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Biography (not A&E)

It was a cool, rainy April evening. The prevailing mood at Mercer Hospital in scenic Trenton, NJ was one of eager anticipation. A father paced back and forth in the waiting room. Little did he know that the courses of this very evening would change the world. Forever.

Jim Cortina, soon to be known as Jim Cortina Sr, could smell the pain his wife was in. She screamed, and screamed and made Jim, an ex frat guy, blush. Had she not been in such extreme pain, or such a situation, screams like this would normally cause Jim (and many other people) to run screaming.

The she in question is Michele Cortina (at the time, she is now Michele Toboz). The pain in question is me, squeezing my way into the world like so many engorged corks from champagne bottles (although I doubt I made the cool "Pop!" noise).

About an hour and two pair of salad tongs later (I don't wanna talk about it), I was tossed into an incubator, and the earth shook. Nearly twenty years later here you are, reading my webpage. What, you ask, has happened in those twenty years? More than you care to know, my friend.

I've been beaten, bruised, arrested, punished, heartbroken, broken hearts, set on fire, electrocuted, shot, stabbed, attacked by a shark, and tourtured as a political dissident. And that, is what I did on my summer vacation. OK, you can delete four of those phrases in the last sentence, but just for fun, I'm not going to tell you which ones.

Well... if you're really all that interested in the details of those years, email me (go to the contact page). If I have the time, I'll tell you. As exciting things happen, I'll add them to this biography, I'd hate to end it here.