personal essay, circa 1983, Montclair NJ



where am i? lotsa "cassetteculture" oriented mail today. wow. so much, almost Too much Talk. networking is great, it seems EVERYbody "releases" weirdnss tapes. great, but...ja ever get a tape from some "ahtist" that was Ho-Hum??? such Sacrilege! that little audiocartridge is/could be/will forever remain GOD, and herewegoagain, EVERYbody jumping on the "Band" wagon, ssuddebly it's not so Underground, another Novel Format succumbs to ZeroContent (in terruption)...where am i? was i "complainin'?" Again??? am i possibly disturbed by the New Competition? am i gettin' tired-a still seein' all these same ole Opular names (like everybodyelse8s gettin tired-a always seein MAH name)? Cassettes? tell me about it!
Tapes for People. I gotta song named that. tapes is a disease. I'm totally immersed by LENGTHS of tapes, C-time as Daytime (incl. Night). I been into tapes (as survival) since the 60's, long before'sets. reels, man. good scented backcoated Pro-tape. shinycheap droppout orangebrown gummysplice Budgetape. free tape. fuckin techno $20 tape. CONTENT: as well also and in addition to: have tapes of EVERY thing imaginable. Help! reels and 'sets and reels w/o boxes and empty 'set boxes and 45s everywhere and 4 or 5 or 6 ailingsomewhat Decks and 12" platters creepin out across the floor. Too many ALL! yes ma'am & my own music too. yes ma'am, I am also anothercomposer. Been doin Collages for many a year. Fill-ups, we call em. whethert's what my friends do, what I may do (or Say I do), what records are available, what's worth "Saving" from all I receive in the mail, whatever sounds right for Me. I am the Greatest. I am a Tape.
Like much of the New Competition, I crave Amateur tapes, captured human triviality, the sound of someone's little sister, clicks, pops, edits, lack of edits, waste, stolen sound, candid cassettes, HISS, dolby confusion, VARIETY, real lost Talent (like myself), removing the erasure-prevention tab (or Creating one on a stupid Rrock demo'set), duping miraclegeniusmoments for fellow enthusiasts, and being the Greatest while remaining modest, harmble & aloof. How did I get started? Cassettes just happened to come along (mid-late 70's) at the perfect moment. By then I already had about 30 2-sided reels of RSM material, and logically, my Cassette Club was born unto itself. Now, with 150 friggin ''releases'', I've created a suicidal monster. Always, I mean, Always MAKIN'TAPES. poor poor decks. hi-speed multi-duping? Forget it. Buy me one. I have a box of hundreds of names of "customers" and what they sent when and for which tapes. Some try me out, then are gone. Some continue to surprise me from out of the wouldwork with occasional Big checks. Some drive me to tears (good and bad) by COLLECTING every possible ips I've ever produced (or even considered producing). I lose track. Just like a head gap. I am the Highest Bias ever imagined. I am Tape, the Ruler of the Fuckin Pseudocosmic Galaxies 'n B'yond.
I shouldn't have started this ramble. I don't know what I'm tryin to say. I have really no advice or suggestions on ''how to best utilize the cassette or mailorder or ArtPhilosphy conceptz''. well that's just Great, isn't it? hold on, i gotta give an ID...
...ok, back now. what was I sayin? pausebutton ain't workin every time. wait. now i find out a 60 ain't long enough! gotta start all over again!! better write notes down. i'll forget. need blanks. again? what to who? freebies and freebies and even debts paid by cassettes. whose check bounced??? RRRING! now, some idiot tracked down my # and wants to let me know what he liked about one side of one tape, and yes, oh yes, WHY did I do ________?

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AUOT.....AUTOMATIC REVERSE. While recording? no, only Playback. As soon as it senses leader, Bing! Head assembly revolves in a plitsecond. Yeh, but quality ain't as good. Stop it, and Eject Taype, turn it around, use otherside in still Forward drection. Robin? Wake up. You're snoring on Condenser Mike, and he's Pissed!
Cassettes? Cassettes can/should be for anything one wants them to be. What? Language courses? Right on. DBX synth yawning? Farr out. Cutesy Newmusic dancepop parodies (unknown beknownst to them)? Sure, submit to Geffen. To preserve baby's first XmasMorn? By all means. Personal letters? Contact! 4 avoiding vinyl trappings? But of couse. By mail? Obviously. 4 typical ROIR shobiz hype? Bulk it. 24 C-60's for a day? Clever, but betterstill would be 16 C-90's. Sorry. Space, y'know? MY space. Walkmans? OK, but Use it! And not ONLY IT. Cassingles? Y? Like a 2 minute cut on a 12 inch. EPs? Limits limits limits. Y all the Limits. I no.
      Legalities? Wow, right, yeh, Controversy. well, my bible sez Steal (what cha can). Cassettes enable effortlessness. I dunno no copyrights or transparent ''laws'' or artistic moral royaltee bullship. Again, EVERYbody makin Big stinx about SOCIAL PARANOIA leaves me pleasantly ignorant. Naiev knave. In a sense, innocence. GENUINE INNER SINCERITY with a dash of huma. Ain't nobody deserve nuthin. Rewards shouldbe Surprize! Way o' the world, anyway. Ethics burn my ass. Sorry. We all wanna be heard, right? If it means by wordomouth or Physical Duplication, it's to be. To be. Authorize is an irrelevant verb. I have been chuckling at this issue for many years now. It's just like love/hate boy/girl relationships. Such Paradox! One puts his VULNERABLE self out for grabs, and presto! Conditions, rules, expectations, obligations, the death of Surprise. Limits limits limits.
What do I like (on cassette)? afore mentioned. Walls of Genius are tops (in their "field"). John Oswald sometimes has me jumpin fer joy (when I'm "in the mood"). Subgenius I'm tired of. Sorry. They've been nice to me. BEST TAPES are Always new people, first attempts, obscure anonymous. Some folks keep sending me 2 or 3 at a time, and they're All similar! Wipe it! I even am forced to compile Best-of's of some of these entrants (?). Priority. Life is a tape. Overplayed. Rewound too fast. CrinkleSnapppp!! Life is a tape that is enjoyed, appreciated, raved about for a weaker two, then S-T-O-R-E-D for extended centuries of non-prioritease. Like sex. Like NewReleaseLPs. Like insane classic correspondence like this that you wish you'd chuck in the garbge after finishing it. And then . . . . . . . . REDISCOVERY! (repeat: SUR PRISE is Religiom) Surprise Dranscends LIMITS. Cassettes R A Pair o' Docks.


     I been rekordin and tapin and "compozing" for so long at such an alarming rate that I've had to kinda give-up, several times. Tiz a disease. Who's the greatest? Who can AFFORD to be? I been thru noise-art screech, to polyphonic beat symphonies, inside punk postpunk glitter glametal, to gorgeaux