Live from the Arnprior District Civic Center in Arnprior, Quebec, Canada !!

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Cut to the Armprior District Civic Center, where tonight't event is being held...

Pro-Lance Storm signs are prevalent here, as they have been throughout the Canadian tour...

"Canada...the friendliest, and least racist North American country."

"Eh yo!"

"Fur is IN!"

"Please Baby please Baby please Baby please Baby please!"

We cut to the announcer's desk...where Megan Eko is seated next to...Lilith Aensland.

Lilith: WELCOOooooooooooME, everyone!! She's baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!! Megan's here with us, and I'm glad since she's a LOT more fun than that stuffy JR.

Megan: Uh...thanks, Lilith.

Lilith: So...when's that photo shoot for Playboy coming up?

Megan: Somewhere between "When Hell freezes over" and "When William Regal says something intelligent."

Lilith: Damn...could you get naked again after the show?

Megan: .....

Lilith: That WASN'T a no!

Megan: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO aaaaaand especially NOOOO!

Lilith: I'm horny and persistant, NOT deaf!

Megan: Well, let's get down to business.

Lilith: Yes, let'sgiddowntobidness!!

Megan: The big story of the night, is of course, the main event pitting Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Lance Storm..with the number one contendership being on the line against...Lance's Canadian citizenship.

Lilith: Plus if Lance loses, Triple H and Sonnette get to do whatever they want to him for 10 minutes!

Megan: Not good news for Lance.

Lilith: Well, I'd like to be in that position...well...20 minutes--no, thirty...an HOUR!! SIX HOURS!! A WHOLE EVENING!! INFIIIIIIIIIIIIIINITY!! INFINITY SQUARED...minutes...with Trip and Sonnie. ^_^

Megan: *Ahem* But Lance will likely just be on the recieving end of a ten minute long stomping from that pair.

Lilith: Well, good...cause Lance SUCKS!! And you know why?

Megan: He turned down your advances?

Lilith: Well...yeah...but besides that...HE BURNED ALL THAT SONNETTE PORN!! ALL OF IT!! BURNED!! Laying in a fire as it combusted and was consumed by a greedy porn-starved fire!!

Megan: Uh...well, he wanted to rid himself of it.

Lilith: Yeah, but what a WASTE!! If he wanted to get rid of it, he could have been charitable and given it away to some teenage boys too poor to afford their own porn!!

Megan: Lilith...she cares.

Lilith: Yup....how we gonna kick this shiznit off?

Megan: Well, our opening match pits William Regal against the Right to Cens--

Lilith: BOOO!! BOOO!!

Megan: --or's Dudley Clark II....Esquire.

Lilith: Beat the bloody hell out of the bloke, Willy!!

Megan: Let's take a look backstage where Dudley is with Pamela Paulshock...

Backstage...

Pamela: I'm here with the RTC's Dudley...who will be taking on a rival in William Regal here tonight.

Dudley: Yes, at last I've been granted the match I pretty much came here for. I have a point to prove tonight, miss. That someone like William must be stopped from utterly disgracing my homeland.

Pamela: Well...will the other RTC members interfere?

Dudley: No, no...and for the record, we only do that when it is necessary. I understand the house arrest on Michael's are still in effect...though as you can tell from RTC Man's appearance in Steven's last match, Miss Eighteen is obviously wrong...

Pamela: I don't know...he looked a bit...bigger.

Dudley: TV adds ten pounds.

Pamela: But we always see...

Dudley: Nevermind...heh...it's not even the issue here. The issue is the brutalization that William will recieve tonight....good day...

Back at the announce table...

Lilith: Smug sonnuva...

Megan: *ahem* Well, our first match is set to kick off...

William Regal's theme cues up immediately there after, drawing boos from nearly all present.

"The following match up is scheduled for one fall..and is a Grudge Match. Introducing first....from Blackpool, England...standing 6'2" and weighing in at 245 pounds...William...REGAL!!"

Megan: You are actually going to cheer for him?!

Lilith: Yeah...I mean...it's the RTC! They'd have me killed if they thought they could get away with it.

Megan: Well, they aren't directly--

Lilith: No sex, no Lilith. *gag* I'll croak!! Regal's weird, sick, twisted, perverted and stupid, but he's at least not with those guys.

The crowd boos at William as he makes his way down to the ring.

Megan: It'll be interesting if Dudley can outdo that sort of following...

Lilith: I'll help...

The Right to Censor theme then cues up, drawing perhaps even more boo's than Regal's triggered...Lilith adds to it...

Lilith: GO HOOOOOOOOOOOME!!!

"And his opponent...from London, England....he stands 6'2" and weighs two hundred and thirty eight pounds. He's a member of the Right to Censor...Dudley Clark, II...Esquire!!"

Lilith: This music really sucks, don't it Meg?

Megan: Well...not really even music...but it IS annoying.

Dudley comes out to more boos, but ignores them walking down to the ring in boxing shorts, boots, kneepads, and wristbands...and no gloves.

Lilith: *tsk, tsk* Too bad. Tooooooooo bad. I wouldn't mind getting myself some of that...if he weren't a brainwashed RTC zombie.

Megan: I'm not so sure he's brainwashed...

Lilith: Whatever...GO REGAL GO!!!

*ding, ding*

Megan: They cautiously walk toward each other...lock up center of the ring...hammerlock by Regal--elbow side of the head. Side headlock by Regal...Clark shoves him into the ropes...slings him off!! William hits the ropes...Clark hits the mat...over....William back...haymaker swing by Dudley misses!! Dropkick by Regal connects!! Clark up...armdragged over!! Regal now--floored with a chop from Clark!! Up again...CLARK levels him with a left!! Pulls him up...Regal sent into the corner...charges in...elbow by Regal catches him!! Dudley dazed..Regal has him now...atomic drop!! Dudley down to his knees...Regal nails a knee lift to him as he gets up...rolls him over now...mounted punches!!

Lilith: William delivers a proper British beating!

Megan: Regal has Dudley up..Irish Whip..no, reversal...Clark with a knee to the midsection!! Rights to it now....has Regal by the hair....slams him head first to the buckle!! Again!! Regal slumped in the corner...Dudley laying in the boots....sends him towards the opposite corner...charges in...CLOTHESLINE MISSES!! William sends him to the ropes...DUCK--EUROPEAN UPPERCUT!! Dudley surprised but back up...scoop slam by Regal!! Cover!

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One!

Kickout!

Lilith: Come on, show us something more interesting than that, Regal!

Megan: Dudley pulled up..chops to the chest from William...arm wringer again...yanking down on the elbow...again! Armbar applied by William! Regal going for the submission!!

Lilith: Booooooooooooring! Beat on him some more!!

Megan: Dudley struggling toward the ropes...he gets it!! Regal frustratedly releases the hold...back up to his feet now...laying in some stomps to Dudley.

Lilith: Regal's not that bad a guy...he's just gone through a lot of misunderstandings. Like the misunderstanding when he didn't realize that "Free Willy" was just the in-flight movie.

Megan: No need to bring out THAT skeleton...but none the less...Clark rolls out to the outside!! Grabs the ankle of Regal..yanks him out...the two exchanging lefts and rights...Clark going for an irish whip...reversal...CLARK HITS THE STEEL STEPS!!

Lilith: HOW DARE HE!

Megan: William rolling Dudley in...going for the cover...

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ONE!

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TWO!!

Kickout!

Lilith: YES!! I think Willy's gonna take it!

Megan: If he is, he'll need to keep the pressure on...setting him up for a DDT now...Dudley shoves him off though...headbutts by Dudley....locks both arms...AL SNOW HEADBUTTS!! Ramming his head into the face of Regal!! And....takes him over with a reverse Tiger suplex!!

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One!

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TWO!

NO!!!

Lilith: *whew*

Megan: A useful offensive combination, but not enough to put Regal away...Dudley yanks him back up....right hands!! Right hands!! REGAL ANSWERING WITH RIGHTS OF HIS OWN!! Back and forth now...haymaker swing by Regal--misses!! Dudley locks on a full--MULE KICK BY REGAL!! MULE KICK BY REGAL!! RIGHT BETWEEN THE LEGS!! William hits the ropes now...FLYING CLOTHESLINE!! And the referee missed that low blow completely.

Lilith: I wouldn't be surprised if Lupe just happened to NOT see a move like that in our main event. ^_^

Megan: Highly possib--Regal locking Dudley's arm around his neck...there's that neckbreaker we've seen in the past!! BIG MOVE! Regal going for the pin!

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One!

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TWO!

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Kickout!!

Lilith: DAMN DAMN DAMN!! SO CLOSE!!!

Megan: Regal pulls up Clark...standing dropkick into the chest...Dudley slowly up...Irish--BLOCKED!! Clark whips him around...SLEEPERHOLD!! William struggling to free himself...standing switch...goes for a German Suplex...blocked...Clark switches...sends him to the ropes....Dudley bounces off the ropes...LOU THESZ PRESS!! Clark hits the LOU THESZ PRESS!!! Hammers away a la Austin!! Covers him on the mat!

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One!

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TWO!

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Kickout again by Regal!!

Lilith: *Whew* Close one there. Thinking I'd have to get involved....

Megan: Regal up...Dudley shoves him towards the ropes...hoists him up...TKO COMING UP!!--NO, Regal slides behind Clark!! Sternum first to the turnbuckle!! Schoolboy roll up!!

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One!

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TWO!

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Kickout!!

Lilith: Close one...

Megan: Both them up again....Regal going for a suplex--Clark blocks...set up NOW AND FRONT SUPLEX ACROSS THE ROPES!! Dudley goes up top...axehandle down into the back!! Dudley back in control...sends him into the ropes...tilt-a-whirl...no! Regal lands on his feet...sends Clark to the ropes...tilt-a-whirl...Tombstone Piledriver position!! Back backing up the turnbuckle...second rope!! THE SHROOM!! THE SHROOM!!

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One!

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TWO!

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THREE??!

Lilith: THREE!! THREE!! WHOOOPIEE!!!! The RTC got beat!!

Megan: Wow!! In what MUST be deemed an upset, William Regal gets the win over Dudley Clark, II!

Lilith: ....Esquire.

Megan: Uh yeah.

Winner by Pinfall >>> William Regal

Megan: Be sure to come back after this commercial break! The Minister vs. Rik Felstrom! Extreme rules!

**Commercial Break**

Megan:..well...here we go. Minister Vs. Rik.

Lilith: Minister is so..I don't know..odd.

Megan: Well, speak for yourself.

Lilith: Oh..phht..

*the lights dim as "The Alter" plays on the P.A. and Minister wonders out onto the stage carring a bag of golf clubs, a shovel, and a hockey stick. Minister walks down to the ring to a mixed reaction. Minister rolls into the ring, and tosses his weapons all around, spredding them out. He grabs a club and stands in the middle of the ring.*

Lilith: well at least Minister can prepared.

Megan: Yeah, this should be an interesting enough match. After all his opponenet is well know for his prowes in the ring.

*"We Will Rock You" by Queen ques up. Rik Felstorm steps out onto the stage to a decent pop. Rik walks down to the ring, his eyes never leaving Minister, who waits for him. Rik circles the ring a few times before getting into it.*

Megan: Minister charges in with his club, trying to have at it at Rik!

Lilith: Rik ducks, and answers with a swift kick to the gut! Minister drops the club and turns around just in time to get hit with a short arm closeline. Minister rolls to his feet only to be cut down again by Rik!

Megan: Rik is starting out this match well. Minister back to his feet, but this time with his arms up, ready to fend of an attack. Rik and Minister both go for weapons. Minister picks up his shovel, while Rik goes for the hockey stick.

Lilith: Minister and Rik go at it with their respective weapons. Minister swings at Rik's head, but he quickly dodges and swings down toward Minister's lower ack. Minister couters, and kicks at Rik's leg. Rik moves out of the way and cracks Minister's leg!

Megan: Man that did not look good at all! Minister is down. Rik goes for the cover..

Lilith:..1...2..Kick out by Minister! Rik picks up Minister and throws him into the turn buckle. Rik charges in, but Minister couters with an elbow. Minister head buts Rik in the side of the head! Minister chops Rik in the side of the head, right on the ear!

Megan: GaH! That looked painful! Minister picks up a golf club and teas off...Minister cracks Rik in the rips with the golf club!

Lilith: Minister is now going for the pin..1...2..Kick out!

Megan: I am not sure how Rik pulled that off, but he kicked out!. Minister picks up Rik and tosses him into the ropes..Minister goes for a close line but Rik ducks..Hobbes Pounce! Rik takes Minister down, punching him the whole way down! Rik gets off and hits a fast leg drop across his chin! Rik picks up Minister and hits a snap suplex.

*Minister gets up to his feet. Rik hits Minister in the side of the face with a stiff kick. Minister falls out of the ring threw the middle and bottom rope. Rik runs to the turnbuckle and jumps off, hitting a splash on Minister to the outside.*

Lilith: Wow! Great move there by Rik! Rik throws Minister into the steal stairs! Minister goes crashing threw them, and it looks like he went hip first! Rik picks up Minister..LOW BLOW!

Megan: Ohh..thats a cheap move if I ever saw one..Minister with a low blow on Rik. Minister bounces Rik's face off the steps, buying himself so more time! Minister with a knee to Rik's gut, followed up by a european uppercut! Minister stomps on Rik's foot!

Lilith: Minister grabs a near by steal chair! She cracks Rik in the head with it! Rik is down! Minister throws Rik back into the ring..Minister goes for the pin..1..2..Kick out!

*Minister gets up angerly, climbing to the top rope. While he is doing so, Rik slowly crawls to his feet and picks up the shovel. Minister turns around in time to get a shovel in the face!*

Lilith: Minister just got knocked right off the top turnbuckle! Minister just landed right out infront of us! Oh, thats not good at all..Minister is slowly pulling himself up. Rik with a cross body over the top rope!

Megan: Minister just got caught by Rik! Rik with a pin attempt on Minister..1...2..Kick out! Again with the 2 kickout.

Lilith: Minister is dragged to his feet by Rik. Kick! STUNNER!! MINISTER Just got Stunned! Minister stumbles back, over the baracade and down onto the hard concrete floor!

Megan: Rik climbs to his feet walks over toward the baracade. Rik bends over to see...

Lilith: MINISTER CRACKS RIK RIGHT SQUARE IN THE JAW WITH A CHAIR! Minister falls back into the crowd as Rik falls onto the floor out infront of us! Minister is pulling himself up onto his feet. Minister pulls himself over the baracade and toward Rik.

*Minister reaches down to grab Minister...*

Megan: CATS GOT MINISTER'S TOUNGE!!

Lilith: AHH! MINISTER JUST SLAPPED ON HIS OWN VERSION OF THE MANIBLE CLAW!!!

*Minister and Rik stumble around trying to force the other down. Minister hits a swift kick between the legs, but Rik head butts Minister at the same time. Both men fall in opposite directions!*

Megan: Man, that looked odd..Minister and Rik are both getting up again. Minister charges at Rik! Rik with super kick right to the jaw!! Minister is down! Rik grabs a table out from under the ring! He sets Minister onto it...Rik rolls into the ring and climbs the top turnbuckle....Rik is up!

Lilith: MINISTER MOVES OUT OF THE WAY!! RIK JUST WENT FACE FIRST THREW THE TABLE!! Minister grabs Rik by the back of his head, and drags him to his feet...Hey umm....Megan..is it that time of the month again??

Megan: Not you to...Flyboy already tried that one..

Lilith:..no look..your.um..bleeding..

Megan: WHAT? But..but..but I already had my..

Lilith: MINISTYLE CYCLE!!!

Megan:...hey I'm not ble...HEY THATS GROSS I CAN'T BELIEVE I FELL FOR IT AGAIN!!!

Lilith:..1...2...3!! MINISTER WINS WITH A MINISTYLE CYCLE!!

Winner by Pinfall >>> The Minister

Megan: ARRRRRGH!!

Lilith: Hee-hee.

**Commercial Break**

"My Hero" by the Foo Fighters cues up as Tommy Zen from the Experimentals comes out to some boos from the Canadian crowd.  Tommy makes his way to the ring, when The Dance Music from Iczelion hits as one half of the Wildpack 2000, Scarlet Foxfire comes out.

Megan: This match could just be a taste of what we might see at Aggression.

*ding, ding, ding*

Megan: Scarlet places Tommy in a standard wristlock, but Tommy is laying in elbows to Scarlet's head.. Tommy's momentum spun him around into a releasing Northern Lights!  Now, Scarlet has Tommy in a wristlock again.. INTO A GERMAN SUPLEX!!

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Thr--

Megan: Tommy kicks out!  Tommy is up, and a snapkick DDT! Bulldog by Tommy-- back drop suplex counter. Scarlet with a whip to the ropes, but Zen comes back with a flying clothesline!  Tommy has Scarlet by her hair, and a flapjack! Snap suplex!  Tommy going for a powerbomb.. SCARLET REVERSES WITH A HURRICANRANA!!

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One!

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Two!

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Kickout by Tommy!

Megan:  Tommy gets to his feet... BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX ON SCARLET!!

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One!

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Kickout!<p>Lilith: You know, Megan after Riot Rulz, I'm pretty free.

Megan: ... I have plans. Tommy on the top rope-- flying DDT!

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One!

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Two!

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Scarlet kicks out!

Megan: Tommy whips Scarlet... RIGHT INTO THE REF!  And Scarlet goes flying out of the ring!  With Tommy, right behind her.  Tommy rolls Scarlet into the ring-- WAIT, through the crowd it's Chainsaw!!  They have Tommy from behind... Con-Crotch-O!!

They roll Tommy back into the ring, and Tommy is talking stuff to them from behind, but a low blow by Scarlet! Heiny!

Lilith: High knee or heiny?

Megan: Scarlet on the top... moonsault pin!  The ref is back... sees the cover...

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One!

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Two!

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Three!  Scarlet wins!

Winner by pinfall >>> Scarlet Foxfire

Megan: Now, Chainsaw is beating Tommy Zen! We have to take a commercial break!

**Commercial Break**

Megan: Well, ok then, Now its time for another Tag Tourny Match!

Lilith: Yeah, last time we had one of these, we had some pretty screwed up happenings.

Megan: Yeah well, that was last time. This time we already have the Nash and Booker in the ring. And!

*"Countdown to Extinction" plays on the PA as Rash, carrying a "We Need alot More Megan Eko/Playboy signs", and Baby makes their way to the ring.*

Lilith: Well...

Megan: How embarrising..

Lilith: Well its true...what is that?

Megan: Thats a sign and you know what it says Lil..

Lilith: No no no, THAT!

*Lilith points at some small little hats circulating around the ring. Suddenly they end up infront of the annoucers booth. They jump up!*

Lilith: ELVES!! EEEEK!

Megan: GET OFF! GO AWAY!

*Lilith and Megan back hands the elves off the desk. The elves run into the ring, behind Nash and Booker.*

Lilith:..what on earth are those things doing?

Megan:They are pulling something out of their pockets..IT looks like a weapon!

*The elves fire some kind of weapon at Nash and Booker. Suddenly the tag team is frozen!*

Megan:..oh no...

Lilith: THESE EVLES ARE RUININ OUT TOURNEMENT!

*Suddenly Minister jumps out of the crowd sporting a golf club. Minister rolls into the ring, swinging his golf club wildly. Minister smacks the elves into the front row as they scatter and run away. Minister leaps after them, screaming in a high pitched scream*

Megan:....

Lilith:....

Megan:...well anywho, Rash rolls into the ring hitting the Rash Attack! Right off RASH ATTACK!

Lilith: Rash attack on Nash! Rash Attack on Booker! They are helpless to defend themselves, thanks to the Elves!

Megan: Baby is on the outside, waiting for a tag. Rash hits standing Moonsault on Booker! Rash drags Nash over booker and climbs the ropes! MOONSAULT!

Lilith: Well hell, the guy could pin these guys and get the same result! Rash just wants to mess these guys up and prove he is not to be messed with...not that beating frozen guys up is the best way to go about it, at least we get to see some impressive moves.

*Baby is begging for a tag but Rash just ignores her. Rash picks up Nash...Symbiote Claw!! Rash picks up Booker using the Symbiote Claw as well!*

Megan: Rash has both men! Both but there is not tapping because..They Can't Move!!

Lilith: Oh! Rash reverse the hold into a double Jumping Chokeslam! Amazing!

Megan: Well this has been a pretty one sided match since those damn elves invaded..Nash and Booker are set up like dominos now..Rash is climbing to the top rope...

Rash: Here's..Johnny!

Lilith: GOORE! GOORE!!! FROM THE TOP ROPE! GORE!!!

Megan: Right threw both men..Rash going for the cover, an easy, if not belated, win...1...2...3..NO! What the hell? Rash picks up both men before the 3rd count falls...he lays Nash in one corner..and Booker in the other..

Lilith: It looks like he is taggin in Baby..Finally..Baby is in the ring. BRONCO BUSTER ON NASH!!!

Megan:..and..now..A BRONCO BUSTER OH BOOKER!! Rash is dragging Nash and Booker into the middle of the ring..He is picking up Baby in a Military Press!

Lilith: Military Press from Rash to Baby onto Nash and Booker! Its like some bizarre Booker Sandwich!

Megan: Thats gross Lilith..

Lilith: Sorry, but its in my nature to be like this hehe..

Megan:..right....1....2....3...Easy Victory here folks..

Winners by Pinfall >>> Baby and Rash

Lilith: and theres the match...one of the most one sided matches I have ever seen...

**Commercial Break**

**Commercial Break**

We come back from break as "Take a Look Around" by Limp Bizkit cues up...bringing out, of course...

Megan: Our World Heavyweight Champion on her way to the ring!

Lilith: Whose WONDERFUL BEAUTIFUL PORN WAS BURNED BY THAT RAT LANCE!! *sob*

"On her way to the ring...for special guest color commentary...she is the EAW...World Heavyweight Champion....SONNETTE KINTOBOR!!

Megan: A superstar-studded main event coming up here, folks. The world champion doing commentary, another of our superstars referring, a former world champ going up against once of the biggest names of WCW before it collapsed...

Lilith: Ah...for 10 minutes alone with those two...too bad Lance is just gonna get whacked around.

Sonnette takes a seat at the announce table, pats Lilith on the head.

Megan: Well...this will be a pleasure, welcome, Sonnette. I take it you have an interest in this match...?

Sonnette: F*ckin' A, I do! I'm facing one of them at Aggression--and I'm gonna get started scouting. Either I get to see Hunter beat Lance's ass here tonight, or I'll get to do it then. Don't matter to me either way.

"Oh, Canada" cues up, prompting nearly everyone in attendance to stand up.

Sonnette: Ugh...if it weren't for the whole patriotic schtick...and the fact that Hunter's pissed nearly everyone here off...I couldn't see these people giving a damn about Lance.

Lilith: So that ten minutes won't be a mercy "quickie?"

Sonnette: No. I'd make a Regal joke...but after his match earlier tonight, I don't want to put my foot in my mouth.

Lilith: Well...you don't have to...because you can put in mine.

Sonnette: hee-hee

"The following match up...with TV time remaining...is a Falls Count Anywhere match with the number one contendership on the line...vs. Lance Storm's Canadian citizenship and 10 minutes with Sonnette and Triple H. Introducing first...from Calgary, Alberta, Canada...he stands 6 feet even and weights two hundred and thirty two pounds...LANCE...STORM!!

Lance gets a face pop the likes of which is rarely heard as he steops out from behind the curtain, waving the flag of his homeland as he makes his way down to the ring.

Sonnette: Could this be a cheaper way of getting cheers? At least Mick gladly admitted when he went for a cheap pop.

Lance makes his way down to the ring, setting aside the flag as he climbs inside, staring down Sonnette for a moment...

Sonnette: *flips Lance off*

Megan: That's our world champ...always the simple approach.

Sonnette: Why waste words on him?

The lights go dark as "Primal Concrete Sledge" by Pantera then cues up, turning the crowd response to the polar opposite of before...to VICIOUS...VICIOUS booing, cursing, swearing even before Lance's opponent is announced...

"And his opponent...is from Greenwich, Connecticut...stands 6'4" and weighs in at two hundred...and forty six pounds. He is accompanied by Hera. He is the current number one contender for the EAW World Heavyweight Title; 'The Decadent,' Hunter....Hearst...HELMSLEEEEEEEEEEY!!"

Hunter makes his way out, a wicked expression on his face, as he walks straight down to the ring...ignoring the crowd's response.

Megan: Any one of these two you'd rather face?

Sonnette: Don't know...I was REALLY looking forward to facing Hunter...but if Lance wins the contendership...so be it.

"Return to Innocence" by Enigma then cues up...

"And the special guest referee for this match up..."

Sonnette: WHOOO--HOO!!

"Ladies and gentleman...this is LUPE!!"

Lupe gets a mixed reaction as she makes her way out...many of the fans knowing how dead set she is against Lance. However...rather than referee stripes, she has another outfit on...

A shiny black silk manderin style dress (Think what Shampoo from Ranma wears many times) that hugs her curves quite nicely, the hem coming to mid-shin and the whole thing having embroidered patterns through in matte black. Down past the thighs on either side, just below the hips, the dress is slitted straight downward.

Sonnette: Wow!! I don't think I've seen her in THAT before! I wonder if it's one of Colley-chan's she borrowed...or it's a new one she got.

Lilith: Either way, it sure brightens this little she-devil's day!

Megan: Well...this is an odd choice for her to make, considering that this is a match and not a fashion show...but...she doesn't need to wear an official refereeing outfit I suppose....

Lilith: Maybe Hunter or Lance will...ACCIDENTALLYSTRIPHERDOWNTOHER..BRAANDPANTIES!! BRAANDPANTIES!!!

Megan: Jerry Junior strikes again.

Sonnette: Hee hee...can you blame her, Megan?

Megan: I have nothing against furries...but...I'm not into women at all.

Lilith: There are lots of women who'd like to be in to you!

Megan: *ahem* Well...all these extra stipulations..guest this...guest that...aside, this is a match between two of the finest wrestlers in this business...Lupe ready to signal for the bell...*ding, ding*

Megan: Lance peeling out of that corner and launching himself towards Helmsley with right hands!! Repeated ones!! Irish Whi--no, blocked! Helmsley with a knee to the midsection. Sends Lance toward the corner...Lance springing off--behind Helmsley now--dropkicks him against the corner!! Lance up on the second rope...1...2...3...4...5--Helmsley out of the corner--drops him face first on the buckle!! Lance staggering away from the corner dazed....BACK DROP BY HELMSLEY!!

Sonnette: Come on, Hunter!!

Megan: Helmsley back up...Lance getting up but favoring his back a bit--KNEE into the midsection of Lance again....set up...Suplex hoists him high in the air...drops him down center of the ring...and Helmsley taking control in this early going.

Lilith: Of COURSE! Hunter loves to be in control!

Megan: I take it you mean...nevermind. Helmsley waiting on Storm as he gets up...Helmsley charges in--Storm deflects it...rams Helmsley shoulder first into the ring post!!

Sonnette: Damn...Hunter's neck's gonna be a few inches longer on one side...

Lilith: Huh? Hunter...few inches longer...wha, where?!

Megan: Uh...Lance Storm going for the sunset flip follow up...

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On--kickout quick by Helmsley! Helmsley pulled up by Lance...shoulder blocks Lance into the corner....sends him into them...drop toe hold on the return!! Hunter up...modified arm lock chokehold...Storm attempting a reverse...up to his feet...elbows to the midsection of Hunter...Storm off the ropes now...dropkick to the legs of Helmsley takes him off his feet!! Hits the other ropes now...drops the leg down into the back of Hunter's neck!

Sonnette: Imagine if his nose got stuck in that mat like my quills have from time to time...

Lilith: Hee-hee.

Megan: Hunter pulled by Lance to his feet...locking on a rear chin--no! Snapmared over by Helmsley!! Lance up again...arm bar takedown...yanks him up by that arm...Irish Whip....ducks the clothesline...Lance hits the opposite ropes...CROSS BOD--POWERSLAM COUNTER BY HELMSLEY!!

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ONE!

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Kickout!!

Sonnette: A little bit slow, there...

Megan: Maybe, but it looked about the same speed as the one she did for Lance. Helmsley pulling up Lance...scoops him up over his shoulder...rushes toward the ropes...drops him throa--Lance grabs on to the top rope, breaking his fall!! Helmsley going for--Lance flips out to the apron!! Helmsley after--spinning elbow by Lance connects...grabs the head of Helmsley--snaps his neck down across that top rope!!

Sonnette: Oooooo...that's a weak point fo r Hunter.

Megan: Storm out on the outside...grabs Hunter's ankles...pulls him out now....has a chair...beating on the ankles and knees of Hunter now!!

Sonnette: As much as a bastard he is...he has the right idea, folks...

Megan: Lance yanks Hunter out...that chair caught on Hunter's right leg...DROPKICKS HIM!! Hunter's weight hitting the outside as it snaps against that chair! Helmsley up now....drop toe hold by Lance!! The point of focus for Lance quite clear...smashes his knee into the lower right leg of Helmsley...pulls off that chair...rams it down into the knee!

Sonnette: Lance is an experienced wrestler, and knows that he needs to go after weak points...but isn't this kind of against the rules.

Megan: I suppose that Lupe is giving a little leeway...Lance with the standing anklelock...Hunter crawling towards the railing....leg snap takeover by Lance!!

Sonnette: DAMN!!

Megan: Cover by Lance, hooks the leg...

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One!

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TWO!

Kickout!

Lilith: Whew...it'd SUCK if Hunter lost to Lance...

Megan: Hunter pulled up to his feet...Lance setting him up for--NO!! SINGLE ARM DDT by Hunter!! Getting up now...shaking those kinks out of his leg....Lance pulled up now...whipped into the guardrail!!

Lilith: Hunter's up to something nawty!

Megan: Digging under that ring now...and...pulls out a ladder!! Charges towards Lance...rams him hard into the midsection!! DOWN ACROSS THE BACK!! Hunter rolls him over...cover

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ONE!

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TWO!!--Kickout by Lance!

Sonnette: Well...at least Lupe's counting fair...

Megan: Lance pulled up by Hunter...snapmare takeover...Hunter with a knee buried into the upper back of Lance...Lance trying to shut out the pain..and needs to escape this hold...the crowd rallying behind him...Lance...yes...Lance getting up to a vertical base...elbows to the midsection of Hunter--SIDE BACK BREAKER!! Hunter down!! Lance puts Hunter's leg between the sections of the ladder...out to the crowd...springboard in...DOWN ONTO THE LADDER WITH ALL HIS WEIGHT!!!...and THEN SOME!! Lance pins Hunter...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Hunter gets the shoulder up!!

Sonnette: Holy freaking ****!!

Lilith: YEAAAAH!!! And DAMN don't Hera look fine there at ringside?

Megan: Lance is up again....setting up the ladder now...I think Lance has COMPLETELY lost it now...he thinks he's Jeff Hardy!!

Sonnette: I can't say the thought of Lance breaking his neck trying to pull off a stunt like that doesn't amuse me...but...WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING?!?!

Megan: Lance up top...TRIPLE H BACK UP TO HIS FEET!! SHOVING THE LADDER!! IT'S WOBBLY!! Tipping...tipping..Lance jumps off...landing on his feet...Hunter charges Lance--double clotheslines miss!! Hunter hooks the head of Lance--REVERSE NECKBREAKER DOWN ONTO THE LADDER!!

Sonnette: You've GOT to be kidding me...Lance can't be working right from the neck down right now...maybe ever.

Lilith: I'm betting that Sonnette would have preferred he land in some nasty way on his nuts, though.

Sonnette: Don't matter to me...I'll get him sooner or later myself if that doesn't happen...

Megan: All of Lance's weight snapped down across that cold, hard steel ladder. Helmsley recovering, but has taken a heavy beating himself....Hunter pushing that ladder back up....he can't be having the same thougts, can he?

Sonnette: Sometimes I REALLY question if Hunter's all there...

Megan: Helmsley pulling up Lance....holding tight--INVERTED ATOMIC DROP!! Lance hit hard with that one...Hunter taking him up on top the ladder...he's not...going...to...STORM recovers!! Shoves Hunter off the ladder!! Hunter slumped on the apron...up now--FRONT MISSILE DROPKICK from the LADDER TO HELMSLEY!!!

Sonnette: I tell ya...WHOEVER I end up facing...I'm gonna have to be in TOP FORM...

Megan: Lance rolls Hunter into the ring...Lance setting up Helmsley....Deep Impac--HUNTER BACK BODY DROP--NO, sunset flip!!

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One!

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TWO!

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Hunter reverses into a roll up of his own...

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One!

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TWO!

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Lance breaks out....up now...inside cradle!!

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One!

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TWO!

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Hunter breaks out!! Back up now...LOW BLOW from Hunter on Lance!! Hunter setting him up....suspending up in that posit--DOWN WITH THE PILEDRIVER!!

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ONE!

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TWO!!

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KICKOUT!!

Sonnette: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT??!

Megan: Hera up on the apron...complaining to Lupe about a slow count--Lance pulled up...KNEE TO THE GROIN!!!

Lilith: Damn...guys' genitals have taken a BEATING tonight!!

Megan: Lance sends Hunter to the ropes..back now...CANADIAN MAPLELEAF!!!

Sonnette: But Lupe doesn't seem to notice...

Megan: Looks like a modified version of the Mapleleaf....Hunter's tapping!! Hunter's tapping!!

Sonnette: Oh darn...Lupe and Hera just seem to be having some girl talk...

Megan: Lance letting go...yelling at Lupe now...

*BLINK!*

Lilith: Purple babe behind Lance!! Purple babe behind Lance!!

Megan: Lance turns around...SUPERKICK to Blink!! Blink on the ropes....Lance going back to the Canadian Mapleleaf!!

Sonnette: Damn...we may see Lance MEing Aggression after all...

Megan: Blink shakes it off...

*BLINK!*

Lilith: In FRONT of him now!!

Megan: Blink sets him up....DISPLACE--er, SWINGBREAKER!!!

*BLINK!*

Megan: Blink gone just as quick as she came...Lance prone on the mat...Helmsley pulls him up--this is academic--PEDIGREE!! PEDIGREE!!

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One!

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TWO!!

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THREE!!!

*ding, ding, ding*

Winner by Pinfall >>> "The Decadent" Hunter Hearst Helmsley; still number one contender!!

Megan: Wait...she isn't completely gone...Blink is on the stage!

Hunter looks over where Blink is, and she salutes him as "Atom Bomb" by Fluke begins to play. Blink then *BLINK!*'s completely out of sight before being hit with trash.

Megan: Hera handing Hunter something...I think it's those citizenship papers...he rolls them up...stuffs them into the mouth of Lance Storm...and...continues to lay in the beating on him!!

Sonnette: Hunter just said, "Time me."

Lilith: I think he's...offering you to come into the ring and redeem your 10 minutes. ^_^

The crowd is booing frantically at this point...

Sonnette: Hmm...shall I...hmm..

Megan: We're out of time folks, but don't miss the next EAW Mayheeeeem...!!