I hate email-surveys... I hate feeling obligated to send a great number of people intimate information about myself. Oh, questions like, "what's your favorite salad dressing?" don't bother me, but even stuff like "who is the hottest person in the world?" can get a little too personal... I mean, what if the hottest person in the world happens to NOT be my boyfriend? And what if the hottest person in the world doesn't KNOW I think they're the hottest person in the world, and I'm suddenly broadcasting the information to my circle of frinds?
I always feel awkward about those things unless I can send them one at a time, changing some of the answers so as not to hurt anybody... It's a bit of a cop-out, but whatever.
I found a short one in Aaron's journal today, and decided it's just personal enough to raise some eyebrows, but not personal enough to really hurt anybody or really destroy anybody's illusions of me... So, here you go: Helena's Numbers...
Age I am - 21
People I have slept with - *gulp* Eight.
Age when I lost my virginity - 16
Times I have been in love - Two and a half... The half came in when I realized I wasn't really in love with much more than an idea... The other two are quite fabulously real.
Times I have had my heart broken - Two and a half, see above...
Hearts I have broken - I'm not sure, though I'd venture to say maybe two. I know I've hurt a few people pretty badly. But I think it would be presumptuous to believe I've actually done severe damage.
Months I have been single - N/A
Continents I have visited - one, and three countries (not bad for a little Johnson City girl, enh?)
Age when I first flew all alone - Eighteen
Numbers of boys I have kissed in my life - Thirty-four
Number of girls I have kissed. - Seven
Types of drugs taken illegally - Just one; does weed even count?
Drugs I am addicted to right now - one
Number of piercing - two -- just my ears
Number of tattoos - not yet
Number of times my name has appeared on film credits - I doubt it has, but one never knows... I do know a film-student or two...
Number of times someone has made me scared of what they could do to me physically - Three times. I altered this because it said "how many times has a BOYFRIEND made you scared..." but there was a time when I was pretty damn scared of my dad hitting me.
Number of things in my past that I regret, and still haunt my nightmares - Surprisingly few... I regret coming on too strong with people who were not ready for it and didn't know what to do later. I regret saying a number of things to Peter that I didn't really mean -- bear in mind I meant the vast majority of them. I regret getting David in trouble with the cops -- but that doesn't haunt me so much anymore, as I found a small way to let go of that guilt. And I regret lying to Mike and Norman. But I really think that's it.
~H.T.*