I wrote “What is Fellowship” years ago, just after I returned to Jesus. I was learning anew from God directly in the Spirit about the things concerning Him and His will. I was, you might say, rebuilding my understanding about God. I had been taught Christianity by someone who did not know Christ. It was time to go back and consider the 4 basic tenets of our faith. I recently wrote “What is Church” because I thought the online discussions were trending toward this subject. Before this online ex-members were discussing “witnessing.” I think the next piece might be “True Interpretation” or something that will address another core error of the FF/Cobu experience.

What I said before is that church and fellowship are similar because both are about the “us.” I also said and still believe that going to church is not fellowship but that fellowship can happen at church. Church structure and practices are in scripture. What we do when we get to our meeting place varies from church to church. Why we do what we do varies from heart to heart. Looking at scripture I do see that local churches are set up for those in the body of Christ to do the “us” thing. Here I would like to look less at the structure of church and more at the “fellowship of the Holy Spirit.”

The idea of "others" and "us" originated with God. Genesis 1, "Let us make man in our image." But God being God, His "US" and his "OUR" is too hard to understand. God is the originator of the first, "us." He created the angels and the 4 living creatures and the 24 elders. For man on earth he created the family. Adam was alone horizontally and so Eve was created. Marriage is an "us" but it is also two become one. The idea of being with others and not existing alone I think for humans starts with the family. We are born into a relationship. We have at least a mother and a father. Of course not all families stay together but we are created by God, who created our "us" through two. We are born dependent. A child born and then left alone will die. We need others to begin our life and keep it. The family provides necessities and security to sustain life. A human grows up and survives by others' care and by God. Fellowship is the relationship we have with one another. I believe that fellowship in Christ must first begin with the individual believing in Jesus for the forgiveness of his or her sins. The believer is cleansed and made righteous through the blood of Jesus. Each one of us has our one heart inside, our one spirit and soul. We come to God through Jesus as individuals. We are born physically as individuals. Even twins have their own heart and their own spirit and come out, one at a time. When we stand in the judgment, there will not be "this church" and" that church" standing before the throne. We come to God alone, our relationship is with Him only and we will answer for what we did as individuals in Christ. Now, don't get me wrong church with others is important to our Christian life, but the individual chooses to work in league with, in agreement with others. The idea of taking the action of “getting together” is church. The reasons we “get together” is heart and this is fellowship.

There is a difference though between "the church" which is in the New Testament and "fellowship" with one another which is also in scripture. An individual choose to join a church and a church awards or declines membership to the individual. An individual is born into a family and has no choice in his relationship to his parents. When one gets born spiritually, automatically he or she is in God's family. God is father and we are all brothers and sisters. We don't choose who our spiritual brothers and sisters will be. We do choose to join a church or group. We also choose to fellowship but these are not the same thing. If I want fellowship in the Holy Spirit with another believer I must first choose to "walk in the light as He is in the Light" and the other believer must do the same. And what does the scripture say, we then have "fellowship with one another."(1st John) If I walk in the light and go to church and meet with others and they are choosing to walk in darkness, then I cannot be "in fellowship with them." It is impossible. The church is a structure set up by God through Jesus and written about by Paul. It is not by doctrine or denomination that we have "fellowship." And it is not by attending church or participating in church activities that we have fellowship. It is by the Spirit of God that we find others born of Him. Those born of Him, who choose to walk in the light as He is in the light, do have fellowship with one another. The individual will be judged about the choice to walk with or not walk with God in this life. The choice is either based in the flesh in which case the believer will choose a church or a club to join and think they are in "fellowship" with other believers and that this is what God means by “fellowship.” Or the son or daughter of God will choose in the Spirit and find those who are children of God, in many different locations, and have fellowship in the Spirit with anyone who is also a child of God, walking in the light.

What is fellowship? What is it meant to be? Where does it come from? Why is it important to our spiritual life? What are some wrong ways to look at fellowship? For most Christians it is pretty safe to say that church is their fellowship. It is the place where they practice what they have agreed upon. Baptists practice their faith based on the doctrines about which they agree. Presbyterians, Lutherans, Episcopalians, and the list goes on. Denominations are born out of doctrinal agreement and disagreement. Doctrines. Divisions, and Denominations, in that order, is the natural progression for the creation of the many churches in existence today. This is my opinion. Doctrine is argued over. Divisions come about over the dispute, and, if the contention is severe enough and sustained, then a denomination is created.

How do we have agreement? How do we have fellowship with one another? This scripture starts to focus us on godly fellowship:

1 Co 13:14 - The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.

Here we see a "fellowship of the Holy Spirit." What have we missed all these years? Let me leave this part for now and try to accurately portray the kind of fellowship we were taught, what kind of fellowship in which we participated.

I have been asking ex-members for 12 years, "Why did you join?" and "Why did you leave?" These questions are simple but important to answer. I have said also..."tell me the second and third reasons why you joined” because every ex-member has the same first answer. Some of them are telling the truth, others are programmed to say, "I joined to please Jesus" or some variation of the same idea. There's nothing ever wrong with the first answer except that it's not the whole truth. The reason why I joined was because all my life I had a big family around me and I was tremendously insecure as a child and a young adult. One by one my brothers graduated high school and left home. My security was being taken apart. The FF and COBU became my second family, my security. I found my security in my family and I made COBU my second family so that I could be secure. It's true but that is not what church is for, for any Christian. Stewart confused the function of church and the nature of true fellowship. In the process, people like me, joined his group for one good first reason and one bad second reason.

If you are in a club then you have a membership and you can admit or decline anyone wishing to join. Christians do not "join" a club or "join" a group at the beginning of their spiritual life but are born again, born of the Spirit, born into a spiritual family, with God as their father. The definition of "one another," and "us," and "the children(plural) of God" already existed in scripture before we were saved. It already is in place because God sent Jesus to save us, die for us, redeem us and make our spiritual birth possible and our spiritual family possible. "Fellowship" is immediately possible for the new Christian because they have been at the time “transferred from the kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of his marvelous light.” They don't need to rush immediately to a church to have fellowship. The "family" was God's idea, God's design. The Body of Christ and, in other scriptures, the Bride are of God. Are we a part of the Church that Jesus built upon Peter. Yes! Our "us" our group really consists of members of the body of Christ, individual Christians who ARE in the Spirit of God. This "fellowship" of the Holy Spirit" exists in most countries on this earth. I could go to Russia and find a believer in Jesus and have fellowship of the Holy Spirit with him or her, because "fellowship" is spiritual and it is only possible because of God. Contrast this with the pathetic fear tactics Stewart used to keep us huddled in a physical location. So we see that "church" is not "fellowship." Church is a convenient location where believers can meet and function together.

I will now ask you to consider an even closer look at what fellowship is according to our Lord Jesus. I believe that Jesus spoke of, demonstrated, and invited us into the most precious and unique fellowship experience available between man and God: fellowship with Him. What is so unique, spiritual, and intimate about our fellowship with Jesus is shown in John 17 when He prays that the disciples may become perfectly one even as He, Jesus, and the Father are one. And how does this fellowship happen? Jesus said that He was in the Father and the Father was in Him. This is not walking along side someone in agreement but much more. Being “in someone” in plain terms means you go where they go, you do what they do and you are who they are. When we abide in Jesus, we are abiding in His love, we are abiding in the Father, for God is Love. 1st John also speaks of this fellowship. The disciples had fellowship in the Spirit of God. They were one even as the Father and Jesus were one.

Stop and think now first of Jesus our Lord and His relationship with the Father. Think of all the scriptures in the gospel of John that Jesus spoke concerning Himself and "Him who sent me." Read 1st John and then look at John 17:

1 When Jesus had spoken these words, he lifted up his eyes to heaven and said, "Father, the hour has come; glorify thy Son that the Son may glorify thee, 2 since thou hast given him power over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom thou hast given him. 3 And this is eternal life, that they know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent. 4 I glorified thee on earth, having accomplished the work which thou gavest me to do; 5 and now, Father, glorify thou me in thy own presence with the glory which I had with thee before the world was made.

I want to note a part: to give eternal life to all whom thou hast given him." We were given to Jesus. God gave us to Jesus. "All that the Father gives me, will come to me, and him who comes to me I will not ask out." There are many scriptures about God drawing us, giving us to Jesus. " Eternal life is knowing God and Jesus Christ whom He sent. Knowing God and being known by Him is eternal life. More about “knowing” later.

6 "I have manifested thy name to the men whom thou gavest me out of the world; thine they were, and thou gavest them to me, and they have kept thy word.

Isn't this wonderful truth obvious? To whom do we belong? Who bought us, who owns us?

7 Now they know that everything that thou hast given me is from thee; 8 for I have given them the words which thou gavest me, and they have received them and know in truth that I came from thee; and they have believed that thou didst send me. 9 I am praying for them; I am not praying for the world but for those whom thou hast given me, for they are thine; 10 all mine are thine, and thine are mine, and I am glorified in them.

This is an incredibly powerful and awesome passage. Here I see the essence of how we come to God, how God gives us to Jesus, how we then have fellowship, relationship, oneness with God. We enter into the relationship with God because God chose to reveal his Son to each of us. When God reveals the Son, then we receive the words of Jesus, and "know" that Jesus came from God. Believing that Jesus is the Son of God, that He was sent by the Father and that the Father is in Him and He in the Father.....remember..."knowing" in truth. This is not accepting the report of facts, this is spiritual, this is believing in Jesus, believing the truth about Him, the truth that can only be known IF THE FATHER chooses to reveal Him to you. Look at the end of this part of scripture: I am not praying for the world but for those whom thou hast given me, for they are thine; 10 all mine are thine, and thine are mine, and I am glorified in them.

Do you sense the true significance of this "fellowship," this "us?" Consider a paraphrase. I in you, you in me, I in them and you in me, you in them, because I am in them. Parts of this prayer and 1st John sound like this but consider how there is nothing else in between or around or attached to this intimate fellowship. Jesus IS IN the Father and the Father is IN the Son. "He who has seen me has seen the Father also." Because this is so true, so solidly perfectly true, Jesus even says, as though incredulous of Phillip, "How can you say 'show us the Father.'" It is like Phillip was saying to Jesus, "Hey Jesus, could you show us Jesus, I mean I know you are Jesus, but could you show us the Son of God, Jesus?" To Jesus, Philip was being absurd which makes us all realize how absolutely true the scripture, "He who receives me, receives Him who sent me" is. Jesus was not just a messenger. He was not just a prophet. He was not just a king. He was and is, God. This "knowing" can only happen by God's revelation. Matthew 16:16 Simon Peter replied, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God." 17 And Jesus answered him, "Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jona! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven.”

11 And now I am no more in the world, but they are in the world, and I am coming to thee. Holy Father, keep them in thy name, which thou hast given me, that they may be one, even as we are one.

This is fellowship. It is God who keeps us in His name. Again, think of the crudity of the thing Stewart made and the vulgar way he scared us into staying and held on so tightly to his leadership. Think of this scripture. Jesus is praying to God to keep the disciples in His name, THAT THEY MAY BE ONE EVEN AS WE ARE ONE. I cannot say anything to make this anymore wonderful and true. God keeps us in this fellowship of the Holy Spirit that we may be one...WE, US...we individuals brought together and kept by God so that we can have the oneness that Jesus had and has with the Father. And what is this oneness? One is in the other. You cannot be more intimate than this. Nothing can get between two when they are one.

12 While I was with them, I kept them in thy name, which thou hast given me; I have guarded them, and none of them is lost but the son of perdition, that the scripture might be fulfilled. 13 But now I am coming to thee; and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves. 14 I have given them thy word; and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. 15 I do not pray that thou shouldst take them out of the world, but that thou shouldst keep them from the evil one. 16 They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.

I want to make a point about Stewart not having fellowship with other Christians. It is right that we have no friendship with the world. We are separate from the world, but to separate ourselves from the world is a spiritual action. We have the Spirit of God and are His children. We are spiritually not of this world as Jesus was not of this world. Stewart separated his group from the world, yes. But he also separated his group from the rest of the Body of Christ. One must ask, what spirit does this? Think of Jesus' prayer for the disciples and us and the intimate fellowship we have in the Spirit with other believers. We have identity in the Father and in the Son by the Spirit. Consider Stewart's view of other children of God.

Jesus said in John 13: 20 Truly, truly, I say to you, he who receives any one whom I send receives me; and he who receives me receives him who sent me."

Receiving a believer in Christ, is receiving Christ, and receiving Christ is receiving God. Look at the contrast: 3 John 1:9-11

9 I have written something to the church; but Diot'rephes, who likes to put himself first, does not acknowledge my authority. 10 So if I come, I will bring up what he is doing, prating against me with evil words. And not content with that, he refuses himself to welcome the brethren, and also stops those who want to welcome them and puts them out of the church.

To not welcome the brethren and prevent other believers from “coming together” is a serious offense and a serious indicator that Stewart's behavior toward other Christians was sin. It should have been an obvious sin to us who were in his group and a big indication that he was not in the Father or in the Son by the Holy Spirit. What must be clear in our minds are the true definitions of " The Church" "The Body of Christ" "Fellowship" "Family" "Church Membership" "Factions" and "Cults." For Christians today there are these entities to which we belong.

17 Sanctify them in the truth; thy word is truth. 18 As thou didst send me into the world, so I have sent them into the world. 19 And for their sake I consecrate myself, that they also may be consecrated in truth. 20 "I do not pray for these only, but also for those who believe in me through their word, 21 that they may all be one; even as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.

Jesus means us. Everyone who believed the gospel, the words Jesus gave to the apostles, Jesus is praying for us to also be one as He and the Father are one, for what reason? So "that the world may believe that thou hast sent me." This is the witness to the world. "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." Salvation is coming to know Jesus as the Son of God, as the Lamb of God, as the atonement sacrifice for us. We believe in Him and become one in Him and from this God reveals His Son through us by the Holy Spirit to the world. Love is the fruit of the Spirit. Loving one another is the fruit of the fellowship of the Holy Spirit.

22 The glory which thou hast given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, 23 I in them and thou in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that thou hast sent me and hast loved them even as thou hast loved me.

"I am in them and thou in Me".....The intimate spiritual relationship we have in Him.

24 Father, I desire that they also, whom thou hast given me, may be with me where I am, to behold my glory which thou hast given me in thy love for me before the foundation of the world.

God and Jesus were always one. Their Oneness was before the world was made. When we receive the Holy Spirit, we enter into the Oneness Jesus gained for us by the cross.

25 O righteous Father, the world has not known thee, but I have known thee; and these know that thou hast sent me. 26 I made known to them thy name, and I will make it known, that the love with which thou hast loved me may be in them, and I in them."

Amen!

Please read the first Letter of John and listen and see what the Holy Spirit will say to you about our fellowship with one another. John chapters 13-17 are also a confirming portion of scripture.

Ephesians 4: 1 I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2 with all lowliness and meekness, with patience, forbearing one another in love, 3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call, 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6 one God and Father of us all, who is above all and through all and in all.

Look at these verses and tell me if you can detect any doctrine, division, or denomination in them. "Eager to maintain the UNITY OF THE SPIRIT in the bond of peace. We were called to the ONE God and in the One Spirit. We find our fellowship, in the Holy Spirit. This means our fellowship with one another is in the Spirit. It is spiritual. It is not bound by location or doctrine or denomination.

The Corinthians were not maintaining the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. They were not led by the Spirit when they chose to be devoted to Paul or Apollos or Cephas. These Christians were grouping themselves according to people they chose to listen to and follow. The Corinthians were choosing to do this and Paul corrected them. Paul, Apollos, and Cephas did not and were not encouraging this devotion. Cult leaders exploit this type of sin in believers. Stewart certainly went to the extreme in not only fostering devotion to himself but eliminating any competition, any brother or sister whom members were inclined to pay attention to. He encouraged directly and indirectly devotion to himself, devotion that he acknowledged at the Grace Meeting when he spoke of the members transferring their allegiance from his spirit to God's.

There is the idea of membership. The extreme version of membership, of course, is cultism. I wrote about this before and want you to see it again.

Mark 9:38-41

38 John said to him, “Teacher, we saw someone casting out demons in your name, and we tried to stop him, because he was not following us.” 39 But Jesus said, “Do not stop him, for no one who does a mighty work in my name will be able soon afterward to speak evil of me. 40 For the one who is not against us is for us. 41 For truly, I say to you, whoever gives you a cup of water to drink because you belong to Christ will by no means lose his reward.

This scripture came to me when considering if there were any examples in the bible of "Cult-Like" thinking. Those who lived in the Church of Bible Understanding can remember the many times we heard the idea, "that if you leave, you will backside, or you will go to a church that has a lesser or lower calling than the high calling of the fellowship Stewart Traill designed. Of course, it was never said that bluntly and not in those words. Stewart would cite statistics about those who left. Why? To prove to those still inside that it's God's will that they stay in COBU and that there are consequences for leaving. If you left COBU, you left God. Every current member and ex-member knew what Stewart meant. In the early 80's Stewart acted surprised at the Stone Mountain Manor meeting when brethren brought this idea to his attention. My brother Chris recalled Stewart acting like he never conveyed to us the idea that we couldn't be faithful to Jesus anywhere else but the Church of Bible Understanding.

Try this test, current and former members of COBU. Can you picture any member at any time making an appointment with Stewart and telling him that God was calling him or her, the member, to go elsewhere for fellowship and/or to do God's will in some other church or in the mission field? I can think of only one brother who did this. I also remember what we thought of him when he left. Why did we believe that we who were saved, born again, by way of the witnessing of brothers and sisters of the FF /COBU; Why did we believe that we MUST ALSO only fellowship with Christians within the FF/COBU?

Where did this idea originate? What scriptures support Stewart’s concept of fellowship or church? It was party spirit and it was initiated by and exploited by the one who would derive the most benefit.

Look at the scripture again.

Mark 9: 38-41

38 John said to him, “Teacher, we saw someone casting out demons in your name, and we tried to stop him, because he was not following us.” 39 But Jesus said, “Do not stop him, for no one who does a mighty work in my name will be able soon afterward to speak evil of me. 40 For the one who is not against us is for us. 41 For truly, I say to you, whoever gives you a cup of water to drink because you belong to Christ will by no means lose his reward.

John, son of Zebedee, wanted to stop a man from casting out demons in the name of Jesus. What was his reason? "Because he was not following us." It seems clear that John believed one had to be "with" Jesus (in Jesus' group), to do a spiritual or godly work. In essence, one had to be a part of Jesus' group, fellowship, church, to do God's will. Doesn't this seem reasonable? But our Lord, says "Don't stop him from doing what he was doing. Why? Because if God is casting out demons, using this man, then God is at work in this man's life. Look at this statement," For the one who is not against us is for us." Being with Jesus is a matter of Spirit and not location. This is the strongest argument against membership and cultism. I am reminded of Matthew 24 “when they say “Lo, he is the wilderness, Lo he is in the inner rooms…” Our watchfulness, our knowing our Lord , is spiritual. It is our only preparation for the Lord’s coming. Our readiness is in our hearts: faithful and wise. Jesus will come and wherever we are physically, we will go to be with Him. Only a cult ties a believer down to a location and a leader.

Consider a different point now. Stewart Traill's reported beginnings: going from church to church, arguing and getting thrown out by, we can assume, Christians. Now consider his language in the early days of the FF, labeling such people as CCC’s , Contentious Church Christians. And if these were not "real" Christians, how did Stewart treat "real" Christians? They did exist in the 1970's in America. Yes, there is actual proof that God did indeed save other humans living on the North American continent. Did Stewart seek them out, did he welcome other believers in Allentown? At the very beginning Stewart didn't fellowship with other Christians. More importantly, Stewart was never humbly under another Christian leader's authority in the Body of Christ. He has been alone all his Christian life. His contempt for other Christians was obvious from the beginning of Forever Family. Some of the brethren from those days think Stewart getting booted out of these churches was an indication of his unique stand for the truth. Isn't is also possible that Stewart was standing for "his own" truth and "his own" interpretation and they rejected him as a false teacher or a weirdo. They may have also just ejected him simply because they found him annoying. If Stewart was “walking in the light as He is in the light” he would have had spiritual fellowship with at least 2 maybe 3 other believers. Stewart’s spiritual fellowship with other believers appears non-existent. How did Stewart become pastor of the FF and COBU? To whom did he submit himself for testing? This is a matter for the church. And even if he would have followed church standards and secured the office, still, where is his “fellowship” with others?

There is a passage like the account in Mark. In the last passage Jesus said that if someone is not against Him then he is for Him. Here he is saying, "He who is not with me is against me." and note that this passage and the one before are said at the time when Jesus or someone else was casting out demons.

Matthew 12: 22 Then a blind and dumb demoniac was brought to him, and he healed him, so that the dumb man spoke and saw. 23 And all the people were amazed, and said, "Can this be the Son of David?" 24 But when the Pharisees heard it they said, "It is only by Be-el'zebul, the prince of demons, that this man casts out demons." 25 Knowing their thoughts, he said to them, "Every kingdom divided against itself is laid waste, and no city or house divided against itself will stand; 26 and if Satan casts out Satan, he is divided against himself; how then will his kingdom stand? 27 And if I cast out demons by Be-el'zebul, by whom do your sons cast them out? Therefore they shall be your judges. 28 But if it is by the Spirit of God that I cast out demons, then the kingdom of God has come upon you. 29 Or how can one enter a strong man's house and plunder his goods, unless he first binds the strong man? Then indeed he may plunder his house. 30 He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters. 31 Therefore I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven. 32 And whoever says a word against the Son of man will be forgiven; but whoever speaks against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven, either in this age or in the age to come. 33 "Either make the tree good, and its fruit good; or make the tree bad, and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit. 34 You brood of vipers! how can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. 35 The good man out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil man out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. 36 I tell you, on the day of judgment men will render account for every careless word they utter; 37 for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned."

I will not try and speak on all of this passage but I will point out some things I think are important to our understanding about fellowship. Simply put, Jesus cast out a demon and the Pharisees sinned by directly and wrongly speaking about the Spirit inside Jesus. Jesus teaches them about the spiritual realm and also shows us spiritual warfare between Light and darkness. I would ask you again to see that location, membership, or affiliation is meaningless in this war. When the sons of Sceva tried to cast out a demon and the demon attacked them, they were not with Jesus, not in the light, did not have the Holy Spirit. They could not even get away with using Paul's identity or Paul's relationship with God to cast out the demon. In this spiritual war, we are either in the light or we are in darkness.

When Jesus then speaks of the tree and the treasure, it is plain and indisputable that if you are with Jesus in the light, you will bear the fruits of the Spirit. If you are in Him, you will bring good from your good treasure. He rebukes the Pharisees for their hypocrisy because they wear a mask of light and inside they are full of darkness. "Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks." We need only to listen to what Stewart said to know what treasure he offered and is offering. We need to only see what fruit Stewart bears to know what kind of tree he is. Was Stewart gathering? Was he ever “with” Jesus in the true sense, in the fellowship of the Holy Spirit?

Fellowship is shown and prayed about in John 17. It is explained and proved in 1st John. It is demonstrated in John 13. Jesus makes this fellowship clear to us in John 14-16. Paul addressed those who were not walking by the spirit but were separating themselves into groups, devoting themselves to individual leaders. We also have Stewart creating the worst kind of group, a cult.

Our true fellowship with each other and other Christians begins with our walking in the light as our Father is the Father of Lights and in Him there is no darkness at all. We walk in the light with Him and in Him we have fellowship with those who are also in the light, regardless of what church they belong to or what membership they hold.

So how do we have fellowship with one another? How do we participate in the fellowship of the Holy Spirit? I can repeat the verse again, "If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another." But what does that mean? I know most of you know the answer. For others who only recently, like me, were shown "how" to walk in the light "how" to abide in Him, I will write what little I have learned. There will be plenty of room for me to be shown more by the Spirit of God and by brethren whom the Lord has blessed with more understanding and knowledge to teach me.

For me, to walk in the light as He is in the light means, first: prayer. Of the 4 basics I believe prayer is the most important. In prayer we come to our Father by the righteousness of Jesus in the Spirit. We come into His presence. We come into the light to the Father of Lights. What makes one believer different from another depends on how open and honest and revealing and exposed the child of God is with his or her Heavenly Father. Here we come to the paradoxical language about our Father God. Our Father is omniscient and yet when Jesus comes, He will say to some, "I never knew you." What does this mean? Look at this scripture in John 17 again:

3 And this is eternal life, that they know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent.

This is eternal Life! If we consider all the scripture where Jesus speaks of eternal life and giving us eternal life and entering into life, it comes back to this. We know Him and Him whom He sent. "Knowing" Him does not mean knowing about Him but knowing Him in a relationship. When does this relationship begin? When He draws us and gives us to the Son. He chooses to reveal His son to the ones He gives to Him. We then are cleansed and we are born of the Spirit. We begin to know our Lord. Do we know all there is to know about Him when we are new Christians? No. Knowledge and knowing Him are two distinct things. Why did Jesus say, "Let the children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of Heaven," and "unless you turn and become like children you will never enter the Kingdom of God” ? Children are woefully deficient in knowledge, but they know Him. If a person goes to the cross of Christ and receives Him and dies two minutes later, he will enter eternal life. Our knowing Him is one aspect of walking in the light. Knowing Him, knowing the Way, the Truth and the Life, loving Him, is walking with Him.

The other part of walking in the light is God knowing us. Now as I said, God knows everything about everyone. It would be unjust for Him to judge someone and say "Depart from me" if He was not aware of all the evidence. He would be considered unfair or unjust. But what does "I never knew you" mean? Look at this scripture:

1 Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that "all of us possess knowledge." "Knowledge" puffs up, but love builds up. 2 If any one imagines that he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. 3 But if one loves God, one is known by him.

"But if anyone loves God, one is known by Him." Being known by Him does not appear to be God knowing the facts about us because He already knows everything. Here is what I believe "walking in the light" and Him "knowing" us has to do with fellowship in the Spirit. When we are in prayer, we allow ourselves, our whole selves to be searched by the Spirit. We hide nothing from our Lord. Do we have the ability to hide something from him, withhold something from Him? Yes! We still have the free will to hide our hearts, our selves, our person, or some part of our life. Yes, He knows all about us, but He will confine His Knowing Us to what we give to Him, release to Him, leave with Him, what we invite Him to share. Our own will, our free will, He will not violate and so what we hold back from His Spirit, He will not pry out of our grasp. Walking in the Light is coming before the Lord and willingly giving everything we are to Him and allowing Him to know us. When we do this, we are in the light with Him with nothing tucked away in darkness. The scripture, "Search me oh God and see if there be any wicked way in me," is not for God to discover or uncover what He doesn't know about us but to reveal us to ourselves. We also are demonstrating to Him our willingness and invitation for Him to bring to the surface what we need to repent from, what we need to turn over to Him. We invite Him to shine the light of the Spirit into the depths of our being and expose us. "For whatever becomes visible is light."

I know that this whole subject is hard for ex-members as it triggers terrible memories of public exposure in the name of “coming to the light.” I want to remind you that you are going to God in prayer. It’s you and Him. Believe me, I still find this difficult even when I know that I am alone with God. What He thinks of me, what He might say to me, all tainted to some extent by what I was taught about Him by someone who did not know Him.

When the Spirit searches us, He is not searching our flesh or reminding us of our temptations. He is searching us because we have invited the Lord to know us and The Spirit will show us how we have transgressed the relationship by sinning against God. Some sins we are aware of and some we are not. The Spirit is willing and able to bring to our minds and hearts how we have sinned against the Lord. He waits for us to invite Him with a pure and open heart. Remember that when the Spirit searches us, He will not draw any attention to our corrupt flesh or the devil's temptations. "Thou desirest truth in the inward being." God is concerned with the "me" inside that has the power now to choose light over darkness. If I have chosen sin, chosen darkness, then 1st John 2: 1 My little children, I am writing this to you so that you may not sin; but if any one does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous; 2 and he is the expiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world.

Why would we not come to the light? Why do we not run to the Father in prayer and invite the Spirit of God to search us and purge us of spiritual darkness?

John 3:19 And this is the judgment, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. 20 For every one who does evil hates the light, and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. 21 But he who does what is true comes to the light, that it may be clearly seen that his deeds have been wrought in God.

There will be for some, always an echo of what we were taught about the bible when looking at scripture. I crucial practice for all ex-members is to allow the Spirit into this part of your life. Allow the Spirit to teach you the truth about coming to the light and try not to think of the painful past but be in the present with Him.

Our new nature delights in God and wants to be in His presence. Our old nature cries Rev 6:16 -... to the mountains and rocks, "Fall on us and hide us from the face of him who is seated on the throne, and from the wrath of the Lamb.” Think of this verse and then read: Mt 18:10 -"See that you do not despise one of these little ones; for I tell you that in heaven their angels always behold the face of my Father who is in heaven." Read," unless you turn and become like children...." The child naturally goes toward Jesus; the corrupt seek to be hidden.

When we come from our time in prayer, filled with the Spirit, walking by the Spirit, walking in the light, walking in love, we may encounter in our day someone else who has surrendered all to our Father, in the Spirit. With this person, we have fellowship. Our relationship is spiritual. Language, denomination, culture, or any other earthly barrier or division cannot prevent this fellowship of the Holy Spirit.

Prayer, I think, is the starting of walking in the light. It may be the only part of the life of the believer when we come into His presence and ask the Spirit to search us. It is there we have a choice to repent and expose the darkness in us and invite The Lord to know us. Look at this again in 1st John:

John 2: 1 My little children, I am writing this to you so that you may not sin; but if any one does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous; 2 and he is the expiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world.

3 And by this we may be sure that we know him, if we keep his commandments. 4 He who says "I know him" but disobeys his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him; 5 but whoever keeps his word, in him truly love for God is perfected. By this we may be sure that we are in him: 6 he who says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked.

We are sure we know Him if we keep His commandments (love one another) We are sure we are in Him, by walking in the same way in which He walked. We are the lights of the world. He was/is the Light of the World. We walk by the Spirit. We walk in the Light. God is Love. Love one another. God is Light. Abide in Him. Abide in His love. I in you and thou in me. I in them. Can you see the intimacy of the fellowship of the Holy Spirit?

7 Beloved, I am writing you no new commandment, but an old commandment which you had from the beginning; the old commandment is the word which you have heard. 8 Yet I am writing you a new commandment, which is true in him and in you, because the darkness is passing away and the true light is already shining. 9 He who says he is in the light and hates his brother is in the darkness still. 10 He who loves his brother abides in the light, and in it there is no cause for stumbling. 11 But he who hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.

Notice the interchangeable language of Light and Love and abiding. Here we see that loving one another is abiding in the light. There is no in-between. We are with Jesus in the light, or in darkness against Him.

18 Children, it is the last hour; and as you have heard that antichrist is coming, so now many antichrists have come; therefore we know that it is the last hour. 19 They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would have continued with us; but they went out, that it might be plain that they all are not of us.

This scripture was misused by Stewart and is probably a favorite of all cult leaders. Please remember all that I wrote about the church, membership, and cults. False christs, false prophets, and antichrists will come and will command your allegiance, your membership, and will steal the truth of the fellowship of the Holy Spirit and apply it to their created group. They will condemn those who leave their group as though the person is leaving God, leaving the light. I don’t need to remind ex-members what things Stewart said to equate his group to that of the fellowship of the Holy Spirit. I do see a connection between legalism and location vs. grace and the fellowship of the Spirit.

The proofs of walking in the light are here. I believe the fruits of the Spirit and the description of Love in 1 Corinthians 13 are also our way of knowing that we are in Him, in the light, in fellowship with one another.

Having read all this you can now look at church in its useful and proper context and fellowship as something much more than meeting on Sundays. Church is necessary for us while we are here on this earth. It is the way we do the “us” part of our Christian life. But our oneness with God, Jesus, The Holy Spirit, enables “us” to be one, which is the true “us.”