Away Messages... Page Four


If you think life is bad now, how would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. You get eaten once. It takes for minutes to get hard, only to minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all, the only chick that ever sat on your face was your mom! So cheer up, your life isnt that bad! .

HeLLo, you HaVe ReaCHeD THe auToMaTeD
aNSWeRiNG SeRViCe FoR SN ,
youR MeSSaGe WiLL Be aNSWeReD To iN THe
oRDeR iN WHiCH iT WaS ReCieVeD, youR
MeSSaGe iS NuMBeR 8,243, PLeaSe HoLD,
youR MeSSaGe iS iMPoRTaNT To Me.

i aM aWay, i WoN'T DeLay,
GeTTiNG BaCK To you,
youR eyeS oF BLue,
DRaW Me CLoSe,
WiTH SuDDeN MySTeRy,
i WouLDN'T MiSS TaLKiNG To you,
FoR aNyTHiNG iN ouR HiSToRy!

Hey! i aM aWay RiGHT NoW!
JuST LeaVe Me a MeSSaGe aFTeR THe
BeeP...............................
PeeP (NoPe, NoT RiGHT)......
KeeP (NoPe, NoT RiGHT aGaiN)...
LeaP (NoPe).....
SLeeP (NoT RiGHT)....
TeeP (iS THaT eVeN a WoRD?)....
WeeP (NoT yeT)....
CReeP (Hey, THaT'S u!)....
NeaP (NeaP TiDe?)....
MeeP (NoPe).....
SWeeP(NaW)..............
DeeP (CLoSe)....
SeeP (CLoSeR)....
i GueSS My MaCHiNe iSN'T WoRKiN.....
i JuST WaSTeD a WHoLe LoT oF youR TiMe...HaHa!

i'M RuNNiNG ouTSiDe uNDeR My
BLaNKeT PReTeNDiNG To Be aN uNDeRCoVeR aGeNT!!

WeLCoMe To STaLKeRS iNC.
To FiND a SPeCiaL SoMeoNe TyPe
THe CoDe 458613 aND THeN TyPe THe
FuLL NaMe aND CLiCK aLT CTRL STaLK
aND u WiLL FiND WHo you R LooKiNG FoR-
THiS iS NoT a HoaX.

Im not here Im on the potty, but dont leave if youre a hottie .

Sometimes we like it up and down and sometimes we like it back and forth and it only takes about two minutes to do, but it feels great so maybe you should go brush your teeth too. .

Hello. You have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are, where you are from, and what you want so there is no need to leave a message.

If you think I'm sexy and you want my body, leave a message. Otherwise, sit quietly and think over your mistake.

Sleep is good, everyone should get some. .