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Your hosts are Chris Kanyon and Pamela Paulshock! After the Riot Rulz intro, we open to a jam-packed arena, and scan the crowd for signs. Among them: "WWE: Selling is Optional!", "American Angels: Keeping the American Spirit Alive!", "Michael Connelly Fan Club Member #1!", "MEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOW! =^-^=", "I'm STILL Kenny Rogers!", "David Flair is my Hero!", "The World Has a Creamy Center, Jim!", "Seven Has a Nice Ass!" and the ever popular "WHAT?" sign. Kanyon: Welcome everyone, to EAW Riot Rulz!! Thanks to everyone watching tonight, and bear with us--we had to unfortunately make some changes to the card due to flight problems--however, regardless we've got several hot matches here tonight!! Pamela: And for the first time ever--STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN TEAMS WITH THE LEGEND KILLER DAVID FLAIR!! Kanyon: Calm down, Pammy... however, kicking things off tonight will be one of the android twins in action--Seven taking on newcomer Mike Sanders. Pamela: Ahhh... I remember him back from WCW. Most of the rest I'm trying to blot out from my memory. Kanyon: Heheheh... Some generic stock music starts to play over the speakers, as the crowd is silent at the entrance of one of the people in the first match. Capetta: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a 20-minute time limit. Making his way to the ring, from Atlanta, Georgia. He stands 6'1" tall and weighs in at 230 pounds..."Above Average" Mike Sanders! Kanyon: How about that... High Calibur boy finally makes his way to one of the bigger shows! Pamela: HEY! Sanders is a talented individual. You're just having bitterness because he used to own your ass back in WCW! Kanyon: Maybe you're right... I was afraid that he was going to try and hit on me back then. Pamela: Grr... no respect for REAL talent. Sanders will show you how skilled he is. Kanyon: In all seriousness though, Sanders is in for a tough battle tonight, especially considering his opponent wasn't expecting to face him tonight. "Name of the Game" starts to play next, and the crowd cheers as the young black-haired android makes his way to the ring... looking confused. Capetta: And his opponent, from Detroit, Michigan, standing 5'11" tall and weighing in at 187 pounds... Seven! Pamela: Hey... it's... um, Eighteen's brother, right? Kanyon: Cute Pammy. Seven apparently having an over-active sleeping schedule... it took a bunch of calls from the offices to make him remember that he had a match tonight. Pamela: And it seems to me that he is still thinking that he had to go against Kou tonight. I'm starting to wonder if everything's functioning right in the ol' motherboard for Seven. Kanyon: If it isn't, then Seven is going to have the rougher time in this match tonight. The bell has sounded, and the match is now underway. Seven vs. Mike Sanders Pamela: And Sanders wastes no time in going in right for the first strike! Look at those hard right hands right to the face of Seven. Kanyon: But if you look closely Pam, those right hands are only making Seven agitated... and a hard kick to the gut by Seven. Sanders down onto the mat, and going to the outside of the ring to rest up. Pamela: A very ingenious move by Above Average here, taking the time to rest up before getting back in there with the weaker of the Android Twosome. Kanyon: Seven not about to let him catch his breath though... and just dives right at Sanders like a missile! Sanders is down and out, and Seven tossing him back into the ring. Pamela: Now Kanyon, how can you say that this is a fair move for him to do? Kanyon: Because there's nothing in the rule book against it. Pamela: Bleh. Come on Sanders, get back into the fight! Kanyon: Seven going to make sure that Sanders doesn't get any momentum going... sending the former WCW star into the ropes... hurricanrana attempted... blocked by Sanders, into a powerbomb. Sanders with a cover. One . . TWO . . Kickout early on. Pamela: Hehehe... Sanders showing that when you think he's down and out, he's still ready to fight away at someone. Sanders now grabbing Seven... and getting him into a big headlock. Kanyon: Seven seemingly getting dizzy out in the middle of the ring there, not looking too hot right now as he's locked in that headlock... but look at that! Beautiful modified suplex... and Seven dropped right out of his boots! Pamela: EEP! Come on Sanders, get back up to your feet! Kanyon: Seven getting in close, but Sanders getting a punch to the gut before the android can capitalize. Pamela: And this is where the tide is going to turn into Sanders favor. Sanders may have had some bad luck on High Calibur, but here in the big time, he'll show his skills! Kanyon: Sanders getting Seven set up... and a beautiful German Suplex by Sanders... bridging with the cover. One . . And Seven kicking out... and he doesn't look happy. Pamela: Hey, I wouldn't be happy either if I was being out-classed by... HEY! Kanyon: Seven with a HARD thrust kick right to the face of Sanders! Sanders in the ropes... and all tied up now! Shades of the late Andre the Giant during some of his matches! Pamela: But what the hell is with Seven going after Sanders? If he was any type of a sportsman, he'd let Mike Sanders get out of the ropes before continuing. This is a travesty of justice! Kanyon: Seven is getting Sanders out of the ropes Pamela... so don't have a conniption fit. Pamela: Come on Sanders, fight back... no, not this! Kanyon: Seven's Catch by Seven! Seven going... no, getting up from the cover... what is this about. Pamela: See, I KNEW that not everything was right up in the motherboard for Seven. Kanyon: Your right... he wants to finish it though with something even more dangerous... setting Sanders on the top... SEVEN O'CLOCK SHADOW! Cover... One . . TWO . . THREE! Capetta: Here is your winner... SEVEN! Kanyon: Seven making quick work of Mike Sanders tonight on Sanders' Big Show debut, and it's back to the drawing board for "Above Average". Pamela: He'll bounce back though. Guys like him will always bounce back. Kanyon: Don't go away people, the Riot's just getting started! THIS IS A COMMERCIAL! THIS IS A COMMERCIAL! The camera opens back up... to Seven, looking bloodied and beaten down. Kanyon: We're back... and it seems that someone has decided to take out Seven in the backstage area... and he doesn't look too good. Pamela: Ah well, I think that he got everything that he deserved. What's next? Kanyon: Well, I've been informed by Booker Chris Waters... the brackets for the Championship Shot Tournament have been set! Check them out. The camera shows the brackets as they're set... go here for them: http://www.angelfire.com/ne2/theeawmain/tourney.html Pamela: And word is... the first two matches, to occur on the next show, of the tournament will be: David Flair vs. Savvy... and if he can get to the ring for it, Akiko Nakano vs. Seven! Kanyon: And those should be good matches to say the least. Let's go to the ring for our next match-up! "Bullets" by Creed starts to play, and the crowd seems confused at first, until they see who comes out to that now, and they erupt into cheers. Capetta: The following contest, scheduled for one fall, is for the EAW Cruiserweight Championship! Making her way to the ring is the challenger. From Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, standing 5'7" tall and weighing in at 110 pounds, Erica Angel! Kanyon: And Erica with a new theme as she makes her way to the ring... is this an omen for change? Pamela: I don't know Chris... but I think that Erica is taking this match too lightly. Kanyon: Erica doesn't take ANY matches lightly, Pam. She's now in the ring ready for battle... "Bombshell" by Powerman 5000 starts playing next... and the crowd cheers as well as the other person in the match enters. Capetta: And her opponent, from Memphis, Tennessee. She stands 6' tall and weighs in at 215 pounds... she is the current EAW Cruiserweight Champion... Glenda "Unibomb" Jacobs! Pamela: AAAH! IT'S CHYNA'S TWIN SISTER! Kanyon: PAM! Come on, be nice for once in your life. Pamela: Well, all right. But it will be hard. Kanyon: Glenda entering the ring now... one has to wonder if Glenda's tag partner Sonnette is watching this match right now. Pamela: And who she's rooting for... Glenda because she's her partner, or Erica so Glenda can concentrate on tag action. Kanyon: Even that will be tough with the World Title Shot Tourney coming up. Glenda handing the belt to the ref, and the bell has rung!  TITLE MATCH Erica Angel vs. Glenda "Unibomb" Jacobs (c) Kanyon: Erica going to the center of the ring... and look at this! Sportsmanship early on by Erica... will Glenda accept? Pamela: If she's smart, she'll just clock Erica right into her little jaw.... Kanyon: Glenda's not like that though. A shake of the hands to start this match off... and now these two young lady grapplers are ready to get it on. Pamela: Blah... it should be someone good looking with that title belt... like Kooooouuuuuuu.... Kanyon: Glenda and Erica locking up now, pushing against each other, but Glenda has a BIG advantage in that department... and shoves Erica right into the corner. Pamela: But Glenda not letting anything happen by Erica, going for her patented in-corner elbow... Kanyon: Erica ducking though, and pulls Glenda's feet out from under her, and Glenda's face hitting the bottom turnbuckle. Erica now pulling Glenda up... and slams Glenda right on her face. Pamela: Erica going for an early cover, but Glenda kicking out before the referee can get over to make the count. Kanyon: Erica waiting for Glenda to get up to her feet... attempted Hammer of Justice early on, but Glenda just batting the leg of Erica away, and drops an elbow right into it. Pamela: Perfect plan executed by the Cruiserweight champion, working away at the best weapon in Erica Angel's arsenal. Kanyon: Glenda grabbing the leg of Erica now... and drives the knee right into the mat. Picking it up again... NO! Erica using Glenda holding her leg to kick the champ right in the chest. Pamela: A VERY dangerous move for Erica to do... possibly could have injured Glenda badly with that kick... but Glenda trying to get back in... Kanyon: Drop toe hold catches Glenda off guard though, and the champion lands flat on her face. Erica getting to her feet now... and a standing backflip as Glenda rolls to her back. Cover now... One . . TWO . . Glenda kicks-out with authority. Pamela: You're not going to beat the Cruiserweight champion with a simple move like that, no matter how good you are. Glenda already fighting up to her feet right now, and Erica needs to react quickly. Kanyon: Erica going off the ropes, setting up something... but Glenda just blasts the challenger in the face with a huge boot to the face. And Erica is holding her face in pain now. Pamela: Yeah, when Glenda hits you with her size 28 foot, you're not getting up that fast. Kanyon: Glenda picking Erica up onto her shoulder now... and a hard powerslam. Staying on for the cover... One . . TWO... and a kickout by Erica. Pamela: I'll give the younger Angel credit... she's just as resilient as her brother is in competition. Kanyon: The competitive drive apparently going throughout the family line of the Angels, but Glenda is now trying to stomp that spirit out of Erica. Pamela: Look at the aggressiveness of Glenda Jacobs. Picking up the challenger with ease... and dropping her with the Snake Eyes! Kanyon: Erica down on the mat... and an elbow dropped right into the small of her back now. Glenda with another cover now... One . . TWO... and Erica rolling through with a leg scissors! Erica covering Glenda now... One . . TWO . . NO! Glenda getting out, and she looks stunned. Pamela: I'm stunned myself. I didn't think that Erica had anything left in her arsenal after being used as a doormat like she has been. Kanyon: Glenda getting up to her feet before Erica... going for a lariat... and Erica catching her off guard with an overhead arm-drag! Erica going to the top rope... top rope moonsault... connects! Staying on for a cover! One . . TWO . . And... no! Pamlea: Damn! That was a close call there. I thought for SURE that the match was over. Erica getting up now... and seems to be coiled and ready to strike... Kanyon: Erica going for a dropkick... but Glenda takes a step back and is pushed down to the mat! Glenda quick to cover now... One . . TWO... kickout. Pamela: Wow... back and forth match here. Even *I* don't have anything bad to say about this match right now. Kanyon: Erica starting to get back up, and Glenda seems to be singling for the end... but Erica getting a quick cradle in! One . . TWO... kickout! Pamela: Where is Erica pulling out these quick near-falls? I thought that she would be down and out for good by now. Kanyon: Erica getting a second wind now... Glenda back up to her feet... and beautiful Mexican Suplex! Glenda too close to the ropes for a pinfall attempt afterwards... but that's not stopping this young talent from continuing! Pamela: Erica showing great strength for a girl her size by pulling Glenda from the ropes right into the middle of the ring... and Wishbone Legdrops Glenda! Kanyon: The only way that move could be worse is if Glenda was a guy. Erica waiting now... she tried this earlier but it failed... not this time though! Hammer of Justice by Erica! Pamela: Erica signaling for the Starsault... off the ropes... and she hits... NO! Glenda grabbing Erica right by the throat... and stands up! Kanyon: Glenda picking Erica up... CHOKESLAM... BUT LOOK! Erica hit Glenda in the head with her knee as she was getting chokeslamed. And now both are on the mat Pamela: But the question now is if either combatant can follow up from that exchange... as they both look like they were hit with a Mack truck. Kanyon: Neither combatant seems to be moving right now... and the referee is laying on the count. Pamela: If Glenda was smart, she'd stay on the mat and just let the count go to 10. Kanyon: Glenda is a proud fighter though Pamela... she's got the ropes now to pull herself up... and falls on top of Erica! One . . TWO . . KICKOU! Pamela: Damnit, how in the hell could Erica kick out from that? Kanyon: I don't think Glenda even knows. Glenda signaling now... and here it comes! G-Bomb attempt now... if Glenda hits this... Pamela: Look at Erica though, she's wiggling around... and a roll up... she's got her up tight in that pin! Kanyon: The ref with the count! One . . TWO . . THREE! Capetta: Here is your winner... and NEW EAW Cruiserweight Champion... Erica Angel! Kanyon: An unbelievable back and forth contest there, but in the end, a quick move by Erica got her the victory and the title. Pamela: But Glenda looking non-too-pleased about that outcome... she just yanked that Cruiserweight championship out of the hands of the referee... Kanyon: Oh no... Glenda looking at Erica... now the title belt... Pamela: CLOCK HER WITH IT! NOOO! Kanyon: And Glenda handing the belt to the new champion as "Don't Tread On Me" plays! Erica has the blessing of the former Cruiserweight Champion as she becomes the new Cruiserweight Champion! Pamela: Oh poo. Everyone would have rather seen these two continue to fight post match. Kanyon: Well, maybe you would anyway. Folks, don't go away! More after this! **MORE COMMERCIALS! AAAAUUUUGHH** As we come back from commercials, we find, in the back, Michael Cole nervously standing next to Nexus. Nexus is just glancing around with some sunglasses on, a satisfied, yet sadistic smirk on his face. "Michael Cole here with Nexus Do...." Nexus shoots him a glare. "... Nexus. Now, you had a match, but both got changed, right?" "That's right, little Stone Cole. First I was gonna fight my old man. But he pussied out. Then that Kou guy, who I gotta give points for style, but he couldn't. You'd think he'd wanna defend his girl. But, he's got two now." Nexus chuckles. "Just seems no-one wants a piece of me." Cole sighs. "Well, what about what you did to Akiko." "What about it. I just met her at a club. I gave her mushrooms. She was such a drugged out bitch, she took them willingly herself." "What about your attempted rape?" "Cole, Cole, Cole. Do you accept that the definition of rape is sexual activity, unwanted and forced?" Cole just nods a bit. "Well, if you watch that footage, then you'd see that Akiko wasn't fighting at all." Cole sighs. "She was under the influence of hallucinogens." "Bah, she's the one that took them. And those drugs only open you up and throw away your inhibitions, meaning it proves that she's a total slut under it all. You know... He would probably like her for an addition." He shrugs. "Who knows... she's certainly got the makings of it..." Suddenly, a shape drops on Nexus from above. Cole yeeps and runs off. The shape is Pogo-chan! She's got an aluminum bat and she smacks him on the head... and he howls in inhuman pain. In a closer look, we see that the bat is coated in silver! Nexus lashes around and tries to slice her with his claws but she whacks him again and he falls screaming. She begins to beat him on the head, shoulders and back, like she was turning in Joe Pesci in Goodfellas. He's growling and laying in pain, slowly getting up. She draws out her sickle and we see that it's tipped in silver as well. She begins to slash and stab him with it. Each hit has him screaming, his blood beginning to pool on the floor. She then pulls out... vodka. Taking a swig, lighting a match, and breathing... she sets him on fire. His fur goes up like a dry leaf and limping, bleeding and in pain, he begins to flop around, to put it out. She steps back and leaves, with Nexus smoking and horrible looking in the middle of the hall. Back at ringside... Pam and Kanyon are in a state of shock. Pam's kinda hiding her eyes. Kanyon: My God.... Pam: ... even if he WAS as twisted as he seemed that was uncalled for... Kanyon: ... lets... move on, OK? "All Over Me" by Drowning pool cues up and Frosti makes her way to the ring. She's greeted by boos and just glares around looking tough and ready for action. Capetta: The following match is scheduled for One-Fall! Making her way to the ring, from Las Angeles, weighing in at 133 lbs., Frosti! Pam: Go Frosti! Kanyon: Frosti definitely looking good and stepping up the regiment since her falling out with her sister. She wants to make a name for herself. Perhaps not so far off base from another extreme team, of WWE... Pam: Let's not bring them into this. But you're right. Frosti's ready to show that she has what Savvy didn't. We're looking at the superior sister. "Gonna Fly Now" cues and Kirk Angel now comes out. He heads down the ramp with a big smile on his face, the crowd roaring. He stops and puts his arms out, signaling his fireworks. He makes the rest of the way down to the ring now. The crowd chants "U-S-A! U-S-A!" Capetta: And her opponent, from Pittsburgh, PA, weighing in at 220 lbs., Kirk Angel! Pam: Something I've never understood. How can fans chant USA when the match is between two Americans? Kanyon: Well, usually, especially in this case, the chants more for the pride and nobility of a person, and not just nationality. Pam: Ah, Frosti's just as patriotic as Kirk. Heck, her hair's a third of our colors. ^__^ Kanyon: ... right... Frosti vs. Kirk Angel The two tie up. This proves to be a mistake on Frosti's part as Kirk wrestlers her down to the ground and puts her in a sort of half nelson lock. He knees her while holding her and lets go, up to his feet and stomping her to the mat. She manages to grab his feet and trips him down. She holds his foot and seems to be trying for an Ankle Lock right away, but he knows the move well and easily spins around to his back and kicks her away. She falls backward into the ropes and he kickups to his feet. He rushes forward and clotheslines her down. He throws his arms out celebratory as part of the clothesline in a way and reaches down to pick her up, but once on her knees, she splits the uprights. Kirk grabs himself and falls over. She begins to kick and stop at him and backs up. When he stands, she rushes him with a Gore! She grabs him by the head and with her other hand punches him in the head, trying to keep this a brawl and not a technical match. Dragging him up to his feet, she gives him a Full Nelson Driver. She drags him to just the right spot and goes up top, leaping off with a Shooting Star Press-- But he gets his knees up and she lands gut first on them, launching off, holding her gut in pain. He slowly gets up, that obviously being a desperation move after the Driver. He grabs her by the hair and lays in a few punches and kick to her now injured torso. He pulls her up and gives her a side suplex. He follows her and grabs her in a front facelock and drops, driving her to the ground in it. He pulls her back up and shortarm clotheslines her, but she ducks under it, reversing and whipping him to the ropes. When he comes back, she grabs him in a Spinebuster. She grabs his legs and applies an Elevated Crab. He cries out in pain and reaches for the ropes. She digs her knee in his back and pulls back hard. He puts his hand back down and then tries grabbing again and manages to grab the rope with a finger. She grudgingly lets go and kicks his thigh hard. He grabs it and uses the ropes to stand up. She then Thrust Kicks him and knocks him over the top rope to the outside. She runs at the ropes and does a no-hand springboard of the top into a Swanton Bomb! It hits Kirk and also slams her into the barrier. The two of them lay in a heap of carnage as the crowd begins a "Holy Shit!" chant. The ref begins to count off to 10. They don't even begin to stir until 5. By 8, Kirk's still getting up and Frosti's at the apron. She rolls in and right back out, restarting the ref's counts. She takes Kirk by the head and gets him up, leading him to the ring corner, smashing him headfirst into it. She then repeats the process with the steps. She goes for another when her grabs her around the waist and picks her up in a slight belly to back suplex which hits her head and folds her up on the barrier. The refs back to about 6 and Kirk rolls her into the ring and follows. She staggers to her feet and he shoves her head in between his legs and hoists her up for a powerbomb, but she begins to hit him in the head while up there and then pushes off from his shoulders, grabbing his head as she falls and hits a DDT. He bounces hard and holds his head, kicking his feet a bit in pain. She staggers to her feet and glares at the audience before reaching down and lifting him up. She centers herself to get his large frame just right and lifts him into a fireman's carry. She's about to do the FrostBite.... when He wiggles free and behind her! He lands to his feet and grabs her around the waist for a beautiful German Suplex... but he's not letting go as he gives her another... and another... and then a forth, releasing her. She lands on her belly. He then grabs her foot, and stares tot he crowd. HE locks in the ankle lock and drags her to the center of the ring. She screams out, reaching for a rope that's 3 feet away. He's got a solid base and she can't crawl anywhere. He just "WHOOO!!"s, and the crowd responds in kind until Frosti finally taps. "Gonna Fly Now" cues up and Angel lets go, throwing his arms out and spinning in celebration. Frosti rolls out and backs up the ramp, none to pleased, even as Angel holds his hand out, wanting her to come back and shake hands, but he finally just shrugs and continues to celebrate. Kanyon: What an Awesome match! Frosti deserves major props, even if he won! Pam: Ah! She deserves the WIN! She had it but his big bulky form slipped out of her hold. Kanyon: Whatevah. =0p Folks... woah, look at this! Pamela: What's SHE doing here? Kanyon: Frosti's sister Savvy just came out of NOWHERE... AND PHOENIX ARROW ON FROSTI! Pamela: That's not fair! Get her out of there! Kanyon: She's leaning over now... and the red mist right into the face of her sis! Folks, join us after this commercial break for the rest of our great show! Don't touch that dial! ********Commercials******** STAND BACK! "Dare" by Stan Bush cues up, as the crowd goes wild. Kanyon: Welcome back to Riot Rulz, for tonight's main event!! And yet again, we're going to see the World Champion team up with the Hurricane! Although there's mutual trust in respect, ultimately the Hurricane wants another shot at the title--and to succeed when he gets it. Pamela: Hardly can blame him for that... although he should be a little more ruthless and agressive. That's what he needs--ruthle-- Kanyon: ENOUGH! >_< Capetta: The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall with TV time remaining. Introducing first... from Raleigh, North Carolina... standing 6 '0" and weighing in at 210 pounds--The Hurricane!! Hurricane comes out to a loud reaction as he poses on the stage, whipping his cape around him, then taking is off... "Broken" by Bruce Dickinson plays... Capetta: And his partner, from Mars, Pennsylvania... standing 6'2" and weighing in at 235 pounds... the EAW World Heavyweight Champion--"Code Red" Michael Connelly!! Connelly meets up and shakes hands with Hurricane on the stage. Kanyon: A show of sportsmanship and trust here, and Connelly and Hurricane heading to the ring. And clearly they've got themselves together, but I don't know how well Flair and Austin will work... Pamela: Well, with Kelly's guidance, hopefully they've been honed into a good team. If not, it isn't a problem with talent to be sure. Kanyon: I'd say you're half right, because the problem would be trust between the two. "Superstar" by Saliva plays... Capetta: And their opponents... introducing first, from Minneapolis, Minnesota... standing 6'2" and weighing in at 210 pounds... accompanied by Kelly Connelly-Flair--"The Legend Killer" David... FLAAAAAIR!! David comes out to massive boos... Kelly and him confer as he ignores them. Capetta: And hiiis partner! *KRAAAA-AAAASH!* "Glass Shatters" by Disturbed cues up next, and the crowd again goes wild. A few boo, but they're a minority in the crowd. Capetta: From Victoria, Texas... standing 6'2" and weighing in at 241 pounds... STONE COLD... STEVE... AUUUUUSTIN!! Austin walks down, right past Flair and Kelly, and into the ring. He goes to all four corners, holding up his arms to the roaring crowd. Kanyon: Austin practically ignoring his partner completely... and already a rift showing here. Pamela: Grrr... come on, get it together, guys! Kanyon: It seems David convincing Austin to let him go first... Hurricane looking to start out for his team. And Hurricane and Flair staring each other down... The Hurricane and "Code Red" Michael Connelly vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin and David Flair Kanyon: Tie up in the center of the ring--Hurricane going into the armbar. Locking from behind--wait, reversal and a hammerlock by David--double leg takedown from behind. David going for a front face lock--drives the knee into the side of the head of Hurricane. And now grabbing the ankle--wrenching the leg. Hurricane sliding towards--and gets the rope. Flair breaking it up, and allowing Hurricane to get to his feet--tie up, and HURRICANE with a headbutt catches Flair by surprise--grabbed, and snap suplexed in the center of the ring! Pulls him up, and a side-backbreaker-- . . . ON--kickout! Pamela: David up, Hurricane scooping--wait, reversal--SCOOP AND A SLAM by David! Hurricane up--DROPKICKS him in the back of the legs! Grabbing Hurricane's ankles and DRIVING them into the mat! Waistlock now, and hoisted up--HUNG OUT TO DRY on the TOP ROPE! Kanyon: Hurricane dropped right on the throat, and now going up to the top rope--axhandle coming up--Hurricane shaking the ropes--CROTCHES David on the top rope!! Pamela: NOOOOO!! Kanyon: Hurricane trying to get his wind back--and grabs David--TOSSED right off the top rope and to the mat!! Hurricane up on the top rope--and David up--FLIPPING NECKBREAKER on Flair!! Cover made! . . . ONE! . . . TWO--Kickout! Pamela: COME ON DAVID!! GET THE TAG!! Kanyon: Hurricane pulling up David--DAVID WITH AN INVERTED ATOMIC DROP!! And a BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX by David!! Going for the tag... Austin, however, is facing the other way, and hops off the apron as David is about to tag him. And actually leans over the safety railing, seeming flirting with a woman in the front row. Pamela: Huh?! What ARE you DOING, Austin! Let David tag you! Kanyon: It may be worse than I expected--HURRICANE WITH THE ROLL UP FROM BEHIND!! . . . ONE! . . . TWO!--kickout by Flair! Pamela: Kelly talking with Austin, and seems he's returning to the apron--ah... near-disaster adverted there. Kanyon: Hurricane pulling Flair back up, and executing a BEAUTIFUL spinning neckbreaker there! Tag made to Connelly, and Hurricane with a full nelson on Flair--springboard and a CONNELLY COMET into David Flair!! And cover by Connelly! . . . ONE! . . . TWO! . and the kickout! Pamela: Connelly snapmares Flair--pulls him up by the hair--tosses him on the back of his head on the mat! To the ropes--spring out spla--NO! Flair rolling out of the way. Connelly up--Flair out of the ring. Connelly going after--David trips him up, "1!" Pamela: and now--dragging him over and CROTCHES him on the ringpost!"2" Kanyon: Figure Four set up by Flair--and there it is! "3!" Kanyon: Not a valid submission hold in this match, but certainly is effective... "4!" Pamela: Flair going for Austin to make the tag--Austin tagged in!! Connelly getting out of that unfortunate position--Austin slugging away and catching him, helpless, in the corner. Austin charging in--CLOTHESLINE across the chest! And Austin with a HIPTOSS out of the corner!! Headlock, and Austin wrenching on the neck--back against the ropes--Connelly shoots him off--dropkick--Austin catches himself on the ropes, and it misses. Austin grabs the legs, and now SLINGSHOTS Connelly into the corner!! Kanyon: Hits it face first, and Austin with a BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX!! Cover! . . . ONE! . . . TWO! Kickout! Pamela: Austin picking up Connelly by the hair--BACK BODY DROP counter by Connelly! Getting up--ducks the clothesline by Austin--slings him into the corner--and a Outside Crescent Kick! And TAG made to Hurricane!! Kanyon: Pulling Austin up, and a backslide--LEGDROP FROM THE TOP ROPE by Hurricane onto Austin!! Standing Moonsault by Connelly! And going back out to the outside. Flair looking for the tag--chinlock applied by Hurricane... pick up now, and shoulders rammed by Hurricane--slung into the ropes--grabs the arm--and CROSSFACE HALO by Hurricane!! . . . ONE! . . . Two--Kickout! Pamela: Former WCW/ECW Alliance member against former Alliance leader! And Austin picking him up... suspended high in the air, and dropped in the middle of the ring! Tag made to Flair! Kanyon: David Flair looking a little bit pissed at Austin, but nonetheless getting in the ring. And looks like not even any double teaming here... Flair laying the boots in on Hurricane, and leaping off the second rope--KNEEDROP across the sternum! Picks up Hurricane--whipped towards the corner--the referee moving out of the way--and LOW BLOW snuck in by Flair! Pamela: What? Where? I didn't see it! Kanyon: Yeah, right... and David setting up Hurricane on the turnbuckle... front the top and a GERMAN SUPLEX from the turnbuckle!! Follow up, and a FROG SPLASH by Flair!! . . . ONE! . . . Two! ..no, and the kickout! Flair grabbing the leg... pulls up Hurricane with it--DRAGON SCREW!! Pulls him up again, and anoth--ENZUI GIRI by Hurricane counters!! Hurricane pulling himself up with the ropes--Flair getting up, and a FACE CRUSHER from behind by Hurricane! . . . ONE! . . . TWO! . ..kickout by Flair! Pamela: Nice move there, and Hurricane driving the point of the elbow into the throat. Pulling up Flair, and chop to the chest--back of the neck, and set up for a piledri--Great escape!! Kanyon: That was a LOW BLOW AGAIN by David! And David to the ropes--FLYING CLOTHESLINE on Hurricane! And looking to tag in Austin.. Over at Austin's corner, we hear a MIDI-ized version of Austin's theme (something like "Doo-doo doo-doo-DOO! Dooooo! Doo-doo doo-doo-DOO!"). He hops off the apron and pulls a--cell phone?--from under the ring. And carries on a short conversation, ending with "...Microsoft is down five points? SELL! SELL!" Pamela: Hmph... glad Austin's relaxed, but WHAT IS HE DOING ACTING LIKE A FOOL!! Austin puts it away, and then borrows Pamela's glass of water... Pamela: HEY!! He takes a sip, gargles, spits it out on the ground, and wipes his mouth, setting the glass back down as Flair stomps at Hurricane to try to keep him down. Pamela: *sniff, sniff* EEWWWW... I can't drink this anymore. It stinks of beef jerky and beer now. Kanyon: Heheheh... and Austin getting up on the apron, NOW accepted the tag from Flair! And runs drops a driving elbow across the chest of Hurricane! Pulls him up now, and hits a pendulem back breaker! Hurricane pulled up... shot into the ropes--caught, and Austin hitting a SPINEBUSTER on Hurricane!! . . . ONE! . . . TWO! . . ..NO! Pamela: Hmph... certainly keeping himself fresh, that Austin. Kanyon: Austin sending Hurricane towards the corner... charging in--HURRICANE WITH A FLIPPING DROPKICK catches Austin in the chest!! Up to the top--Austin getting up--and leaps off--and a HURRICANRANA FROM THE TOP ROPE CATCHING AUSTIN!! . . . ONE! . . . TWO!--Kickout! Pamela: Hurricane getting up, and tags in his partner, Connelly! High five, and the two look to be setting up Austin for a backdrop--wait--both grabbing Austin, and a DOUBLE CHOKESLAM from Connelly and Hurricane to Austin!! Connelly going up top... and the MICHAELSAULT on top of Austin!! . . . ONE! . . . TWO! . ..NO! Kanyon: Austin up, and Connelly sends him into the corner--charging in--BACK ELBOW by Austin!! Scoops him up, and a K-DRILLER ON THE EAW World Champion!! Off the ropes, and DRIVING ELBOW to Connelly! Pulls him up by the hair--whipped to the ropes--Connelly grabs hold--CLOTHESLINED IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD BY FLAIR!! Connelly dazed, and Flair DROPS him throat first across the top rope! Pamela: Austin now--kick to the midsection--STUNNER!! STUNNER!! STUNNER!! Cover by Austin!! *slap* Pamela: HUH?! Kanyon: Flair reached in and slapped the leg of Austin and... that's..a legal tag?! Pamela: What?! Kanyon: YES! And Flair quickly in--cover on Connelly!! . . . ONE! . . . TWO! . . . THREE! *ding, ding, ding* Pamela: ....THE EAW World Champion has been pinned by David Flair!! Kanyon: He... yes he has. "Superstar" by Saliva cues up. Capetta: And the winners of this match... by pinfall--Stone Cold Steve Austin, and Daaavid Flair! Kanyon: Ugh... and look at David shamelessly mugging for the cameras--Austin leaving by himself, although Kelly following after--trying to keep them together. Pamela: ... weird. Kanyon: For once we agree... well, thank you for tuning in and see you next time! I'm Chris Kanyon, for Pamela Paulshock, and this has been EAW Riot Rulz! Goodnight!!
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