30 September 2000 ~ The lawyer and the whore; two tales of Java Joe's...

Thursday night, I was pleasantly surprised to see two people I'd not seen in 6 years. (And three days.) It was a couple, about my parents' age, give or take, who had been in the ill-fated show "Wizard of Oz" with me. I vaguely recognized them, and they recognized me immediately, even though I've changed immensely since then.

We talked for a little while: your typical "so whatever happened to so-and-so?" discussion... Of course, I know where everybody's gone ("...gone to flowers, every one..."), so it was a nice talk... Until...

"So, Helena, how did you get your job here?"

I raised my eyebrows ever-so-slightly. "Um... I applied, and they needed a worker, and so they called me..."

"We were here a couple of years ago and David was working here..." (Of course, the couple also knew David from "Wizard of Oz." It was where we'd all met to begin with...)

"Yeah, he worked here for a long time," I replied softly, wondering where they were heading with their comment.

"I remember you always used to flip the pages in the music for him when he'd play the piano... He didn't help you get this job? See him lately at all?" There was some implication behind those words, but I couldn't quite read far enough between the lines...

"I saw him a few months back -- I went to visit him for a couple of days..."

"So is he good?"

Okay, this was definitely a veiled comment about something... They weren't asking, "is David DOING okay?" or "how is David's LIFE?" They were asking if David was "good"... Hm...

"Yes, he's good," I replied hesitantly.

"It's okay -- you can tell it to us straight; we're married people here... So he helped you get this job?"

Well, GAH-DAMN!!!

No, I didn't get the job at Java's because I'm a halfway decent person, a halfway decent worker, or a halfway decent barrista... I got the job because I'd fucked David??? Is THAT what they were saying???

First of all, these people are my parents' age with kids -- maybe 14 or 15 by now. Second, they're ultra-religious and you'd NEVER expect stuff like this out of their minds or mouths. Third, for heaven's sake, WHY and HOW did they remember my short-lived (but intensely happy) career as the page-turner for the piano player SIX YEARS EARLIER? Fourth, who the hell would associate my puppy-love for David six years ago, with my current job? It sort of creeped me out, as though these people could see six years' worth of Helena-history: from piano-player's-assistant, to piano-player's-close-confidant, to piano-player's-secret-girlfriend, to piano-player's-close-confidant, to employee at Java Joe's? Could they see all that, or was I just being neurotic? How could they even know I'd spoken to David after he unexpectedly quit the show and disappeared for awhile?

Fifth, I HIGHLY resent the implication that I got my job by having sex with someone, especially David. Sex, to me, means more than that. DAVID, to me, means MUCH more than that. And my job, however good or bad my performance, means more than that. I felt very much as if this couple, who hadn't seen me in six years, was calling me a whore.

But I smiled and shook my head and made some excuse to end the conversation; something about having to wipe tables or something.

(I am NOT a whore... I do NOT sleep with people for my own personal benefit, and I never have... I do not use people, particularly not my closest friends...)

Friday night at work, I saw my favorite lawyer, which wasn't a surprise at all, because he's there with his family nearly every night. He told me he'd come looking for me a week earlier because he'd gotten an extra ticket to the Pink-Floyd laser-light show, and thought I'd like to see it. "There was a time when music was good," he told me, "We had our Barry Manilows and all, but..." I smiled broadly and agreed. I like him a lot; he's one of the most generous professional people I know. Besides, he told me once about living in New Mexico in the early 70's (I think???) and I took it as a definite sign of cameraderie. I felt good again about my job and my customers and my life in general...

(I'm not a whore...)

(Really...)

~Helena*