Live from the Arco Arena in Sacramento , California, it's Tuesday Night Mayhem!!

The opening video package for Mayhem is shown...this time with footage of PWF wrestlers interwoven with the others.

Signs litter the crowd such as "TAKER, PLEASE SELL!," "Ashley R. is a bitch." "RYOKAMI 6:66!" "PEDIGREE BLINK!!" "SWINGBREAK HHH!" and "J.C. STONE RULZ YOUR ASS!!!"

Megan: Welcome everyone, to EAW Tuesday Night Mayhem!! I'm Megan Eko...here with...*sigh* special guest PWF color commentator, Jim Slander.

JS: SHOW ME THE PUPPIES!! WHOOO-HOO!! I'm not THAT thrilled to be here commentating for Extremely Awful Wrestling, but someone has to bring an unbiased opinion to this table.

Megan: Yeah, as we all know how unbiased you tend to be.

JS: I appreciate you for recognizing my talent and integrity.

Megan: *gag* Well, our first match of the evening is our Cruiserweight Battle Royale, where one of our EAW wrestlers will walk away after tossing out all the other entrants, then take back our EAW Cruiserweight Title at Unholy Wars...

JS: Currently held by PWF's Capoeria!!

Megan: "Held" in the sense of physical possession of the title--he never won it in a sanctioned EAW Cruiserweight Title Match.

JS: He's the EAW Cruiserweight Champ and the PWF Light-Heavyweight Champ!! RECKONIZE!!

"The first match of the evening...will be...the Cruiserweight Battle Royale Match. The superstars 1 and 2 will enter the ring, and do battle as the other superstars enter according to their number of entrance. They will enter the ring at regular intervals until all wrestlers have entered the ring. Elimination is accomplished by a superstar being thrown over the top rope, and both feet touch the floor. The superstar remaining will face Capoeira at Unholy Wars, and take back the EAW Cruiserweight Championship!"

"Tres Delinquentes" by Delinquent Habits cues up, suddenly...as Capoeira makes his way towards the ring, but then runs around it and heads to the announce table.

JS: Helloooo...Cap!

Cap: Buenos Dias, Senor...Senorita.

Megan: *Ahem* What brings YOU out here, exactly...and where is the EAW Cruiserweight Belt?

Cap: Oh...somewhere...I'm keeping it safe, Senorita...I just decided to come down ringside to get a closer look at whoever will be my opponent.

Megan: Hmmm...understandable, I suppose, but remember that you'll be being watched like a hawk here tonight.

"HT," the theme from Trigun cues up as Colley-chan comes out to a large pop.

Nova...or the former Nova, rather, comes out to no music...still in his battered RTC Man outfit, and charges the ring.

Colley-chan and Nova in a slugfest to start...Nova sent to the ropes...dropkick by Colley-chan. Nova staggers against the ropes. Colley grabs his feet and tries to toss him out, but he grabs the ropes, flips in...headscissors Colley-chan and snaps her over. Colley gets up...clothesline by "Nova." Scoop slam attempted by Nova...blocked, Colley lands behind--reverse neckbreaker! Pulls him up...another slugfest.

"Strobe's Nanafushi (Satori Mix)" by Kodo plays as Black Widow enters the Battle Royale as #3.

Quick double team by "Nova" and Widow as "Nova" fires Colley-chan to the ropes, and they double arm drag her over. "Nova" then turns on Widow, sending her into the perpendicular ropes, then flies with a cross-body on her!! He presses her overhead, then goes to toss her out, but Widow grabs the top rope, locks her legs around "Nova's" neck and flips him out with a modified headscissors!!

Eliminated: "Nova."

Colley-chan gets up, and swings and misses a clothesline on Widow, who back suplexes her by suprise. She hits the ropes...somersault leg drop!! Pulls her up and goes for a whip to the corner...Colley-chan reverses, and backdrops Black Widow out of the corner!

The dance music from Iczelion plays as another former Cruiserweight Champ, Scarlet Foxfire, hits the ring!!

Double team backbreaker by Wildpack 2000's members onto Black Widow, who then execute a swift double suplex on Black Widow. Black Widow ties up with Scarlet, after nailing a spinning heel kick on Colley-chan, and hits a release Tiger Suplex on Scarlet!! Scarlet kippups, and ducks a Black Widow sidekick, dragon screw leg whips her, then catapults her into the corner...Colley-chan and Scarlet backdrop her again.

"My Hero" by Foo Fighters (instrumental) cues up, and "The Extreme One" Tommy Zen of the Experimentals rushes out to the ring, then immediately drops a hard kneedrop onto Black Widow, then goes for Scarlet.

Back at the announce table...

JS: Enjoying the action, Cap?

Cap: Si, senor.

JS: Anything I can get you? A Pepsi...some coffee?

Cap: Gracias, but I have a bottle of water right here *pulls it out of his back* You wan some?

JS: Er....I'll pass...

Cap: You, senorita?

Megan: I'm....not thirsty.

Cap: *shrugs, then sips it*

Megan: I'm curious...why aren't are at the Spanish announce table, exactly?

Cap: You think I'm loco? I know what happens to those tables...a wrestler goes through it all the time!!

Suddenly, from behind him and from the crowd--it looks like Spike Dudley in camo pants!

Cap: Agh---

Megan: What the hell? It's...it's...Stick Hardley!! From PWF!! Just coming from behind the guardrail, and attacking Capoeira right in front of us!!

JS: What are you doing, Stick!! This is your co-worker!!

Stick ignored Slander, ramming Cap's head into the table repeatedly. He then rolls him onto the table, pulls him up, sets him up in a diamond cutter ready position, then uses the guardrail to help him get some air as he hits an Acid Drop through the table!!

JS: THE ULTIMATE HIGH!!! RIGHT THROUGH OUR ANNOUNCE TABLE...well, your announce table, anyway.

Megan: Stick Hardley...one of the inbred, redneck Hardley clan--who possess a gene pool so shallow that it comes up to Max Mini's waist--has just attacked fellow PWF'er Capoeira--the PWF Light Heavyweight Champ, and possessor of the EAW Cruiserweight Title.

JS: And POSSESSION is 9/10's of the law...but what POSSESSED Stick to kick Cap's ass?

Megan: You should know more than me...but tonight, Spanish announce table or no, Cap went through it...

Back in the ring...

The Wildpack and Widow momentarily triple team Zen, with Colley-chan drop toe-holding him, and a double legdrop from Widow and Scarlet connects. The Wildpack then fire him into the path of a Black Widow leg lariat!

"If I Get Locked Up Tonight" by Eminem cues up, and Buzzsaw hits the ring, and spears down Zen!! Zen is then pulled to his feet, and fired towards the ropes by Buzzsaw. Zen grabs the ropes, but Buzz dropkicks him, and Zen has trouble holding on...he then flips back in, but Black Widow and Buzzsaw team up to toss him back out, eliminating him.

Eliminated: "The Extreme One" Tommy Zen

Buzzsaw and Black Widow with a quick martial arts exhibition, with Buzzsaw catching her by suprise with a hard elbow shot, then a short arm clothesline. Buzzsaw and Colley-chan then in a collar and elbow tie up, as "The Unforgiven" by Metallica cues up...

Alexander Nagol then rushes out to the ring, and slides in as the match continues...

Buzzsaw and Scarlet pair off again and begin to brawl. Buzzsaw blocks an attempted suplex, and reverse suplexes Scarlet stomach-first onto the apron. Scarlet grabs the ropes to save her from elimination, but a baseball slide into her feet trips her up, and she falls to the outside on both feet.

Eliminated: Scarlet Foxfire

Nagol then begins to duke it out with Buzzsaw, blocks a right hand from him, and arm drags him over, then pulls him up, shoulderlocks him, then Russian Leg Sweeps him down. Colley-chan and Widow go through a wrestling sequence, as Colley-chan attempts to suplex Widow out of the ring to the floor, but Widow lands on her feet behind Colley-chan, catching her with a dropkick as she turns around, and a sweep kick as she kippups.

"Blood Brother" cues up as Ninja X comes out.

Slugfest with Alex and Buzzsaw turns into a crisscross after a Buzz Irish Whip, Alex charges Buzzsaw, and nails a Flame Line to eliminate him by over the top rope, just before Ninja X can stop him.

Eliminated: Buzzsaw

Ninja X and Nagol lock up, and Ninja X fires Nagol into the ropes, and double high leg lariats from both ninjas (X and Black Widow) floors Nagol. Colley-chan and X then lock up, and a pair of snap suplexes onto X, as Black Widow attempts to toss Alexander over the top rope.

Alexander blocks, and attempts to throw Widow over, who drops down to the mat and rolls out. Ninja X and Alexander resume their brawling, and X attempts to hoist Alexander backwards out of the ring. With a springboard dropkick, Widow comes back into the ring and nails X, nearly knocking him over the top...Alex finishes throwing him out with a quick push, but walks into Widow's Kumo No Sasu.

Eliminated: Ninja X

Colley-chan and Widow double team Alex, with Colley-chan holding him in place to be victim to a series of kicks. Alex reverses, and holds Colley-chan in place, and Widow works her over as well, before Nagol suplexes her over.

"Return to Innocence" by Enigma cues up, and Lupe rushes out to the ring to enter the Battle Royale.

Nagol then attacks Widow, turning her inside out with a Flame Line, then hitting a sidewalk slam to knock the air out of her. On a criss cross, Lupe drop toe holds Alex, and Colley-chan and Widow hit stereo standing moonsaults onto Nagol. Nagol fights his way up, then brawls with Lupe, teetering her near the ropes...

"Angel" by Aerosmith plays...but Mandy LePew doesn't come out...

Megan: Now this is odd...Mandy's supposed to be out here next...but where is she?

Backstage...

"RAAAAAAUGH!!"

*wham!*

Megan: The hell?! Mandy just slammed into that production truck...and...it's BOB?!?!? We haven't seen him in EAW in months?!

Behind Bob...we see...Alan Fletcher.

AF: Great work!! But we're only part done...

Back to the announce position....

Megan: What is he talking about?

JS: I dunno...friend of your RTC?

Megan: No...just some nut who works for FETA...and...Bob and Fletcher coming out here now??!

JS: Uh oh....

Megan: Bob hits the ring...right behind Widow!! Scoops her up...overhead press....and...TOSSES her to the outside!! Not even a chance to grab a hold of the ropes!

"Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" by Grinspoon cues up....and CRASH HOLLY rushes out towards the ring...with a steel chair in hand.

Megan: CRASH now?! I thought he was after Lady Jasmine?

JS: Heh...maybe he exchanged numbers...but either way, he's gunning for a REAL superheavyweight in that ring...because I don't think that Bob qualifies for the title!

Crash hits the ring...then Bob (with the chair). Several chairshots later Bob teeters against the ropes, and other hard shot sends him flipping to the outside, though he lands on his feet. Crash then climbs up top, and leaps from the turnbuckle towards him--but is caught and chokeslammed!

(Self) Eliminated: Crash Holly

Lupe and Nagol fight it out in the cente ro the ring as Colley-chan tentatively begins to aid Lupe in the matter. Some double teaming on Nagol....

"Wish" by Nine Inch Nails cues up just a bit after, and Lady Jasmine rushes out,then hits the ring to clean house, clotheslining Nagol and Lupe, and tail-sweeping Colley-chan.

The four furries battle it out, much to the chagrin of Alan Fletcher, who attempts to tell them all to band together...until...

BOOOM!!

A large explosion occurs from the stage, where a glowing (and angry looking) Mandy LePew stands, who then charging down the rampway and towards the two who attacked her, driving them away from the fallen Crash Holly, and hitting a large plasma blast into the seat of Fletcher's pants (!)

Fletcher and Bob run like hell through the crowd, managing to lose Mandy along the way.

An unfamiliar theme then cues up...

"And now, the first mystery participant...from parts unknown...the 'Harbinger of Vengeance'...MAIKU!!!"

JS: MAIKU?!

A young man rushes out, dressed and with his face painted to resemble the Great Muta.

JS: WHOA!! It looks like Muta!

Megan: No, that isn't Muta--he has hair. That's one half of the CAPW Tag Team Champions--MAIKU!

MAIKU hits the ring, nailing hard kicks to the midsections of Colley-chan and Nagol, then hitting a thrust Kick to Nagol, and a spin kick to the gut of Colley-chan. Lupe attempts to grab him from behind...MAIKU blocks it, turns around...GREEN MIST to Lupe!! A pump kick sends Lupe over the top rope, eliminating her.

Eliminated: Lupe

Lady Jasmine, however, blocks a kick by MAIKU with her tail, yanking him off his feet, and making him prey to a pick up, and a Powerbomb by Colley-chan!! Nagol then follows up by hitting a top rope Flame Line as he gets up...

Nagol and MAIKU continue to brawl, with Nagol hanging onto the advantage until MAIKU sneaks in a low blow, and hits a cobra clutch suplex!!

"One" by Gravity Kills then cues up...

"The second mystery entrant...Jyushin 'Thunder' Lyger!!

JS: You mean that REALLY IS...?!

Megan: Yes, that's THE Jyushin Lyger...odd bit of a theme there...first a Muta impersonator, then Lyger...

Lyger hits the ring, and knocks Lady Jasmine off her feet as she has MAIKU pressed overhead. MAIKU and Lyger double team Lady Jasmine, sending her over the top rope and to the floor!

Eliminated: Lady Jasmine

Colley-chan and Nagol then pick one of the mystery partners...Nagol with MAIKU, and Colly-chan with Lyger, and a slugfest erupts...MAIKU is armdragged over by Nagol, but gets up armdrags him as well, then dropkicks him into the chest as he gets up. MAIKU and Lyger then double team dropkick Nagol, spilling him to the outside.

Eliminated: Alexander Nagol

They then turn on each other, exchanging a series of kicks, until Colley-chan pulls away Lyger, and hammers away on him, then sends him into the ropes. Lyger kicks Colley in the midsection, and then sets her up for a Lygerbomb, but she blocks it, and nearly gets off one of her own until MAIKU breaks it up with a Reverse DDT!

MAIKU stomps away on Colley, but when he pulls her up, she counters by hitting a Jawbreaker, then a double leg takedown!! She scoops and slams MAIKU onto the outside...leaving us down to the last two.

Colley-chan and Lyger lock up...Lyger attempts a suplex but Colley-chan counters it with a hard knee shot. She's shot to the ropes...drops down as Lyger jumps over her...Lyger springs off the ropes...CAUGHT by Colley-chan--NO, Lyger slips behind her, set up for the reverse suplex...holds her up for what could be the the reverse brainbuster--NAILS IT!

Lyger gets up, and pulls up the heavily dazed Colley-chan, clotheslining her back down!

Lyger pulls her up and hits a few hard kicks on Colley-chan...but Colley-chan blocks one, ducks the Enzui Giri, and applies a Boston Crab!

Lyger breaks out of the Boston Crab, and gets up...sends Colley to the ropes...drop toe holds her. He pulls her up...she swings behind...double backslide with, Lyger successful. Lyger attempts a catapult, but Colley-chan kicks him off. She kippups, and snapmares Lyger over...pulling him up...POWERBOMB!! A SECOND!! She pulls him up...rushes towards the ropes...and TOSSES HIM OUT TO THE OUTSIDE!!

*ding, ding*

"The winner of the Cruiserweight Battle Royale, Colley-chan Dogstar!!"

Megan: Incredibly!! Colley-chan, the first wrestler in the Battle Royale, has won the whole thing!! That's a rare and very impressive accomplishment.

JS: A battle royale to see who will be cannon fodder for Cap..wotta shame.

Megan: *ahem* Well, when we come back, Michael Connelly vs. La--VANCE Storm!! Don't miss it!

**Commercial Break**

(Note: Adam wasn't able to do his match, so here's what happened in it in summary form)

"There's a Fire in the House" cues up as Michael Connelly makes his way out, down to the ring...

"Oh Canada" then plays as Vance Storm comes out...looking so much like the EAW's own Lance Storm it's scary...

The match begins with a series of chain wrestling, as Connelly snap suplexes Storm, and Storm blocks a second one, and counters with one of his own, then goes to the waistlock, side suplexing him down. Vance wrenches back on the leg a bit then goes for the leg grapevine, then an STF!

Michael manages to reach the ropes, but is then yanked up to his feet, and sent to the ropes...Vance attempts a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker, but Michael lands on his feet behind Vance, pushes him into the ropes, and rolls him up for a bridge pin, nearly getting a two!

Michael pulls up Vance, and suplexes him high and hard, getting a long one. He then heads up top, waiting for Vance to get up, and nails a missile dropkick!!

Vance kicks out at two, and Michael heads to the outside, going for the Connelly Comet, which Vance sidesteps, and turns into a dropdown armbar!!

He then goes for an armbreaker, a reverse armbar, a scissored armbar, and the Barry Darson "Barely Legal" armbar.

Michael fights through the pain of the various armbars, and reverses an armWRINGER into a hammerlock, hitting a surprise Tiger Leg Sweep, then a springing off the ropes high elbowdrop, then follows up with a running senton splash.

Michael then gets up, and attempts a suplex...blocked by Vance...reversed into a small package for two.

Vance takes control by firing Connelly into the corner, then following up with a superplex for another two, then goes for the submission again with a version of the mapleleaf...Michael again gets to the ropes.

Vance attempts an Irish Whip, but Michael counters with an Inverted Atomic Drop, then bounces off the ropes and hits a cross body for a two count.

Vance kippups, and dropkicks the legs from underneath Connelly, then pulls him up and pump-handle slams him...long two.

Michael is pulled up...standing switch...German Suplex with a bridge!!!

Nearly a three!!

Irish Whip by Michael...this time Vance counters, with a snapover suplex...floats over...1...2...3!! as the referee misses the feet on the second rope as Kirk Angel comes out from the back (sans music)

Vance heads to the back, and when Michael gets up, Kirk sneaks up from behind to hit an Olympic Slam!!

**Commercial Break**

Megan: We're back! And we are set for our next match... it's going to be one hell of a battle between Alexander Nagol and the Anti-Savior, Ryokami!!

JS: Oh, you're telling me! Even in the PWF they're talking about the monster known as Ryokami! The psychotic son of the EAW Commisioner Shaed Bloodgrave! This is going to be extremely brutal, Megan!

Suddenly, "Look Alike" by Riu Konaka cues up!

Megan: Huh? Who--?!

JS: Ahhh! It's Sasha Speedster! Our own Sasha Speedster! She's come out for this match! ^-^ I hope she sits next to me, Megan!

Megan: ... You remind me so much of someone right now... =p

Sasha walks out to ringside, turning around to the commentators' desk and sitting down to Slander, putting a headset on.

Sasha: Hey everyone! ^_^

Megan: Hellow, Sasha! Welcome to the EAW!

Slander: Welcome indeed! ^-^ Woo-hoo!

Sasha: Down, Sarge. I'm here to cheer for Alex here... and tonight he's going to beat the crap out of that skull-faced psycho! He--

"Schism" by Tool suddenly cues up! A figure steps out to the stage, dressed in a white hooded robe and an Egyptian-style neckdress holding it to the figure.

Megan: ... A friend of yours, Sasha?

Sasha: ... I... no way! I have no idea who this person is...!

JS: Looks like one of the Undertaker's old druids, Egyptian style!

The figure walks down the aisle, jumping to the apron with ease, then over the top rope, spinning around into a cross-legged sitting position in the middle of the ring, facing the Jumbotron just as it comes on to feature the scene of the AAA match... the Mojave Desert! The figure reaches for the hood and slips it away, revealing the head of a very lovely felis sapien woman with emerald eyes and dark brown fur.

Megan: Who... who is she?!

JS: Who cares? She's pretty! Here, kittykittykitty!!

Sasha: ... But... why is she here? Watching this match?! What kinda stake she got in this?

The robed cat-girl remains transfixed onto the Jumbotron, as we all are... as the scene shifts to Ryokami... at his side, Mystyc. Alexander Nagol shows up in a flash of speed, brandishing the Shintai, but not attacking just yet as Mystyc blocks his way. She turns to face Ryokami, wrapping her arms around him and kissing him deeply... Ryokami kisses back just as passionately.

Sasha: Ugh... what the hell does she see in that freak?

JS: ... Yeah, I mean... geez, she's much more pretty than that guy!

Megan: There's no question that Mystyc may be just as twisted as Ryokami... the PWF's own Hebnerbot has been commissioned to referee this match... it calls for the bell and we are about ready to buckle in tight... it's about to get wild!

Megan: Alex rushes in with that hedgehog speed! FLAME LINE TURNS RYOKAMI INSIDE OUT-- OHH, RYOKAMI LANDS ON HIS FEET! HARD ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO ALEX'S HEAD!!!

JS: AHHH! O_O!

Sasha: NO! Ryokami recovers too quickly!! GET UP, ALEX!!

Megan: He does get up! Ryokami blocks a high kick-- OH, BUT SWIFT KICKS TO THE CUT ROCKS THE ANTI-SAVIOR! TOPPED OFF WITH A HURRICARANA-- NO! COUNTERED INTO THE POWERBOMB?!! HOW--?!

Sasha: ... That cat-girl in the ring is laughing... what the hell does she find so funny here?! She a Ryokami supporter?!

JS: Ryokami's showing a lot of recuperative power here! Moreso than usual!

Megan: Ryokami gets Alex up... BEATDOWN!!! Alex is hurting here and we've just started-- WAIT! ALEX TRIPPED RYOKAMI!! ELBOW DROP! ANOTHER! ANOTHER!! Pick-up... HURRICARANA! AND THIS TIME IT WORKS!!

Sasha: NO! He just kippuped! DAMN! Can nothing stop this guy?!

Megan: Alex still has the Shintai... he swings it and-- O_O! ALEX SLASHED RYOKAMI ACROSS THE CHEST! AND RYOKAMI... my God, he's actually in pain!!

JS: AHHH! O_O!!

Sasha: Hehe. ^^ Alex told me before the match... he soaked the Shintai in holy water! And it looks like it works!

Megan: It certainly does... you can hear Mystyc's scream of protest from the background here! She's really livid! Or is that anguish?!

Sasha: Who the hell cares? Ryokami's getting what's coming to him!

Megan: Alex slashes at Ryokami again! Ryokami's hurting badly here! It looks like Alex is going for a killing blow!! But that's against the No Ki-- WAIT!! MYSTYC JUST STEPPED BETWEEN ALEX AND RYOKAMI!!

Sasha: Is she nuts?!

"NO!!" Mystyc screams, almost in tears as she shields Ryokami with her own body, preventing Alex to strike him down. "PLEASE DON'T HURT MY RYO-SAMA!!!"

"... Mystyc..." Ryokami whispers softly. "... You are beautiful..."

Mystyc smiles softly at Ryokami. "I will do anything for you, Ryo-sama."

"I know."

Suddenly Ryokami jumps up--

Megan/JS/Sasha: O_O!! O_O!!! O_O!!!!

--and drives a Kurokage katana THROUGH Mystyc's back, the blade exiting from her chest and piercing Alex's shoulder!!

Megan: DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN!!! DID WE JUST SEE THAT?!!!

Sasha: Ryokami just KILLED Mystyc?!! He... used her as a distraction and got the advantage!! That bastard!!

Ryokami catches Mystyc as she falls limply into his arms, Alex dropping to his knees as he clutches his shoulder in pain. Mystyc still lives, but fading fast as she smiles weakly at Ryokami.

"... I helped you... Ryo-sama..." she whispers.

"Yes... you did, my mate..." Ryokami nods, smiling.

Mystyc nods in turn... and leans in close... whispering something faint in Ryokami's ear... a glint of light flashes upon the killer suddenly. Mystyc smiles in a form of triumph... then goes limp, eyes still open as a trickle of blood oozes from her lips.

Megan: Mystyc... my God, Mystyc just died...

Sasha: ... Man, I... I never thought Ryokami would go this far! And Alex... oh no, Alex is still down!

Ryokami pulls down Mystyc's eyelids, and dabs a little blood from her lips, drawing the Kanji of "ten" onto her cheek. Setting her down, he looks to Alex, noticing his recovering from the attack.

"Now you die," Ryokami says with a dark smile.

Suddenly a huge blast of silverish-white light explodes from out of nowhere, striking Ryokami in the back!

Megan: O_O!! WHAT THE HELL?!!

JS: AHHH!!

Sasha: O_O! WHERE DID THAT COME FROM! OH... oh, that hit Alex too! ALEX!!!

The silverish beam ceases... and Ryokami looks to be literally steam-cleaned, silverish steam rising from his bones, mouth open in a silent scream. The skeleton steps back... and collapses into a pile of bones. Alex, at the same time... is completely healed. The camera quickly turns to see the Paraclete and the winged woman... Miracle... standing at a distance.

Megan: ... I... folks, this... this is... the Clan Justice... more specifically Miracle... has just killed Ryokami...! I... I'm at a loss of words as to what has just happened here...

Sasha: ... How about, "woo-hoo?" I mean... I feel sorry for Mystyc and all... but Ryokami had this comin' for a long time here!

JS: ... Yeah...

The Paraclete nods to himself, then taps his comm-symbol. "System, teleport by two, homeward bound." And suddenly, the two super-beings vanish in a flash of light.

Meanwhile, the cat-girl in the middle of the ring stands up, pulling the hood over her head, she jumps from the ring and walks back up the ramp, leaving the ring area.

Megan: ... Folks, we... we need to take a commercial break... we've got to sort out what just happened here...

***

"Here Comes the Money" By Naughty By Nature cues up as Donnie B, Rash, and the Big Show make their way to the ring too a chorus of boos.(A "Donnie Sucks" chant starts)

Megan: Welcome everyone, back to EAW Tuesday Night Mayhem!! We're set for 6 man tag team action...as the first team...Donnie, Rash, and the Big Show, are all on their way out here.

JS: I don't know about you, but I'm a little disappointed...I mean, no Baby out here...and there hasn't been any cute girls out here since the Battle Royale!! Well...besides you...

Megan: NO THANK YOU, JIM....I'm not interested.

The Blue World Order theme cues up as Stevie Richards and Blue Boy come out in Blue's blue Saturn.

JS: [Blue Boy] I don't make millions like some of the guys here, but I made enough to get my Saturn!

Megan: Well, for all we know he could drive it as a promotional stunt...so they may have GIVEN it to him...although I'm not sure.

"Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck" by Grinspoon cues up for the second time tonight...

Megan: And here comes their partner for tonight, who made a showing in the Cruiserweight Battle Royale earlier...though eliminated himself due to having no interest in the Cruiserweight Title.

JS: Well, he isn't even a cruiserweight!! Does 400 lbs. sound like a cruiserweight to you?

Megan: He just SAYS he's 400 lbs, he's not actually 400 lbs.

JS: Trust me, he is. He just carries it well.

Megan: Suuuure he does. Big Show is going to start out for his time...Crash hits the ring...hammering away on the massive Show!!

*ding, ding*

Show and Crash start the match off, Show taking the early advantage with his power, then headbutts Crash to his knees. Show pulls him up, then slams him down hard! Crash gets up, and Show fires him into the ropes, catching him and hitting a rib breaker when he returns, the pins him, getting a long one count.

Show pulls him up, and sends him into the corner, slapping his chest hard a few times, then tagging to Donnie B.

Donnie comes and works on Crash, ramming his head into the turnbuckle a few times, then into the boot of Show, who tags back in.

Show goes to (gasp) suplex Crash...but Crash sneaks in a low blow when the ref isn't looking, then hits a DDT as Show doubles over!! Crash makes the tag to Stevie...

Steve rushes in and hits a side kick on the Big Show, who is knocked a bit off balance but not down. Stevie then lays in a few rights, and Irish Whips Show. Show reverses, and backbody drops Stevie on the return, then drops a quick leg. Show then gets up...pulls up Stevie, and goes to hit a backbreaker, but Stevie slips free...hits the far ropes, and dropkicks the back of Show's legs, knocking him down to his knees.

Stevie takes the opportunity to slam Show's knee into the mat, and tag in Blue Boy, who assists Stevie in using a double wishbone on Show!

Blue Boy continues to attack the legs as Stevie goes back out, by dragging Show towards a corner, and hitting a second rope elbow to the inner thigh area. He goes for a boston crab, but Show powers out of the maneuver. Show gets up, and Blue Boy hits the opposite ropes, and goes for a cross body...Show catches up...SHOW WITH A POWERSLAM!!

Rash is then tagged in...

Rash and Blue Boy don't even go for any wrestling moves, as an angered Rash lays in stiff rights, and whips Blue Boy into the corner, then nearly decapitates him with a clothesline!! Rash then sets up the stunned Blue Boy for...and executes...a BALDOBOMB!!

Rash stomps away on Blue Boy, then pulls him up...wristlocks him...then climbs up on top...then executes the Rash Attack!!

2 count only...

Rash pulls up Blue Boy, then goes for a piledriver now...Blue blocks it, backdropping Rash, then springing back up...Rash gets up, and is tripped up by Blue, who drop toe holds him, then gets up...hooks him in a headlock variation, and BULLDOGS him!!

Rash shakes off the move as he gets up slowly, and Blue Boy hits his own version of the Rash Attack...the Blue Blaster!!

Likewise, a 2 count only...

Blue Boy tags in Stevie, who takes over where Blue Boy left off with some kicks to the midsection, firing Rash into the corner, then puts a boot across his throat.

Stevie goes for a DDT as Rash staggers out of it, but, Rash surprises him by hitting a vertical suplex!!

Rash tags back to Donnie...who thus far hasn't done much in the match, but goes after Stevie with some knees to the midsection, then a swinging neckbreaker. He goes up top for a splash, but STEVIE GETS THE KNEES UP!!

Stevie gets up before Donnie recovers...who does so slowly...

Stevie goes for the Stevie Kick, and stomps away in the corner to nail Rash...

Crash from the top with a missile dropkick on Stevie?!

Blue Boy gets in the ring, but so does Donnie and Rash, who help beat down the pair...

Crash then hits the Alabama Slamma on Blue Boy. Rash then picks him up and slaps on the Final Bite--spitting him out to the turnbuckle.

The Big Show gives Stevie 2 consecutive Showstoppers, as then holds him up....Donnie takes the opportunity to hit Richards with the Donnie Cutter(A variation of the Donnie Cutter).

*ding, ding, ding, ding*

Winner >>> No Contest

Megan: Crash's sudden appearance indeed seemed suspicious...Crash is with Donnie and his pair of thugs!!

JS: Hee-hee...EAW on EAW violence!! I LOVE IT!!

Megan: I thought you were supposed to be Jerry Lawler derived?

JS: Well, after seeing Stick attack Capoeira, it's good to see that your wrestlers are having similar troubles.

Rash, Show, and Crash now drag their fallen opponents near a turnbuckle, as Donnie then orders Show to go up on the top rope...

Megan: You've got to be kidding me...a 500 pounder??! Up to the top!?!

JS/Megan: MOONSAULT?!??! MOONSAULT!!!!!!

Show moonsaults off the top, creating a hole in the ring in the process...Show crawls out of it...

Donnie: Ladies and Gentlemen. What you see tonight, is a begining of a new era. What you see, is the begining, of the next generation. What you've witness tonight is only a sample of our dominance in EAW.

Crash: Stevie...all I have to say to ya is this: Sorry pal, nothing personal. It's just buisness.

Donnie: Richards... Blue Boy... this is only the begining. We are the new generation. We are Generation-NEXT!

Megan: What does Pepsi's one-time ad campaign have to do with this?

JS: EAW has sold out!!

Donnie and Co. puts the final boots to their fallen opponents as "Here Comes the Money" cues up again!

**Commercial Break**

[Ready in 5... 4... 3...]

Megan: And now, it's time for the match just about everyone in both of the federations have been waiting for! Two of the PWF's finest take on two of the EAW's best in a tag-team match to remember!

Slander: And don't think that I'm being a bit slanted here, but I gotta lean towards Rattler and Venis, if only for the fact that ol' snake-eyes IS who he is, and that's bad news for Triple H and Blink!

Megan: Everyone's going to have their work cut out for them tonight!

Disturbed's "Livin' Inside You" fires up, and a pair of now-familiar men march down the ramp towards the ring, one wearing the PWF Universal title. He immediately hits the corners while the other works it for the ladies in a vaguely familiar fashion.

Slander: Shawn Venis and The Rattler... hehheh! Two champs, as far as I know, and a good barometer to see how the PWF measures up with the EAW!

Megan: There's no doubt in my mind that they're strong-looking wrestlers, but only time will tell...

"Primal Concrete Sledge" hammers on the sound system, and The Decadent stalks towards the ring, eyes fixed on his two opponents, but mostly on Rattler. As soon as that happens, the crowd begins to roar for blood

Slander: I've seen eyes like that before, and they're usually attached to people who like to hurt other people! I don't hafta see him fight, I *know* this is gonna be a fight!

Megan: Triple H has a history of not being the most... open wrestler in this business, and his hatred for the PWF is beginning to show, especially with his recent offer to the so-called Tag Team of the Third Millennium, S&M...

Slander: Bunch of thugs, I tell you.

Megan: At least we agree on SOMETHING, Jim.

"Sledge" soon segues into "Rise", and the crowd pops again, Blink quickly running down towards the ring and sliding in underneath the ropes...

Slander: And we have HOT STAREDOWN ACTION!

Megan: For a second, at least... it looks like it'll start off with Triple H and Venis... the bell's rung! It's time for action!

Slander: Tie-up to start... and it's knee time right from the word jump! Trips with a sharp kneeshot to Venis's chest... and another! And a kneelift puts the Heartbreaker down onto the mat! Triple H jumps... going for a kneedrop... and gets nothing but the mat!

Megan: Venis is, if anything, agile! Already on his feet... ducks a right from Triple H and SLAMS him in the chest with a back heel kick... followed by a grab, hop... and a backroll throw to toss The Decadent away! And Venis back on his feet... to pose?!

Slander: Hey, you gotta please the ladies... and I know his sweetie's always pleased with him... hehheh!

Megan: ... Triple H up... another tie-up... and Venis is backed into the ropes... Sato asking for a clean break and gets o--Triple H with a vicious chop to the chest of Venis!

Slander: WHOOOOOOOOO!

Megan: And another! And an-Venis dodges the third chop and--gets a backhand chop from The Decadent to put him flat on his back! Trips down... rising and dropping the knee on Venis's thigh! His kicking one, might I add!

Slander: He's not playing games! Taking out Venis' Love Connection would be a crucial part of winning this match!

Megan: And Venis looks like that knee hurt him a bit... up, but a bit gimpy... Trips rushes in and into an armdrag! H back up... and runs into another one! Trips pounding the mat in frustration as Venis strikes another pose! Trips rushes Venis again... Venis goes for a SUPERKICK, but misses and gets kneed right in the thigh! Triple H is trying to methodically cripple Venis!

Slander: And it's starting to work... Venis needs to get up and tag out!

Megan: Triple H dragging Venis up by his hair... and HITTING the reverse neckbreaker! Triple H goes for pin!

.

.

.

ONE!

.

.

Venis kicks out! He's still go some fight in him, but Triple H aims to take it out! Triple H has Venis up... and whips him to the ropes! H goes for a high kn--Venis CATCHES Triple H and counters with a BRUTAL powerbomb variant! Venis up... sill favoring his leg, but waiting for Triple H... CATCHES him with a beautiful neckbreaker drop! Venis back to his feet... and he looks towards Rattler!

Slander: Whoa! The crowd just screamed the roof off!

Megan: Venis thinks about it... TAGS IN RATTLER! And Rattler rushes Triple H! Piston-like right hands rain down on Triple H, backing him into a corner... and Rattler proceeds--

Slander: To stomp a mudhole in him and walk it dry!

Megan: Rattler yanks Triple H out of the corner... and THESZ PRESS right onto Triple H's back, knocking him down! More rights to the back of Triple H's head! And he's off... bounces off the ropes... elbowdr---Triple H kicks Rattler RIGHT IN THE GUT AS HE FALLS FOR THE ELBOWDROP! That looks like it took the wind right out of his sails!

Slander: Not to mention his lungs!

Megan: Triple H up... a few stomps to the PWF champ... and a kneedrop to his arm! Triple H on his knees, slapping on a joint-lock on that same arm, grinding it in with his leg! Sato's down and watching for a submission, although I doubt we'll get one this early!

Slander: Nothing doing, Megan... hell, Rattler's getting up now!

Megan: Rattler fighting his way up! On his feet... and Triple H elbows Rattler in the jaw, staggering him! Triple H looks a bit shooken up himself... and moves towards Blink!

Slander: If the crowd screamed the roof off before, they're gonna scream the whole arena down is Triple H ta--

Megan: TAGS BLINK! And Blink's in the ring... looking at Rattler with some serious determination... and Rattler stares right back! They lock up... the size advantage is all Rattler, and he backs Blink into a corner, but HARD! Shoulderblocks into Blink's midsection... and Rattler cinches Blink up... SOLID suplex puts Blink down!

Slander: Textbook suplex! Couldn't do it better!

Megan: Rattler waiting for Blink to stand up... she's up, and Rattler goes for he--THESZ PRESS FROM BLINK PUTS RATTLER DOWN! And she punches away at Rattler! FLIPS OFF.. and a TOWERING legdrop hits! Blink wraps on a quick cradle! For the win!

.

.

.

ONE!

.

.

.

TW--Rattler all but THROWS Blink off of him! And he follows after her like a rabid dog! Blink and Rattler exchanging blows... Blink sneaks in a swift spinning back kick, stunning the Rattler--SHE HOPS ONTO THE TOP ROPE! On Rattler's shoulders and going for the Dragonra---OH! MY GOD, RATTLER JUST DECIMATED BLINK WITH A SPINE-CRACKING POWERBOMB!

Slander: I felt that one from over here! I wonder if that hurt Blink or the ring more! Eeeeeeeeeesh!

Megan: Rattler hasn't let go of the hold, and keeps Blink down, going for the pin!

.

.

.

ONE!

.

.

.

TWO!

NO! Blink slips away, but she looks like that one move took alot of that determination right out of her the hard way! Rattler looks... *impressed*? But that doesn't last long... he's got her up... another swift suplex! Backing away and waiting for Blink to stand... I think I know what time it is... Blink around and STU--BLOCKED! Blink whips Rattler around and latches on---BIG GERMAN SUPLEX, almost folding Rattler in half! Blink up... and going up top! She's gonna fly---

Slander: Swanton BOMB! OW, that's gotta hurt!

Megan: Blink rolls to her feet... and I think she's gonna go for the Swingbreaker! Waiting... waiting... RATTLER'S UP! She bounces off the ro--VENIS with a yank of Blink's hair to unbalance her, and she falls flat on her back! And heeeeeere comes Triple H, right through the ring and towards Venis... and VENIS is in as well! We've got a pier-sixer going on! Rattler and Blink trading punches! Venis and Helmsley squaring off! I can barely tell what's going on!

Slander: The ref knws better than to even try and break this mess up, or he might end up on someone's bad list!

Megan: Blink and Rattler seem evenly matched, but I think Hunter's getting the best of Venis! The Heartbreaker's staggered... Triple H going for another kneelift... and gets pushed off and away! VENIS WITH A SUPERKICK--

Slander: That's "Love Connection", Megan!

Megan: --AND HITS BLINK RIGHT IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD! TRIPLE H DUCKED AND LET HIS PARTNER TAKE THE SHOT... and she stumbles... over to Rattler--STUNNER! STUNNER! STUNNER! MY DEAR GOD, BLINK JUST SNAPPED FROM THAT STUNNER LIKE A RUBBER BAND!

Slander: What did I tell you?!

Megan: Rattler goes for the pin, with Venis and Triple H still locked up!

.

.

.

ONE!

.

.

.

TWO!

.

.

.

THREE---TRIPLE H JUST THREW VENIS AT TOMMY SATO!

Slander: And hard enough to break something! He looks a bit hurt from that one!

Megan: Venis is trying to apologize, but Triple H gets in his face---LOVE CONNECTI--TRIPLE H DUCKS AND IT HITS SATO! MY GOD, WHAT IMPACT! SATO'S CALLING FOR THE BELL! Rattler thinks he's won, but boy is he in for a surprise!

Slander: A dirty trick from a dirty man gets him and his K.O.-ed partner the win... man, that Triple H is SLIME!

Winners, by DQ >>> Blink and Triple H

Megan: But I don't think this match is done at all! Venis and Triple H start scuffling again! Triple H still has the upper hand... but a HARD knee and a Salto Suplex put him down! Venis over... stomping for the Love Connection again...

Slander: WHAM! Triple H's brains hafta be in another zip code by now!

Megan: It looks like Venis may have some sort of revenge... but HERE COMES RATTLER, and he looks PISSED! And now Venis is trying to expla---STUNNER FOR VENIS! I hope that made him feel better, because here comes Blink... to shake Austin's hand?! She still looks a bit rattled, no pun intended...

Slander: Hey, it's all about being a sportsman! And look? See?! They ARE shaking hands! Can't say the same for Triple H and Venis, though... hehheh!

Megan: Well, they're definitely gonna have a REAL match come Unholy Wars! And if this is any clue of what kind-of match we're in store for...

Slander: It's aaaaaall good!

Megan: This is Megan Eko, along with Jim Slander... and this IS the EAW!

Slander: And the PWF, in part! Seeya! Hehheh!