"Come on along and listen to the lullabye of Broadway...."
NPYNC ON BROADWAY!!
First, thanks for the picture, Michelle. I really appreciate it~~Marianne
Look at those outfits. Look at the acting (Why God? Why did you spend so much time on this boy to send him off to WAR? and by god, why is that girl wearing a beret?) They've got us all convinced that God Must Have Spent Too Much Time on us...Like they aren't screaming for the attention only theater can give you. I've seen Lance tap dance. He's a hoofer. And Justin is such Fosse material: the way his dancing flows.
So, what is this about you ask? Well, it is inevitable. Someday, Npync will end and the guys will be faced with the harsh reality that not many people like them anymore. First, they will cry. They will cry a lot. Then, following in other former pop stars shoes (Debbie Gibson, Toni Braxton, Donny Osmond, David Cassidy) they will head for Broadway. If Broadway will have them.
Sue and I, along with the input of a few of our friends have picked out roles for them that would be perfect. It's either this or dinner theater in senior citizen homes. We'll let them decide...
We have also, well, I (this is Mare by the way) have worked on my very own Broadway Musical for the guys...It's called, "The Pleather Chronicles"
BROADWAY ROLES
LansteN
This was a hard one...I had to consult my good friend, Amy-the-great, and she helped us with the decision. Unfortunately, like in the pop world, most leads on Broadway aren't Bass. But we picked some anyway.
Anybody in FIVE GUYS NAMED MO...yes, we know. Gutsy choice for the albino of the group, but it made us laugh. Then we got a little crazy...like shouting out "Smokey Joe's Cafe" and him playing Colehouse in RAGTIME...What's important is that we amuse ourselves.
I tried to convince everyone he could play Billy Flynn in CHICAGO...but it fell on deaf ears. ("All he needs is love..." yeah, i'll give him some loving...)
Hey, I just thought of one...he could so pull off Chauvelin in SCARLET PIMPERNEL. YAY! And he'd be wearing all black and acting, "SO FRANCH ZAT I CEN HARDLY STANDS ZEET!" or better yet Mufasa in LION KING...although no favorite Nsyncer of mine is allowed to be in Lion King. Nope. Boo...we spit on the Lion King. Disney and Theater: DON'T MIX. Remember that, boys 'n girls. (although because of Adam Pascal, I now have to sit through Aida. God help me!)
ChriP
tee-hee. Most of these were with the braids that we imagined it. He had to go and get gorgeous on us...
Mimi in RENT...C'mon...he could do "Out Tonight" like we've never heard it before. And wouldn't Roger be surprised?
Kim in MISS SAIGON...I think that says it all right there.
What's that? A guy role? For Chris? Do you know how hard that is? Most leading male roles don't sing quite as high as Chris...but fine. Holy Lance! The only one at all suitable is....:DRUM ROLL PLEASE:
Emcee in CABARET...He'll never be Alan Cummings but then again...chris would be kinda funny to watch in the role.
JoeY
Before we go any further, if you haven't figured it out yet, I'm quite repulsed by the dumb idiot. I don't get it girls. Maybe some of you can explain it! Why is he so damn attractive to seemingly sane people? ::Shudders:: Although, I do enjoey some of the stories I hear about him...but back to the subject...Broadway roles...
In the crystal ball, we see Joey as Hyde in JEKYLL AND HYDE..but only Hyde. Hyde likes to wear furry things and frequents whorehouses...sound at all familiar?
He would also make a great Beast in BEAUTY AND THE BEAST...do we need to elaborate? He is just an oversized animal...isn't he?
I hate CATS so I say, Joey could play any part in that show. It bothers me. It would finally close if Joey joined the cast. One can hope!
One more...Sandy in ANNIE. And before you all quesition me, yes, sandy is the dog. "dumb dog, why are you following me?"
JustiN
Justin is the only one that trains his voice and does vocal exercises everyday. Really, he is the only one I could say might survive on Broadway. He could be the next Adam Pascal. ( I know...Who? Now, I'll send Adam the link..mwhahahaha. Never cross a Virgo!)
Justin could play The Man in RENT. I've seen it done worse. Someone actually suggested to me that he play Marc Cohen. Now, this is an Npync page and most of you have probably not seen RENT...but let's just use Sue's reply, "Yeah, let's have the posterboy for the Aryan nation play Marc Cohen."
He would make an excellent Chris is MISS SAIGON, ironically enough opposite Chris as Kim. that sounds confusing. But picture the possibilities...
Finally, having seen FOOTLOOSE like a few times now...Justin would make a good Ren. He can dance. He can sing..and sometimes, he can whine with the best of them. He can try to be as good as Jeremy (* who is in a boyband of his own known as Freshstep...interested in finding out more? Click here They are awesome! Mad Comedy! And Jeremy is a sweetie!) But oh yeah, this is an Npync page...so Justin could sing, "Footloose" and "Heaven Helps the Man" and be a part of a musical that has his theme song in it.
JC
Ahh, finally, the sexy bastard...formerly known as JC. Hhhhmmmm....
He fits the Roger pants from RENT so well. The role is also that of a recovering crackhead...And he is turning in to mini-Adam (the original Roger), meaning he is lop-sided and wears gross clothes...Plus, as Roger it is often encouraged to miss notes...Unless it's Christian Mena. He doens't miss notes. He's a god. (right meesh? Bel?) BUT HE'S NOT AS GOOD AS NORBIE! HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE (love, susan)
Barrett in TITANIC...nothing funny to say about that one. It's just is what it is...TITANIC stunk though, except for the role of Barrett...Too bad he dies at the end. (Susie is smiling picturing JC dying at the end)
***There you have it...We want your suggestions. If you are an all-round, cultured NPYNC fan and love the theater as much as I do...share your suggestions...We shall put them up...and give you full credit..
There are also some of you for whom this section makes no sense...at least that part...We do apologize, but we found it humorous. We've seen all these shows so it's easy for us to picture them in the roles...Hopefully, this next Broadway bit, will amuse you...and you don't have to have ever seen a play before....it's my little idea of humor...
THE PLEATHER CHRONICLES
The curtain rises.
Justin is standing center stage, in a head-to-toe pleather catsuit. He leaps forward and "Meows." He begins to sing, "I feel pretty...Oh so pretty...in pleather...not leather...I feel pretty...and witty, and i'm not gay!"
JC enters stage left. He breaks out into the running man. He is in a long pleather trenchcoat in hot pink. He points to the audience and sings, "How do you buy yourself nice clothes...when no one sells pleather anymore? Pleather pants, pleather jackets...How we gonna buy? How we gonna buy? Pleather...Our pleather! I love pleather!"
From both sides of the stage, Chris and Joey enter doing flips in Blue pleather jumpsuits. They join Justin in the back and start singing, "Ease on down...ease on down, the catwalk. I've got pleather, pants made of feather. I'm a dork. Hey, who stole my fork?"
Lance enters stage right in orange pleather pants, no shirt, and a tie. He comes in and yells, "Oh yeah! That's what you think???" He turns to the audience, "that's my new philosophy."
"Anything you can wear, I can wear better. I can wear anything better
than you," JC croons to Justin.
Justin rolls his eyes and does a few chorus line kicks, "No you can't."
"Yes I can."
"No you can't"
"Yes I can"
Joey, Chris, and Lance start to form a chorus line of their own. They
link arms and do the Rockette size kicks, "One...singular sensation...every
little step I take....One...thrilling combonation...every move that it
squeaks..."
CURTAIN FALLS
Comments? or are you feigning indifference?