Live from the Greensboro Coliseum Complex in Greensboro, North Carolina!

Of course, fans are in full attendance and have their own signs to display, such as "MAIKU -- PEOPLE'S CHUMP!" "BLINK WAS ROBBED!!" "ANGEL IS THE REAL AMERICAN HERO!!" "I WANT TO FEEL AKIKO AND OSEIKO'S WILD JOY!!" among others.

Kanyon: WHO BEDDA DAN KANYON AND PAMELA!! Yo, welcome to the brand spankin' new Riot Rulz!! And damn, if this don't blow the WWF's Smackdown set away!!

Pamela: Of course it does!! We got special holographic technology that helped create ALL of this cool looking stuff, donated by EAW Co-Commisioner Shaed Bloodgrave's buddies in the Clan Justice! And what does the WWF got?

Kanyon: A big freakin' fist.

Pamela: Right! ^-^ THE SMACKDOWN SET WILL HIT YOU WITH ITS FIST!!

Kanyon: I hear the Mayhem set's just as awesome! But we'll get to all dat later! Right now--

KRAK-KOOOOOMMM!!!!!

"A Violent Reaction" cues up as the doors slide open, revealing both Kane and Christina! Christina seems a bit in awe of the new RR set, but Kane keeps going, stopping as he and Christina reach the conveyor belt that's now a part of the aisle.

Kanyon: I tell ya, that conveyor belt aisleway's gonna take some gettin' used to, but it's still freakin' cool!

Pamela: Talk about one of your unorthodox arenas... hear it's all a part of the huge revamping we're getting! New logo, new arenas... should be pretty neat!

Kane and Christina stop at the end of the conveyor belt aisle and climbs into the ring. Kane steps back to the middle, raises his arms and lets loose with the fire to the ringposts.

Kanyon: WHOA! What's also impressive is Kane's power!! Don't wanna get that big man angry!

"Duel Of The Fates" then cues. Alex comes out to the ring with a mixed reaction. He smirks, then heads out, when suddenly--

Kanyon: WAIT A SECOND!!! LOOK WHO JUST HOPPED OVER THE BARRICADE!!

Pamela: It's that masked man! The Right!! He's just confronted Nagol! It looks like he's being punked out verbally here!

Kanyon: And Alex doesn't take too kindly to the words that guy has t'say! Alex is rushing-- OHH!! AND HE RAN RIGHT INTO THAT HIGH ROUNDHOUSE KICK!! AND HERE COMES KANE!! KANE'S RUNNING AFTER THE RIGHT! AND THAT GUY JUST HIGH-TAILED IT OUTTA HERE!! Kane watches the Right rush outta there through the crowd... he's going to check on Alex, but he's not having any of that! He's swatting Kane's hand away! FLAME LINE!!! Extreme rules here, people! Referee Ayane Mitsui, welcome back BTW, rings the bell!!

Pamela: And Kane sits up! Big shock.

Kanyon: Alex is ready for him though... HURRICA--NO! POWERBOMB BY KANE!!! DAMN, Alex bounced big time on that conveyor belt! Cover! One! Two! No, Alex kicked out! Kane gets Alex up... THROAT THRUST! AND ANOTHER! AND AN-- ALEX COUNTERED! KARATE KICK TO KANE'S HEAD! And... oooohhhh, wow, he's just lookin' at that furry! ALEX WITH ANOTHER KICK TO THE GUT! DDT! AND-- Kane sits right back up. o_o!

Pamela: Glad you don't have to face him tonight, Chris?

Kanyon: Hell yeah! WAIT! ALEX OHH! SPINAL TAP KICK TO KANE'S BACK!! CHICKEN WING SLEEPER APPLIED!! BUT-- aww man, Kane gets up with Alex!!! And... FLINGS HIM ONTO HIS SHOULDER!! RUNNING POWERSLAM!!! DAMN!! Kane's just got that kinda power, y'know?

Pamela: A cornfed, don't eff with me look, Joanie Laurer was right about Kane!

Kanyon: And Kane with the chokehold!! And it's legal because it's an Extreme match! Kane lifts Nagol up by the throat!! CHOKESLAM!! NO! ALEX SQUIRMS OUT AND-- TORNADO BULLDOG!!! Cover! One! Two! NO! Kane gets a shoulder up!

Pamela: Our first Extreme match in the new set and it's mainly been on the conveyor belt aisle! Wow!

Kanyon: Alex is dragging Kane to the stage area now... SWINGING NECKBREAKER!!! ONE! TWO! N--HEY!!! WAIT A SECOND!!! THE RIGHT'S BACK!!! SLEDGEHAMMER TO ALEX'S BACK!! Kane's up... OH, AND THE RIGHT WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER TO HIS HEAD!!!! My God!! And... all because this guy hates non-human wrestlers!! And the worst part of this is that this is all LEGAL!! Oh, wait... oh no! Christina's running to Kane! The Right-- oh, he almost swung that hammer at her! He's backing off though. Guess since she's human she's off the hook! Wait... Alex is crawling over to Kane! He's got a hand on the chest and Ayane's counting! ONE! TWO! TH--CHRISTINA JUST PUSHED HIM OFF!! Alex is still too weak though to react... Kane's up! He's pretty rattled from that hammer shot from the Right though... and Alex-- UNEXPECTED EXPLOSION FROM OUTTA NOWHERE!! COVER! ONE! TWO! THR--NO! CHRISTINA PULLS HIM OFF AGAIN!! Alex is getting a little ticked off with her... he... wait, he just grabbed her!! He's not gonna-- No, he just shoves her away! KANE'S UP AGAIN!! HE GRABS HIM!! POWERDRIVER!! HE-- NO!!! NAGOL COUNTERS!! MODIFIED UNEXPECTED EXPLOSION!! COVER! ONE! TWO! THREE!! THE UNDEFEATED STREAK CONTINUES!!!

Pamela: Yeah, but still, the Right's made his point...

Winner: Alexander Nagol

Kanyon: WAIT!!! THE RIGHT'S BACK AGAIN!! STO ON ALEX!!! AND... LOOKS LIKE A REAR NAKED CHOKE!! HE'S CHOKING HIM OUT!! AYANE IS GRABBING THE RIGHT, TRYING TO GET HIM OFF OF ALEX! The Right pulls off of him and-- NO!!! CLOTHESLINE TO AYANE!!! SHE'S OUT COLD!!! CHRISTINA'S RUNNING TOWARDS KANE AND-- NO!! THE RIGHT'S GOT HER BY THE HAIR!! WHAT'S HE-- WAIT WAIT WAIT! NOO!! HIGH ANGLE BACK DROP!!! CHRISTINA LANDED ON THE BACK OF HER HEAD AND... THE RIGHT'S THE ONLY ONE STANDING!!

The Right looks to the downed bodies, then throws his hands up in victory as the crowd boos and "N.W.O." by Ministry cues up.

Kanyon: Not exactly the perfect way to start Riot Rulz, but the Right's more than made his point clear! In his view! Being a non-human sucks!!

Pamela: Just another stupid mutant-hating idiot, in my mind...

Kanyon: Don't go away, we'll be right back!!

***

COMMERCIAL! COMMERCIAL! WE LOVE YOU! COMMERCIAL! YOU LAST 30 SECONDS TODAY!!!

***

Kanyon: The night isn't over yet, because up next is Extreme match between Scarlet Foxfire and the crazed-David Flair.

Pamela: He might not be entirely crazy... maybe just a little touched in the head.

With that, "Also Sprach Zarathustra" cues up, as David Flair comes down to the ring, carrying all types of extreme "goodies". Flair rolls into the ring, just as the dance music from Iczelion hits, bringing out Scarlet Foxfire to a big pop from the crowd.

Kanyon: One half of Wildpack 2000, is Foxfire as she prepares to do battle with Flair. Scarlet steps into the ring, and stretches getting ready for her match.

*ding, ding, ding*

Pamela: You wouldn't think Scarlet would be ready for the change to the Extreme-style in the match, but she's still out here competing. Although, my money is still on Flair...

Kanyon: Oh well--this match is off, and David is already looking to go extreme. Flair with the chair in hand, with Foxfire asking him to bring it on--Flair swings, but Scarlet ducks. Another swing, and Flair is met with another duck. David quickly ditches the chair, and hits Scarlet with a dropkick, who was looking for another swing with the chair. Flair picks the chair back up, and drives it into Scarlet's legs. With this physchology, Flair is trying to set up Scarlet for his new Figure Four-Anklelock combo. But, Scarlet hits a sweep from the ground, making Flair hit the mat, and Foxfire quickly hits a standing senton splash!

Pamela: Very impressive from the furry, but doesn't count, because Flair is going to win! Believe it, it Dogg! See?! Right there, was a very nice blow to the lower midsection to Foxfire. She doesn't have a chance, now!

Kanyon: Well, if that's what you call a balant low-blow, then be my guest. Flair whips Scarlet into the corner, and follows in with a hard clothesline! Flair whips her into the opposite corner, runs in--monkey flip.. countered by Foxfire! She positions him on the top turnbuckle, and a DDT off the top rope! Scarlet with a pin attempt!

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Kanyon: Kickout! Flair got out of that one, but I don't know about this one.. Foxfire has that steel chair, and she's cracking Flair over and over again on his back! Scarlet puts down the chair, and sends fires David into the corner with an Irish whip--Flair flips over the turnbuckle! Class Ric Flair, right there, folks. David is wobbly on the apron, but Scarlet has that clair... she's about to "skateboard" that chair right into Flair's face, but David ducks! Scarlet goes flying on the outside!! Did you see how high she was in the air?! She could be seriously hurt...but she's still trying to fight to her feet. She finally gets there, but David Flair is going for a springboard Asai moonsault!

Pamela: You go, David! WHOOOO--oh my--

Kanyon: ... My God! That counter! Scarlet Foxfire countered it, but in a viscious way!

The instant replay shows David flying through the air, but Scarlet grabbing the nearby chair, and with David in the air using his momentum, brutalizing him with a shot right to the head with the chair.

Kanyon: I think David did like two flips in the air! Plus, he's doing a .3 Muta. He might have a concussion.. be in a coma after than shot! I mean I've heard of self-defense for Scarlet, but that was just... surely, she didn't mean to cause that much damage. David did request this Extreme Match, but I didn't think he meant it to get this violent!

Pamela: I know what you mean, Dogg. Scarlet now rolling David into the ring, and then she goes under the ring to bring out... TABLES?! How viscious can she be?!

Kanyon: David requested it--so, I guess he's asked for it. Scarlet carefully places three tables into the ring, and she then enters back in. Scarlet whips David into the ropes, and gives him a back body drop on the return! Now, she's setting up one of the tables in the middle of ring, and puts David Flair on it. Scarlet quickly rolls out the ring, and she pulls out ladder on the outside. Scarlet's scaling the ladder backwards.. but David Flair is up! He grabs a crowbar that was in his weapons, and springboards onto the ladder!! That ladder just shook violently, but it's still hasn't fell over yet.

Pamela: David just rammed that crowbar into the back of Foxfire, who is on the top of that ladder--now David is too! David is using that crowbar to choke Scarlet... Flair looks back to the ring to that table.. wait... wait...

Kanyon: NOOOO! David Flair just Russian Leg Swept, Scarlet off the top of the ladder on the outside to the inside of the ring through a table with him using the crowbar to Russian Leg Sweep her!

Chants of "E-A-Dubbya, E-A-Dubbya, E-A-Dubbya!" fills the packed Complex.

Kanyon: Scarlet's throat could be severly damaged.. but Flair is able to drape an arm across her!

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Pamela: THREE! DAVID WINS!

Kanyon: NO! Scarlet SOMEHOW got out! David is now setting up the other table--and he places Foxfire on it! Foxfire rolls off, though...and, hits a low-blow of her own to David who was turned around! Scarlet throws David on the table, now.. Scarlet goes to the top.. MOONSAULT THROUGH THE TABLE! COVER!

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Kanyon: Thr--!

Pamela: NO! NO! NO! David kicked out! He IS extreme!

Kanyon: I don't know how the kid did it, but he did, but Scarlet is still on the offense. Scarlet picks up Flair going for Fisherman's Suplex, but David reverses it into a Reverse Suplex! David goes to the outside, and get's the announcer's chair. We all know what happened to David the last time there was a chair involved... and I don't know how he can see with all that blood flowing down his face. David gets back to the ring, and--he's crashing that chair into Foxfire's skull! Maybe some payback from earlier. David drops that chair right in the middle of the ring.. and he hooks Scarlet up for a DDT--

David: E-A-FUCKING-W!

Kanyon: DDT right on the steel chair! Wait, he's locking on the Figure Four Leg Lock.. trying to get the ankle-lock on.. he can't... WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! Scarlet rolled through.. she locks on.. YES! THE 10-57! THE 10-57! Right in the middle of the ring! Can David hold out?! NO! He can't.. David taps! Scarlet wins!

Pamela: DAMNIT! I had money on that match!

The dance music from Iczelion cues up, as the ref picks up Scarlet's arm, as she still lay on the ground.

Winner of match by submission >>> Scarlet Foxfire

Note to Adam: LOOK WHO THE COMMENTATORS ARE first! I had to change all the "Road Dogg" 's to "Kanyon" 's. :P

**Commercial Break**

The bWo theme cues up as we come back from break...

Kanyon: Welcome back, everabuddy!! We're back and about to see the EAW Tag Titles up for grabs--old vets challenging a team that hasn't been around long.

"The following match is for the EAW Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, being accompanied by Jasmin St. Clair, at a combined weight of 472 lbs--Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie--the BLUE WORLD ORDER!!"

Pamela: Yeah, former champs the bWo vs. Michael Connelly--goody-two-shoes extraordinaire--and Lance Storm--who has the nerve to think he's worthy of even getting a shot AT a title shot versus our new World Champ, perhaps our greatest World Champ...one that DESERVES his belt, MAIKU!!

Kanyon: Ah, will you get over it. He hasn't even DEFENDED it yet!

Pamela: Well, the fact remains, that MAIKU is courageously coming out here, even not in the best condition, and wrestling. However, even in his state, the mere thought of Lance in the same match with him after competing in a tag match is adsurd.

Kanyon: Well, not really one to agree with you, but Lance probably did bite off a bit much...

"Oh Canada" then cues up...Lance Storm then steps out onto the stage. "There's a Fire in the House" starts up quickly, and "Code Red" Michael Connelly then walks out onto the stage.

"And their opponents...at a combined weight of 467 lbs, the reigning and defending EAW Tag Team Champions!!--Lance Storm and 'Code Red' Michael Connelly!!"

Kanyon: Mikey and Lance lookin' in fine form--same for the bWo. Strength, speed, style, and experience are all going to be big factors...

Pamela: Not to forget wind speed, velocity, and the amount of silicon in Jasmin's tits.

*ding, ding*

Stevie gets inside the ring first, and Michael does as well for his time. The two lock lock up, and Stevie slings Michael to the ropes. Michael avoids a clothesline from Stevie, and hits the far ropes...he leaps over Stevie and attempts a sunset flip--but Stevie rolls Michael forward, pinning his shoulders down to the mat!

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One!

Kickout!

Connelly kicks out and gets himself back up to a vertical position...Stevie puts him in a headlock--Connelly elbows out of it, and sends Richards to the ropes this time, and catches him with a powerslam off the ropes! Connelly gets up, and pulls up Richards, setting him up for a suple--but finds it reversed into a snap suplex by Richards. Connelly gets up--Headlock Takedown by Richards! Richards then pulls him up, and backdrops him in the center of the ring, and does a cocky dance, before going for a standing moonsault on Connelly--Connelly shoves him off him easily. Richards then pulls him up, but Connelly headbutts him in the stomach, and sets him up for (and executes) a huge belly to belly suplex on Richards.

Connelly gets up and yanks up Richards, and goes for a reverse neckbreaker--Richards slips free of it--German Suplex--with a bridge!

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ONE!

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TWO!--Kickout!

Richards gets up, and goes for a Fisherman's Suplex--Michael blocks it, however, and counters with a T-Bone suplex!! He then crawls towards his corner--tags to Lance!!

Storm quickly climbs between the ropes, and as Richards gets back up, he nails him dead-on with a thrust kick! He goes for a cover

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ONE!

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TWO--but Richards is still too fresh. Storm rolls off, kippups, and pulls up Richards by the back of his torn jean-shorts, and dropkicks him in the back of the leg, then pulls him by the hair up, and snapmares him over, wrenching on a chinlock. Richards fights his way up, but Lance grounds him again. Richards bridges up--counters with a jawbreaker!! He then tosses Lance to the near ropes, and drop toe holds him. Storm quickly fights up, but the two begin brawling, and Meanie is able to grab Storm from behind. Richards returns the favor to Lance by nailing a Steviekick of his own!!

Richards tags to Meanie, who immediately hooks the leg...getting a

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ONE!

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T--kickout!

The fresh Meanie goes for an Irish Whip as he pulls up Storm...Storm reverses, putting a knee into the midsection of the Meanie. He then rams Meanie's head into the turnbuckle, and lays in some boots to the midsection. He then nails a sliding dropkick into the knees of Meanie--Meanie goes down clutching one knee. Storm then pulls him up by that leg--Meanie Enzui Giri's Storm--then seems to have no problem with that knee...

He goes for an armwringer on Lance...Lance reverses into one of his own--but Meanie counters with a headbutt, then doubles over Storm, taking him over with a Butterfly Suplex. Then, standing at his head, he sets up for the People's Legdrop!! He mocks Rock's arm motion then "hulks up." He goes for the far ropes...hops over--hits the opposite ropes--BUT LANCE ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY--legdrop misses!!

Storm pulls himself up, and he throws rights at the Meanie who gets up slowly after him. He then dropkicks him in the face, and grabs the ankle of Meanie, and begins to go for the half crab...Meanie struggles for the ropes, and makes it before Storm can position him correctly. Meanie gets up, and locks on another hammerlock--whipping him face first into the foot of Richards, then gutwrench suplexes him over. Tag is made to Richards, and Meanie scoop-slams Storm, and Richards springs over the top rope, and drops a pair of elbows to Storm. The bWo pull him up, and hit a double suplex--Richards covers as Meanie goes out to the apron--

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Kickout!

Richards stands up, and Storm quickly is up to one knee--and hits Richards in the midsection, fighting back up to his feet. Richards knees Storm in the stomach, and goes for another--Storm catches it, and trips up Richard's other leg. He drops a pair of elbows to the inner leg, and yanks Richards back up. Richards appears to be going for an Enzui Giri, but Storm spins him around, and grabs him from behind--Richards blocks the suplex attempt, and goes for a backslide--unsuccessfully. Storm attempts a Northern Lights--Richards counters with a DDT!! Richards covers!

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TWO!

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Kickout!! Richards gets up, and--Storm with a small package--

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Kickout!

Storm dives for his corner, and tags in Michael. Michael springs up and goes for a clothesline on Richards--catches him on the way up. Michael and Lance high five, and pull up Richards. Richards is tossed to the ropes, and Storm and Connelly hit the Rn'R Express' patented Double Dropkick, and Storm front suplexes Connelly on top of Richards!

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One!

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TWO!

--SHOULDER UP!

Connelly gets up to his feet, and fires Richards into the corner. He lays in kicks to the midsection, and a spinning back kick. Richards staggers out of the corner, and Connelly sets him up for the CRIMSON CRUNCH CLUTCH!!

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TWO!

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Kickout!

Connelly back up...arm drags Richards over...Richards springs up--arm drags Connelly over. Both of them up--double short arm clotheslines! They get groggily...Connelly fires Richards into the ropes--spinning heel--CAUGHT by Richards--he slams Connelly's knee into the mat, and locks on an STF!! Connelly gets to the ropes (still being fresh), but Richards then springs off the near ropes, and hits a flying back elbow to the jaw of Connelly as he gets back up. Richards goes for a piledriver--Connelly backdrops Richards--hits the ropes--Richards monkey flips Connelly over--Richards up--kick to the midsection of Connelly--off the ropes--swinging neckbreaker!!

Richards covers Connelly--

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TWO!

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Kickout!

Richards pulls up Connelly--hits the double underhook faceslam, then rolls him over, and nails 10 mounted punches, pulls him up by the hair, and goes for another neckbreaker--but Connelly counters with a neckbreaker of his own!!

Connelly comes back to life, and pulls up Richards--knees him in the forehead, and snapmares him over, then pulls him up--hits a full nelson slam!! He sets him up for the Crimson Tide--Richards maneuvers out of the set up--suplexes Connelly over. Connelly gets up to his feet--Irish Whip--Richards catches himself in the corner--back heel kick off the second rope to the chest of Connelly!! He then springs up to the top rope--MOONSAULT off the top!! Right on target--

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TWO!

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NOOO!!

Richards tags in Meanie...They hit a double backbreaker, then hit a double elbow drop. Meanie goes for the cover--saved by the ropes. Meanie then snap suplexes Connelly...then again...the next time--Connelly blocks...hits an inverted atomic drop!! Meanie up...Connelly hits the ropes--HITS THE SPEAR!! Makes the tag to Storm!! Storm with a springboard Dropkick--connects!! Meanie knocked down and for a loop with that one. Storm pulls him up, tosses him through the ropes to the outside. Meanie quickly up, but Lance off the apron with an axehandle smash. Meanie is dropped onto the safety railing with a kneebreaker, then crotched on the steel. Lance gets up on the apron, springs off with a back heel kick that sends Meanie into the crowd!

Lance leaps the railing, and Meanie meets him halfway, slugging him in the face with elbows, and tossing him back into the ringside area.

The referee is up to a 6 count...

Meanie rolls Storm back up--Storm up quickly--headbutts Meanie into the midsection--goes for a sunset flip powerbomb--HITS it!! Meanie dropped on the outside back-first. Storm rolls back in, and prepares for a plancha. Meanie gets on his hands and knees--Storm over--MEANIE ROLLS TO THE SIDE holding the mats--Storm hits the concrete floor with little else but electrical cords to break the fall!

Meanie picks up Storm, and drops him stomach-first onto the steel steps and rolls him in..

Kanyon: Meanie setting up Lance...going for the Meanie Bomb!!

Just then, from under the ring, DONNIE B jumps in!!

Kanyon: Meanie hoisting up Lance--Lance slips free--

*WHAM!!*

Kanyon: And a leaping chairshot from Donnie B to Lance Storm!!

Pamela: He's back, Chris! He's back!!

*ding, ding*

Kanyon: I know he's back...and he just ended a good match--presumably to attack Blue Boy--but he failed!--and hit Lance Storm!

Pamela: Well, the referee just explained the situation to the Blue Meanie...and Meanie taking off after Donnie B!!

Kanyon: Stevie and Michael checking on Lance, who was cracked right in the back of the head from that shot with the chair...and that isn't good for someone who is going to be in a SECOND match later tonight.

Pamela: Awwwwwwww, what a shame. But MAIK--MICHAEL WHITE, rather, WISHES that he had that kind of problem. Well, he doesn't wish he was Lance Storm--I'd suck to be Lance Storm.

Kanyon: Well, Lance Storm isn't World Champion.

Pamela: Thank God for that. He's the blackhole of charisma.

Kanyon: Well, at least Lance will have a short rest, cuz up next will be Akiko Nakano and Hokuto Lyger, oneonone! But afta that--Main Event time!

Pamela: Well, after more commercials...

**Commercial Break**

[Ready in 5... 4... 3...]

Kanyon: Lemme be th' first t' say this... I gotta agree with the boosman... puttin' two HAWT asian gals inna ring against each otha... PURE GENIUS!

Pamela: Let me be the first, and hopefully not the last, to say that that comment's rather sexist and downright unbecoming of an EAW announcer!

Kanyon: Uh-huh. An' I betcha you'd just droll all ova a pair o' guys if they were hot enough, wouldn't ya?

Pamela: ... well, that's none of your business!

Kanyon: ... or, as my good friend Rocky would put it... d'you like the pie? Hehheh...

Pamela: I am going to hurt you after this show ends, Kanyon!

Kanyon: Hey, I'm inta a little pain, too... as long as you use the hot wax on me, baby... and bring your pie with ya.

Pamela: ...

"Ride On Shooting Star" by The Pillows fires up, and the crowd ROARS as Akiko runs down to the ring, slides under the ropes and flips to her feet. Oseiko's nowhere to be seen, but it doesn't really matter... she's getting the same kind of HUGE pop.

Kanyon: And there's lovely Japanese lady numba uno! Akiko Nakano! I'm tellin' ya, Oseiko and her've found their niche! They even cheat as well as they Hardyz!

Pamela: ... am I supposed to agree with that?

Kanyon: Nod an' smile, Pammie! Nod an' smile!

"Ride On" segues into KMFDM's "Apathy", and one very different-looking Hokuto stands at the entrance, a hand on her hip for a moment before she purposefully walks down to the ring... steps inside... and bows to Akiko.

Pamela: Akiko looks a bit confused... but returns the bow--and Hokuto locks in a reverse cross armbreaker out of NOWHERE! Beautiful!

Kanyon: 'ey, what's up wit dat?

So I just KILLED A MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

**Commercial Break**

"Down Poison" by 3 Doors Down cues up as we come back from break...

Kanyon: Welcome back, ev'rabuddy!! Up next is our long-awaited main event!!

Pamela: And first out here--it's the jobber that has no chance in hell of winning this!!

Kanyon: Well, we already know what a Da Pac fan you are...

Pamela: Well, I'm a Rash fan, for one...

Kanyon: Even if he and his manager couldn't fight fair if their lives depended on it?

Pamela: Well, if they HAD to fight fair in a mathc, I guess they could do that...

Kanyon: BUT, not likely--

"The following match up is a Four Way Elimination Match Up...with TV time remaining. Introducing first, currently residing in Los Angeles, California--standing six foot even...and weighing in at 200 pounds....he is a member of Da Pac...Ninja X!!"

Kanyon: Well, I gotta say I got a lot of faith in X...maybe he's not quite ready for the big time yet, but he's not gonna back down.

Ninja X hops onto the apron, and springs over the top rope into the ring.

"Gonna Fly Now (the Rocky Theme)" By Maynard Ferguson then cues up...

Kanyon: Olympic hero? Olympic jackass? Or future prop comic? What IS Kirk Angel?

Pamela: Someone who can't make up his mind whose ass to kiss, that's what he is.

Angel comes bouncing out onto the stage, letting out a loud "WHOOO!!"

"And one of his opponents...from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania in an alternate dimension: he stands 6'2" and weighs in at 220 lbs. He is the reigning PWF Universal Champion--Kirk Angel!

Angel rushes down to the ring, and steps inside..."Gonna Fly Now" fades out...to "Oh, Canada"

Kanyon: Our third participant gonna be out heah next. Lance Storm got issues with Kirk I don't think they eva resolved. That could distract them from the object of da match.

Pamela: Well, Storm could always put Kirk to sleep, using a sleeperhold. Not that the sleeperhold itself would do the job, but it would hold him in place long enough for Lance to give an interview on Kirk.

Kanyon: Ahh...just how is a sweetie like you still single?

Pamela: Because I haven't found a man yet DESERVING of me.

Kanyon: What qualifications you looking for? That he's breathing?

Pamela: Much more narrow than that...but you wouldn't be eligible, Chris...

"And another participant...from Calgary............Alberta, Canada!! He stands 6' even and weighs in at 232 lbs...Lance STORM!!!

Kanyon: I don't know what to think of this guy sometimes...seems like he's really tried to assure us he's trustworthy, but still can't shake this bad feeling about him sometimes. Still, he's a fantastic wrestler--

Pamela: But he could bore Ben Stein.

Kanyon: Maybe if he were some ranting lunatic you'd like him.

Pamela: ANYTHING would be an improvement...

Storm gets inside the ring, staring at Kirk Angel from across the ring...

"SHADOW EXPLOSION" then cues up...

Pamela: ALRIGHT!! FINALLY the REAL part of the show begins!!

Kanyon: ....and YOU talk about Kirk.

MAIK--er, rather, MICHAEL WHITE appears on the entranceway as fireworks explode from the stage. He is easily recognizable as MAIKU without face paint. He has long dark brown hair, and a lean build. His outfit is black--with various white and silver phrases, graffiti style, covering the tights, kneepads, and kick-padded "shooter" boots. Over that he has a black leather trenchcoat and a black shirt, with his name written in stylized 'graffiti' print on the latter. The EAW World Title is over his shoulder.

Kanyon: White back to looking like a normal human being...radder than a Muta rip-off...but no less of an ass and NO MORE of a champion.

Pamela: He showed up for this match, didn't he?!

Kanyon: After being goaded and forced into it...

The crowd boos heavily at Michael.

"And the final participant...from parts unknown...he stands 6 foot even, and weighs 220 lbs. He is the reigning EAW World Heavyweight Champion--Michael White alias MAIKU!!"

White looks surprisingly serious, skulking down to the ring with the title, and gently laying it on the steel steps before getting inside the ring, looking on all sides, aware he's among enemies...

Kanyon: And White looks like he's just been surrounded by pitbulls...or is about to be forced to watch the "Kennel from Hell" match.

Pamela: Well, sorry to steal one of Heyman's lines--but "just because you're paranoid doesn't mean the whole world isn't against you."

"Shadow Explosion" fades out as White removes his jacket and shirt...

*ding,ding*

As can be expected, all three of his opponents attack White right after the bell, backing him to the ropes with rights. They sling him to the opposite ropes, and Angel and X flapjack him up in the air. As he crashes to the mat, Storm hits the ropes--and hits a sliding dropkick into his face, then kippups. Kirk pulls up White by the hair, and uses a basic suplex to take him down. White gets up, and immediately barraged with a series of kicks to his side and back by Ninja X, who then uses a Japanese arm drag on him. Angel and Storm begin stomping him in the midsection, but White fights up--sneaks in a low blow on Angel, then a back kick to the groin of Storm. He smashes their heads togther, and high knees them into the chins. Ninja X rushes White...he ducks under...X hits the opposite ropes--White drop toe holds him--X gets back up--White goes for a face crusher. Hits it, but X partially blocks it. X springs back up, and catches a White clothesline and reverses it into a Fujiwara armbar!!

Angel quickly heads over and applies an anklelock while Storm attempts the Mapleleaf. White refuses to break the hold, and reaches out and GETS the bottom rope! The holds are broken, and White gets back up--catches a charging X with a heel kick to the chin, then throws him outside. Storm and Angel go after White, but White spews mist into their eyes!! Confused, Angel and Storm fight each other blind as White shoves Storm into Angel. White then hits the ropes, and does a...SPACE FLYING TIGER DROP(!!) on Ninja X as he stands up on the outside!

Inside the ring, Storm lands a perfect piledriver on Kirk Angel!

White sends X careening back-first into the steel stairs, and shoves them onto their side. He then scoop-slams X onto it, and climbs up onto the apron, leaping off with a guillotine leg drop!

Lance wipes the mist from his eyes--and is disappointed to see Kirk lying there--but still goes for the cover!

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ONE!

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Tw--kickout!

White pulls up X by the hair, and goes for an Ace Crusher--Ninja X recovers, and suplexes White onto the padding. He then rams the steel stairs into the midsection of White repeatedly. Then goes up top, and leaps off--driving them into him with X's body weight!

Ninja X pulls up White, and cinches him up for a suplex--White hooks his leg on the safety railing (even though a fan tries to push it out), and a dazed White fights X off him, then shoves him into the ringpost head first!! He picks up the steel stairs--X turns around--WHITE smashes his head between the steps and the ring post!!!

White tosses the stairs into the ring, and rolls X into the ring...makes the cover...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Kickout!

Ninja X holds his head, which is trickling blood from that last blow, but White shows no mercy...dropping a knee on it. Storm pulls White off of him, though, and drops him with a reverse DDT!

Kirk and Lance resume their exchange, with Lance hitting a leg sweep on Kirk, then extending the arm, dropping the knee into it, then wrenching it back.

X gets up, and uses the opportunity to climb up to the top rope...hits a Shooting Star Press on White!! He then goes for the cover on White--but Storm lets go of Angel in time to break it up, pulling X up off of him and hitting a side backbreaker. Angel and Storm then fight over the pin on White, but that allows White to get up, and nail a double flying clothesline on both of them, then he pulls up Angel, ramming him face first into the steel stairs he threw into the ring...Storm turns around White, and sends him to the ropes--drop toe holding him onto to the stairs!! Storm then goes for the Mapleleaf again...locking it on tight--but a kick to the back of the head by Ninja X breaks it up. Ninja X pulls Lance off of him, then he sits up on the top rope--nailing a Tornado DDT!! X goes for a cover on Lance...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Kickout!

Storm kicks out, and as X pulls him up, he reverses a suplex into one of his own...pinning him with a Northern Lights Suplex. However, it's too close to the ropes, and is broken up.

Storm pulls up X, and fires him into the nearby corner. White joins him in stomping down X...Angel pulls White around, and takes him over with a belly to belly, getting a

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ONE!

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TWO!!

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Kickout!

Storm setting up X in the corner, though...SETTING UP THE DEEP IMPACT--OFF THE TOP ROPE--CONNECTS!! Storm with the cover...

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ONE!!

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TWO!!!

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THREE!!

Eliminated > Ninja X

White has taken the advantage on Kirk with a series of martial arts kicks, and devasted him the corner with Shoteis. Storm comes from behind and dropkicks him into the back--Angel and White hit head-on. Storm then yanks White by the hair--and rams him into the steel stairs, and snap suplexes him. He pulls him up again, going for another one--but White blocks--Storm answers with a series of knee lifts, then sends White to the ropes--back body dropping him. The recovering Angel charges out of the corner and drops an elbow onto the chest of White, then pulls him up to his feet. Surprisingly, Storm and Angel work together long enough to double-suplex White--although then they fight over the pinfall. White sneaks from behind--nails Storm in the ribs with a series of kicks...the sets him up for--and nails, a BRAINBUSTER--or a modified version of it--then schoolboys Storm...holding the tights...

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ONE!!

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TWO!!!

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THREE!!!

*ding, ding*

Storm complains to the referee..but he didn't see it...

Eliminated > Lance Storm

Storm leaves the ring angrily...

Kanyon: Down to White and Angel. Angel sluggin' away at White--sends him to the ropes...Angel with the OLYMPIC--NO! White slips free--waistlock--GERMAN SUPLEX release! White back up...and lookin' in bad shape...

Pamela: Well, for all the poor guy's been through, of course he does! But he can do it..he can win it all! In the corner...second rope moonsault onto Angel!!

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One!

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TWO!

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NONO--

Kanyon: White up...Angel up as well--double leg takedown by Kirk! Mounting White--no, White rolling on top...trying to bust open Kirk further...but--Kirk shoves him off--rolls him over with a schoolboy!!

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Kickout!!

Pamela: *Whew!* He made it! If he can just stick it out a little longer...

Kanyon: Kirk in control now...setting up White...belly to back--NO!--White reverses--headlock takeover! Angel back up--another by White...pulls him up--Cobra Clutch by White--INTO A SUPLEX!!!

Pamela: INCREDIBLE!! Now, TELL ME that wasn't a fantastic comeback?

Kanyon: I won't...but White rolling over to cover...they may have been all he had--

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Thr---NO!!!! Angel kicking out!!

Pamela: NOW he's pissed...

Kanyon: Yeah...White grabbing the EAW World Title...aw, sh*T!!!...we've seen this happen before.

Pamela: Dozens of times...and it only gets BETTER!!

Kanyon: Angel up--swing--and a miss by da batta!! To the midsection by Angel!!--caught by White!--Angel with the other foot into the midsection--connects!! Angel back up...pulls up White...LOW BLOW by White!! White sends him to the ropes--high leg lariat on target!! Pulls him up yet again--to the ropes--going to go for it onto those steel stairs...ULTRA NOV--NO!--blocked by Angel--OLYMPIC SLAM onto the steel steps--or what's left of them--

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ONE!

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TWO!

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and THREE!! Academic after that Olympic Slam! Kirk Angel has beaten White!!!

*ding, ding*

Pamela: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

"Gonna Fly Now" begins to play...

Kanyon: It was down to the EAW champion and the PWF champion...and--this time at least--the PWF champion won--even though if White had NEVER BROUGHT those steps into the ring...

Pamela: *seeth* Grrrr...Angel will pay for this...

Kanyon: Actually, I think White has to pay Angel--with a title shot!

Winner by Pinfall (and of a title shot of his choice) >>> Kirk Angel

Pamela: Horror of horrors... *sniff*

Kanyon: Well, that's all we have time for tonight heah on EAW Riot Rulz...catch us next week...until then--