Embarassing Stories
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Women's Embarrassing Moments....
Curl Up and Die
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
asked
loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?"
Melinda Lowe,
39, Seguin, TX
Pad, please!
An insurance man visited me at home to talk about our mortgage
insurance.
He
was throwing a lot of facts and figures at me, and I wanted to follow as
best
I could, so I told my 6-year-old son to run and get me a pad. He came
back
and handed me a Kotex right in front of our guest.
Kathy Newman,
46,Winston-Salem, NC
Ho, Ho, Ho
I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into the bathroom and
wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he looked
adorable,
so I ran for my camera and took a few shots. They came out so well that
I
had
copies made and included one with each of our Christmas cards. Days
later,
a
relative called about the picture, laughing hysterically, and suggesting
I
take a closer look. Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was shocked to
discover that in addition to my son, I had captured my reflection in the
mirror - wearing nothing but a camera!
Name Withheld
Lady Golfer
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was
unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for
several
minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works
at
the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at
him
and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."
Colleen Collins,
31, Ferndale, MI
Nuts about You
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
variety
of
nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter
asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your
nuts."
My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned
beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me
forget.
Faye Emerick,
34, Ellerslie, MD
Priceless
One of the funniest "most-embarrassing-moment" stories I've come upon in
a
long time was about a lady who picked up several items at a discount
store.
When she finally got up to the checker, she learned that one of her
items
had
no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the
intercom
and boomed out for all the store to hear, "PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN,
TAMPAX, SUPER SIZE." That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of
the
store apparently misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a
business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO YOU WANT
THE
KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A
HAMMER?"
Mom's Advice
A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was
squirming
around, scratching his crotch and not paying attention. She went back to
find
out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he
had
just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told
him
to go down to the principal's office. He was to phone his mother and ask
her
what he should do about it. He did it and returned to his class.
Suddenly,
there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to
investigate
only to find him sitting at his desk with his penis hanging out. "I
thought
I
told you to call your Mom." She screamed. "I did," he said, "And she
told
me
that if I could stick it out till noon, she'd come and pick me up from
school."