The fireworks go off as EAW Mayhem kicks off!!

Megan: Welcome everyone to EAW Wednesday Night Mayhem, and we're only a few weeks away from Razor's Edge...

Lilith: Where we could see a new World Champion crowned! Hopefully either the hunky Hunter or the busty, bodacious Blink.

The lights in the arena dim down to nothing, and the sound system cues up the now-familiar 'sound logo' of Michael White. The lights slowly start up as the logo plays over the PA's, before bursting into a large lightshow, illuminating the entrance and aisle to ringside. Michael White walks out, microphone in one hand, other hand propping the EAW World Title on his shoulder.

Megan: And of course...the defending champion...

Lilith: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Lilith: I'd think you'd be for him--being a Hunter fan...

Lilith: Well, Hunter's kinda trying my patience. And his buddy Gokuo was getting hot Hardley 'tang every night....and he takes that away from him. WHAZUPWITDAT?!?!!?!

The cordless mic is not turned on yet. He quickly makes his way down the ramp and the aisles, hopping into the ring and acknowledging the relative few cheers he manages to get-- everything else is the chants of "ASSHOLE" and "WHITEWIND SUCKS!", peppered with loud jeering. He shrugs them off, as his theme fades out, the lights return to normal, and his microphone turns on.

Megan: The crowd here giving their honest opinion of our distinguished champion....distinguishing him as--a rectal cavity.

WHITE: Hmph. Continue your chanting, children; it does not faze me. I am out here for a purpose, and that purpose is my request for the stipulation of choice in my main event match. I need not acknowledge your ASSHOLE chants.

The chanting, as expected, raises in volume-- as does White's voice.

WHITE: Now, Gokuo, here is my plan: It will be a special match: no time limit, no rules as to countout and disqualification, other than nobody allowed at ringside. The plan is to have a special little form of four-way "Battle Royal..." The falls are decided by pinfall, submission, or otherwise; not over the top rope. The 4 stars in the match-- that being myself and Triple H, the TRUE stars, and Kirk Angel and Blink, the nobodies-- take a small, plastic ball, containing a sheet of paper with a number on it. The number on that ball determines the order in which participants enter the match. Now, unlike most matches, my stipulation is this: After the first 2 participants are in, every, oh, 9 minutes or so, a buzzer will sound. That buzzer signals the next competitor to enter the ring. The buzzer will go off twice: once for the third participant, and once for the fourth. This, in a way, resembles the Royal Rumble. Of course, I choose this match for obvious reasons: To save e my ass. Call me a coward, go ahead; *I* call it being mindful of your own safety...

The crowd, now a little more organized, chants "WHITEWIND" on one end, and "SUCKS!!!" on the other...he simply ignores it as his theme is played and he walks up the ramp, trash bouncing off of him...

--

The match starts off with Eighteen on the upperhands, but Show fights back with a vicious powerslam. Eighteen then has the upperhand for the next 2 minutes, hitting him with various suplexes and even hitting a superkick for a nearfall. Show then comes back as he then hits her with the Final Cut to be only ^1/.99999999 away from the pinfall.

The match ends as Eighteen sets him up for the T.S.F., but Donnie B grabs her legs, forcing her to release the hold. Show then capitalizes and hits her with the Ultimate Finale for the win.

**Commercial Break**

We fade back in to the set...

Megan: Welcome everyone back to EAW Mayhem! Coming up next is a one on one match pitting Kairi Lyger against Lady Jasmine. Curiously...the People's Title is NOT on the line, but it seems like a perfect opportunity for Lady Jasmine to show off against a champion.

Lilith: Yeah...and maybe cop a feel on Kairi--even though--oh yeah--she'd dating one of our cameramen, right?

Megan: You could say that, yes. Much to the dismay of her spherical guardian...

"Awake" by Godsmack cues up, and Kairi steps out onto the stage to an impressive response from the crowd.

"The following non-title match is scheduled for one fall with a 10 minute time limit. Introducing first, from Kyoto, Japan, he stands 5'11" and weighs in at 235 lbs. He is the current EAW People's Champion--KAIRI LYGER!!"

Megan: Kairi Lyger seeming a little less focused as of late on his wrestling, and worrying a bit more about his family.

Lilith: That's right, ladies--he's taken. :P And damn my onset of selective morality...

Megan: That's alright, Lilith; there will be plenty others to drool over tonight.

Lilith: True, dat...

"Wish" by Nine Inch Nails cues up as "Awake" fades out...

Lilith: Alriiiiiiight!! And we get to see my favorite skunk chicky--er, Salusian--out here next. And talk about fit....Austin would be envious.

Megan: ....Austin and his little bit of a beer gut?

Lilith: Nooooo...Denise Austin and her hot sexy thighs, tight tummy, squeezable butt...

Megan: I get the idea...

Lilith: WHAT?! WHAT?! WHAT?!

Megan: ...I won't dignify that with a response.

Lilith: WHAT?!

"And his opponent, from the Royal Palace of the planet Salusia...standing 6'5" and weighing in at 220 pounds--Lady Jasmine!!"

Lady Jasmine gets a pop perhaps just a bit louder than Kairi's, and makes her way down to the ring...

Megan: Now, the People's Title is not on the line in this match up, but with Jasmine's performances, I wouldn't doubt that a title shot is just a short ways away...

*ding,ding*

Megan: Kairi bowing before his opponent--Jasmine returning the gesture, and the two squaring off....wristlock now--headbutt by Jasmine. Kairi knocked down...pickup by Jas--no, Kairi slips free--sends Jasmine to the ropes...clothesli--NO, blocked--Jasmine with an armbar--Kairi escapes--modified ankle lock! Jasmine POWERS out of it! Jasmine back up--Kairi scooped up--SLAMMED down hard, and Jasmine hitting the ropes--duck down by Kairi--HURRACANRANA by Kairi catches her--

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ONE!

Kickout by Jasmine! Big move but little effect.

Lilith: Well, just LOOK at Jasmine. Roy just better make sure they don't get into any fights--or he's in TROUB-LE!

Megan: Well, Jasmine has proven to be rather gentle, overall...a product of good breeding.

Lilith: Yeah...wonder when those two will "breed," exactly.

Megan: Kairi with a belly to back suplex--I don't even know if that's possible, not knowing about the DNA differences, but--Jasmine back up!! A surprised Kairi hoisted up by Jasmine--Military Press!--drops him down to the mat!! Cover by Jasmine

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ONE!

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Kickout!

Megan: Jasmine back up...Kairi dazed as he gets back up to his feet...Jasmine with an Irish Whip--Kairi against the ropes--stops as she telegraphs the backbodydrop--flips over her back--snaps down with a neckbreaker!! Jasmine caught off guard, there...Kairi springing out to the outside--a dazed Jasmine getting up--springboard cross body by Lyger!!

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ONE!

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TWO!--THROWN off by Jasmine!! Amazing!!

Lilith: Well, she could probably bench press 235 with ONE arm, so it's not THAT amazing. Now, Viscera...that's amazing for anyone.

Megan: Lady Jasmine shaking off that offense by Kairi, a little slow getting up....Kairi with a drop toe hold from the mat! Takes Jasmine down--kippups...pulls her up by her arm--spin kick to the back of the head and Jasmine is DOWN! Set up by Kairi--could be an early--BLOCKED by Jasmine!! Fighting back now--elbows to the midsection...Kairi letting loose with mid-level kicks. Jasmine grabs the ankle--counter by Kairi misses. Jasmine going for an ankle--REVERSAL by Kairi into a modified leg lace!! But HOW do you make someone like Jasmine submit?

Lilith: Yeah...she's a real mahr.

Megan: ....mahr?!??!

Lilith: Yeah...JR calls Test a big ol' hoss--Jasmine's a big ol' mahr.

Megan: Oh...that's a new one on me--JASMINE gets to the ropes! Kairi releases the hold...hits the far ropes---Jasmine up--CROSS BODY--CAUGHT by Jasmine!! And a RUNNING POWERSLAM puts him down!!

Lilith: Insert that JR cliche about going to the well here.

Megan: Jasmine pulling up the vulnerable Kairi from behind--and a BLUE THUNDER BOMB!! Pinning combination--

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Kickout!

Lilith: Wow...that's something I haven't seen her do...back up, and Kairi sent to the corn--NO, puts the brakes on--Jasmine sent into the corner--spinning high roundhouse from Kairi!! More mid-level kicks--and a monkey flip!!

Megan: Jasmine flipped out of the corner, and Kairi climbs the rope s to follow up. And a LEGDROP by Lyger!!

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ONE!

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TWO!

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..KICKOUT! by Jasmine on that one!!

Lilith: Whew...close one...Jasmine pulled up by Kairi....arm drag takeover. Jasmine up...another from Kairi...Irish--NO--knee into the midsection!

Megan: Now a takeover attempted by--NO! Jasmine powers him off of her...kick to the midsection of Kairi--DDT DROP!

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ONE!

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TWO!!

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Kickout!

Lilith: Jasmine getting off of Kairi--pump handle--NO, Kairi slips behind!

Megan: Kairi now--FULL NELSON--and the DRAGONBOMB by Kairi!! Hooks the leg--

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ONE!

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TWO!!!

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THR--NOOOOOO!!!

Lilith: Wow...did they slip some crack into your coffee, Megs? Even JR doesn't sound like that...

Megan: Well, what can I say? I'm "feeling" it.

Lilith: Shift your body a little to the right and I'll be feeling it, too.

Megan: *smack* STOP THAT!

Lilith. Sowwy. ^_^ Kairi getting up to his feet...Kairi sends Jasmine to the ropes again--tilt a whirl--JASMINE on her feet--TILT A WHIRL on Kairi--BACKBREAKER!!

Megan: Kairi sent to ropes--caught by the tail of Jasmine--and the INDISCRIMINATE JUSTICE!!!

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ONE!

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TWO!!

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THREE!!!

Winner by Pinfall >>> Lady Jasmine

Lilith: NEW CHAMPION!!! NEW CHAMPION!!!

Megan: Uh...I'm afraid not. It was non-title, remember?

Lilith: Oh...pooh. Although Kairi might feel a little bit disappointed about that, too.

Megan: Maybe so, but we have an upset, here, folks--congratulations to Lady Jasmine!!

Lilith: Yeah yeah yeah!! Maybe she'll get a title shot...

Megan: Well, we'll be back after a word from our sponsors.

Lilith: Well...many words, actually...

**Commercial Break**

"Praise the Lords" by Lords of Acid cues up...

Megan: Welcome everyone back to Mayhem, where it appears that this delicate Hardley family matter...and its effect on the main event of Razor's Edge, will be decided.

Lilith: Or maybe--Hunter will just nab you...I wonder if he and KY...

Megan: If I could have any less respect for Hunter, then that would do it.

Lilith: Well...she IS a Hardley, not like she wouldn't enjoy it--and she certainly lives up to her name...

Megan: Well, President Gokuo's really taken it hard--he hasn't even hit on me today.

Lilith: Heeheehee.

In the ring...

"Now...I'm not in much of a talking mood, so I'll get right to the point. White...MAIKU--whatever you call yourself today. You got your match. As for yer new buddy--alright Hunter...I know you're back there...and I have whatcha want," Gokuo says, reluctantly producing a contract.

"My girl...your shot...bring yer ass out here," he says.

"Primal Concrete Sledge" cues up, with the crown erupting in boos right afterwards....

Lilith: Huntsy!!

Megan: I still don't get the appeal *shakes head*

Hunter walks down the ramp and to the ring, taking the mic from Gokuo.

"Well....it appears you've made the right choice...now, don't think I'm stupid enough to not know what's going on. Where are those Hardleyz lurking....where could they be...?"

"Up here jackass" a voice says on a microphone. The spotlight goes to a skybox, where Ryan Hardley and his family are waiting. "I'm here to make sure you don't puss out on the deal. You got what you want, so give our sister back."

"Stop the ego stroking, cause that's the only thing big enough on you to stroke. Quit your fucking stalling and get to delivering my sister."

"If you haven't noticed, we're out of your way, bitchcakes. Stop being a dickless bastard."

"Ryan--shut the fuck up. You know...I made a promise...but...since you had to get involved, because of YOU...I'm going to have to amend those terms..." Hunter says, smiling.

Ryan just glares down. "What the fuck do you mean. Are you that much of a puss to not keep your promises?"

"No, I'm smart enough to know when I shouldn't. What am I supposed to believe? That all those Hardleys are there to give her a welcome back party?" "Unlike you Hunter, we have some level of moral integrity. Not much I admit, but some nonetheless." (tag)

"Not good enough for me--I'm changing the rules. I'll give KY back--at Razor's Edge."

"Hunter...damnit...we had an agreement," Gokuo protests.

"Don't blame me, blame Ryan. You see...I'd like some degree of protection for my person...and it goes like that--no Hardley, or you, Gokuo, lays a hand on me, and Kyewt isn't hurt...otherwise..."

Ryan just laughs. "I knew you'd be too much of a sackless piece of shit to give her back Hunter." Ryan states, chuckling a bit.

Big Chick, a muscular girl in the tydye and denim, the eldest Hardley girl and pretty much the leader of the non-Ryan faction stands up. "Look here, Hunter. We're tired of your pathetic games. We won't be jumping you. Don't you worry about that. All my life, my job has been protecting the Hardley girls, inside and outside of the family. And I'll be damned if I see one of my girls played round with by the likes of you." She is very upset and looks pissed as hell.

"Sorry, negotiations are..." he finishes making out the signature, "...closed." Then hands it back to Gokuo. "Hunter...I will get back at you for this..."

"No--you're just giving me what you owed me anyway.."

Big Chick, who is trying to leave the skybox, is having to be retained by Large Dick, Stick, Bubba, and J-von.

"Stupid Hardley bitches don't know what's good for them...I mean you too, Ryan." Hunter then tosses the mic aside as "Primal Concrete Sledge" cues up, and Gokuo and Hunter are clearly arguing...

Twiggy Hardley calms Big Chick down as she and the rest of the Hardley's follow Ryan out.

**Commercial Break**

We switch to Michael Cole, who heads towards a familiar looking man with wild green hair, mismatched yellow and purple eyes, a black bodysuit, grey trenchcoat, and a white T-shirt that reads "DO I SCARE YOU?!" in big black bold letters.

"Excuse me! Troublemaker?! What are you doing here tonight?!"

Troublemaker looks to Cole and smiles almost insanely.

"You lost the bet, didn't you?"

Cole pauses, then nods sadly. Troublemaker then squeals with giggles and slaps an arm around Cole's shoulders.

"Why am I here?! Well, Jim! It all started many years ago, when my mom gave birth to me when I was born!" @_@ "It was a rough birth... see, I had to bring ALL MY STUFF out too! My yacht, my jet, and even my pet cow Fergie!! When it was all over, at least she stopped screaming. ... Y'know come to think of it, she stopped doing a lotta stuff after I was born." =/

Troublemaker shrugs and hugs Cole closer.

"Then came the infamous Pooping Incident of 1975! No diapers could hold my deluge!!" @_#! "I WAS UNTAMABLE!!!"

Cole gets a look like o_O;; and whimpers in emotional trauma.

[--HOURS LATER--]

"... Then when I turned 16... whoa, nelly!! I got drunk off my ass and I rammed the planet Jupiter into Earth!!!" Troublemaker continues as Cole has a far off, dazed look to his eyes. "Yeah, everyone and their goldfishies died that day, but I just got out the ol' duct tape and fixed it all up! Yes, I did, Jim!!" @_@ "Then my dad grounded me for destroying the Earth for the hundredth time..."

"... kill me..." Cole mews.

[--YEARS LATER--]

"I remember I set Winston Churchill's ass on fire, Jim!" Troublemaker drones on. "Yeah, he was like... hey, Jim! You can't set my ass on fire! I'll explode! And sure enough he did... wow, all those pieces flying all around all higgeldy-piggeldy. It was cool. Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh..." Meanwhile Cole is trying to hang himself with the microphone cable, then realizes it's wireless and cries.

[--DECADES LATER--]

"And then the bus took me over here and here I was, waiting for you!" Troublemaker completes. "And there you go, Jim! That's why I'm here! I--" he suddenly stops as he sees Michael Cole has been reduced to a cobwebbed decripted skeleton!!

"... Er..." Troublemaker blinks... looks around... and runs very quickly away, as we go back to Megan and Lilith.

Megan: ...

Lilith: ... ^_^;; Heh heh... well... that's Troublemaker for you!

Megan: ... Why... what... how...

Lilith: Oh, don't worry... Michael Cole'll be okay! He'll wake up and think it was all some sorta dream. ^^; Troublemaker's screwy that way...

"Conflict" cues up suddenly as David Flair, with Sin and Shade at his side, head down to the rampway.

Megan: Well, here we go! We still don't know who David Flair's opponent is here in this Extreme match, but it could very well be anyone!

Lilith: Ohh, boy! I can't wait!! Sin! Shade!! My Girls Of Goth!! ^.^! So cute! So bleak! So boffable!!

Megan: Down, girl...

David Flair climbs into the ring, then holds the ring ropes open for Sin and Shade as he turns to the stage area, waiting for his opponent.

"And now... the moment you've all been waiting for..." James Earl Jones' voice (!) booms from the PA. "The most POWERFUL force of nature the universe has ever seen! A VERITABLE POWERHOUSE OF PURE POWER!!!! HE IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Troublemaker.

"Mope" by the Bloodhound Gang cues up as Troublemaker runs out to the stage and gives up a Hurricane-like pose.

Megan: ... You've GOT to be kidding me.

Lilith: o_o! David's opponent is Troublemaker?!

Troublemaker slides into the ring and bounces up and down... cheering and acting like a total goof. He then snatches the mic from Howard Finkle.

Troublemaker: THANK YOU! THANK YOU!! I AM THE TROUBLEMAKER!!! EVERYONE'S ANSWER FOR THAT THING THAT EXPLODES VIOLENTLY IN YOUR PANTS! YESIREEJIM! I LOVE MY BACON AS IT DANCES AROUND IN MY BRAIN SCREAMING LA LA LALA LA LAL AL AL ALA LAL AL AL ALLALAA!!!! @_@

Megan: ...

Lilith: ...

Megan: This guy... he... he's loopier than Perry Saturn!

Lilith: Yep, pretty much...

Even David Flair seems perplexed as he turns to let Sin and Shade out of the ring.

Troublemaker: I would now like to sing a song for all you people! It's a song about these troublesome times and I like to call it... "MY GASSY MONKEY!" @_$

Troublemaker then pulls put a guitar from his trenchcoat and begins to strum it unprofessionally.

Troublemaker: ~/o I HAVE A GASSY MONKEY!! HE'S SO FUNNY TO ME!!! I HAVE A GASSY MONKEY! AND HE JUST CANNOT PEE!! SO HE SWELLS, AND BLOWS UP IN MY FACE!! NOW HE'S ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!!! NOW! HE'S ALL OVER THE PLACE!!! o/~

Megan: ... *eyetwitch*

Lilith: Eek. >.o;

David Flair has his crowbar... going for a running start he swings it hard against Troublemaker's head. To no effect!!

Troublemaker: ~/o I HAVE A GASSY MONKEY! IT SITS THERE ON THE POT!!! I HAVE A GASSY MONKEY! BUT IT CAN'T GET IT OUT!! o/~ ... Does that rhyme? Hm... oh, well. ~/o SO HE SWELLS AND HE BLOWS UP IN MY FACE! NOW HE'S ALL OVER THE PLAACCCEEE!!!! NOW HE'S ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!!! ~/o

Troublemaker flings his arms out as he bows.

Troublemaker: THANK YOU! THANK YOU!! I'M HERE ALL SECOND! I--

He then checks his watch (which isn't on his wrist), then proceeds to leave the ring and David Flair. Halfway up the ramp, he suddenly drops like a rock.

Megan: ...?!

Lilith: Heh... delayed action to that crowbar shot. ^^;;

Megan: And referee Earl Hebner has called for the bell?!

Megan: He's... counting Troublemaker out!

1! . . . . . 2! . . . . . 345678910!!

Megan: o_O;; Okay, THAT was unprofessional.

Lilith: Hey, would YOU want Troublemaker to win?! ^^;

Megan: I guess not...

Winner by countout: David Flair

Megan: Well, David Flair's celebrating nonetheless... we'll be right back after this!

***

This is not a commercial.

***

"Bodies" hits as Deadly Extremity makes their way to the ring to a choral of boos. Savvy "asks" for a mic.

"Everybody, can I please have you're attention?" A small "slut" chant starts from the crowd.

"Can you please listen for just a moment?"

The chant becomes louder as Savvy then gets an angry look on her face.

"DON'T MAKE ME HAVE TO TELL YOU TO SHUT THE F*bleep!* UP!"

The crowd boos as Savvy now screeches. "SHUT THE F*bleep!* UP YOU F*bleep!*ING FREAKS!"

Frosti snatches the mic from her sister. "Alright, alright. Let's cut to the chase. You all know that we've made some comments, that we shouldn't have made. That offended some people. So I like to ask, for Megan Eko to come out here please.

Megan tentatively enters the ring...

Frosti says to her, "You know, after hearing what you said. About the little coment you've made about you being Flyboy's bitch and all. All we have to say is..."

Frosti attempt, but having trouble getting out the words, "We're sorry. We're sorry about starting that gossip about you and Flyboy. And yeah, we deserve to be called tramps. After all, we've disrespected you. You deserve better than to be treated like a skank. You deserve all the..."

Suddenly, Frosti shoves Megan, who trips over Savvy, who on all fours. Frosti then locks on the Elevated Crab as Savvy locks on the Crippler Crossface as well.

"YOU CALL US TRAMPS? HERE'S YOUR TRAMPS, YA C*bleep!*!" Deadly Extremity applies more pressure to their combined submission holds. Security rushes out to restrain them, but Deadly Extermity takes them out. Savvy then brings in a glass table as Frosti goes on top. They then give her the Demoness Fusion through a table.

More security comes out as Deadly Extremeity adds a few more stomps. They then taunt her a bit, then leaves as trash is thrown at them. "Bodies" cues up.

We cut back as we find the MPRW Mountaineer Tag Team Champions Chainsaw, watching with a disgusted look on their faces.

"Deadly Extremity, you've really done it this time. First you totally fuck up Jenna and BG. Then you almost kill the zoots. And now THIS? That was the last straw."

Buzzsaw speaks, "You've already pissed us off after what you've done to Jenny. And now you have to beat up an announcer. A poor defenseless one. And now, it looks like we're gonna have to tell your big secret. That thing that nobody else knows, except you're old XPW bastard buddies. But, since we're softies, we're gonna give you one more chance to keep it a secret. Tell 'em Chaynz."

"You see, there's this event comming up, at Razor's Edge. You know, big PPV around Christmas time. Tonight, we're challenging you to a match at Razor's edge. But it ain't gonna be just any type of match. It's gonna a Tag Team Tornado Bull Pen Cage match. You see, it's just like you're regular Bull Pen Cage match, but it's under tag team rules. And as a bit of a bonus, assuming if it's alright with Paul Trebes, we'll even put the MPRW Mountaineer Tag Titles on the line. The catch?"

"It's simple. If you beat us? We'll keep the big secret on a need to know basis, and the tag titles. Our Chrismas present to you. But if we beat you? Well...let's just say that it'll be really interesting what we have to say. Our present to everyone else you've hurt. Oh, and if you're wondering who our picks are gonna be? Well...it's being determined."

"Yeah. We know that it's probably gonna be someone from Generation-NEXT or XPW in your corner, but we don't know for sure who to put in ours. After all, the line's gonna be pretty big, knowing what you've done over the past few months. Season's Greetings, whores."

**Commercial Break**

Dogg: MAIN EVENT TIME, BAY-BEE!!

Lilith: Hee--we're back already? And any word on Megan...?

Dogg: Well, looks worse than it is--I'm the Rooooooad Dogg Jesse James filling in for the--recently injured--Megan Eko...

Lilith: Very recently. =/

Dogg: Still, with word out she's on the weird wild wacky road of knocking boots with the former Flyboy--just how is HE gonna react to this?

Lilith: Well, he's not the kind of guy I expect to be teaching anger management classes...

"nWo TRIUMPH" cues up as Hunter and White make their way out, with Ric Flair close behind...

"The MAIN EVENT for tonight is a tag team match--scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied by Ric Flair--at a combined weight of 470 lbs, the team of "The Decadent" Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Michael White!!"

Dogg: And ya gotta think Hunter's looking out for Hardleys--having pissed up nigh the entire clan by nabbin' Kyewt.

Lilith: Yeah, although Ryan probably is in it just for another chance to boff her.

Dogg: Ick...can we do without the mental images of incest?

Lilith: Well, Hardley's feel "incest is best." Whadyagonnado?

Helmsley and White get into the ring...

"Rise" by The Cult cues up...

Lilith: Really kinda torn on this one...I mean...I REALLY don't like White--and kinda like each of these guys.

Dogg: Well, don't worry about it--just enjoy da ass-kicking. Too bad Megan didn't get in a few shots before getting taken out.

Lilith: Yeah...I'm sure Chainsaw will give them back what they deserve, though...

"And their opponents, at a combined weight of 330 lbs, the team of Kirk Angel and Blink!!!"

Dogg: This match as it is now WOULD be a sneak peek at how that title match at Razor's Edge could be--but what if White and Hunter are in first? They gonna stall for 9 minutes?

Lilith: Maybe they'll just pretend to be going at it--NINE MINUTE CHINLOCK!!!

Dogg: Well, odd possibilities indeed...and Team Fan Faves hit the ring!

White and Hunter immediately attack Blink as they hit the ring, firing them to the ropes and going for--STEREO DDTS from Angel and Blink!! White and Helmsley bail, then Hunter goes in alone, challenging Kirk. Angel goes after Hunter--but Hunter sneaks in a low blow, and dumps Angel to the outside, where he is fodder for a series of devastating kicks from White, then a clothesline from Flair, then thrown back into the ring. Hunter stomps away on Angel, then tosses him to the opposite ropes--hitting a high knee on the return. He pulls him up--then hits a neckbreaker, then goes for the pin...

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ONE!

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Kickout by Angel!

Hunter tosses Kirk into the corner, and nails some Flair-style chops to a "WHOOO"ing crowd. Kirk retaliates, though, nailing some of his own, then hitting a BELLY TO BELLY suplex on Hunter, then jumps up and down with a "WHOOO!!" of his own.

Kirk makes the tag to Blink, who comes in as Hunter lays slumped in the corner. Blink telegraphs a BRONCO BUSTER--then charges and--FOOT UP by Hunter!!

Blink is repulsed back from the impact, clutching her midsection. Hunter pulls himself out of the corner, and rakes the forehead of Blink with his boot, then uses it to choke Blink, while tagging to White. With Blink held in place, White springs over the rope and onto Blink with a moonsault--

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ONE!--kickout!

Hunter goes back out to the apron, and White pulls up Blink--rakes the eyes, and rams her face to the turnbuckle. Attempts it again--Blink blocks--rams his face ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FI--blocked by White--hard elbow to the jaw! White snapmares over Blink--dropkicks her in the back of the head. White stomps on her chest, then hits the ropes an employs a Flashing Elbow to the sternum.

White twists her body around, and catapults her under the ropes, snapping her neck against the bottom rope. Then Hunter drops his weight down onto her head as he kneels with her neck between his legs until the ref stops it.

White pulls up Blink for a suplex--she slips free--shoving White into Hunter--who falls off the apron and hits the safety railing jaw-first.

Blink then rolls up White, for the--

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ONE!

--quick kick out!

White, caught by surprise, is knocked down with a spinning wheel kick as Flair checks on Hunter...Blink then sends him to the corner--charges in--and mounts the turnbuckle--hitting 1! 2! 3! 4! 5! 6! 7! 8! 9!--and White slips out from under her--Powerbomb Sunset Flipping her, and getting the..

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ONE!

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TW--NO!!

White pound the mat, and gets back up to his feet, climbing the turnbuckle. Blink gets up and is hit with a high-flying moonsault (HBK style), which White follows up by hooking the leg.

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ONE!

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TWO!

Kickout!

White gets up and pulls up Blink--suplex attempt is blocked--Blink hits an inverted Atomic Drop, then hooks White for a Two-handed Face Crusher in the center of the ring!

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ONE!

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Tw--NO!

Blink gets up, and dive-tags Kirk, who was itchily holding out his hand.

Kirk gets in and slugs away at White with right hands, tosses him into the ropes and catches him in--Blink's Diving Death Twist (D.D.T.)?

Kirk keeps it locked on, trying to get a submission off of it--but Hunter steps in a kicks Kirk in the back of the head. Angered, Kirk goes after Hunter--Hunter hops off the apron--and White leg-lariats Kirk over the top rope.

Hunter quickly pulls up the padding around the ring, and slams Kirk down onto it, gives him a few high knees--then tosses him back in.

White makes the tag to Hunter, then restrains Kirk.

Hunter comes in slugging on Kirk, then Hunter boosts up Kirk on his shoulders. White goes up to the top rope, and White getting ready to--

NO!! Blink shakes the rope and crotches White on the turnbuckle!! Kirk hammers away on Hunter's head--slips behind him--BRIDGING GERMAN SUPLEX!!!

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ONE!

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TW--KICKOUT!

Kirk gets up, and Irish Whips Hunter--Hunter reverses--knee into the midsection of Kirk. Hunter pulls up Kirk, hits a backbreaker, and mounts him with a series of right hands. Hunter then fires Kirk into the corner--charges in with a back elbow, and executes a high-angle vertical suplex....

....

....

....

and DOWN in the middle of the ring!!

Kirk holds his back, and Hunter walks over and grabs the arms of Kirk, wrenching them back as he digs a knee into his spine...keeps it applied, but mostly to weaken, not make Kirk submit.

Hunter then goes for a belly to back--but Kirk powers out with a back elbow--hits the ropes and a flying forearm!

Kirk sets up Hunter with a reverse neckbreaker, then a rear chinlock. Hunter gets up to the mat, but Kirk sends him to the ropes--catches him off them and PILEDRIVES him into the mat. Hunter is dazed, then gets back up--goes for a clothesline--counter--INTO A CRIPPLER CROSSFACE!!!

Hunter gets to the ropes as quickly as he can, but it is apparent that damage has been done...he goes for the tag--Kirk stops him, but Hunter knees him into the groin and tags White.

White comes in an hits a dropkick on Kirk...and another...Kirk is dazed, and White hits the SHINING WIZARD on Angel, then goes for the pinfall...

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ONE!

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TWO!

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Kickout!

Angel gets back up, and White goes for a Ger--go behind! Angel with a German Suplex!!.....ANOTHER...ANOTHER!! Goes for--NO, blocked--White breaks free--high kick to the temple of Angel. White pulls up Kirk and gives him an Ultra Nova!! Tags in Hunter!!

Hunter corners Kirk...stomps away at the midsection...but...

Lance Storm comes from the crowd with a chair in hand!! When Hunter turns around, he tosses the chair at HHH, and hits a spinning wheel kick off the top rope with the chair in HHH's face!! The referee calls a DQ, as Lance assaults Hunter with the chair, until White drives him off...

As Lance heads to the back...he yells, "You wanna screw me out of my title? Huh? HUH?! Well, Triple H, you've started something you can't finish. This isn't over... this isn't over at all!"

All of the sudden, the JumboTron comes to life with the image of Ryan Hardley, smiling twistedly, on it. "Hello there Hunter. Did you forget what I said earlier tonight?"

The fatigued Hunter merely looks up at the JumboTron, catching his breath.

"You see...I had a feeling you wouldn't be enough of a man to do what was right...and since you did something wrong in the first place, I had a few of my friends go over to your place earlier."

Just then, footage cues up...Hunter's mansion...and on the camera...is Hunter?

Hunter looks rather confused, seeing as he doesn't remember this...

"Hunter" turns around, to reveal he's wearing a PWF T-Shirt. "Hey there Helmsley, remember me? Yes, I've slimmed down a bit, so don't concern yourself on what's going on. Just watch" Just then, a familiar brown haired girl that tried to attack Gokuo comes on the camera as well.

Hunter walks closer to the screen, leaning on the ropes.

Triple-X and Iceberg walk up to the door of Hunter's mansion. "Now let's see...how to get in..." Triple-X looks around.

Hunter looks extremely pissed and quickly exits the ring...

The footage plays with Triple-X passing the security and entering the house. They look around to see what it's like.

Grandoise yet austere at the same time...a large living room with marble floors and columns...one wing of it somewhat like a living room, carpeted around it. Some fine chippendale furniture about the room...various paintings...a fountain at the top of a large staircase...

"Hmm...not one for the minor, is he?" Iceberg asks, as she shows her stregth by throwing the nearest piece of furniature clear across the room.

XXX smiles and lifts his hand, showing he was carrying a sledgehammer with him the whole time, and starts smashing at some walls of the place. Iceberg in the meantime is destroying and piece of furniature she can get near.

Alerted by the noise, an attractive young blond woman rushes down the staircase. "What the? Hunter, what are doing? If you hated what I picked out...you could have just said so--and who's THAT?" she says, pointing to Iceberg.

Triple-X smiles at this. "Hera Hercig I presume. Tell me, how much do you care for Hunter?" he asks with a smirk as Iceberg inches dangerously close to her.

"...wait a minute....who are you?"

"Xavier Xex Xanatos...but you can call me Triple-X." As he talks, Iceberg goes for a spear on Hera, on the staircase.

A scream from Hera is stopped as Iceberg spears the air out of her.

Iceberg grins and throws Hera THROUGH a nearby shut window.

Lilith: NO NO NO!! They hurt Hera!! DAMN THEM DAMN THEM DAMN THEM!!

The footage of the destruction of Hunter's house continues, combined with Ryan Hardley's laughter, as the camera fades out.