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Raw is War Results

Commentated by Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler

Welcome everyone, welcome to RAW is WAR! Raw started off with HHH and Stephanie McMahon came out and cut a promo consisting of a fake tribute to Mick Foley. It started off showing some highlights of his career, and finished off with him picking his a$$. This was followed by an entrance by Shane McMahon accompanied by The Big Show. Told how he decided to align with a true champion. Then The Rock came out and was told that he must now start from the bottom and try to make his way back up. He was then told he would be going face to face with The Brooklyn Brawler later in the night.

Then they went to a backstage camera which showed the Hardys arguing with the Acolytes. The Hardys challanged the Acolytes to a match, flipped the Acolytes table over, and then ran away.

Matt and Jeff Hardy vs. The Acolytes

Matt with a suicide plancha, but gets caught. Jeff with a sucide plancha. Back in the ring, Matt and Jeff double team Farooq. All of a sudden, it's Farooq and Bradshaw on Matt. Bradshaw stays in and whips Matt and hits him with a big boot for a two count. Bradshaw sits Matt on the top rope, but Matt fights back with a tornado DDT. Jeff tagged in, but gets leveled right away. Jeff with a forearm after a whip then goes for a crossbody and gets caught into a fallaway slam. Farooq in for a two count. Jeff with an inside cradle for a two then gets leveled by Farooq. Jeff gets thrown into Bradshaw's boot and Farooq continues to beat Jeff down. Bradshaw tagged in and hits a huge clothesline. Bradshaw draws Matt in. Bradshaw carries Jeff to the corner and tags in Farooq. Farooq with some rights on Jeff. Farooq goes for the Dominator, but Jeff slips out and levels Farooq. Bradshaw tagged in and he knocks Matt down to prevent the tag. Jeff goes into the corner and makes a blind tag while executing a backflip over Bradshaw. That was the sweetest tag you'll ever see. Jeff rolls out of the ring with Farooq following. Matt hits the twist of fate on Bradshaw for the pinfall.

WINNERS: Matt and Jeff Hardy

This was followed by a brief clip of Kurt Angle talking to a WWF backstage usher about which belt weighs more. One of the funniest promos I have ever seen.

European Title Match: Rikishi vs. Kurt Angle

Angle's music hits and he comes out thanking New York City. Unlike Darryl Strawberry, the only thing he is addicted to his capturing championships. He says he is willing to put the Euro title on the line to anyone. As a man of integrity, any wrestler is more than welcome to take the Olympic Challenge. Anyone else notice Angle's music is not new. I was watchig Badd Blood and Survivor Series 97. The Patriot and Vader used that music as did The American Team at SS. Rikishi accepts the challenge. Rikishi dominating Angle. Rikishi drops the leg after a powerslam. Angle crawls in the corner and Rikishi goes to put his ass in Angles face. Angle with a modified chop block to get out of the way. After a few more chop blocks, Rikishi hits the samoan drop. He throws Angle in the corner then sits on Angle and rubs his backside in Angle's face. Angle grabs the belts and walks away. Angle grabs the mic and tells Rikishi the people came to see a wrestling match, not Rikishi's butt in his face. Jericho's music hits. Jericho tells Angle he is a giant ass and people want to see Angle get the stink face once again. Angle thrown back in the ring and Rikishi hits the Rikishi Driver. Rikishi pulls Angle to the corner and hits the Bonzai Drop. The Radicals come down and attack Jericho, Chyna, and Rikishi. Too Cool comes down and cleans house. I was really hoping Rikishi would win the belt. Maybe he could give some credit back to the belt. Rikishi tries to leave, but Sexay stops him. Jericho and Chyna try to leave, but Sexay and Scotty stop them. They got thos magic shades for Chyna and Jericho. Too Cool's music hits and all five of them dance. The only funny thing about this is how bad of a dancer Chris Jericho is.

Winner: Rikishi

Backstage, Michael Cole interviewing Jericho. Cole asks Jericho what happened. Jericho starts to talk, but Saturn tries to get to Jericho. Saturn issues a challange to Jericho.

Edge/Christian vs. Headcheese

Terri comes ringside with a garbage bag of something and Terri joins the announce team. Snow comes out and says no one knows better than he does that you need a personality and an entrance to get over with the fans. Blackman comes out to new entrance music and Steve doesn't look to happy. Edge and Snow start in the ring. JR asks Terri why she turned her back on the Hardy's. Terri says the Hardy's only came twice a week to see her instead of seven. Christian tagged in and gets a two count. Blind tag by Blackman. Snow with a drop toe hold and Blackman with a leg drop. Blackman with a snap suplex then headbutts to the heart. A headcheese chant starts. Blackman with a backbreaker and he goes to the middle rope. Blackman with an elbow to Christians back. Snow tagged in and hits a bridging german suplex for two. Snow hits a scoop slam and he goes to the top. Edge walks down the rope distracting the ref and Christian crothches Snow. Edge and Blackman tagged in. Spinning heel kick by Edge and Snow breaks it up. Edge sets up for the spear, but Snow trips him up. Terri pulls a cheese hat out of her bag and Blackman gets distracted. Christian hits a drop kick and Blackman walks right into Edge's spear. Edge and Christian look confused about Terri being on their side. Why are they complaining? I read I think on the LoP message boards about Edge using the spear. I don't agree with the reasoning behind what that person said (Edge isn't big enough to use that move), but I don't think he should use it. The downward spiral is a much better move.

Winners: Edge/Christian

The Rock vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Trivia time. What history does Rock have with Steve Lombardi (Brooklyn Brawler)? The answer at the end of the match. Whoa, no catchphrases from Rock? Rock attacks Brawler before he can even get in the ring. Rock beating down Brawler on the ramp. Back in the ring, Braler gets some kicks in the corner. Rock reverses and gets Brawler in the corner. Beats him with some rights and then hits the Rock Bottom for the win. Rock says HHH thinks he's really cute. Trivia answer...Rock had his VERY first wrestling match against the Brooklyn Brawler in Corpus Christi, TX in a dark match.

Winner: The Rock

This match was followed by Rock talking about the following: Rock says HHH thinks he's going to beat Brawler and go back to his hotel. Rock says that ain't gonna happen. He don't want to leave New York City. He calls out HHH. He's says it won't be a title match. It won't be a No. 1 contender match. It will be a Rock kicking HHH's ass. Steph tries to hold HHH back and Shane's music hits. Shane tells HHH to chill. Shane says Rock will start going at him then asks to put the title up. Shane says the WWF championship will be defended at Wrestlemania against the Big Show. Rock says if Wrestlemania is going to be HHH and Big Show, WM will absolutely suck! Steph says Rock has one last chance. If he can pin either HHH or Big Show tonight in a handicap match, Rock can become the No. 1 contender. HHH says if he don't pin either one, this is Rock's last chance. The repeats what Steph just said and It doesn't matter if that's the Rock's last chance. He says he will kick their ass tonight if you smell what the Rock is cooking. The Rock actually not using too many repetitive catch phrases, finally back to good interviews from him.

Chirs Jericho w/Chyna vs. Perry Saturn w/Dean Malenko

Chyna's music hits and she comes out with that neat cannon thingie. Saturn goes right after Jericho. Jericho hits a clothesline and takes Saturn down to the mat. Jericho with stiff chops. Saturn hangs on to a whip and hits a T-Bone suplex. Saturn drives his should into Jericho's midsection. Jericho was scoop slammed but gets out of the way of a middle rope leg drop. Saturn with more chops and whips Jericho into the other corner and Jericho gets the boot up. Saturn whipped into the corner and Jericho hits a bulldog. Jericho misses a clothesline and Saturn goes for a hurricanrana, but Jericho hangs on and powerbombs him. Jericho goes for the lionsault, but Malenko pulls the rope out of his way. Malenko attacks both Jericho and Chyan. Chyan thrown in the ring and T-Boned by Saturn. Jerhico back in and he gets attacked in the corner. Saturn sets up for a suplex, but Chyna low blows him. Jericho hits the lionsault while Malenko is held out of the ring by Chyna.

Winner: Chris Jericho

They then cut backstage showing a clip of DX where Road Dogg and X-Pac are arguing with Bad Ass about who's going to wrestle the tag title match tonight. HHH comes in and says Edge and Christian are the no. 1 contenders, but HHH is going to use some executive stroke. HHH says X-Pac and Dogg are in the match. Billy takes it personally and tells HHH that with one arm, he's better than HHH. Billy gets beat down by X-Pac and HHH.

Hardcore Title Match: Mark Henry w/Mae Young vs. Crash Holly

The fans start chanting Elroy in the direction of Crash. Holly tries to tie up, but Henry is too big. Holly baseball slides out and looks underneath the ramp. He doesn't get nothing before Henry gets to him. Back to the ring, Henry is thrown into the ring post and he goes underneath the ring for a 2x4. Henry thrown back in and Crash kicks him down in the corner. Henry whips Crash into the corner and splashes him. Crash thrown halfway across the ring. Mae gets in the ring and stops Henry. Mae does a splash of her own on Crash. She starts clutching her stomach and Mark calls for the EMT's. Moolah, and the EMT's come out. They roll her onto the stretcher. I'm all for this love angle, but this pregnancy angle didn't work with Terri, Val, and D'Lo and it's definately not working this time. Why even have a match like this? It was a complete waste of time.

Winner: Crash Holly in the worst match ever composed on WWF Raw is War

We are told Mae is in labor which would be impossible because if she was pregnant, it would only be 3-4 months. Mae is shown backstage being stretchered into a room to deliver because they can't make it to the hospital.

Tazz vs. Chris Benoit w/Eddie Guerrero

Collar and Elbow tie up and Benoit ends up with his back in the corner. The ref breaks it up and Benoit throws Tazz in the ropes. An elbow followed by a suplex for a two count. Tazzplex by Tazz, but the ref is distracted by Eddie. Tazz picks Benoit up and hits a modified spine-buster, but Eddie distracts the ref again. Teddy Long throws Eddie out of here. Eddie goes to the back. Tazz whips Benoit into the rope, but Chris hangs on. Chris hits his rolling german suplex, but on the third one, Tazz locks on the Kata Hajime, but Bossman and Prince Albert attack Tazz. Benoit hits the third suplex and Albert keeps drilling Tazz. Tazz gets up and fights back. He locks on the Kata Hajime on Bossman, but Albert breaks it up. Bossman gets a chair and Albert hits a choke-power bomb. Albert picks Tazz up in the reverse fireman' carry and hits a modified neck breaker on the chair. Bossman gets on the stick and says Tazz sucks as much as NYC does. Bossman says the mood is about to change. What is up with the last 10 minutes. They've absolutely sucked. They ruined what could have been a GREAT technical match with Tazz and Benoit.

Winner: Tazz via DQ

Mae Young shown backstage with Henry, Patterson, Moolah, and Brisco with an EMT getting ready to have the baby. She says she's ont having the baby until she gets a cigar. Gerald gets her a cigar and she calms down. Patterson lights her cigar. The ONLY EMT in the room asks Mae the last time she had her period. Mae says 1957. The EMT takes Henry aside and asks if he's sure he impregnated Mae. Brisco looks under the cover and almost loses his lunch.

This is probably the worst angle (I donít even know if it would be considered an angle) I have ever witnessed. This is disgusting, not funny, and better stop soon, because itís causing me to change the channel whenever I see her.

Mae is shown again backstage and she farts (?) nausiating everyone in the room. Moolah is telling Mae to push and the EMT says he can't get it. Patterson goes for a pair of plyers and the EMT reaches in and brings out a hand. What the hell?! At least they make a joke and Patterson says to give Mae a hand. What is the point? Seriously.

Tag Team Title Match Dudley Boyz vs. X-Pac/Road Dogg

Dudleys set up some tables outside the ring. DX comes out to Road Dogg's music. Tori is wearing the SAME top, but at least she has accessorized with a jacket. Road Dogg and X-Pac jump in and try to ambush the Dudleys. D-Von sends X-Pac out. Modified 3-D on Road Dogg. Buh-Buh suplexes Road Dogg and knocks x-Pac off the apron. Buh-Buh wish bones Rod Dogg then punches him in the stomach. D-Von tagged in and hits an elbow on Road Dogg. Snap mare by D-Von into a submission neck breaker on Road Dogg. Road Dogg gets some rights and hits a sunset flip. Buh-Buh calling for the tag, but D-Von can't reach. Road Dogg pulls D-Von over for two. D-Von gets up and hits a clothesline and tags Buh-Buh. Buh-Buh with a series of elbows for a two. Buh-Buh and Road Dogg exchange Flair chops and Road Dogg hammers on Buh-Buh. Road Dogg into the ropes and ducks the clothesline. RD jukes and jives, but has to finish on D-Von. Buh-Buh regains his balance and levels Road Dogg. RD in the corner and hits a boot to Buh-Buh. X-Pac tagged in a hits a couple spinning heel kicks. Buh-Buh misses in the corner and X-Pac hits the bronco buster. Halfway through the move. Kane's music hits. Kane comes down and chokeslams Road Dogg, then D-Von, then Buh-Buh Ray. X-Pac has long since retreated.

Winners: None

HHH, Stephanie , Shane, and Big Show shown talking backstage.

A REAL video package of Mick Foley shown to the tune of "I Will Remember You" The MSG crowd gives him a standing ovation and chants Foley.

No. 1 Contender handicap match Big Show/HHH w/Shane and Stephanie vs. Rock

HHH and Big Show argue over who's going to start. HHH overruled Big Show and went right after Rock. HHH with some punches into the corner. HHH gets leveled by a clothesline and thrown over the ropes. Rock knocks Big Show off the apron and Rock goes outside to get HHH. They fight back up the ramp. Big Show comes up from behind and hits Rock. Big Show has Rock in a headlock and drags him back to the ring. Rock gets his face introduced to the guardrail and gets thrown in the ring. Rock with a clothesline on HHH and HHH hits a neckbreaker. Big Show tagged in. Big Show with a backbreaker and a leg drop on Rock. HHH tagged in and he gets a shot to Rock's midsection. HHH kicks Rock down in the corner. HHH chokes Rock. Hebner breaks it up. Big Show tagged in. HHH with a suplex and Big Show hits an elbow drop. Big Show headbutts Rock right into the wrong corner. HHH tagged in Rock gets a head of steam and goes after HHH. HHH sidesteps the Rock and throws him outside. Big Show goes after him and knocks him back in the ring. HHH with the knee to the face for a two count. Big Show tagged in. Boot to the midsection by Big Show. Big Show with a headlock and tags HHH back in. Kick to the midsection by HHH. Rock and HHH trade rights till Rock gets momentum. Rock hits a swinging neckbreaker. Rock goes for a back body drop, but instead gets a knee to the face. Big Show tagged in. BS and HHH double team Rock. Rock ducks a clothesline and BS hits HHH. Rock with a DDT on Big Show. All three guys are down. Rock and HHH up first. Rock with a spinebuster on HHH. Big Show knocked out of the ring. Shane knocked off the apron. Rock Bottom on HHH. The worst move in wrestling hit on HHH. Shane maeks the save and Hebner calls for the bell. Rock gets up pissed and HHH goes after Rock. Rock turnes around and Shane low blows Rock. Big Show, HHH, and Shane tripe team Rock. Rock gets a chokeslam from Big Show. That's it?!?! What kind of ending is that?!?!
Winner: Rock via DQ

That was a WEAK show. Especially after a somewhat decent PPV.