The Divorce and Remarriage Page
Questions & Answers

(Question 3)









Question Three:I was saved after I was divorced, should I go back to my spouse if he / she is available?


Answer: Just as a marriage covenant has ended once an unbeliever leaves. So too the old marriage covenant that you with your unbelieving (if that be the case) spouse has - for all practical purposes - ended in the eyes of God - once you were saved. God’s new covenant with you ends any old marriage covenants you had because it supersedes them. You belong to Him now. You obey and, are in fact married to Him now (actually engaged ).


In other words... if God has set a saved person free from a marriage covenant where an unbeliever leaves, He has in fact set all saved people free from any unsaved marriage covenant they made before they were saved, once they made a choice to make Him the Lord of their life.


Another thing you might want to consider. The bible says that each person should remain in the condition in which that they were called (i.e. saved). Paul makes this statement 3x in the book of 1st Corinthians (1 Cor 7:17,20,24) so something (i.e. God) is obviously trying to make a point. Paul also goes on to say “Are you released from a wife (i.e. spouse)? Do not seek a wife (i.e. spouse)” (1 Corinthians 7:27) IOW’s if you were a “slave” and have found your freedom, remain in such a state (He does actually says this).



You also might want to see Question 12 on this matter as well as what the bible says about the remarriage of the divorced and widowed . Paul - while allowing for remarriage is not overly happy about it. There might be some relevant issues in these sections for you.




But what if your ex-spouse was a Christian and now that you are saved (and assuming both available) should you go back to him?


Well that is up to Him / Her for the covenant you had with them was in fact ended when you - as an unbeliever left. You can make a case that you should make an attempt to go back based on what Paul did to Onesimus, but again it up to your former spouse if he / she would want to do that (just like Philemon - Onesimus’ “owner”), for again you left the marriage covenant and in God’s eyes it ended when you did that (Actually I think Paul was counting on Philemon saying “NO” for Onesimus had become useful to Paul and as a fellow worker for the Gospel was hoping Philemon would send him back (vs. 13 Onesimus “whom I wish to keep with me).


Also you can also make a rather strong case that since your old marriage covenant ended once you left then you are in fact free to re-marry anyone you wish - as long as it’s in the Lord. Pray about these things. It may be that God wants you to make an attempt to go back (Like Onesimus. Paul did see an advantage in doing this in regard to believer / believer relationships). But if you did - and your ex-spouse accepts - the two of you would have to get remarried for you old covenant had ended when you left (again see Question 12).


If I had to put “weight” on what the correct thing to do is, I would say... 1) Stay where you are (i.e. single). 2) Seek reconciliation with your available ex-Christain spouse 3) Seek a new Christian spouse. But again you can make a rather strong case case that 2 should be 3 and 3 should be 2, but I would put it in the above order.


But remember this, since we did indeed DIE in Christ when we were saved, all our previous (unsaved) marriage covenants can be legitimately nullified (see Romans 7:3,4). So there is absolutely no obligation at all to go back to any old unsaved marriage covenant since the person (you) who indeed made that covenant “died in Christ” (Gal 2:20) A VERY VERY BIG POINT!!!








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