Feeling

By: Mike Hansen

What the fuck is wrong with me

Why does everything i do get fucked up

What the hell was I thinking

Why does this happen to me

I did nothing to deserve this

Yet a curse falls on my head

Nothing ever goes the right way

Truly I'd rather be dead

Emotions cloud my very senses

And stupidly i dont see how

Those I love are falling from me

And theres nothing i can do now

Why does it matter

No one lives forever

I'm no exception

Just hope for heaven

People that I know and love

Will fall to ashes and to dust

I did nothing to deserve this

So once again, then what the fuck?

Everytime somethings go well

I fuck them up they burn in Hell

Oh my God, I am disgraced

Even scared to show my face

No one should love me

No one should care

No one should acknowledge

That I'm even there

For I am just a stupid fucking

Shit faced lying dumb dirt sucking

Useless chunk of human flesh and nothing

That I do goes right, even when I try my best

My feelings get the best of me

Only now realize stupidity

So what the fuck is going on?

My life is draining, not for long

And as I fade I hope to God

I'm not forgotten, and they jsut let me die

Cold and alone, sorry for all that I've done

as feeling sits inside of me

dying now i feel empty

largely due to lack of faith

no one loves me emotions raped

my best is never good enough

but its all that i can do

jsut to die would not be tough

pull the trigger and im through

lying in a pool of blood

thrown under six feet of mud

my soul is crying for repose

as my body starts to decompose

mortal remains are rotted away

but to everyone else just another day

who was i what was i

i was just a man

never did anything right

somehow it always made me feel like

it was wrong and i was to blame

a downward spiral erupts in flame

my soul inside an inferno of death

all because i tried my best

what the fuck it shouldnt be

why wont anyone love me

am i just not what i should have become

even though my life is done

for everbody that i've caused pain

do not worry there is much to gain

now that im gone you can live in bliss

my memories now are worthless

no longer enough just to desire

my essence trapped by satans fire

losing contace with your world, please forget me i was nothing and meant nothing by it.

burning angels fall to earth

become man and woman and give birth

a wretch from nothing destined for the same

and i know thats all i am

i can do nothing

so thats what is done

dont care how long i have to run

nothing is fun

when you are the one

that humanity shuns

with the point of a gun

people will lie and spectres will wail

demons will haunt me for sure i will fail

collect my blood as i hit the floor

a shutting passage opens a door

my life escapes and death is feigned

however more i need to change

my life itself not good enough

no one cares for lives ive touched

no one loves me thats ok

maybe i'll be loved on day

i'm expected just to be a man

and to do everything that i can

but ive tried

ive failed

slit my wrists

my face grows pale

dont have the guts to anymore

because ive spilled them on the floor

my empty shell

shot into hell

but all is well

now that ive fell

wont worry about what people think

my beating heart falls in the sink

the razor falls and hits the knife

that i have used to end my life

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