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Date: Mon, 16 Apr 2001 02:15:30 -0000
Subject: [x-cobu] Re: Stewart Gives You the Business!
The Lord is so very good to all of us. As I read your message,
I was almost covered with "goosebumps", because since my son
Steve's death, I have been trying to discover, through prayer,
my knowledge of psychology (always interpreted only as in accord
with Scripture) "some of the reasons why people go into COBU in
the first place, why they stay, what kind of damage is done to
them (so very, very, very much), and what issues they have to try
to deal with, if they ever dare (as Steve did, going out a window
at 3:00 in the morning, trembling with fear).
And, I walk everyday if I can, and I am in a very lovely reception
center here in DE, and it has flowers, and trees, and paths, and
I like to liken it to Adam walking with God in the garden, in the
cool of the evening.
He often speaks to me at those times of sweet communion, in a wide
variety of ways. **only yesterday, as I walked, I kept getting the
words of a Wesley Hymn I think that all of you will recognize, it
says "He breaks the power of cancelled sin, He sets the prisoners
free". Over, and over. He really wanted to get my attention. One of
my *Major* questions is, "How can I gain some insight into a way
to set free those who were in COBU, who are very much still in
"What is "cancelled sin"? Well, of course, every sin of any believer
has been cancelled ... how can it still have power?
The answer is precisely what you said, that Stewart did what Paul
talks about when he says "Oh foolish Galatians, how could you so
soon return into bondage to the law"??
Stewart used guilt, guilt, guilt, and condemnation, and fear of
reprisal and rebuke, and all of the techniques possible to those
who want to control someone through "brainwashing".
And, he put all of you back into, as you say, a condition of where
you felt incredibly guilty if you even so much as *thought* of
leaving the group, and even after one is out .. there is that
horrible lingering doubt .. "but what if being in COBU **is**
the only way to get to heaven? What if Stewart **was** telling
the truth, and the horror of guilt and fear just keeps going on
So, I offer you all the words ...
"HE BREAKS THE POWER OF CANCELLED SIN:
HE SETS THE PRISONERS FREE".
"If you are free in Christ, you are free indeed".
So, at least one grieving parent, who now sees ever more clearly,
and is given by God, to understand just what was what about the
COBU cult ..totally agrees with you about **guilt**, oh, and also
by the way ...l **shame*** to control you all.
I had the *horror* of attending one of the "BIG MEETINGS", and
I couldn't stomach it after about 2 1/2 hours. So I left at
I had seen the "elder brothers" being demanded to suggest a plan
for the meeting, and then one of them would stand up, oh so
reluctantly, to suggest one he had thought of.
Then, Stewart (I think I won't even capitalize his name from now
on), whispered into the ears of maybe 10 "lambs" who were all
centered around him in a group, and they spread the message
through the whole group .. and then, on cue, the denunciation
began. (Straight out of Mao's book) "Sit down. That's a terrible
plan. How could you as a Christian even suggest that. You are not
in touch with the Lord. You are supposed to be an "elder brother",
and wise enough to lead us, and you seem almost as if you don't
know Christ at all ... and on, and on..
I literally felt totally nauseated, about to regurgitate, and I
made my way out, thankful for the fact that a very loving friend
who is a very deep Christian, out of love and concern, told be
that he didn't think he could bear to think of my going alone.
Oh, so wise he ..
Well, this has run on again .. and my fingers are tired.
GUILT// YES INDEED!! SHAME// YES INDEED TERROR// YES INDEED
FEAR// YRS INDEED PUBLIC DENUNCIATION?// YES INDEED,
and of course, the list could go on, and on, and on. Like his
father, the "other" as I prefer to call him, knew **all of the
negative buttons to push, to accomplish his total destruction
of personalities, and individuals, and young people, just in
the process of forming a separate identity.
I noticed, last of all, that when one got to be a **really**
elder brother, and began to **see** what he was doing, that he
simply ignored them, and wouldn’t even dare to "take them"/you
on. A real coward, actually ... as is the devil, when he is
faced with the full power of Christ. he just slinks off, and
Love to all in Jesus.
Be Well, and whole in the Lord.
I often call Him "The Whole-Maker", because late in life, I
finally became a "new person", not in terms of faith, but in
terms of being someone who was whole ...after the shattering
done to *me* in my parental hoe.