Silent Storm: Part 3
This story is told in Heero's POV(point of view)
Duo and I are finally rejoining the others. We’ve only been on our own for a few weeks, but it feels like much longer. We’ve become closer in those two weeks than in all of the previous months since first meeting. I don’t know what I would’ve done if Duo hadn’t been there. He truly is a selfless person, he holds nothing back. I still don’t understand why he considers me a friend. He’s so open and alive. He tries to enjoy life to the fullest, even in the middle of a war. Me, on the other hand, I push everyone away. I live only for the mission. Well, that was before. I can’t push Duo away any longer, not now. Not since...
“Heero, you OK?” asked Duo. “I mean about joining the others and all.”
“Yes,” I answer, not really sure or not.
Quatre is running towards us, with a bright smile on his face. Trowa and Wufei are following closely behind, but at a more leisurely pace.
“Duo! Where have you been? We expected you a few days after you freed Heero,” voices Quatre as he nears. “You don’t look badly hurt,” says Quatre as he glances my way.
“Just thought it would be a good idea to let Heero recover a little bit before he throws himself back into ‘the mission,`” Duo answers, smiling the entire time.
Duo is easily steering the conversation away from what we’ve been doing and changing the topic to their activities. Even now he is trying to protect me. Why does he do that and why do I let him?
As soon as everyone enters the house, I head to my room. I don’t feel like socializing right now, not that I ever really do, but right now I really want to be alone.
“What’s wrong with him?” I hear Quatre ask Duo as I go up the stairs.
“Nothing, to my knowledge, must just be tired from the long drive,” answers Duo.
Tired? No, I’m not tired, at least not physically. I hope I’ve recovered enough. I don’t really want the others to know the details of my capture. I haven’t had a nightmare since Duo began to sleep in my bed with me, but now that I will be alone at night, I just don’t know...
Everyone is sitting at the dining room table as I walk in for dinner.
“How was your nap?” Quatre asks me, as I slid into the chair next to Duo.
Duo must be overjoyed to be back with the others because he’s talking even more than normal. The others barely have a chance to reply before he asks another question. After dinner, everyone retires to the patio for some fresh air. Trowa pulls out a deck of cards and begins to shuffle them.
“Yes! Finally, something besides solitaire!” shouts Duo.
The five of us play Old Maid until Wufei retires for the night, he’s still not completely healed. Then we partner up and play pairs' Canasta late into the night. Quatre and Trowa win. They are too familiar with each others way of thinking. Duo and I never had a chance. I rise from my chair and proceed to my room. I quickly prepare for bed and climb in, noticing how empty it feels. Fleeting pangs of panic course through me, until the bed shifts as another’s weight is added.
“I’m here,” Duo breathes in my ear as he settles next to me.
“Thank you. I didn’t think you would.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“I thought that you wouldn’t want the others to think we’re together.”
“Heero, you’re my friend and you need me right now. I’m gonna stay 'til you don’t need me any longer. Besides, it doesn’t really matter what the others think... we know that we’re not together.”
The others remain clueless about Duo sleeping in my room for several days. But that all changes when Quatre knocks on the door one morning and then enters without waiting for an answer.
“Heero, oh... uhmm, never mind,” stammers Quatre, as he hastily backs out of the room, his mouth gaping open and his eyes as big as saucers.
Duo is actually giggling, “Did you see his expression? I bet he nearly had a heart attack!”
“He’s probably telling the others right now,” I say.
“Ya... well, let them think what they want to. Unless you want them to know the real reason I sleep here.”
Duo and I walk into the dinning room and all conversation stops. The others are staring, as we slide into our normal places. Duo breaks the silence by laughing.
“Boy, Quatre, you should have seen your expression! You looked like a fish out of water.”
Leave it to Duo to know exactly what to say to put everyone at ease.
Quatre, Trowa, and Duo have been assigned a mission. Perhaps that is why I lie here in my bed unable to sleep. How could I have become so dependent on Duo, that I can’t do such a simple thing as sleep without him next to me? Is it because of what happened to me? No, I had trouble sleeping without him in the room before that. It was never quite this bad though... I muse to myself. Duo... when did I start to consider him more than an annoyance? I think it was just before the park incident.
Hmm... Duo and I never did get to the bottom of that. He seemed like he just wanted to pretend it didn’t happen. And I didn’t know what to think about it. I’ve never lost control like that before, but it was a simple task to lean forward and press my lips to Duo’s. I hadn’t planned to, but once done, I couldn’t pull myself away. I... liked... kissing Duo.
I bolt upright at that thought and contemplate the revelation.
Yes, although extremely confused at the time, I did like the feeling of having Duo so close to me. And I was... hurt that he rejected me afterwards. Then when he came and freed me from that cell, I was grateful that he had come and not one of the others. Duo has always been there for me, especially then when I needed him the most. He made me talk about the rape and didn’t judge me or think me weak. And every night he would hold me, keeping the nightmares at bay. He even goes so far as to let the others think we’re involved to protect me.
What wouldn’t he do for me... I think as sleep ultimately claims me.
Without Duo around the days are empty and the nights are torture. But the time apart forces me to come to the conclusion that Duo is more to me than just a companion, a friend, he’s someone that I can’t live without. I don’t need him to survive, but to live... truly live, for that I need Duo.
“And now that I know, what am I going to do about it?” I ask myself.
“Do about what?” says Duo, as he enters the room.
“Ya, thank goodness too, I’m so tired that I think I could sleep for a week,” he says as he strips off his clothes and climbs into bed, instantly falling asleep.
The blanket comes no higher than the top of his boxers, leaving Duo’s chest bare. I watch as his chest rises and falls with each breath he takes. His braid is half undone and the loose strands spill across his face. I reach over to brush them away, but take them in my hand instead. I rub the chestnut strands between my thumb and fingers, luxuriating at the softness of them.
I usually wake Duo when I get up, but this morning I slip out of bed and quickly get dressed without disturbing him. I grab something from the kitchen on my way to the hangar. I spend all day in Wing’s cockpit, not even emerging for lunch or dinner. It’s late when my stomach finally forces me to leave the comforting silence of Wing. I head towards the kitchen to grab something to eat before I head to bed.
“Heero, where have you been all day? Duo’s been practically climbing the walls, worrying about you,” says Quatre.
Worried? Why would he be concerned where I am? Duo had to know that I wouldn’t be too far with Wing still here. I ponder; while passing Quatre and heading to my room. Duo is standing in the middle of the room in only his boxers and brushing his long hair as I walk in.
“Heero! Where have you been? Why didn’t you wake me this morning? Is something wrong?” these questions spill from Duo’s mouth as I close the door behind me.
I walk over to Duo and stop inches from him. He finally shuts up as he notices my scrutiny. I know what I want from Duo, but does he want the same thing? He has never shown any interests beyond the confines of friendship. But I have accepted my feeling for Duo and I can’t go back, not now.
Duo must have taken my silence as a sign that I didn’t want him here because he has turned away from me and begun to pick up his clothes.
“It’s OK Heero, I understand that you don’t need me anymore. I’ll just get my things and leave.”
Please let him share these same emotions; I think as I step forward and grab Duo’s arm, pulling him against me. His eyes widen in surprise, but he doesn’t pull away. Taking that as a good sign, I place my other hand on his cheek and lean forward to brush my lips against his.
I press harder, deepening the kiss and Duo responds by parting his lips. I slide my tongue into his warm mouth. I can feel his moans of pleasure vibrating through our joined lips. As Duo responds even more by parting his lips further and using his tongue to spar with mine, I slowly lead Duo backwards towards the bed. I gently tumble us onto the bed as the back of Duo’s knees come in contact with it.
My mouth moves from Duo’s sweet lips to his arched neck. I lightly nibble along the curve between his earlobe and shoulder. Then I trace the same path with soft sucking kisses, while my fingers delicately caress Duo’s side and chest. One of Duo’s hands is in my hair at the nape of my neck, while the other is clutching my shoulder with bruising force.
My eyes meet Duo’s. There is desire and passion, but also confusion and fear in those endless burning orbs. I bring my hand up to caress Duo’s cheek and he brings his own hand up to cover mine. We lean forward to tenderly kiss one another.
“Duo, I do need you,” I murmur softly as we draw apart.
Duo looks into my eyes once again and whispers, “Heero, do you love me?”
The fear is evident in Duo’s amethyst eyes. I almost don’t want to answer for fear of loosing Duo completely, but I know that I must.
“Yes... I do.”
Duo wraps his arms around me, burying his head in the crook of my neck and nuzzles the hollow of my throat for a few minutes, then he lifts his head and looks directly at me.
“I was so afraid that you’d push me away again when you didn’t need me anymore. I... thought that I was going to lose you,” declares Duo with tears in his eyes.
“Duo, how do you feel... about me?”
“I think that I love you.”
Staring into Duo’s amethyst eyes, I no longer see any fear or confusion. I only see a burning, forever kind of love.