The Divorce and Remarriage Page
Questions & Answers

(Question 12)








Question Twelve: I got saved, married an unbeliever and have since found out that what I did was wrong. I want to repent. If a person who married an unqualified Christian spouse is in a state of sin (adultery), and they should in fact leave, shouldn’t I then leave my unqualified spouse?


Answer:




Unbelievers and Covenants




A Slavewoman of Old
(Who Became a Wife)




“... if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases...” 1 Corinthians 7:15

“You shall not hand over to his master a slave who has escaped from his master to you.” Deuteronomy 32:15
The 6 common patterns in the making of a covenant in the Ancient World



1) Mentioning the names of the parties
2) Mentioning the history of the relationship of those entering the covenant
3) A basic declaration about the future relationship of the partners
4) Details of the new relationship
5) An invocation of the respective gods worshipped (on both sides) to act as witnesses
6) A pronouncement of curse and blessing



Please note all covenants are different. A marriage covenant in some societies (American, Old Testament Judaism as well as others) usually consists of 2 parts and the first part (the engagement covenant) can consist of some or all of the above steps.

There is no real order to many of the above 6 steps either (including the oath), and some steps can just be assumed too.

The engagement covenant (and it is a covenant), if it is made IS a “down-payment” on what IS to come. However in some societies - including American - some people just get married without any engagement (waiting) period (That is: they elope, marry secretly or just go to the justice of the peace, etc.). Doing so may not be the wisest thing to do, but it is an allowable and a valid covenant.

Actually you can make a VERY STRONG case for a couple who exchanged vows before God (with no authority person present) and make a case for that being a valid marriage covenant too (which is usually what an engagement covenant is, but I’m thinking more along the line of a missionary in the field who finds love or something and wants to make a FULL covenant before God).

However some people counter all this by bringing up the old covenant right of a father to annul any covenant made by his daughter (but not a son) once he finds out about it. He has a day (and only a day) to annul it (Numbers 30:3-5) and the daughter who’s covenant he annuls must be living in under his roof (that is: she is not out on her own). Under this concept if the father doesn’t do anything about it, the woman’s covenant stands as is. But this is another question (maybe # 60 something), but could become relevant if a father thinks his - living at home - daughters choice of a spouse in unacceptable.

A courting man really should ask the father’s permission first before he proposes to his daughter. If the above is true eloping, marrying secretly or just going to the justice of the peace may NOT be a good idea.







The below is still under “re-write”


Paul says that conditions cannot be added to a covenant nor can a covenant it be altered once a covenant has been made.


“Brethren, I speak in terms of human relations ... (in) a man’s covenant... when it has been ratified (i.e. oath or consummated), no one sets it aside or adds conditions to it.” (Galatians 3:15)


However in God’s way of working things a covenant, if it’s been violated (both in false foundation and /or after ratification), things can be added to it as long as it does not nullify the basic promise of the covenant.


“Why the Law ? (i.e. another covenant aside from the Abrahamic covenant). It was added (to Abraham’s Covenant) because of transgressions...” (Galatians 3:19)



“What I am saying is this: the Law (i.e. another covenant), which came four hundred and thirty years later (i.e. after Abraham’s covenant), does NOT invalidate a covenant previously ratified by God, so as to nullify the promise (of the first covenant - i.e. Abraham’s). (Galatians 3:17)


In regard to violations committed BEFORE ratification... (i.e. if the foundation of a covenant is false (e.g.. see step 2 above) and the innocent party who swore an oath (i.e. ratified, or step 5 above) finds out, the innocent party may not change the oath part of the covenant (it’s been ratified), but they may add something to the covenant IF they choose to (for their own protection). The Bible mentions this particular “false foundation “ right of “covenant adding” in the book of Joshua. The right - in that particular case (i.e. Joshua’s) - is called adding a “Slave Clause” (See Below) and this particular right is picked up by Paul too in his 1st letter to the Corinthians (which will be talked about in depth later)





Joshua making a covenant with someone who lied to him


”And made peace with them and made a covenant with them, to let them live; and the leaders of the congregation swore an oath to them (i.e. “a promise” that that they should live). And it came about at the end of three days after they had made a covenant with them, that they heard that they were neighbors and that they were living within their land [i.e. they lied about the foundation of the covenant (step 2)]... Then Joshua called them and spoke to them saying, Why have you deceived us, saying “We are very far from you”, when you are living within our land? (i.e. lied about foundation) Now therefore you are cursed, and shall never cease to be slaves... (i.e. a valid condition was added unto the covenant)” (Joshua 9:15-23)



[It should be pointed out again here that the conditions added on to a covenant after radification - due to false foundation - (e.g.. The “slave clause” right mentioned above), does not nullify the basic promise of the covenant. Even the discipline (that may be) added on to a covenant for sins committed after it has been ratified (e.g.. let’s say if a spouse has been unfaithful) does not nullify the previous promise. A promise is a promise, and a covenant will basically always be a covenant (Galatians 3:15-19)]



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A Big Point Coming...



The things about slaves (i.e. read “slave clause” here) is that slave relationships within Israel was not always a permanent one. Slaves could be set free under certain conditions (e.g. extreme physical abuse Exodus 21:26,27; even neglect or desertion Exodus 21:10,11).


(And I’m sure a slave - being a slave - could just be set free for no reason at all, if the master wanted to voluntarily grant his freedom... if you get my drift. That is “hey unsaved husband / wife you can leave if you want”).


Click Here

(for the Biblical conditions for the release of Slaves)


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Paul picks up on this whole “slave release” thought in 1 Cor 7 about a believer not being bound to an unbeliever. He even talks about slave relationships within the chapter too.


Click Here

(to see all the main Words and Verses of 1 Corinthians 7 in the Greek)
Including Paul’s view on the “Slave Clause”


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The en-slaved people in Joshua case (read Paul’s ‘if the unbeliever leaves’ case here too) could - if they chose - stay within the boarders of Israel (read ‘household’ in Paul’s case) thus - if followed by the slave or unbeliever (i.e. “if” being the conditional nature of the covenant) - the oath part of the covenant - regarding the believer - would in fact remain in effect (i.e. ‘bound if they stay’)

however - in regard to both theses cases, because the covenants are made on false grounds (see step 2 above in Joshua’s case, or in Paul’s case step 3, i.e. believers and unbelievers have no future together ) conditions could be added to the covenants (read the “permanent covenant” has become a “conditional covenant” here) but because of the oath made by the righteous person swearing it, the covenant could NOT be annulled by the righteous person, but it could be annulled by the person (i.e. unrighteous lying slaves in Joshua’s case, or unrighteous unbeliever in Paul’s case) with whom the covenant was made. In both cases a “slave” person.

In other words all “foundationally challenged covenants” have become in effect defacto “conditional slave clause covenants”





Rahab hides the 2 spies


( As an example of a conditional covenant: See the Rahab oath sworn to her by the spies. (Rahab was a least on the surface a “slave type of person” for she was in the land, and part of a people where God’s people were told NOT to make covenants with any of them. She was afterward placed “outside the camp” Joshua 6:23). The covenant that the spies made with “this person” was a conditional type of thing, or a ‘slave clause” covenant (Joshua 2:17-21) If she and her family were to go out of the doors of the house (i.e. “leave” like the unbeliever in 1 Cor 7) and go into the street they would die. (see Joshua 6:22) The Conditional Covenant that they made was not valid anymore. Again also see where a permanent thing like a slave (Leviticus 25:46) can become temporary due to the nature of the relationship (Exodus 21:10,11 & 26, 27).




And it should be pointed out that Rahab soon moved from a “slave position” outside the camp (Joshua 6:23), to a “non-slave status” within the camp (Joshua 6:25). Her unrighteousness - (harlotries) - was forgiven her and she was accepted [and even turns out to be a great great great etc. grandmother of Jesus (Matthew 1:5)].

I tell you the truth Jesus would rather have 1000 people like her (Matthew 21:31,32; Luke 7:37-50) who have seen the error of their ways and repented than a bunch of bigoted Pharisees who are not humble, proud and forget where they themselves have come from.



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To sum up what we have said so far....

if a slave left his (sworn conditional added on covenant) (i.e. left the house - Rahab or unbeliever in 1 Cor. / boarders of Israel - as in Joshua) - the master (i.e. spouse) was no longer bound by the oath (again see Rahab) because it was annulled (i.e. the covenant was annulled) by the slave who left.

The covenant with Rahab is a good example on how someone can be released from an oath.


To put it another way, in the case with Joshua - (because the foundation was illegal - therefore the “slave clause “ was added unto it) The slaves in Joshua time (Gibeonites) were allowed to live (because of the oath) BUT only if they remained (within the border of Israel ) and remained as slaves. If they left either part of the covenant (left the border of Israel) the covenant could be LEGALLY annulled, for they went out (i.e. left) on their own and the master is free from any obligation to them. (read 1 Cor 7)

Also if they rose up and violated the Slave Part of the covenant that stated they were not to kill anyone (2 Samuel 21:4) the covenant could also be annulled Click Here. It was a conditional type of thing.







Therefore a person can LEGALLY be released from a covenant (i.e. released from his oath) for how can they keep it (keep slaves alive) when they left the covenant (went outside the house - again see Rahab). They violated the stipulation (in Rahabs case added on with the covenant, in Joshuas case LEGALLY added on after the covenant). Please note in Joshua’s case the covenant did not change after the deception (i.e. false foundation) was found out. (They were allowed to live), but a stipulation was added to it. A qualifier if you will.

It’s like saying “as long as you live in my house I am bound to this agreement”. (see also what the book of Hebrews says about those who apostasize (i.e. abandon, desert, defect, TOTALLY RENOUNCE) . Also - it should be noted - that there would be no room for repentance (i.e. can’t come back) for full willful apostasy. God is released from His obligation to the covenant too. Some people have more grace than God does in certain types of situations and it’s not good for anybody including them.




[See 1 John 2:19 in reference to those who really leave (not talking about backsliding believers here) - i.e. but the true unbeliever in the covenant. And please read the willful sin section of this site, as well as the sin against the Holy Spirit (Click Here) and scroll down].





If however a person had a slave (i.e. unbeliever in 1 Cor) who choose to stay (in house/ border) the believer was bound (according to Paul to) to keep his part of the covenant. For thus he swore, but if the slave didn’t follow the conditions left by the master (i.e. servitude with borders) and left (the borders / household) the master was LEGALLY free of his oath and COULD violate the Covenant made (again see Rehab)


The thing in Joshua’s case with the Gibeonites (unbelievers) is that it had to do with the foundation of the covenant being illegal. It was founded on false pretenses Therefore (and I mean “therefore” according to God here) It could be annulled, (BUT ONLY by the person who swore falsely... or lied). The oath was still (conditionally) binding on the believer.


(Do you see why it is impossible for believers who are married to each other to divorce and marry other people? Believers are bound to the oaths that they made to each other. It’s the most double-sided truest form of unbreakable covenant around)



It makes sense when one considers all the parts that make a covenant valid. (It should be pointed out here that a slave could choose to remain in that position if he chooses - love salve with ear pierced after a certain amount of time). It’s almost like the master would enter into a new higher covenant with the slave.

Now in regards to how this relates to a believer falsely marrying a person they thought was a believer and was actually an unbeliever. (remember we are dealing with perfectly legal things here). He (the believer) has to stay in the relationship. His honor / word is at stake (step 5). even though the foundation was false (step 2 +)




but if the unbeliever leaves (again this IS where Paul is coming from) the believer is not bound by the covenant (like Rahab), for the unbeliever (like Rahab would of been if she left the house because she didn’t believe Israel would come).. for the unbeliever left (like a slave .. read Gibeonites) and the believer is free form the relationship and could - if they choose - remarry. By their fruits you will know them. And again, if they were really of us they would not have left (1 John 2:19), they were never really part of us to begin with Again, I am not talking about the backslidden believer here).





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For

Unbelievers
and
Covenants
(Part 2)


Click Here









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