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sometimes words *can* be enough...

just some quotations that were meaningful to me from various

River of Deceit
by Mad Season

my pain is self chosen
at least, so the Prophet says
i could either burn
or cut off my pride, and buy some time
a head full of lies is the weight tied to my waist
the River of Deceit pulls down
the only direction of flow is down
down, oh down..
my pain is self chosen
at least i believe it to be
i could either drown
or pull off my skin and swim to shore
now i can grow a beautiful shell for all to see

from "As Good as it Gets"

Carol: I'm sorry--whatever this is, its not gonna work.

Melvin: I'm feeling better, Carole.

Carole: Melvin, even though it may seem that way now, you don't know me that well. I'm not the answer for you.

Melvin: Hey, I've got a great compliment for you.

Carole: You know what--

Melvin: Just let me talk, let me talk. I might be the only person on the face of the earth that knows you're the greatest woman on earth. I might be the only one that appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing that you do; how you are with Spencer--Spence--and in every single thought that you have and how you say what you mean and how you almost always mean something that is all about being straight and good. I think most people miss that about you, and I watch them wondering how can they watch you bring their food and clear their tables, and never get it that they just met the greatest woman alive. The fact that I get it makes me feel good about me. Is that something thats bad for you to be around?

Carole: no...

"Perhaps when everything is beautiful, nothing is beautiful." -Stanley Kubrick

from "TRUST"

Maria: Did you mean it? Would you marry me?
Matthew: Yes.
Maria: Why?
Matthew: Because I want to.
Maria: Not because you love me or anything like that, huh?
Matthew: I respect and admire you.
Maria: Isn't that love?
Matthew: No, that's respect and admiration. I think that's better than love.
Maria: How?
Matthew: When people are in love they do all sorts of crazy things. They get jealous, they lie, they cheat. They kill themselves. They kill each other.
Maria: It doesn't have to be that way.
Matthew: Maybe.
Maria: You'd be the father of a child you know isn't yours.
Matthew: Kids are kids, what does it matter?
Maria: Do you trust me?
Matthew: Do you trust me first?
Maria: I trust you.
Matthew: You sure?
Maria: Yes.
Matthew: Then marry me.
Maria: I'll marry you if you admit that respect, admiration, and trust equals love.
Matthew: OK. They equal love.

Matthew: I'm sorry. I lost my head.
Maria: It's OK.
Matthew: What do we do now?
Maria: We could run?
Matthew: We'd never make it.
Maria: I'll tell them it was my fault.
Matthew: They'll never believe you.
Maria: I don't care if they believe me or not.
Matthew: Why have you done this?
Maria: Done what?
Matthew: Why do you put up with me like this?
Maria: Somebody had to.
Matthew: But why you?
Maria: I just happened to be here.

"you make a living with what you get, you make a life with what you give." --winston churchill

by Sarah McLachlan

you spend all your time waiting for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
there's always some reason you feel not good enough
and its hard at the end of the day
i need some distraction, oh beautiful world
memories seep through my veins
let me empty and weightless and maybe i'll find some peace tonight..

in the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you were brought from the wreckage of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here..

so tired of this straight life
and everywhere you turn there's vultures and thieves at your back
the storm keeps on twisting
keep on building the lies that you make up for all that you lack
it don't make no difference, escape one last time
its easier to believe in this sweet madness
oh this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees..

in the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you were brought from the wreckage of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here..

from "The X-Files"
episode 4X15 "Memento Mori" from Scully to Mulder..

For the first time, I feel time like a heartbeat, the seconds pumping in my breast like a reckoning; the numinous mysteries that once seemed so distant and unreal threatening clarity in the presence of a truth entertained not in youth, but only in its passage. I feel these words as if their meaning were weight being lifted from me, knowing that you will read them and share my burden as I have come to trust no other. That you should know my heart, look into it, finding there the memory and experience that belong to you, that are you, is a comfort to me now as I feel the tethers loose and the prospects darken for the continuance of a journey that began not long ago, and which began again with a faith shaken and strengthened by your convictions. If not for which I might never have been so strong now as I cross to face you and look at you incomplete, hoping that you will forgive me for not making the rest of the journey with you.
And if the darkness should have swallowed me as you read this, you must never think there was the possibility of some secret intervention, something you might have done. And though we've traveled far together, this last distance must necessarily be traveled alone.

from Demian by Hermann Hesse

"And she told me about a youth who had fallen in love with a planet. He stood by the sea, stretched out his arms and prayed to the planet, dreamed of it, and directed all his thoughts to it. But he knew, or felt he knew, that a star cannot be embraced by a human being. He considered it to be his fate to love a heavenly body without any hope of fulfillment and out of this insight he considered an entire philosophy of renunciation and silent, faithful suffering that would improve and purify him. Yet all his dreams reached the planet. Once he stood again on the high cliff at night by the sea and gazed at the planet and burned with love for it. And at the height of his longing he leaped into the emptiness toward the planet, but at the instant of leaping "its impossible" flashed once more through his mind. There he lay on the shore, shattered. He had not understood how to love. If at the instant of leaping he had had the strength of faith in fulfillment of his love he would have soared into the heights and been united with the star."

"Gloomy Sunday" as sung by Billie Holiday

Sunday is gloomy,
My hours are slumberless
Dearest the shadows
I live with are numberless
Little white flowers
Will never awaken you
Not where the black coach of
Sorrow has taken you
Angels have no thoughts
Of ever returning you
Wouldn't they be angry
If I thought of joining you?

Gloomy Sunday

Gloomy is sunday,
With shadows I spend it all
My heart and I
Have decided to end it all
Soon there'll be candles
And prayers that are said I know
But let them not weep
Let them know that I'm glad to go
Death is no dream
For in death I'm caressin' you
With the last breath of my soul
I'll be blessin' you

Gloomy Sunday

Dreaming, I was only dreaming
I wake and I find you asleep
In the deep of my heart here
Darling I hope
That my dream never haunted you
My heart is tellin' you
How much I wanted you
Gloomy Sunday