan 1 when I said “He was restoring
me too, I didn’t know the tenth of it, I didn’t know the tenth of it. Nevertheless um Gayle
has been reading the bible studies recently, all the bible studies and see how its working
towards grace and the subjects around it.... hard to even say...I don’t know what the
sessions are...I knew I didn’t know what they were...God was bringing us to the real basis.
I was selling righteousness comes from faith...therefore...it’s through faith, not from or by.

Victor Trapani: I have a question, When I was younger in Jesus I would meet a lot of
other Christians and I would hear them talk about this exact thing about the grace of God,
and even though they would tell me about it I would say I understood it, it never really
clicked until 2 months ago, so I think it was Jesus Himself revealing it to me personally at
the time when He chose to

Stewart: All right whenever you say that that you also have to come back to the other
side, it’s also my spirit pushing it out of you and saying “don’t listen to
that”(yeah..yes)How much of that was it too?(yeah yes) You know there are ways
..different ways to look at it.

Brother 2: I remember I used to read alot of Charles Spurgeon and he’d talk about grace,
and I would just think “ well it’s 100 years later Jesus has showed us more now

Stewart: uuugh!

Brother 3:I think he must be in error...ya know that’s what I would that’s what I would
think ...somehow ..I would really wonder about what you would say about what he said
there

Stewart: How much is it  I could clamor and I could gallop and skip along in my merry
way and the brothers couldn’t keep up with me(a lot a whole lot) It was my merry
way..that is in what I was doing wrong...don’t forget also..Jesus used me a lot (yes...sure)
in spite but it was in spite ....and if that isn’t His grace..according to the bible  what is? His
kindness ya know.. His grace was extended to us while we were enemies...Now, we must
really get into grace(yeah yes) I mean really....try this saying...There is something to
this...Now Grace, Faith and spirit, small s, these three abide, but the greatest of these is
grace....small s....small S eh..we”ll have to get into that. Wine is treacherous....Now
here’s what happens...Let’s take those three...Grace, Faith, and spirit...there’s a lot of, are
you paying attention, (yes) There’s all of churches overboard on spirit matters. You now
know of a church overboard on faith...there are in fact apparently, recently I have been
inquiring, that there are some overboard on grace, to the extent that they to the extent that
they claim to  do away with baptism. you know you can be lopsided any way?(yeah) Nevertheless
those 3 exist.... Grace , faith and spirit..all of them are important. And they have to be in
the right balance. And they certainly haven’t been here...and therefore I have no idea, I
have no idea in the light of the truth I have no idea about other churches, you know I have
to say that...I have no idea...because anyway I would have looked at them, would have
been in error. Follow? (yes) spirit had better not be the basis, because it’s just an anything
goes..Faith can’t be the basis because then it’s hard work. Grace is the basis. It’s not on
the basis of works but of grace. Grace must be the basis. Anyways....Romans 10 “...a zeal
for God but it is not enlightened.” speaking of the Jews....I have heard it said “Am I some
sort of Old Testament character....maybe there’s something to that...being ignorant of the
righteousness that comes from God and seeking to establish their own...now..that had to
be true of me...to some extent...partly the problem ignorance, non-enlightened Samaritan
doing both at once....I began speaking about relying on Jesus...The big thing is that you
have to remove the phony relying on faith before you could actually rely on
Jesus...How much are you relying on Faith?(weak muttering) You see, in other words,
here’s another explanation. In some sense or other I have a framework somehow, that I
can keep going...does that make any sense?..That you don’t have. I wasn’t seeing grace,
Nevertheless I could include enough of it in some sort of pseudo-framework  to ah..keep
going..enough to ah seem right...got it?(yes) How can you rely on Jesus with some sort of
“It’s up to me” feeling?( can’t)..contradictory....now a double problem...yanking grace out
of scripture...especially out of those three, Grace , faith and spirit...yank grace
out....you’ve done 2 things, 2 problems. First , you’ve changed...by removing
grace...what’s left is changed...but it’s also damaged. You can’t yank something out of
something without damaging what’s left...it's it's..there are two things...there’s a
vacuum....and there’s damage. Do you follow? (yes)You can see that having happened.

Part 3 of the Grace Meeting

That is , violence has been done to faith and spirit too! And then....the actual wrong came
in which is relying on faith.....to the point(sighing) I was right...you are saved by faith, by
the way that’s in the summary....it’s both. Twice, we are saved by faith, don’t you people
ever check your bible?(yes)

I wonder if you have more appreciation of the working of God’s grace among us
now?(yes) Grace enough to overcome this sin. Where sin abounds , grace abounds all the
more. Shall we therefore sin...God knows that I did it in ignorance...I didn’t plan this...I
assume that you all know that(yes)
What about another explanation.....as he said.. without such a foundation..means that
there is no framework, there is no sight of the framework....everything is sort of
disconnected in a strange feeling kinda way, and every week it is a new direction and
teaching and it isn’t connected to the foundation, the basis which is grace....which is the
way it must be.....minus grace ..all the good things are floating. And how do you ever tie
them together? Well you couldn’t but I quote could. In some sort of a running on
automatic pilot....do you start to get a picture?(yes) There’s no confidence
therefore...confidence is a Big word....big....or..as it is written...”how come they never
marry.?”.....for that one alone I repent...for that one alone....Because you have to be like
Stewart first(yeah)....and the amazing marriage that He has given me...which is near
per...not me.....I’m far from perfect..in fact, Gayle is close to perfect...did you ever hear..I
heard some of you people say “ She’s not , she’s like not human.”(yes laughing) that
marriage itself is nothing but the grace of God. Nothing but. In fact she looked up and
found, “ He who finds a wife”, it’s very close, by the way, grace , what is grace? we’ll
have to get into that(undeserved ..undeserved mercy) hold  it hold it hold it, that is the
stupidest thing there is, I say , with my fervent spirit, undeserved mercy...that is stupid to
talk like that, because mercy is never mercy if it is deserved....so you’re saying mercy is
mercy when you’re saying Mercy is undeserved mercy.....fix your brain..in order for to be
mercy otherwise grace would no longer be grace...in order to be mercy it can’t be
deserved...

This is the beginning of Grace CUT 5

or it isn’t mercy...What is this stupid undeserved mercy...and that is what
people say!!(yeah yeah)Listen Listen..it doesn’t even make sense...just in words.....Oh
maybe you do deserve some other kind of mercy..do you?(nooo)well..what is this? now think
about it....You know I haven’t lost my confidence..my confidence is in Jesus...now where
it should have been all along but it wasn’t ....and therefore I confidently will say that...what
is this undeserved mercy? Get your head screwed on!  Noo?! (yes) Now think about it...
Mercy is mercy is all yer sayin.....you don’t get it?(yeyyss..noo)If eh rather eh Grace is
mercy..yer saying Grace is mercy yer saying Grace equals mercy and it doesn’t....They are
two different things....Grace is something...and it is certainly undeserved as all mercy is..or
it wouldn’t be mercy....now anyway..anyway...um..anyway...what was I saying before
about that...oh yeah “he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor, now grace
is close to favor...close...it’s not...but that's approach..that’s one of the words that are
around grace...that you’ve found favor...that He has extended his grace ..although the
grace of God and the grace of Jesus Christ too,by the way, two different things....we gotta
get into this...see somehow I got saved....And I still think I got saved...I still think I got
saved. did I get saved two weeks ago? Well I think I have to say I got saved 25 years
ago...I think... but that’s another matter...I got saved or whatever....and right away...right
away...ahh....again you know, ..there’s another thing. I bought a bill of goods in a way
....because what does everybody do...you get saved....and then you go to
church...and that’s about it....anyway..ahh..something like that..I got saved and I lost
interest in ..that's ..I don’t remember doing it , I’m saying...I must have something like lost
interest in salvation...it was no longer interesting...now well it’s over..I mean ah...and I
must have been acting something like that...perhaps having bought that picked that
up..who knows..anyway...that’s something...in that area...well all right it’s no longer
interesting....so now I’ll get in the Old Testament now I’ll start interpreting...and that’s
what happened...it was a process..iin the process since....and uh got into interpreting this
and interpreting that and and Matthew 24....meanwhile the most important teaching of all,
salvation, and the most important part of the most important teaching was nowhere.  An
nobody noticed. Now, in a nutshell, that’s a process sense...dya
follow?(yes) that’s partly what happened....Yes..eh..Gayle thought studying Matthew 24
would do that...over the years ..how many secretly dreaded it because fear   “I could
loose my salvation, with such an extreme testing , will I make it? (yeah yeashyes)”.....it's up to me(voices in response)

and you know it’s the brothers ...again...that may ..that particular one maybe even worse
with the sisters...perhaps...there feeling reaction to it might be worse...but ya know it’s
still the brothers...If ..if our life is based on works...that faith becomes works
somehow...that’s just it ..That's more telling on the brothers...and it’s the brothers therefore
that um...that’s why I have been speaking of the brothers being set free...think it’s true?
(yes)...Without grace you’re on a crossing your fingers basis. I asked a while ago
 “Are you trying to talk Jesus into saving you?” Remember..(yes)  trying to convince him
into saving you. (yes) my goodness...

Ya know the whole while, I never tried to take Jesus' place.. in no way and would always
speaking against it...and yet that’s what the devil arranged...now think about it...something
like that in effect....Without grace the chain of how everything connects to Jesus is broken.
So all becomes mysterious..grace is meant to be the the uh framework, format....I’m saying
"salvation is a gift while under the counter you have to earn it by faith." Why don’t the
brothers marry, because they have no confidence. Why don’t they have confidence,
because of their impossible task....what do you think of that brothers?...(yes yeah makes a
lot of sense)...

Brother 4: Many of the ones that are married, their marriages aren't very good because of the
same problem...

STEWART: Faith has become almost an end in itself ...how’s that?(yeas) one of the translations calls it
the instrument...the tool....by the way I wonder ..Gayle?  y'know there are of course a lot of salvation
tracts floating around ..you pick em up right?(yes) Are they all the very same thing?(pretty much)
that It’s faith, faith, faith, that it’s never grace? (nooo, it’s grace yeah grace) huh? There is grace?
(yeah yes yeah)....well I picked one up..I saw one yesterday, it was zero grace....or a few days ago
.there certainly must be grace....

Brother 5: isn’t even the King James text...doesn't it say something the word it, don’t they say...
“it is through grace you are saved by faith?

Stewart: Yeah..same thing..that’s Revised...same thing...
(noo no, it’s by grace ..)

Stewart: say again...say again..I can’t hear ya

Brother 5:: I thought the kings James Version as I have seen it on those tracts.said. “By Grace
you have been saved through faith..the KJV
(wait..wait...you changed it ...you said it differently the first time Adrian)

Stewart : It says  "by" ..I’ll bet ya..it says "by grace through faith.."(right) Faith is the lesser and
Grace is the greater, doesn’t matter what translation...(yeah) that’ll come out...Grace is
the basis... ..all the faith in the world...and if He doesn’t extend His grace....Now ..that’s
jumping the gun... without grace as the basis...Be zealous to confirm your call and election
becomes trying to convince Jesus to save you(yes)... because the fact that nobody is
picking up on grace.. and you haven’t been...You haven’t been picking up on it... the fact that
nobody’s been picking up on it...as much as I have already gone into it...shows how
deeply  everyone is into “Faith, it’s up to me”ecetera...instilled in...

end of CUT 5

CUT 6

think a that...

There is no receiving His grace with thanksgiving.... which is almost the basis of Christian
life....Christian Life..that’s right...where’s Orange...now..no grace...Does the word grace
appear anywhere...just the word...let alone ...I’ll bet it doesn’t....Things we looked at...it
doesn’t...

We got a long way to go, people ..are you getting restless?(noooo) Notice there
is a lot of running out..(yes...maybe take a 10 minute break....) It’s 5:00 now....We can
either keep going or take a break or break for supper(brwaksupp 10min, go for a while why don't we take a vote, go till supper? )
)Well...well...we could take a vote...remembering that for freedom(everyone together)

Part 4 of the Grace Meeting Christ has set us free(thank you Jesus) what’s the rest though..(everyone) Stand fast
therefore and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.) To a Yoke of..? (slavery) To a yoke
of salvation by faith "quote" "works".... Are the brothers starting to realize how Jesus is starting
to set all of US! free?(yeees) how many are only starting to?(just a little) how many think they half
understand it pretty much?...well... That's that’s getting there...Now let’s vote...on the break or
keep going....keep going such as...I mean I don’t want to dwell on me..but aah...up to a
point it’s important...the way I have operated...my spirit.....what God is doing with
me...how He’s been leading me...and then finally ...the right view and balance that’s a big
one..what is the right ..what is right then?... well starting that... and about grace... and
other smaller things...or should we take a break?....(take a break) or should we take supper?
( supper)... now what is God’s will?(supper, I think it's God's will to keep going,)(Why don’t we take a vote?)

Cut 6 stops here at 3 minutes 50 sec. The 1st tape keeps going here


you see when you sing amazing grace...doesn’t really hit you huh?(yes it does..no, no)take
a vote on it then(yes)...how many say we break for supper now? how many say we take a 10
minute break?...How many say no break and no supper?(laughter) Well it’s pretty obvious
that most want a break....(yes) right?(yes) so everybody vote on a 10 minute break or a
supper break(yeah) is supper ready?

Vinnie: Yeah ...if were gonna have a break I think it should be for supper, because if we
go on to 7:00 its ahh it makes things..hard..the food will be getting messed up(laughter)

okay you ready? how is that pure Vinnie and our fellowship? Well ...life and actions are to
be interpreted in terms of the nearest circumstance only and we must act on the basis of
the closest circumstance....never raise up our eyes into the context of greater things....ahh
now supper is pretty great that’s true but  but..(laughter) there may be even greater
things...pitiful little “it’s gonna get messed up.” (laughter)....Take courage Vinnie! Take
courage(laughter) see I’m strengthening the brothers!(laughter) Take courage...

Vinnie: stupid thing I said...
Brother: (to Vinnie)Don't worry

Listen ah..let’s all vote on a 10 minute break or a supper break...Are we all ready? (yes)
How many say a supper break now?(clamor) well..and how many say a 10 minute break?
well they lost(laughing) Well since it’s everybody and I don’t know a reason why to do
otherwise..maybe a supper break..we can agree on that then( yes) what do you think?
(yes) what do you think about this meeting?(praise God thank you Jesus....)

Never would have thought of it... (nooo)

Denny Dennison: I always thought that we consciously as a fellowship
never got into grace because of the potential to take advantage which I always saw in the
other churches

Stewart: Hey..there’s a huge potential to take advantage..but tough luck ..that is the route
we must go(yes) cuz that’s the bible route...that is...yes there is a huge potential...we’ll
have to get into that...you never would have thought this...it’s a big surprise(yes)....

Brother 6: yeah ..we went to see a brothers last night in Brighton Beach

Stewart: Can’t hear a word yer mumbling...

Brother 6: okay We went to see some brothers in Brighton Beach last night and I
remembering saying “yo ..Jesus is...brother Stewart Jesus has been saving him too.

Stewart: already did at least two weeks ago(thank you Jesus)...His grace is greater than my
shame or my error(thank you Jesus...yeah praise God) the next time you’re afraid to make
a mistake...because you’re afraid to, in sincerity, do what really looks ruuu ..do what
really looks right, really checked..eh really looks right...His grace if if ya are wrong His
grace is greater anyway(thank you Jesus) TWENTY FIVE YEARS OF ERROR?
...you try to beat that(laughter) 25 years of colossal error....

Brother 7: I read about..

Stewart: this is no little point..(yeah) Sonya says I should expound on grace
more..remember? That’s the ans ah taloola..you’re the one ..expound on grace more..he
ha ..that’s the answer huh? MYYYYY...it’s an awful lot more than that...this mortal sin...I
thought that was a big deal..I made a mistake...I did...Ha I thought that I was... I bought a
bill of goods. That was awful...but that wasn’t even the tip of the iceberg...remember that?(yes) once in a
lifetime bible study I called it..remember?(yes)Oh my goodness....It is very very hard... a
month from now you try to picture somebody...actually being oblivious to grace...and is
fervent in Jesus as I have been...and put that together...a month from now ..you try and
figure that out..impossible....which leads you to wonder...God purposely made me blind to
it..."so I am not responsible"(stewart in a mocking tone)..eh pa..purposely made me blind to it..etc.. but ah....needs to
understand when I said I’m glad it’s that bad because it’s proof ..it’s my written
evidence..what I already know in my spirit...that I didn’t do it... I did it in
ignorance...there’s the proof....it’s not there...if it was half there messed up...that might
make me wonder....so I’m glad it’s that bad...it’s zero...you don’t get it huh?(yeas)  a lot
more to it...what do you think about this..(thank you Jesus....) later we will have to discuss
your forgiveness of me or the  lack of it...that’s a subject.... now are we all ready to pray
together?(yes).....
(after prayer)

Mike Montoya interrupting: Does anyone else find this incredible? That Stewart would treat Forgiveness for 17 years of false teaching,  verbal and emotional abuse as a topic??!?!?!?


Brother 7: it’s gonna take a while to digest...

Brother 8:: For me , it shows how much Jesus loves you fiercely..

Stewart: Boy ...that is my hope right there...it is said “He has become my salvation”....that
I dare trust him...what He has done for me...even through this....

Brother 9: Seems to me, like a beginning, a beginning of a better relationship with Jesus
and with each other(yes)

Stewart: based on the sufficiency of His grace(thank you Jesus)

Lauren Albrecht: I’m not sure but I, I heard that the man that wrote or that
Jesus gave the words to  Amazing Grace, that he was a Christian for a long time and came
to the realization that he was on the wrong basis..and that..

Stewart: really?

 Lauren: God gave him the words that God marked him with Amazing Grace

Brother 10: there’s a little more than that..

Stewart: is that right?

Brother 11: Actually...he  was a seafarer.. and he dealt in slavery, he was a Christian and
he backslid very grossly and he came back to God and the last part of his life, he was
extremely faithful..and close to Jesus but he used to deal in slavery

Bobby Whipple: He was He was in a very serious He was in the Church of England, they
thought he committed apostasy...they told him he was finished and ah...because of all the
sins that he chose..serious sin he was into when he was in Africa

Brother 11: Drinking and slavery

Bobby: then he uh called out ta, he did call out to God and Jesus forgave him and that’s
why he wrote the song..Amazing Grace .(wow...thank you Jesus)

Stewart: so you see he..he..again...you know we gotta change everything,...He called out
to God...he put his faith in God’s grace..

Bobby: yeah

Stewart: and then called out to God....is what yer saying(yeah yeah) And he knew that that’s
what he was was doing then.....same as me....Let’s hear some more brothers and sisters.....

Brother 12 : I know when I was backsliden  it seems ah, the times when I could see Grace
most clearly in fact, ah pretty much the only times that I considered it  was when I was the
very most out of it..with the noose around my neck and the rope broke

Brother 13: physically

Brother12 : I considered his grace a lot more than I considered my faith at that point

Stewart: that makes sense

Brother 14: I saw God's grace when He made me trust him with 3 children....and I ...will continue

Stewart: (whispering) that's His mercy...

Brother 15: I think that God has let this happen this long....and what is His plan for us(yeah yes..muttering thank you Jesus)

Bob Muller: It is his grace that brought us safe thus far...(and grace willl bring me home...praise God ..thank you Jesus)

Stewart: You don't have the view that Salvation is over and done with..?(starting to..starting to now..muttering) Right kind of view of that... Otherwise Grace would no longer be grace...

Stewart: Now, you must understand, I'm not a fraud. I'm not a phony. I'm not a Jim Jones as they say. I'm not a false teacher. What I am is a poor one. I said I was glad, glad, that it's this bad. Job said, "Make me know how I have erred." He said, "If only God would write the indictment, I'd be proud of it."Well, I didn't, He didn't have to write the indictment, I did. Furthermore,........................by the way, I was reading a while ago that bad memory that I'm extremely having..I was reading that this is due to stress and what was the other one? stress and something like that. Job said, "Make me know how I have erred." Also, "Those who err in spirit will come to understanding. We'll have to get into, somehow it's my spirit, somehow I erred in spirit. before erring in words. But um, oh yes, I'm glad, I'm glad that it's that bad, trying to put in why, because it is written proof to my sanity that indeed I did it in ignorance. That is, I can see, had I had I tried to deceive, I wonder if I could have done it as well. I tried to remove grace this well, leave no traces, tried to make some weird thing, which I , even I can't say I did, when I see how well it is done. that uh..that's the reason that I have received mercy. right there. It is that I did it in ignorance. colossal eh colossal thing that is that "sin abounds, grace abounds all the more. The subject to which I was oblivious for 25 years while getting more of it all the time. This subject, my error, was the subject of grace. We'll get into that later. The Language....but uh shows all the more that it's by His grace that He shows me, no one else did. Only He could have, I couldn't, I didn't. The fact that He showed me and at this point in time. You say breaking down, you don't know how badly I was breaking down. At this point in time when He's clearly uh rescuing us all, He rescued me. I mean rescued. I wonder if "petering" I wonder. I was petering out. I wonder if that word actually means, actually comes from Peter's problem which is my problem. partly.

All these things these ills from the brothers at least are made worse by me everyone of them.

Brother: All of them?

Stewart: All these things, I think everything. Maybe everything. But certainly a lot and at least I've been making it worse. Well, His grace toward me. The fact that I, that I can exist... you know, you may not have thought of it yet, He could have rescued, He could have wiped me out and rescued the church very easily. He could've anyone. I was oblivious. I don't know how it could happen. But in fact, you knew it, I was oblivious to grace. It's one of the two. I was oblivious to grace or have totally being, total deceiver the whole while. It's one of the two. When you read, do you understand, that we looked in this book and cannot find the word grace, except in the middle of of Faith in your Salvation, quotes the verse, "For by grace are you saved" and that makes it worse yet and and totally oblivious to it everywhere else......what?

Andrew: and then it's all us got to have got to have faith

Stewart: Faith has become, so-called faith has become everything. Therefore, it's on me. We'll get into, "I could take it, the brothers couldn't" I could take it for longer. that's all.

Brother: well I tell ya I seen grace at work in my life and in a lot of us when I rededicated, I knew it was nothing I did and with a lot of brothers who returned I could see it was a big example of God's grace, Him doing that, I think specifically to show His grace that He has on us. I think about that a lot. ( voices in agreement)

Stewart: I have not been acknowledging His grace. Not in my, not in my own life. Not making it known. Still can't believe that I did it. I have to of course. While we're on the subject. When did I ever speak on the subject of my sinfulness? (murmurs of " I would say never, never really")

Brother: I remember you telling us once that if we lived inside your body for a minute we would go crazy.

Stewart: Did I? (yeah, yes)

Brother: I remember you saying a few times that "I was the worst one among you."

Stewart: Yeah, I said it a thousand times. I'm no better. But nobody believed it. (right right, that you had so much faith) "Because I have so much faith, because I can take it. heh. uh... I said a thousand times I'm no better. But somehow my spirit is selling that I'm sinless.(yeah, yeah true) therefore the brothers must be sinless like Stewart and everything will be alright. (right, right) and many such things, many such proofs. I have a boxful now. Along with a last little pack at the end, "Maybe it wouldn't have mattered anyway." That is a, a ah..is it perverse or is it something else? It's now that it really matters. The older brothers. How much difference would it have made. That's a good question. Try try anyway with your next 18 year old. one would think it doesn't matter what you say. However, be that as it may, it's with the older brothers that uh, it becomes extreme.

Cut 2

Stewart: When did you hear me say much at all on the subject of repentance?( voices mixed)

Brother: It always seemed up to us. We had to do it. Grace wasn't talked about in repentance.( voices, "I might be mistaken but I think quite a bit,"perhaps he's talking about repentance

Stewart: I think I've repented more in the last 2 weeks and then 2 months and then a hundred times more than eh than everythi everything else put together until I wondered what has been going on. y'know I, I am given to dramatic exaggerations to make a point. I'm not exaggerating. I am not exaggerating. We as a church to this moment, and that's another one, when, where, and how did we become a church, if we ever did, when where and how does any church become a church if and when it does? And for that matter, Where, when, and how if there is a where, when, and how is someone born again or are they saved? A lot of this is ah...We have to redo everything...from the bottom up. And that is no exaggeration. Grace is much more important than faith. And that was completely turned around. And more than that. We as a church to this moment have no appreciation of grace.

Look at this. I practically said what it was and what you heard the last 2 months and you still didn't go to, grace is the problem.(coughing) Haven't you looked in these books lately and noticed there's no grace?(yeah, no no) with all the grace talk (sounded so good) What sounded so good?(you know something something that's) How many did, by the way, and didn't say it? How many of you thought, the problem is grace? There is no grace. y'didn't say it.

Brother: I thought I thought I thought it was, grace was different because there's been more emphasis. (he already said that)

Denny: The way I was looking at it was, I was looking at it, I was looking at more from the place of I thought you were getting more of an appreciation for grace but it never dawned on me that we

Stewart: more of an appreciation (That's what I thought)( I never really thought that) Listen, Listen, Gayle's only language is a while ago God woke me up. It was that bad. He woke me up. And rescued me. And he has in fact, (sigh) and uh, that's hope (that you can see) Grace is the foundation. Jesus Christ himself is the foundation but the next thing on is grace. So he is the foundation on Jesus. Grace is the founda, building on Jesus, grace immediately. And this teaching is a house built on sand. Not the church, the hou, the teaching is built on sand. And the teaching has come to nothing. It is based on error and contains error, contains appalling errors. Flat statements contrary to the gospel, flat contrary. I can be bitter toward all my friends as Job of course. But, having his lesson, I haven't been impatient. You know it's been hard for me to say anything to you people for 10 days, knowing all this, not wanting to start things wrongly. And 2 months previously and longer that God was waking me up. I sat here at the last meeting at the end noticing that I was unable to put together grace, election, sanctification, unable to speak of these things. The great teacher unable.

Very hard for me to to uh believe it. Gayle found this verse in scripture, won't tell you where, look it up later. It's about Apollos, who went around with Paul. Apollos was was teaching about Jesus, quite accurately and with a fervent spirit but he was in error. Pricilla , Aquila took him aside and they told him the real story and then those who had received grace heard him gladly. (murmur of assent wow...) Indicating that, indicating that it may have been the very same thing. Those who had received grace heard him gladly. Now do you remember that verse? (yeah) Don't bother now, in fact, FORGET YOUR BIBLES, pay attention. I'm the lesson today, not the Bible. I myself am the lesson. So learn a lesson. His fervent spirit, his fervent spirit was and some accuracy yes and he was well versed in the scriptures. I used to be maybe. And he went with his fervent spirit in the synagogue, in the synagogue he went around insisting on Jesus but apparently uh devoid of grace. Apparently oblivious, indicating maybe that was the problem. Certainly oblivious to something. And then those who had received grace afterwards heard him gladly. And later he was as follows

For 25 years? Was it? By the way. To your shame, well, they didn't really. I walked in here and I actually said..and nobody threw up. I actually said, "Can't you rely on your faith?" That's worse than saved by faith. Now you're even relying on it, it's everything. You rely on your faith. How many of you said, you didn't , you didn't say it, but you thought "that is wrong!" Let's hear it! How many said, that is wrong, Let's Hear It! Up or Down! What did you say Bob?

Bob: I thought it was wrong cuz we just had a lesson on relying on Jesus. but

Stewart: What is, what is the use of all these lessons? These lessons are accomplishing nothing. It's my fervent spirit that's doing everything. You're not listening to the lessons even as far as they do go. You do what I do. I say "don't smoke" but I smoke so what do you do?(smoke). It's nothing but God's grace that which I was oblivious which has brought us thus far, nothing but. It's all the more clear. Even with that error of that magnitude, so that the deepest possible error. I can't believe that no other Christians, I can't believe that no other Christians, an error of that magnitude, could not be spotted. I can't believe it. But there it is. Where is grace? Faith in His promise. Where is grace? Yes, the concept is good. And in fact all the better, 12 ways to practice, that's all the better, that word. Because that's what this is practicing. Now the real use of faith..that

Cut 3

Stewart: That's something else. These are indeed, 12 ways to practice where they, where they properly...speaking of grace and the other matters. But the real use of grace, and the real use of faith rather is in believing and in walking by faith that we are God's chosen and elect and that His grace is given to us. We have to get into this and thereby..grace is first, faith is second. We are saved by grace not by faith. We're saved through faith. Faith is necessary. But faith is the basis. Now of course it's ruined. I wonder. I might as well say it (I'll just go ahead) If you took this book to all the, to the uh bible schools, would they say this is good? I, I, I'm appalled to say I think they would. I think they would buy it. It is written with a fervent spirit and is saying good and right things. The word "subtle"...this is nothing but the work of the devil. Period, nothing but. It is so subtle, so beautiful and perfect. Wish I coulda done that well. Wish I was that good. I'm not. Therefore, who has saved us all these years? (Jesus! by grace, by His grace)

Stewart: And you have this feeling Stewart is saving us. That's what you have, your feeling( voices of accent) somehow. One of the last.....I was handing out these comments about the, this meeting, y'know I hand 'em out, one a day. The last one, I didn't hand out was, "I wish the the uh Christian movie Hollywood cameras could be here for this meeting." to uh make a movie of this meeting. ya think?(yeah)The rest of it was, the rest of the saying was "I've worked very hard for this meeting and I deserve it" (right) and that was going to be the card. Well I have worked very hard. I grew weary with hard doing. Even I grew weary. Sin began showing up in my behavior. Poor Gayle, had to bear the brunt of it. And toward all of you. How was I behaving toward you?

Brother: A cruel father like

Stewart: Let's hear it. A year, 6months, two years? 5 years? Can't figure it out huh?(no) There's a lot of good practical things in here, they helped you a lot if only the basis were there. In fact, If only the false basis weren't there and the right one was. If somebody were trying to avoid grace but still trying to make something look accurate, I wonder how much better they coulda done? Maximum accuracy minus grace. If you're gonna try that, I wonder how you could do much better? If that were the goal, I don't think I could have done that well. There is an amazing space where amazing grace should have been. (yeah, some laughter). There really is. And we used to sing that(yeah)back in 137. I am appalled at the whole thing.

Stewart: of this you have heard before and the word of truth, the gospel which has come to you as indeed in the whole world, it is bearing fruit and growing so among yourselves. From the day you heard and understood the grace of God in truth. Understood?! I never, I never knew it. Literally. I was totally oblivious. Totally oblivious. I know I did it in ignorance. Can you believe that?(mixed voices) find hard to believe it is,(ST voice louder) the amazing thing, God has done amazing things through me for you! many many many, every one of them was only His grace! It wasn't me at all. In fact, it was in spite of me. Now think of that for (unclear). You couldn't do much better on a Grace Hollywood movie. And is there someone more sincere than me? Maybe, maybe not.

Now, what in me could ever, Is it something in me, I, I assume. Why did God allow that? Is it dawning on you that I have been oblivious, grace doesn't exist, doesn't exist. You never heard me speak it did you?( no, no , not until recently)

Cut 3 contines here for 1 minute and 10 seconds more. This is also the beginning of the 1st recording I received of the Grace Meeting. I will now insert the text of the first transcription here and track this new recording with the old and make sure the words are precise


HERE we leave the 1st transcript and recording and continue with GRACE MEETING CUT 6 at 3 minutes 50 sec.

Brother: beginning to

Stewart: what?

Brother: different!

Stewart: different heh.(laughter)

Brother: Seems a lot more fair to me that really is Grace is the basis and I haven't been living according to that.

Stewart: Let's hear it(it's gonna take time) a week at the most (laughter)However(laughter)However, what's needed is starting all over again(yes)God has consigned all of us, that he might have mercy on all and error. We're gonna pray together, Lord willing. Now how are we gonna pray together?(mixed voices, the words by his grace and mercy and salvation are heard) You know it's almost against the uh scripture almost, that all that you do, do in thankfulness for the grace that you've received. You realize that? All that you do, do in thankfulness for the grace that you have received. Not hoping to earn something. Are we ready to pray together?(yes)Tape turned off then on))))

Stewart: Thank you Jesus(thank you Jesus)So how's your shock value people?(mixed voices..."it's getting less")On the other hand some of you were well on your way, 25 years of no grace. No appreciation of grace. you know it's been 10 days now that I've realized that, 10 days and I am shocked as ever, still total shock. I don't see how I could have done that. I keep saying that, I don't know how I could have done it but I did it. How very very hard to believe, but there you have it. Now uh, however why don't we get into instead of uh...What we need to do is redo everything uh..redo our lives as individuals and as a fellowship so that everything is firmly based on grace.(thank you Jesus)Now face it. It hasn't been. That is God's grace has been working for us but eh our lives and and uh fellowship has not been based on grace at all. So, how do we do it, easier said than done.(yes)Any suggestions?

You know something we gotta start? Bible studies such as we had 20 years ago, now what was it like Gayle?

Gayle: Where would all fellowship together in trying to understand God's will and not be assuming Stewart knows everything and just sitting there waiting for him to show us.(murmur of assent "right, I agree").

Stewart: Now how do you like that.. Bob Whipple was there Neil was there.. There was not the assumption that Stewart knows everything.

Bob: right we had We would all get together at 137,and Jesus would show us things and we'd be all get in there, Jesus would be showing brother Stewart things...

Stewart: Harold? Where's Harold? Is he here?

Harold: yeah

Stewart: See Harold was there.(yep) We used to have bible studies and that one little house was all we had(yep)and,

Bob: we were all involved, it wasn't always Brother Stewart we were all given our opinions, what we thought it meant and everything, and y'know Jesus was using all of us together.

Stewart: I was starting from scratch at that time and that's what I'm doing now. How do you like that?(wow, thank you Jesus)what was I saying just humanly, just humanly alone, try that, and you're 53 and you say "well yes, the last 25 years, come to think of it, I was all wrong, okay, I'll start all over again. Just try that. At 53, just in anything human. However that's the state, and it's not human, infinite way way eternal and yet that's what's needed. I and everyone must start over and in fact a bunch a backsliders all the more(yeah)therefore, therefore, and another thing maybe it wouldn't have mattered actually we running out of these books anyway so it's(laughter)

CUT 7

Stewart: Everybody asks, "How's your relationship with Jesus?" You ask that all the time, right, to each other? (yeah) And you immediately follow it with, "Is it based on his grace?" Right? (no, no then pledges to change that) Is relationship with God based on His grace?(hesitating...yess)How do you know..heheh at this point. well alright by faith...however that's what you gotta ask. And that's what you gotta be looking for, actually more,